All Grown Up: A Penny Shannon SuperBrawl IX RP

"… We ain't gettin' any younger", Topher Neville sang, bopping his Fratboy shoulders from side to side as his slick, Fratboy hair stood motionless in the wind. "Because I-I, I-I won't stop."

For Topher Neville and Brett Spenser, self-professed Frat Bro's who made up the widely popular recording group, the Vapers, tonight couldn't have been any better. Here they were in the ultra-hip, San Laguna de Montero club in downtown Pasedena, playing to a packed house of a good couple thousand partygoers who were absolutely stoked about their latest, and most successful single to date, "Farther".
Indeed, life was good for these two Fratboys who seemingly got everything they wanted off the hard work of their parents. And with a song that only took them fifteen minutes to record on an iPad, the world, it seemed, was theirs for the taking!

"Baby, I'll be going farther," Topher sang, throwing out his hand as if to lay a mega sick beat. "Cause my junk ain't gettin' harder. Right here inside your Rover, that you stole from your grandmo-"

And just before, he could lay down the most powerful chorus written in all popular music, the hard rubber from a charging bouncing sole struck Topher Neville right across the jaw with such force that his neck cracked a little as he fell to the stage floor.

"What the , dude?!" gasped Brett Spenser, from behind his booth as his records and buttons started spinning out of control, turning their perfect piece of pop heaven into an ear-breaking fuzz of nonsense.

"You're next, o!"

The puddle began to drip between Topher's legs as he looked above, shaking now, as the pig-tailed assailant came his way. With the pair of boobs that looked like they we're going to spill out of the hoodie, it was obvious that this hater was female- and at the very least, an inch, inch and a half taller than Topher.

"Wh-who are you?" Topher asked, trembling now as the drip between his legs began to spread.

"Your worst nightmare."

"Penny Shannon?"

Penny kneed him in the face; the brunt of her knee colliding into the thick of his nose, forcing it back into fragments of what it once was as the back of his head recoiled violently against the booth. "You're damn right."

"Get off him, you ing bitch!" Brett Spencer shot out. He was the tubbier one of the group, with a fuzz of facial hair that wasn't respectable enough to be called a five o'clock shadow and a dad bod that came without the virtue of being anything close to a responsible father.

"Your turn, Rogen!" Penny snarled, grabbing Brett Spencer by the popped out collar of his light-blue button down. She punched him in the jaw and pulled him over the booth to throw him down into the ground, right next to his best bro in the entire world.

Topher, bloodied, turned to Brett and asked, "Bro, what's going on?"

Brett turned back to him and replied, "Bro, I don't know but I think we pissed off thi-"

Penny punched Brett in the face. "That's for writing my favorite song of the summer!"

"The ?!" Topher shot out, crying.

Penny stomped on Topher's crotch; twisting her heel as if to stub out a half-dead cockroach. "And that's for being such craps about it too!"

Penny pulled back and kicked Brett in the balls too, evening up the score. "Like, for an hour, I actually liked you guys. I thought you were chill, so chill in fact that I was more than ready to completely give myself to you- which is something I hardly ever to bands, but nooo. You guys had to be douchey frat bros, and I could almost forgive that because your songs are really ing good!"

"So, why are you hurting us?" Brett asked, weeping almost.

"Because I want you boys to appreciate what you have before you piss it all away by being crap heads."

"What?" Topher asked.

Penny punched Topher. "I'm giving you a chance here!"

"A chance?" Brett asked.

Penny kicked him the face, dislocating his jaw a little, knocking off a tooth. "Yes, a chance."

Penny stood back up and surveyed her damage. "Because the next time I hear or read about another douchey thing to come out of your douchey faces, so help me God, I am going to do soo much worse."

"But we're bros!" Topher pleaded. "It's what we do."

Penny stepped on his balls again. He would have cried, too, had he been able to feel anything.

"Still not an excuse, hun."

As so, as the creative (dick)heads of the Vapers withered in agony, Penny started to laugh. She was very much pleased with her work here tonight, in spite of the thousands of would-be clubbers who were all collectively losing their crap behind her.

