Devilkiller
Main Eventer
WFWF. Go see about it.
Joined on: Mar 17, 2012 16:49:19 GMT -5
Posts: 1,868
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Post by Devilkiller on Jun 15, 2013 14:48:26 GMT -5
rhcwfanasty.webs.com/weekly-showsYou must copy and paste the link, I'm sorry for the inconvenience. I'll do it the old fashion way then Please leave a comment, they are always appreciated! Thanks guys!
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Devilkiller
Main Eventer
WFWF. Go see about it.
Joined on: Mar 17, 2012 16:49:19 GMT -5
Posts: 1,868
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Post by Devilkiller on Jun 17, 2013 2:42:14 GMT -5
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Post by WCWA Online on Jul 12, 2013 12:46:53 GMT -5
I'd like to point out that I think it's amusing that this is 3/30/13, posted 6/15/13. When I started writing 2006 WCWA.. IT REALLY WAS 2006. Actually think I started dating in 2005 and have made it to 2006.. Guess it could be worse. Tenn is writing CWF in 1999.. and it started as a present day series as well. So as long as I'm not still in 2006 WCWA in 2020, I'm doing okay. I mentioned to you on AIM that something is y with your link, so hopefully you can get whatever is up with it fixed, and I can edit this to a full review
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Devilkiller
Main Eventer
WFWF. Go see about it.
Joined on: Mar 17, 2012 16:49:19 GMT -5
Posts: 1,868
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Post by Devilkiller on Jul 12, 2013 13:08:55 GMT -5
Yeah, well when I started it was October, I didn't want to be in like December now, so when I reset I started on 3 something. So yes it is out dated. Lol. I get the y link fixed. Thanks!
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Post by ICW on Jul 15, 2013 13:06:04 GMT -5
I thought it would be more beneficial if I critiqued your style rather than this particular episode. In many ways you remind me a lot of myself when I first started booking and I think you have loads of potential to one day be an extremely good fantasy booker.
It's pretty obvious you seem to be a big fan of high flying wrestling (having both the Cruiserweight and X-Division titles) and you have a good enough roster to justify both titles being active within your federation.
Your match writing needs a little bit more polish. The opener between AJ and The Miz was decent but could've been better if you broken up some of the paragraphs.
You have the potential. This show was decent but you lack the polish more experienced bookers have (which is completely understandable since, ya know, you're new to this.)
Keep going at it.
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Post by WCWA Online on Jul 17, 2013 9:54:37 GMT -5
after a number of false starts and an inability to get Freewebs to correctly load, it's finally loaded, so here goes my review;
I know you've got a lot of plans for London and Kendrick and I like how it's a big deal. It puts the Cruiserweight title on the same level as the Heavyweight title, just for smaller guys. It's something I've done myself. The WCWA Junior Heavyweight title has had as many or more memorable matches and moments as the Heavyweight title.
I'll say, you could really improve by clarifying who you're talking about more. Make sure the first time you're introducing someone on a show, you're introducing them by first and last name and always go back to that a few times. And in most cases, refer to people by their last name as a short name rather than the first. Despite having just read the teaser for AJ Styles, I couldn't help but think about AJ Lee when I read just "AJ". The opener was decent. Nothing to call home about, but good.
Not liking the Bubba Dudley vignette. He's someone I'm completely over. I consider him one of the worst parts of TNA, and that says something because TNA has a lot of pretty awful parts.. I just don't think that a tag team comedy guy, re-invented as a top heel tag team guy, morphed to a "cool" tag team guy in another fed can really become a top heel singles guy after all of these years. The time for Bubba Dudley to be a singles star was 2002/2003, not 2013. And when he dropped Triple H, that was done away with. He's been around for almost 20 years now. it's time to retire, not be a top star reinvented.
Not feeling the RVD promo. It didn't strike me as RVD.
You're pushing Wade Barrett hard. I like it. He could potentially be a top guy for you.
I like the music video vignette a lot. If you can do something similar when PPVs come around, you'll nail that big fight feel.
Mysterio and Kendrick was a good match, but it goes back to the first name basis thing. It just doesn't flow right. It comes off as awkward. Last names short, first and last names long, and bounce back and forth.
I feel like Van Dam and Hardy got cut short. It seemed like it was done when it was just picking up steam.
London & Lethal worked. It certainly served it's purpose. The one thing I'd suggest is slowing down. Work on your match psychology. You seem to rush through matches, not in a physical writing speed, but in the pacing. Don't be afraid to take a couple sentences to establish who is the babyface, who is the heel.. Let the heel get some heat.
I think I would've finished with London and Lethal as the end segment. The segment with Michaels & Dreamer and such really didn't work as the closing segment.
You are improving a lot as a writer. I'd suggest looking over your entire show and make sure everything makes sense where it's positioned, that all the right people are getting face time, work on your pacing and psychology.. And just continue to polish. You're improving a lot which is a good thing, and you'll only continue to improve as time goes on
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slowgraffiti
Superstar
Joined on: Sept 15, 2011 10:26:36 GMT -5
Posts: 751
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Post by slowgraffiti on Jul 26, 2013 11:12:39 GMT -5
The link worked fine for me just clicking it, so I guess it's maybe been fixed since you initially posted it? Anyways...
- The London/Kendrick feud has great potential, promo wise and for the matches that those two could have. The promo made me interested, so it did its job.
- Enjoyed the Miz/AJ match a lot, probably one of the better matches I've read from yourself. Though it will always seem strange to have Miz as a smiley, high fivey face, it's interesting to see him used in a different way.
- Like J, the video package for Bubba didn't really engage with me at all. I feel like it's a spot that could be used with a much better character writing and entertainment wise, he's always seemed really 2-D to me.
- Much like Miz being a happy clappy face, it's strange to see AJ just being an bunghole heel, it's been a lot of years since I saw him do that/ I do like how you're subverting the normal roles people play, makes things a little more interesting.
- Dominant win from Wade Barrett. He's a guy I've always liked to watch, so it's good to see him get a good push.
- Surprised to see Rey win, something told me Kendrick would take the win, but I guess it's good to be wrong sometimes. It's an interesting setup, having both the X Division and Cruiser titles, would be cool to see a champion vs champion feud somepoint down the line.
- I must admit, I had a laugh at seeing Hardy get "jobber entrance-d". Decent match, though I feel the promo after was maybe a bit too long winded to fit with RVD's character, he's usually a bit more succinct. Regardless, there's good potential between him and AJ for their feud.
- A lot of pinfalls in this match, something that just stuck in my mind after reading it. I did enjoy it, and I think it's cool to have it as the main event. Ladder match should be good, especially between London and Kendrick, plenty of scope for insane stunts and bumps.
- I'll agree with J again - would definitely have had this final segment before the main event. It seems like the kind of thing that would just kill a crowd, whereas London was a great ending.
I must say though, even this is a massive improvement from the previous show. You're getting more into the mindset of the guys, and writing better as a result. Hopefully you can keep progressing, because i'm starting to enjoy the feud you're building.
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Post by WCWA Online on Jul 26, 2013 15:07:42 GMT -5
The link worked fine for me just clicking it, so I guess it's maybe been fixed since you initially posted it? Anyways... turns out I was having an issue with my cookies over all. got much worse after this before I fixed the issue. My bad
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