Jack.
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Probably out Skating
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Post by Jack. on Jun 29, 2011 1:55:44 GMT -5
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r44gz96
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Post by r44gz96 on Jun 29, 2011 2:03:09 GMT -5
Trainer - Lewis Pokémon - Gastly Badges - None Hi, my names Lewis and I'm from Viridian City. I'm aged 15 and I'm ready to start my Pokemon Journey. When I was born, I was known for being the one thats quiet, but also known as the one that was soon to be the best trainer in the pokemon world. It all started on my birthday when my mother said the words 'your ready son, heres a gift' and she handed over two things ; a Pokedex and my first pokemon in its ball. I sent the pokemon out and it turned out to be the ghost/poison Pokemon.... Gastly!!
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jun 29, 2011 3:38:13 GMT -5
I'm LOVING the stories so far, especially the undercover Rocket agent!
So, here's my intro that I've had in the plans for the last few days. It's pretty darned late/early here, but I wanted to get this out here as a base. The second, most important part of the intro is in my mind, but I can't find the perfect words for it at this point. I convientently built myself an okay reason to stop.
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M
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Post by M on Jun 29, 2011 7:34:07 GMT -5
Trainer: M Age: 15 Location: Pallet Town Badges: 0 Pokémon Team: None Pokémon Caught:None Chapter 1 - Finally FifteenI woke up with something on top of me, licking my face and barking. I opened my eyes, of course, Professor Oaks Lillipup, Jackie. She was very energetic, always jumping around putting a smile on my face. I rubbed my eyes a couple times and saw Professor Oak at the door chuckling while drinking his green tea. Jackie did a little back flip off my bed (something that she loved doing) and skipped over to him. I rubbed my eyes another couple of times while Professor Oak took another mouthful of his drink.
"Ahhhhhh! Nothing like a green tea in the morning!" He announced. "Yeah!" I replied, even though i can't stand the stuff. "Do you notice anything M?" He asked. "Yeah, It's my birthday that means i ca-" He cut me off "No, no, no, not that." "Then what?" I asked. He pointed to my bed side table. Next to me was a small ball wrapped in gift paper with Bulbasaurs, Squirtles and Charmanders on it. Feeling like a Happiny i dove straight into it, paper flying everywhere, i pulled off the final small piece to revile a Pokeball. "Wow" Not believing this was finally happening. I picked it up, "Woah, lighter than i thought!" I said, Professor Oak grinned.
"I've waited a long time for this! GO POKEBALL!" I threw it out and waited to see what was inside, to see who my new friend ally is....
Nothing.
My HP... Happiness Points when to 0. I think i fainted.
Professor Oak was cracking up laughing. "Did you think i'd just give you a Pokemon?" He asked. "Yes." I growled. "Haha!" He cracked up again, but then he got serious. "M, i see something in you that i haven't seen in any other trainer, even my grandson." That last comment made me feel better, he continued. "This Pokeball is my present to you, i want you, to catch your first ever Pokemon." I was shocked, many new trainers have received their first Pokemon from Professor Oak, but never he says go catch it yourself. "Now get some clothes on and come down stairs, i have a few more things i want to give you" I quickly threw on my usual clothes, tied my hair back, threw my hat on and ran downstairs.
Professor Oak was standing at the table and handed me two things...
A bag with various items; a few Pokeballs, Potions, a Paralyze Heal, an Antidote and an Awakening. He also gave me a.. Pokedex, i had no idea what it was but Professor Oak called it a high tech encyclopedia that registers Pokemon data. "I want you to try to see as many Pokemon as you possibly can. If this was around when i was your age i would be out and about trying to get all 649!"
I quickly drunk a glass of Moo Moo Milk and grabbed a few Oran berries in case i got hungry. As i was walking to the door Professor Oak was asking a few final questions, "Do you have your Pokedex?" "Yes" "Spare clothes?" "Uhh-haaa" "Your balls?" Yeah i also giggled when he said that. "Um, Yeah." We were a few steps away from the door when someone can bursting in.
It was Blue!
Blue had been my rival since as long as i can remember. But... but... he would always win, i don't think i have ever beaten him. Blue was cocky and arrogant, a person who i despise and don't want to be around.