Her laugh grew, taking a turn for the maniacal now as the San Laguna de Montero club started to burn around her. Now, this was just awesome… She just set the roof on fire, like literally!

… Penny…

… Penny…

Penny…

…Penny

Penny!


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"Penny, wake up!" Mary said, shaking Penny, who's strange and hysterical laughter had plucked her away from a dreamless, yet otherwise restful sleep.

Penny wasn't waking up, but she was certainly snoring… And still laughing, at that!

Mary grabbed Penny's shoulders and shook her as hard as she humanly could, "Penny, wake up!"

Still cackling like a hyena, Penny awoke from her slumber and looked at Mary. "Mary!" She yawned. "Babygirl, what's going on?"

"You were laughing in your sleep," Mary replied, running her hand through the brown weave of bangs that decorated her forehead. "Again"

"Hmmm, I was having an entertaining dream."

Mary sighed, pushing herself away from Penny's arms as she sat up and leaned against the wall. "Was it about the Vapers again?"

"Do you still love me?"

Mary rolled her eyes. "There you go again."

"I'm sorry." Penny shrugged, leaning forward. "What can I say? I'm sure you're sick of me hating on them."

"It's not that I'm sick of you hating on them", Mary replied. "It's just that I can't stand when you get worked up over hating on them because it stresses me out."

"I don't know why they bother me so much."

Mary crossed her arms. "Does it have something to do with me liking their songs?"

"Not really," Penny replied, sighing. "This has more to do with me liking their songs. I think."

"What's the problem with liking their songs?"

"They're douchebags!"

"So are 80% of the other people we listen to, but we don't make a fuss about it."

"I can get that."

"But?"

"But it's just that they're such douchebags!" Penny shot back. "Like blatant douchebags and it's just hard to imagine someone that douchey writing a song that you and I…"

"You and I what?"

"… That you and I kind of", Penny looked away. "God, what the ?"

Mary touched Penny's shoulder. "What is it?"

Penny kept her arms crossed and murmured, "It's just that, you and I have had some pretty awesome times to that song."

Mary rubbed Penny's shoulders. "We have."

"And I dunno", Penny continued, rolling her eyes. "I guess it's a bit of a bummer that the two people responsible for a song that was there when I fell in love with you a little bit more turned out to be douchebags."

Mary's face softened a little.

"That's all," Penny said. "I dunno, I really don't care about a lot these days but I care about you."

"I can see that," Mary said, dropping her head on Penny's shoulder. "You've even stopped wrestling."

"Oh Babygirl", Penny sighed. "You don't even want to get me started on that."



All Grown Up:
A Penny Shannon SuperBrawlIX RP



A cool Arizona breeze swept through the dry Arizona night as the McGurk Wrestling Academy saw home to its bi-monthly wrestling shows. Initially, it started out as a way to give the ringrats a chance to work in front of a crowd before Wayne let them loose on the world, but over the last year, it had started to turn into something a little bit more.

There was a strong crowd of four hundred packed into the cramped gym. When the big man started running the shows, you usually had friends and family of the rats filling up the venue. But as he started to run more and more shows, bringing top talent from the indies and the occasional vet to headline the shows, more and more people started showing up. The first four rows filled up pretty quickly, leaving the rest of the audience on their feet. They didn't seem to mind, though. They already had their favorites among the rats.

"Huh", Scarlett said, taking a peek from the other side of the curtain. "I think this is the biggest crowd my Dad's ever pulled in here."

"Oh yeah?", Penny murmured, texting.

"Mhm," Scarlett nodded, turning to look at Penny now. "Like, he announced us in the main event like what, three days ago? And we turned in twice as much people as he drew in for the last show."

"Cool"

"Like the last time we ever partnered up together was for the pay-per-view in Japan", Scarlett shrugged, assessing the situation as she ran her fingers over the cleft of her chin. "And how long ago was that?"

"Mhm."

"Hey", Scarlett turned to Penny. "Are you even listening?"

"Yeah, I'm here."

Scarlett looked at her phone and raised an eyebrow. "You sure about that?"

