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Post by Deleted on Apr 23, 2016 11:46:50 GMT -5
January 2nd, 2016, from fecund Reseda, CA
"Ladies and gentlemen, welcome back to Reseda, California, for the first time in 2016, as we return with Pro Wrestling Guerilla Lëmmy! This show is of course dedicated to the memory of the legendary Lemmy Kilmister, who sadly passed away just a few days ago. I am Excalibur, joined at the commentary booth shaped like a table by my good friend and PWG senior official, Mr. Rick Knox, as we are set to kick things off with Chuck Taylor taking on Andrew Everett".
Chuck Taylor vs Andrew Everett After Angelo Trinidad introduced both men, Taylor and Andrews started circling each other, and after they finally locked up, Taylor used his size advantage to throw Everett away, before yelling "Oh, yeah, baby, Chuckie T's a power guy now!". Following that, Everett used his speed to run rings around Chuck Taylor, avoiding "The Kentucky Gentleman"'s every attack and taking control of the match after a dropkick followed by a hammerlock. As Everett wrenched on the hammerlock, Taylor began to squeal more and more, but eventually rolled Everett over his shoulder and locking in a rear chinlock. "You know, we bought the pace up back there, yeah, we bought him up, but now we're gonna bring him down, bring him down, ha!", yelled Taylor, as he maintained his chinlock. Everett started to make a base again, jumped back up to his feet, and then caught Taylor with a stiff kick to the gut followed by an Enzuiguri, sending Chuck out of the ring. Everett used the opportunity to go flying over the top with a topé con hilo, and then bought Taylor back in and continued to go to work on him, hitting him with moves like a standing shooting star, hurricanrana, reverse DDT and an attempted 450, but Taylor was able to move out of the way before Andrew could connect, leaving the youngster to hit nothing but canvas. Taylor wasted no time in lifting Everett up and hitting the Awful Waffle, but instead of going for a cover, Taylor climbed to the top rope and proclaimed "I've never missed a moonsault in my entire life!", before going for a moonsault.. and missing it. Taylor pulled his tights forward and took a look down after he hit the mat, and the look on his face gave everybody some indication that he may have had a mess down there. Everett got back up and spiked Chuck on his head with a babyrana, and tried to follow it up, but Chuck fought back and hit him with a Jackknife Powerbomb, and yelled "THAT ONE WAS FOR YOU BIG KEV, I LOVE YOU", after it. Taylor picked Everett up again and hit him with Sole Food, followed by another Awful Waffle for the pin and the win. Chuck Taylor def. Andrew Everett via Awful Waffle (9:06)
Sami Callihan vs Marty Scurll Scurll stood in the centre ring, as the fans chanted "you look stupid" at him. Scurll responded by yelling "If you think I look stupid, look at this bloke!". Callihan responded to that by rocking Scurll with a lariat, and the match was underway. Sami didn't let up, and immediately threw "The Villain" with a deadlift Saito Suplex, as, Scurll moved into the corner, a move he would regret, as Callihan booted him right across the face with the low bicycle boot. Scurll rolled out of the ring, and Callihan followed him, sending Marty crashing into a row of chairs, before body slamming him on the floor and crashing down with a senton. Scurll writhed in pain, as Sami lined him up against the corner post and went for a right hand, but Scurll ducked, and Sami punched the ring post at full force, smashing his fist against it. Sami grabbed a hold of it immediately, and Scurll took advantage of that one moment, pulling Callihan up onto the apron and dropping him on it with a back suplex. Scurll broke Rick Knox's 20 count, and then stayed in the ring to take a little while to recover. When Callihan rolled back in, Scurll stomped away at him, unrelenting, kicking him in the kidneys and spine, doing further damage to the back. Scurll then held Sami by the hair, and viciously threw him into the turnbuckles head and neck first, causing a whiplash effect and allowing him to slow Callihan's pace down and bring the match to his speed. Scurll went down onto the mat and took control of Callihan for a long time, continuing to work the back with a body scissors, gutwrench suplex, and a large variety of moves, doing as much damage to Sami as possible, but "The Living Death Machine" wasn't going to stay down that easily, and started to fight back, with stiff forearms to the face of Marty and a bicycle kick followed up with a sitout powerbomb, but only got a two count as Scurll kicked out. Marty rolled away into the corner and used the ropes to get back up, only to be met with a series of chops from Callihan and another bicycle kick, folding him in half, and allowing Callihan to turn him around and go for a bridging dragon suplex, but again, Scurll rolled out, and this time, was quick enough to get behind Callihan and yell "chicken wing"! Scurll went for the chicken wing, but Callihan managed to keep his hand under his jaw to stop it from fully being locked in. Scurll took exception to it, turned Callihan around and hit him with a DDT, before running into the ropes, yelling "have this mate!" and catching him with a soccer ball kick to the chest. Marty went for the cover, but Callihan kicked out at 2.9. Scurll started to get frustrated and began arguing with Rick Knox, as the two yelled "3!" "2!" 