As he stepped in the door he threw his hair back and said, "Gramps! Sorry i'm late, i decided to get some extra training in while coming back down from Pewter city, i'm so ready to take on that leader, whats his name? Agnus? Who cares!" Professor Oak replied "I believe it's Angus, he uses fire types, hey, have you caught any new Pokemon for your team?" "Na! Still just me and Eevee. How are all the Pokemon i sent you doing?" Blue asked "All of them are doing great, i bet Eevee is more than ready to take on the gym, oh yes! Let me get the things i need you to drop off!" Professor Oak wandered off into his office. "Wow Blue, what Pokemon have you caught?" I asked. He smirked and sat down cross legged. "Well! On my way to Viridian city i caught a few generic bird Pokemon, a Rattata.. or two.. and i think a few Bidoofs, man, they get annoying. I forgot to buy Repels for Viridian forest, so i ran into heaps of bug Pokemon, i swear i got 10 Wurmples, and some Metapods, Caterpies, all those crappy bug types. Oh and i can't forget my good ol buddy, Eevee." I stood there shocked. "So how many did you get in total?" "Oh, over 30 something" He replied. Now i was even more shocked, i was just speechless. "Hey want to see Eevee?" Blue asked. Now i'm really confused, I've never seen Blue this talkative, something is up... "Oh, uhh, yeah!" I replied. Blue pulled out his Pokeball. "Go! Eevee!"
Out popped a cute little Eevee, but this one was different, it didn't look like a normal playful Eevee, it looks much stronger and more determined. Now i know why Blue was acting like this, he wanted to show off... Professor Oak came out of his Office holding some papers, "Now blue i ne-" He stopped, "Wow, your Eevee looks amazing, very well trained, it's muscles are much bigger since i first gave it to you. Anyway, these files are about a study on a legendary Pokemon from the Unova region, Kyurem! Professor Carolina is visiting Bill on Route 25 in the next few weeks so it is important you get these to him!" I was interested in this but i decided to keep out of it. Blue seemed to not listen to Professor Oak and just shove the pages into his bag.
We all stepped outside and said our goodbyes to Professor Oak. I started walking ahead. As i was walking i overheard Professor Oak talking to Blue "You treat M nicely, he has had a hard life." "Yeah yeah gramps." Blue replied. "I know you can be a mature person, treat him like he is your student." "Eh, he isn't going to make it far." Blue barked "Hmm, you should watch your back, i know he has something in him." That made me smile.
I looked back at Professor Oak and waved. Blue eventually caught up. "You excited?" he asked, i smiled. "Yeah." I was happy, very happy, it's time to take the steps into my new life.
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Post by Ben - #6 Munchie on Jun 29, 2011 9:52:03 GMT -5
Loving these so far guys I have my intro and part 2 typed on my phone, A I did them during maths
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Post by Ben - #6 Munchie on Jun 29, 2011 10:03:17 GMT -5
Trainer - Ben Pokémon Team - N/A Badges - None Pokémon Caught - None Location - Pallet Town As the sun rose on a beautiful day in the serene town of Pallet, in the Kanto Region, one young boy was about to start his ultimate quest. To become a Pokémon Master!
*buzz* *buzz*
As the Voltorb alarm clock went off, Ben jumped out of his bed as fast as he could.
"Today is the day, the day I get my first Pokémon!"
Ben jumped in the shower and then got changed and ran for the kitchen.
"Mum, mum, it's time! I can finally get my first Pokémon!"
Ben's mum was in the kitchen cooking his breakfast when she hears his shouting.
"Hey honey, you sure are excited. Prof. Oak stopped by earlier to say he has your Pokémon waiting in the lab for you. You can go by after breakfast and pick it up."
Ben's jaw drops as he realises he can finally start his ultimate journey.
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Jack.
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Post by Jack. on Jun 29, 2011 10:27:37 GMT -5
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Jack.
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Probably out Skating
Joined on: Feb 23, 2009 11:06:38 GMT -5
Posts: 4,907
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Post by Jack. on Jun 29, 2011 10:33:41 GMT -5
Trainer Name: Jack Age: 14 Current Team:Current Location: On the way to Viridian City Gym Badges Obtained: N/A
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r44gz96
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Post by r44gz96 on Jun 29, 2011 10:42:35 GMT -5
Something to ask, what city's are the gym's in?