Penny looked away from her phone and shrugged. "I'm sorry?"

"Dude, where are you?"

"What do you mean?"

"Here I am talking about how amazing it would be if we actually went full time as a tag team again and you're not even paying any attention to me," Scarlett said, throwing out her shoulders as her eyes shifted somewhat to the side. "What could possibly be more important than this right now?"

Penny's phone buzzed. Scarlett looked down at the screen.

"What's happening to you?"

"What's that supposed to mean?" Penny shot back, tucking her phone between her tights as she started Scarlett down.

"You don't care," Scarlett replied. "You just don't care anymore."

"That's not true."

"It is," Scarlett said, her tone cutting a bit harder now. "It's like ever since you got a girlfriend, you just stopped caring about everything."

"That's not true."

"Yeah, it is," Scarlett said, again. "Why can't you admit it?"

"Because it's not true!"

"Penny", Scarlett began, looking as if she was making it a point to be extra careful with the words that came out of her mouth. "You signed yourself into a match against Dex that could actually cost you your career."

"So, what? It's not like he's going to beat me anyway."

"But still."

"That's a load of crap coming from you, you know." Penny shot back. "Like, if you wanna get into this, you haven't made the best decisions either."

"I know that, which is why I can't help but be a little concerned."

"But I've got this."

"See", Scarlett said, throwing up her hands. "It isn't even just about Dex, it's about everything else. Like maybe, you got your feelings hurt by missing out on the International title, or maybe you just didn't like the way things were going, but the girl that's standing in front of me right now isn't the same one who I tag teamed with back in Japan."

"I don't know what to say."

"You don't have to say anything, I just know you don't care as much as you used to."

"I don't." Penny looked away. "Happy?"

"No."

"Then what the do you want from me?"

"Nothing.", Scarlett replied, hearing the sound of her theme music as she inched herself closer to the curtain. "Just promise me you'll actually try out here tonight."



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"Baby"

Penny couldn't help but feel herself relax at the sound of Mary's voice. It just felt like the most comfortable thing in the world to her; it felt like home. The entire world could end tomorrow and as long as Mary was there, with that cute little drawl of hers, it would be fine.

"Babygirl…" Penny hushed, closing her eyes now she pressed the tip of the vape between her lips.

"How was the match?"

"It was alright." Penny replied, taking a pull of her vape. "I wanted to strangle Scarlett, but we won."

"Awww, how come?"

"Just some stuff she said.", Penny replied, breathing out as the scent of what was supposed to be Strawberry Yoghurt filled the space around her in a mist.

"What did she say?"

"Stuff about how I don't care about wrestling anymore." Penny replied, her hand shaking as she cradled her phone. "… And the thing is, she's right: I don't care."

"Why don't you care anymore?"

"I don't know… I guess I'm just tired."

"Yeah?"

Penny nodded. "I'm twenty-five years old. I've been doing this since I was seventeen. I've got nothing to show for it but a bruised body, a dead eye, and a butt-hurt ego?"

"Penny, it's okay." Mary hushed. "There are things you can do other than wrestle."

"Like what though?" Penny shot back. "Wrestling's all I really know and it's just suddenly occurred to me that I don't want to go on selling weed forever. I don't know what else I can do."

"We'll figure that out. Just come home already."

"I'll be home when this is all over." Penny closed her eyes and took a deep breath, sighing as she dropped her head against the pale stucco wall behind her. "You're still meeting me in Pasadena for SuperBrawl right?"

"Of course!"

"Perfect." Penny smiled. "I can't wait to see you."

"I can't wait to see you too."

"What did you do to today?"

"It was alright, it was my day off," Mary replied. "Nothing really that exciting."

"Tell me about it anyway." Penny smiled, allowing herself to relax now as she lay down on the bed and curled to her side.

Sure, they were a couple hundred miles away from each other, but right here, in her Tempe room, with the air-conditioner running on medium, and the faint sound of Scarlett and her boyfriend ing in the other room, things seemed alright.
For now.


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"Can't sleep either, can you?"

"What are you doing here?" Penny yawned, staggering into the kitchen, with one hand behind her back; scratching her ass. "You live like right next door."

Wayne kept the cigarette between his lips as he grabbed the Tupperware from the refrigerator. "Got hungry."

"What's that?"

"Arroz Con Leche," Wayne replied, pulling the cigarette away from his lips as he grabbed a couple spoons from the drawer.

"And that is?"

Wayne took a moment to translate. "… Rice pudding. You want some?"

"I'm good." Penny shrugged, waving Wayne off as she sat down on the kitchen table.

Wayne set the Tupperware down on the table and saw down across from Penny. "You sure you ain't hungry?"

"I'm good."

Wayne handed Penny a spoon.

"Thanks."

Wayne nodded as he took a drag off his cigarette.

"Can I ask you a question?"

"Go for it." Wayne shrugged, digging into the sticky, creamy, flan-like goodness of the dish.

"Do you ever miss it?" Penny asked. "… You know, wrestling?"

Wayne gave himself a moment. Not a day went by without somebody asking him that question. He pulled the Tupperware closer and took his time with his next couple bites- skimming along the surface of the dish to scoop you the right amount of rice and sauce to ensure he'd get the most out of his bites. "Honest truth?"

"It's why I'm asking aren't I?"

"I miss it," Wayne replied. "Miss it a lot."

"-But?"

"But" Wayne shrugged. "I don't miss the bullcrap that comes along with it."

"Are you happier?"

"I'd like to think so." Wayne nodded. "Why? Do you want out?"

"I'm thinking about it."

"What's going on?"

"I'm currently experiencing a quarter-life crisis and I've found myself questioning most of my life's choices."

"Do you feel like all the years you spent in the business were for nothing?"

"A little bit."

"That's not gonna go away," Wayne said.

"That's good to know," Penny said. "What do you think I should do about it?"

"Whatever you want."

"That's not very helpful."

"Cut the crap, Penny," Wayne said, stuffing his mouth. "You've already made up your mind. You just want me to tell you that it's okay- that you can do it."

"I guess." Penny sighed, crossing her arms together.

Wayne picked up his cigarette from the ashtray. "You'll be alright, Penny."

"You think so?"

"You're a big girl." Wayne smiled, taking a drag off his cigarette. "If you survived a hardcore match against Philip Schneider, you can survive anything."

She (almost) wanted to hug him.


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By her count, it had been roughly three months since she last smoked up. It wasn't like she was trying to cut down. There wasn't any moment when Penny thought to herself that maybe it was time to get off the pot; she just wasn't in the mood. She'd smoke Scarlett up, she'd smoke Josh up. But even around all that, she just wasn't in the mood to get high any more.
It didn't hit her the way it used to, and there were others things that seemed to fill the void. She didn't feel as empty as used to.

The night in Tempe drew on. There was no sleeping. She was a couple hours shy of Josh picking her up for the leg to California for SuperBrawl. From the way things were looking, it was probably going to be their last.
And so, Penny packed her clothes. She had on her ‘Totally 00's' playlist blasting through Spotify, a randomly assembled mix of songs from Staind, No Doubt, 311, and *NSync.

"I think I'm gonna get high." Penny murmured, as she rolled up her tights. "Well, maybe a little bit."

There was still a lot of weed inside her Sailor Moon lunchbox. It was a nice buffet of strains to satisfy her every mood, and enough to last her a good couple years if she wanted to be conservative.
She plucked out a loose nug from her "trail mix", an assortment of loose buds and dregs from old batches. Initially, she was going to have a joint, but it seemed like a waste. It had been three months, and a bowl was more than enough.

Penny sat down on her bed and looked at her suitcase, it was half-loaded. She was just about done. All she needed after this was a shower and she was set for the road. With her trusty, purple pipe, Portia, in her hand, Penny was all set.
But there was something amiss; something she just couldn't place…
With a flick of her Bic, she set the bowl a blaze, gently lighting her load until it was set enough for her to draw back with a mean, hearty toke.
She coughed a little as she exhaled. Looking down at the bowl in her hand, Penny smiled. It felt good, but this wasn't a feeling she missed at all. Like, if she wanted to, she could probably go through another three months without ever smoking up.