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Post by Ben - #6 Munchie on Jun 29, 2011 10:45:44 GMT -5
From page 1 Lewis 1. Angus, You'll be burned alive, 2 pokemon - Pewter City 2. iMMi, He will shock you, 3 pokemon - Cerulean City 3. Diego, He'll deliver unto you some psychic fury, 3 pokemon - Vermillion City 4. Silva, These plants are sharper than they appear, 3 pokemon - Celadon City 5. James, Feel the wrath of his normalcy, 4 pokemon - Fuchsia City 6. LLLBD, He's buggin' out for a reason, 4 pokemon - Saffron City 7. Honkey, He'll leave you scared to your core, 5 pokemon - Cinnabar Island 8. Jack, He'll drown you with his skill, 6 pokemon - Viridian City
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jun 29, 2011 10:49:01 GMT -5
Trainer name: Angus Age- 16 Current team- N/A Current Location- Pallet Town Badges- none Other caught pokemon- none Chapter 1: The Charm of CharmanderMy eyes begin to open. I hear the sound getting louder. "I want to be, the very best... Like no one ever waaassss" Its my alarm clock. As I hit the snooze button and am about to regain my sleep, I remember; This is not a normal day. This was the day my parents finally said I could live my dream. After years of waiting this was my chance. Today I get to become a Pokemon trainer! All this thinking made me forget what time it is. "What time is it? EIGHT A`CLOCK!" I hurry down the stairs seeing my parents waiting, I don't have time for breakfast today. I hug my mother, shake my fathers hand, and run out the door. Professor Oaks lab is just a few minutes away by foot. I can still make it in time for his starter giveaway. After making there just in time I see there is a long line of kids. Everyone wants to get their starter Pokemon. Since I am way taller than everyone else in line, professor Oak notices me immediately. "Well look what we have here kids, it looks like someone was a little late on beginning their Pokemon journey" The kids laugh. Feeling embarrassed, my head lowers. After about an hour, the line shortens. I'm up next. "So why are you so late anyway? You seem about 16 years old" Says Oak. "My parents" I respond. "Ahhh I understand, well I hope you know I was only joking around with you earlier. Its nice to see someone more mature beginning their Pokemon journey. Anyway we still have some starters left, I think about one of each." "Squirtle, Charmander, and Bulbasaur?" I ask. "Yes" Said Oak. So which one would you like? Then I realized something, I never even thought about which one I was gonna pick! I have been waiting my whole life for this and yet I have NO clue what starter to choose! Without realizing it I must have been lost in my thought for awhile as Oak now said: "Well, how about I just let you see them in person" With that the pokeballs opened! Squirtle, the water type! Charmander, the fire type! Bulbasaur, the grass type! With that I looked at each Pokemon. For some reason I was first drawn to the tail of Charmander. Like moths to a flame I was memorized by this Pokemon. I couldn't explain why I was always interested by fire, I just was. For some reason it seemed Charmander was looking at me the same way. I then looked at the other Pokemon. Squirtle seemed bored with me, almost expecting something better. Bulbasaur smiled at me, and then gave me a vine whip! "OUCH!" I said "I am so sorry" Said Oak. Usually Bulbsaur doesn't do that. How about you pick this squirtle?" "What about Charmander?" I asked. "Well, if you didn't like Bulbasaurs attitude, your sure not gonna like Charmander. He usually is aggressive towards the kids. Although, some kids can be a little rough with him sometimes, so that would explain why, haha" "Well he seems fine to me" I said. "So you are choosing him? "Yes" At that moment the professor got a phone call. I could only hear what he was saying. "Hello?" "Yes" "Of course" "...." "They cant do that" "No" "A Pokemon like that is too dangerous to catch!" "Only a trainer with heart can tame that! And Team Rocket has no heart!" "......." "Well, I don't know what to do...." "Fine." "Goodbye" The mood of Professor Oak seemed to get sadder as the call went on. "....I...uh...Sorry about that. So what was your name again?" "Angus" "Alright, so um... heres your Charmander. And your pokedex. And here are some pokeballs to take with you. Take care." "Thank you" I left. After walking a few steps outside Professor Oak ran outside after me. "Angus?" "Yes" "..... I want to ask you something." ".....Okay" "When you get your eighth badge, I want you to see me. Right away." "Alright" "After seeing how well you bonded with the fire type, you might be the..... nevermind. Just see me after you get that badge. "Okay" I was very confused on what that was about. Why did he want me to see him again? What was he gonna say I could be? And what was his phone call about? I had many questions but no time to find out. I looked at my Pokeball. CHARMANDER! I CHOOSE YOU!
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M
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Post by M on Jun 29, 2011 10:58:45 GMT -5
^ Nice start, i really want to know about those weird things Oak said.