… "I knew you were gonna grow up."

Penny instantly recognized her voice. And the moment she felt that small bit of weight gently land on her shoulder, there was no denying who it was.

"Celeste Cuddlepunk."

"Penny Shannon." the pixie spoke. "It has certainly been awhile."

Penny held out her hand and with that, the pixie pushed herself off Penny's shoulder and set herself down upon Penny's index finger with her legs crossed. Not a lot had changed with the weed pixie since Penny saw her last- she was the same old Celeste Cuddlepunk from long ago.

"I didn't think I was ever going to see you again."

"You needed to grow up, Penny," Celeste said. "And from the looks of things, you seem to be doing just that."

"I wouldn't call it growing up."

"Oh, here we go."

"But I know I'm changing."

"Which is a good thing."

"If it is, then why is my career falling apart?" Penny asked. "It's like all I ever seem to do is make one bad decision after another and I hope I make it."

"Which, you do."

"Barely," Penny said. "It's like I've got this match with Dex coming up for SuperBrawl. I chose the stipulations and everything and I know that I can beat him, I know that I can totally destroy him but I can't help but feel like I got into everything so fast that I didn't have time to think things through."

"You do that, a lot."

"I know and I want to stop. It just stresses me out."

Celeste crossed her arms. "What do you think?"

"I think, I've got this match won."

"Then what's the problem?"

"I just wished I hadn't booked myself into this mess."

"Why?"

"Because I'm tired of wrestling", Penny replied. "And I want to stop."

"But?"

"I don't want to lose this match either," Penny replied. "I just want to destroy Dex and be done."

Celeste nodded. "Did you give any thought at all to what you're going to do after wrestling?"

"Not yet," Penny replied, taking the pipe to her lips. "But I've got enough to survive for awhile. I guess I'll figure it out when I get there."

"You will." Celeste smiled. "You're a crafty girl."

Penny smiled and then took a hit off her pipe.

Celeste pushed herself off Penny's finger and fluttered forward to give her a soft kiss on the cheek. "Hang tight, Penny Shannon."

Penny coughed as she exhaled.

"Everything is going to be alright."

And with those words, the pixie was gone no sooner than she had appeared. And though Penny wished that she could smoke more and just let herself drift off into Celeste's world(the Magick Kingdom and the Daydream Nation), she knew that it would also be a waste of where she was; where she needed to be.
It was just too…

"Irresponsible." Penny hushed. "And I can't do that anymore. At least everyday..."


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There was something about the way Josh Dean rolled into the front of Mama Sandoval's house in his rented Sedan that made Penny think of that Tom Petty song, "The Waiting".
She didn't get any sleep last night- she just wasn't in the mood for it. Like, as soon as Josh texted her that his plane landed in Phoenix, Penny jumped in the shower, grabbed her things and spent the better half of her morning waiting for him on the porch.

Vanessa kept her company. She was coming in from her morning run when Penny figured that she must've seen her standing out on the porch. She asked her what was up and went into her house. And then, not even five minutes later, she came back out to the porch with a cup of tea for the both of them.

They made simple small talk. It occurred to Penny, then, that in all the time she had spent back in Tempe in the last couple months, she never had the chance to properly hang out with Vanessa.
Penny just knew that their combination together would have made for a hell of an adventure.

"Maybe one day", Vanessa said, smiling, looking over her shoulder now as the Sedan came to a stop in front of them.

"When my life's a lot more stable?" Penny asked, curious as to how Vanessa was almost reading her mind.

"Which is the best time" Vanessa smiled. "It breaks the predictability."

Penny smiled back at Vanessa. "I'm counting on that."

"So am I."

"-Mornin' ladies," Josh spoke, rolling down the windows; shades over his eyes, looking like the coolest, corporate cat in the world.

"Bonjour, Josh Dean!" Vanessa waved, her shades resting over the thick nest of red curls that framed her hair. "Comment allez-vous?"

"Je vais bien merci." Josh replied. "Et toi, Madame McGurk?"

"Très bien merci, Monsieur Dean"

In the midst of all the French going on, Penny had grabbed her things and started making her way down the porch. Vanessa rose from her seat and grabbed Penny by the arm. "Good luck out there, Penny."

"Thanks."

"You better come back soon, okay?" Vanessa said, coming close as she pressed a kiss on Penny's cheek. "And bring Mary, we all want to meet her."

"I'm sure you guys do, but I don't know about Scarlett."

"She'll get over it. She just misses you." Vanessa smiled. "Now, go!"

Penny gave Vanessa a small wave and made a rush over to the Sedan, greeting Josh. "I didn't know you spoke French."

"Took a Berlitz course for a French-Canadian kid I signed a couple years ago," Josh replied. "Get in".

<***>

"Do me a favor?" Josh asked, keeping himself behind the wheel.

"Yeah, what's up?"

"Open the glove compartment," Josh replied, nodding. "There's something in there I want you to take a look at."

"It's not a gun, is it?"

They had pulled out of Phoenix a good twenty minutes ago and now, here they were out on the highway. If there was anything that always struck Penny whenever she was out on the road it was how fast things changed in such a short amount of time. Like, just a few months ago there were still remnants of small towns scattered along the way to Cali and now, they were all gone with construction work of all kinds tearing things down and building more on top of whatever was left.

Penny reached over and opened up the glove compartment.

"You see those papers?"

"Uh-huh", Penny murmured, pulling them out.

"Great," Josh said, stopping before a red light. "I want you to take a look through them."

"What is this?" Penny asked, rifling through the folder.

Josh rolled down the windows and lit a cigarette. "Your future."

Penny took a look at Josh for a moment before setting her eyes down on the folder. She didn't exactly have the attention to go through everything, but she knew that she was looking at a contract of some kind.

"What is this?"

"When you signed on with me, I gave you a promise that I was going to look after your future."

"Yeah, I remember."

"Now, I know that this match with Dex is going to be your last," Josh said. "Well, at least for the foreseeable future."

"I'm sorry."

"No, Penny", Josh said, lightly pressing on the gas now. "It's alright."

Penny kept the folder on her lap. "I just can't help but feel like I'm letting you down, you know?"

"You're not."

"-Josh."

"Well, maybe a little." Josh chuckled. "But that's not the point."

Penny couldn't deny that Josh seemed a lot lighter today. It was as if he had resigned himself and it left a calm over him that left him emotionally prepared for SuperBrawl and whatever was in store for him in its wake.
There was no denying that 2016 was hell for whatever was left of S.O.S. When it came to the WFWF, all Penny and Josh had we're each other. And while she knew he was a big boy who was more than capable of fighting his own battles, and then some, Penny still couldn't help but feel like she was being a crap for abandoning him.

"But I understand, Penny." Josh continued. "I've seen how you are backstage at the shows and it's very different from how you are when you're around Mary. That girl lights your fire and I couldn't be happier for you."

Penny felt her lips involuntarily curl to the side, smiling lightly.

"You're blushing."

"Get to the point, JD."

"You're heart isn't in wrestling."

"I'm sorry."

"I ain't holding it against you, Penny. I get it. Fact is, you're probably the smarter one between the two of us."

"I wished I had your willpower, though."

"I wished I had your self-preservation."

Penny held up the folder. "So, what's this then?"

"It's a job offer."

Penny looked through the folder. "Talent development and management?"

"I still believe that if it wasn't for your guidance, Scarlett Quinn would never have been WFWF World Champion."

"You've got a lot of faith in my abilities."

"Don't do that. Don't sell yourself short." Josh said. "It doesn't matter if you weren't able to do it for yourself, you still played a key role in developing a World Champion and I want to use that talent to help me cultivate more talent."

"So, you're offering me a job?"

"Yeah, I am," Josh said. "You'd be based in Atlanta-"

"I can move in with Mary."

"Exactly," Josh said. "More or less, the pay would be slightly less than what you're currently making here but it's stable and consistent. Anyway, we can always work something out. I want people who can grow with me, and I think you'd be a great fit."