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Post by Ben - #6 Munchie on Jun 29, 2011 11:08:22 GMT -5
Trainer - Ben Pokémon Team - N/A Badges - None Pokémon Caught - None Location - Pallet Town Ben finishes his breakfast consisting of Chari-Flakes and Moo Moo milk.
"Well mum, I'm off to Prof. Oak's lab to pick up my very first Pokémon!"
Ben's mum looks like she is about to cry, her 10 year old son is finally going on his own adventure, just like she did as a young child.
"Ben, before you go, please take these."
She hands him some potions and antidotes.
"Thanks mum, I won't let you down."
Ben grabs his lucky cap and heads for the lab.
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r44gz96
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Joined on: Mar 8, 2009 10:42:07 GMT -5
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Post by r44gz96 on Jun 29, 2011 11:11:13 GMT -5
Chapter 2
After years and years of waiting to get my first Pokemon, I finally got it..In the form of a Gastly. It wasn't one that I was expecting to be given but one that I will forever keep in my heart. As soon as I'd taken a huge look at my Gastly I realized it was the one for me, and no-one I REPEAT no-one would ever take that away from it or it away from me.
A few hours later I collected some other things from my Mother like a few potions,antidotes and pokeballs. I was then finally ready to set off on the best journey of my life.
As I set off out of the house, I came across a Pokemon, it looked awesome! It looked like a little fire pig, and I was determined to capture it. But first I HAD to get the data for it in my shining, metallic , blue Pokedex. It turned out it was a Pokemon that had never been seen outside of another region called Unova, it was a....TEPIG!!
After getting the data for it in my pokedex, I sent out my Gastly. After sending out my Gastly, the Tepig quickly attacked him. My Gastly returned the favour by getting a few 'lick' attacks in on the Tepig then using hypnosis sending it quietly to sleep.
Without thinking about it, I threw a Pokeball. It rocked from side to side, and eventually let out a clicking noise signaling that I'd finally caught the pokemon. I let out a sigh of excitement being proud that I'd caught my first ever Pokemon, without help! A few seconds later, I recieve a call from my mother, saying this, 'I have something back here that may change your life in many of ways' I reply 'I'll be straight home.' and put the phone down without saying anything other than that..
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Post by Ace Bennett on Jun 29, 2011 12:12:49 GMT -5
Trainer Name: Ace Age: 18 Current Location: Pallet Town Current Team: N/A Badges Earned: N/AEntry Number 2: Make it DoubleI had finally made it to Pallet Town, and my Super Nerd disguise had worked like a charm. Usually if I walk into a town with Team Rocket gear on, people cower in fear towards me and avoid me at all costs. People respected me, and I liked it. But now, I was just a normal person, and not a single soul in sight seemed to give me as much as a passing glance. I can't wait to get this stupid disguise off. Pallet Town seemed to not be too busy today. I guess all the trainers who wanted to get new Pokemon this year had already gotten them. Real shame too, I would've enjoyed a good battle to teach these children a lesson. Oh well, there's more important things at hand. I check my pocket for the flash drive that my father gave me and enter Professor Oak's lab. If only they knew who I was, then they'd be real afraid. Oak calls me into his office, welcoming me to Pallet Town. "Hello! I am Professor Oak! I assume you are here to get your new Pokemon? May I see your trainer certificate?"I hand Oak the bootleg trainer certificate, complete with picture of me in my disguise. He scans over it for a second, before continuing his conversation with me. "Elmer, huh. Haven't heard that name in a while. Well Elmer, you're in luck, I still have an extra of each of the three Kanto starters, Bulbasaur, Squirtle, and Charmander, which would you like."He holds up the three Pokeballs in his hands. This won't do. I need to get him away from his computer for like 20 seconds so I can get all of the data off of his computer. Thinking on my feet, I get an idea. "Actually Professor, I was hoping that I was going to be able to get a Johto Pokemon. My parents actually told me to get a Johto Pokemon....so if you have any extra Johto Pokemon in storage or something, that would be great.""I suppose I can check for you, Elmer."Oak gets up and leaves his office. Upon hearing the 'click' of the door closing, I get up and attach my flash drive to the USB port of Oak's computer. Within 20 seconds, I hear a beeping noise emit from the flash drive, saying that it has done its job. I quickly remove the flash drive and sit down, in the same position I was in before Oak left. As if on cue, Oak reentered the room just after I had finished. "Your in luck Elmer, I have an extra of all three Johto starters, Cyndaquil, Totodile, and Chikorita. And if those don't fit your fancy, which I don't see how they wouldn't, we also have a huge surplus of Houndours. Team Rocket had been breeding these poor things at an alarming rate, just to raise numbers within their army. We were able to save these poor Pokemon from those savages. What's your choice?"So that's where all of our Houndour ended up. We had raised them to be stronger than your average low level Pokemon, specialized breeding had become one of Team Rocket's specialties over the years. Knowing this, I knew exactly what Pokemon I wanted. "I'll actually take a Houndour."Surprised by my pick, Oak flinches for a second. He regains composure and hands me the Pokeball, which has Houndour in it. "Here you are Elmer. Take good care of Houndour. Wouldn't want him ending up back into the hands of Team Rocket.""Of course not."Oak waves at me as I exit the Pokemon Lab. That was easier than I thought. I insert the flash drive into my specially designed, Rocket Admin watch. All of the contents of the watch poured into my watch, and I could see everything. Along with every single page in the Pokedex that Oak has collected from his trainers over the years, there was a map of the Kanto region and all of the goings ons there for the next 5 years. I was shocked to see some of the things. Team Rocket will benefit greatly from this. Once again, an idea pops into my mind. There's no way dad will let me help with some of these things. I'll have to prove I'm capable of doing evil on my own before going home. I guess I'll take the scenic route.
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Post by Ben - #6 Munchie on Jun 29, 2011 12:49:35 GMT -5
LOVE IT ACE!
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Post by Ben - #6 Munchie on Jun 29, 2011 13:44:40 GMT -5
Location - Prof. Oak's Lab Ben sets off to the lab, but is stopped by a strange duo.
"Quick Mike, we can't be seen by anyone, especially considering what we have just done"
The two run off with two sacks and Ben hears sirens in the distance, he knows this can't be good. Officer Jenny approaches him.
"Excuse me boy, have you saw these two?"
She holds a mugshot of the two people Ben had just saw run away.
"Yes I have, they ran off towards Viridian City with a two sacks."
Officer Jenny repeats what Ben had just said over her walkie talkie.
"Thank you, that was a great help."
Officer Jenny rushes off towards Viridian City with her trusty Growlithe.
Ben, still confused by what has just happened continues to Prof. Oak's lab. When he reaches the lab, it becomes apparent what has happened. Ben runs towards the lab to see Oak standing outside with another young boy.
"This is terrible Gary. What will we do now? All the Pokémon have been stolen." Said Oak.
Ben only catches the end of the sentence and begins to worry.
"Excuse me, Prof. Oak? I overheard you saying all the Pokémon have been stolen. Does that mean I can't get my first Pokémon?"
Oak and Gary turn around to see Ben standing there, shaking a little.
"Oh, you must be Ben. Allow me to introduce myself. I am Prof. Oak, the resident Prof. in Pallet Town. I'm sorry, the Pokémon I had ready for you have been stolen by two grunts working for the evil Team Rocket. They are a ruthless team of thieves and will stop at nothing to steal all the Pokémon they can."
Ben looks at Oak, his heart sinks as he now realises he can't begin his journey.
"Oh, that is awful Mr Oak. Do you know if they will be caught by Officer Jenny, or are they sneaky as well as ruthless?"
Gary intervenes.
"Look kid, the Pokémon are gone, so stop trying to beg for scraps and accept that I got the last of what Oak had before the grunts came. I chose this amazing Pokémon."
Gary throws his Pokéball and out pops his newest companion.
"Meet my new Sandshrew. He is the best ground type Pokémon you will ever see."
Ben looks at Sandshrew with great awe. He can't believe Gary got the lat Pokémon.
"Now, hold on a minute Gary, you didn't get the last Pokémon. I actually have one left that I got in yesterday, but it hasn't been trained yet, and is a little hostile towards strangers. I can let you meet him if you want Ben?"
Ben jumps at the chance.
"YES, YES please Mr Oak."
Oak grabs the Poké Ball out of his lab jacket and throws it.
Out pops an Elekid.
"Wow, an Elekid. Why didn't I get him instead of Sandshrew?"
Oak lets Elekid wander about. Elekid stops and looks at Ben. Elekid raises his hand towards Ben. Ben grabs Elekid's hand and Elekid lightly shocks Ben.
"Ouch!" Shouts Ben.
Oak chuckles and returns Elekid to the Poké Ball.
"So Ben, he seems to like you. How would you like this Elekid to be your first ever Pokémon?"
Ben pauses for a second before shouting
"YES!"
Oak smiles and hands the Poké Ball to Ben.