"Josh, I don't know what to say. Thank you."

"You don't have to thank me." Josh smiled. "I'm just doing my job."

"No, you're not." Penny shot back. "You don't go this far for the other people you manage, so what gives?"

"Promise not to laugh?"

"It depends on what it is."

Josh pulled the car over to a clearing on the side of the highway. There was still a lot of traffic rushing past the both of them, but they weren't in any rush. They planned their movements early to keep themselves open to any shenanigans that would come their way.
He took a long drag off his cigarette as he resigned himself to a chuckle. Josh looked away from Penny and with a sigh, he said, "I just don't want to lose one of my best friends."

"Awwww, dude." Penny sighed.

"So, whatcha think?"

"Count me in, JD!", Penny shot out, unfastening her seat-belt as fast as she could so she could give Josh the biggest hug in the world.

Josh wrapped his arm around Penny's back and gave her a mighty hug, "Just promise me one thing."

Penny pulled back. "What's that?"

Josh dropped his forehead against Penny's and closed his eyes. "I want you to promise me that tomorrow night, you're kicking Dex's ass. Just ing do this for us. After everything the WFWF's done to the both of us, we deserve to let out a little aggression."

"Dude, of course!" Penny shot back. "I mean, yeah I didn't think that clearly when I booked myself into this but I did go into this knowing that I was going to give him a beating so severe, that it's going to change his life. Like, I don't doubt that he's going to try, it's just not going to be be enough. I mean, yeah there are stakes. But come on, it's just Dex! I've got this."

"Atta girl!"

Penny slipped on a pair of shades and sunk into her seat, feeling like the coolest, worst, most untouchable babe on the planet. "Shall we?"

Josh nodded and started up the car.




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Was it pricey? Yes, it was. Could Penny afford it? You bet your bass she could. Like in all the years she spent wrestling, she always tried to cheap out and cut costs wherever she could. But coming out of SuperBrawl, she figured: this was basically her retirement party, so why the hell not?!
So the moment her match was done, Penny took Mary and the two of them rushed into the Presidential Suite of the Sheraton Pasadena for two nights of non-stop shagging, eating, and napping. Basically Netflix and Chill, but with a budget!
After everything she had been through, Penny figured it was the perfect closer to her career.

"Huh," Penny muttered, lying on her back, with a satin sheet barely covering her waist.

"Hmm?" Mary murmured, lying on her side with arms and legs wrapped around Penny.

Clothes were scattered all over the floor; pillows and sheets all over the place, with two, three, maybe four trays from room service hanging all over the room. And to top that, Penny and Mary had their perfect soundtrack playing the in the back. There wasn't a lot that could top SuperBrawl, but this did. It totally did.

"I basically started my wrestling career because of a girl. And I'm ending it, at least for the time being, largely because of another one."

Mary's eyes and tongue popped out, feinting surprise and regret. "I'm sorry! I didn't mean to."

Penny laughed as she turned on her side to face Mary, pressed her hand gently over her chin as she gazed into her deep, brown eyes. "This was a long time coming anyway."

"I know it is."

"Hey, it worked out for the best," Penny said, kissing Mary before she turned back to her back. "I can finally rest and I've got enough in the bank to keep us living like queens for the rest of our lives."

"I'm still going to work, though." Mary cut in. "Like, I'm still keeping my career."

"Of course! That way we have more money!"

"Exactly!" Mary squealed, giggling as she held on to Penny tighter and kissed her. "Everything's transpiring as we designed"

… "We ain't getting' any younger. We ain't getting younger."
"Farther" was the next song that came up on their Spotify mix. The soft, seductive haze of indie pop/rock that once decorated the hollow spaces their suite was now replaced by the party anthem of the summer- a song, Penny knew, would be responsible for the spawning of thousands, perhaps millions, of douchey children that were set to inhabit the planet.

Mary grabbed her phone and was on the verge of skipping the song when Penny took her hand and stopped her.

"Keep it."

"Are you sure? I don't want this triggering you again."

"Yeah", Penny smiled, kissing Mary. "This is one our songs. Douche-bro or no douche-bro.".