"Now, you better take care of this Elekid, Ben. Pokémon are extremely fragile creatures, and should be cared for and loved forever."
Ben, still gazing at the Poké Ball, knows that his journey has officially begun.
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Post by Deleted on Jun 29, 2011 14:16:09 GMT -5
Absolutely love Ace's character, and iMMigrant, the two robbers aspect of your story sound pretty darned.... INTENSE. And Angus, I like how it seems like Team Rocket put a hit out on Oak or something, lol. Hope he doesn't get merc'd before you get the 8th badge I really like the any Pokemon rule. We're seeing some pretty cool combinations (Starly and Ghastly at the start of Kanto? Awesome). This whole thing is turning out great. As long as I have enough time to make my stories (have some time restrains) I should be able to contriubte in positive fashion. Hopefully. Anyways, here's prestory part 2:
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r44gz96
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Joined on: Mar 8, 2009 10:42:07 GMT -5
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Post by r44gz96 on Jun 29, 2011 14:30:22 GMT -5
I'm gonna post another on Friday , it will be good..PROMISE!
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Jack.
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Post by Jack. on Jun 29, 2011 14:39:32 GMT -5
MASS REPLY TIME:
First of all, I think you should all be updating your characters on the first page like I have, if you look at my first post.
Silva: Good backstory though it didn't seem totally clear. I'd like to know MORE about your sister who is a breeder, why won't she let you know what's in it? Eevee is a great staring Pokemon since there are alot of things you can do with it and a lot of directions you can go.
Angus: Great start, very well written and I love the description. It feels like you are in a world where Humans and Pokemon help eachother. I love your idea of having firemen and their squirtle. You covered quite a few things, like reasons why you are only starting at 18. I like how you talked about fire and I'm guessing Charmander will be your choice. I'm looking forward too more.
Chapter 1, Good start there but it reminds me of the show with you being late and all. No surprise for me if you pick Charmander since he's mentioned greatly. I laughed at the Bulbasaur bit. Good choice in Charmander but a very interesting follow up phonecall, I'd like to know what that's all about. It'll be a while but I'm looking forward to you gaining your eigth badge. Good job.
Ace: VERY good first paragraph, very gripping and completely different to everyone elses. Your story will probably come out of this as being the most memorable, but I'm not putting down the others. Your explanations are very good, there aren't many things I am still wondering in terms of backstory. This is all very good stuff man, good ending too with the disguise. Your second installment really set up your story for when Oak finds out what's going on. I liked the way you distracted Oak and Houndour is a very nice choice for a starter, especially for team rocket. I liked the sneakiness and how it seemed very intense while reading. I liked the ending paragraph, alot. It was very mischevious.
M: Your introduction was pretty good, I described you as a loner, someone who didn't even know their own birthday, their own age. I'm looking forward to finding out about your parents, you relevance to Prof. Oak among other things. Good, unique start.
Alright, next update from you. Good start, I see your living with Oak, so I guess he's your 'family'? The empty Pokeball was definitely a surprise. I'm intrigued to find out why you keep crossing out the word friend, it's an interesting addition. I like that your not starting with a Pokemon as a gift, I was thinking about doing that. Moo Moo Milk always adds to a write up. I like how your portaying Blue as a cocky SOB, I think it'll come back to bite him in the ass. Good start man.
Lewis: A very mysterious start, there isn't alot too it so it's hard too comment on, I'd like too know more. Why did you get a Ghastly, why did you start at 15? I'm thinking this will be good but needs more explaining. It's a bit strange that you just happened to stumble apon a Tepig, wish there was some more description in there and you catching it straight away I'm not a huge fan of, it just seemed abit sudden and random. I'd love to see what your mother has got you. I think you have the most unique team so far though.
James: I'm interested in your starting in a completely different place too Pallet Town or Viridian City. VERY good start and most definitely the most intriguing yet, I like how you differ from the regular birthday scenario (which admittadley I followed too) and went with your own, the description really added to it and I liked the speech, it seemed very true to life. Good job, I'm very excited to read on.
Ben: I read these earlier, as I told you. I like the small references with the Voltorb clock. Not much to comment on so far.
Second Moo Moo Milk reference in this thread, it boosts your points with me, again, not alot to comment on, some added emotion, all good.
This is your best one yet, I love Sandshrew but he doesn't seem evil enough, maybe that will be part of the story. I like how you added mystery with the theives. Elekid is a nice starter, it seems like someone who could be just laying around, good luck with him, I assume you'll make him Pikachuish. Good entry.
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