3!" 2!" 3! 2!" back and forth at each other, but during this time, Callihan got back up to his feet and span Scurll around, seemingly about to attempt something, but before he could, Marty simply poked him in the eye, and went for a bridging double underhook suplex, but Callihan countered it and went for the headlock driver. Scurll then countered that and went for the chicken wing, and Callihan then countered that by rolling back and hitting the headlock driver. Callihan moved as quickly as he could, going into the ropes and hitting the slingshot splash, and after that, locking in the stretch muffler, leaving Scurll no choice but to tap after a tremendous contest. Sami Callihan def. Marty Scurll via Stretch Muffler (11:23)
Timothy Thatcher vs Trevor Lee Lee wasted no time going after Thatcher, before the bell even rang, running towards him and sending him into the corner as he hit him with strikes and forearms. Lee stopped the onslaught for a second to gloat, and because of that, Thatcher almost decapitated him with a European Uppercut when he turned around. Timothy started to bring Lee to the mat and slow down the pace, opting to try and weaken Trevor's arm. Thatcher dropped knees, elbows, and utilised various holds in his bid to soften up Lee. Timothy almost locked in the Fujiwara Armbar, but Trevor was wise to it and grabbed the bottom rope before Thatcher could fully lock it in. Thatcher lifted Lee up to his feet and tried to lift him with another European Uppercut, but Lee was able to avoid this one, run into the ropes and hit Thatcher with a dropsault, taking him down to the mat. Trevor showed tremendous strength as he deadlifted the 240lb Thatcher from the mat and attempted the Deadlift German, but Timothy got out of it and hit Lee with a bridging double underhook suplex of his own for a two count. Thatcher moved back over to Lee's arm and continued to try his best to injure it, grabbing the hand, twisting at Lee's fingers, and then pulling the two middle ones apart. Lee grabbed ahold of his hand, and it became evident he was in severe pain. He backed off into the corner, and Thatcher began to stalk his prey, lifting Trevor up to his feet and smashing him with vicious forearms, uppercuts, and elbows in the corner. Lee fell forward, and Thatcher bought him down into the Kimura as he did. Tim tried to lock it in, but Trevor got his foot on the bottom rope before he fully could. Thatcher got back up and lifted Lee with a gutwrench, held him up for 10 seconds, and then hit Trevor with the gutwrench suplex. Thatcher didn't go for the cover, but instead, he lifted Lee back up and whipped him off into the ropes. Thatcher ran towards Lee, but seemingly out of nowhere, Trevor hit the running moonsault body slam, changing the momentum of the match. Trevor was slow to get back to his feet, but when he did, implored Timothy to get back up, yelling at him "get the up!". Thatcher got to his feet, and Lee went for the Small Package Driver, but Thatcher showed tremendous strength, and countered it into a vertical suplex of his own, before rolling back through, stomping on the arm, and locking in the Fujiwara Armbar. Trevor fought with all he had, but Thatcher was ultimately too much, and he had no choice but to tap out. Timothy Thatcher def. Trevor Lee via Fujiwara Armbar (12:35)
Jack Evans vs Brian Cage "Give me that mic, young man!", Evans yelled at Angelo Trinidad, as an eager Brian Cage waited for the match to begin, but Jack had a few words to say before it did.
"Listen here.. you know, when I went to Excalibur, and I said I wanted this match, I knew in my mind that I needed to get retribution. I knew that I needed to get revenge for how I was treated by Brian Cage last year in the Battle Of Los Angeles tournament. I wasn't just going to stand back and let another man stand proud knowing that he emasculated me and made me look like a bozo in front of my peers. So I'll tell you what I'm gonna do.. Brian Cage, I could give you one last chance to walk away and admit that Jack Evans is the alpha male and is infinitely superior to you in every way, but that wouldn't be good enough for me. I am The Rock's favourite wrestler, after all, so Brian Cage, I am going to beat you, I am going to maim you, I am going to eviscerate you, I am going to rip your head off, because tonight marks the beginning of the new era for me, tonight is the beginning of the next boom period in professional wrestling, tonight is the regenesis of Jack Evans!"
Cage darted towards Evans after that, Jack used his quickness to get out of the way and go for a springboard, but Cage caught him and almost launched him out of the ring, with a fall away slam, sending Jack into the ropes. Evans started writhing in pain, clutching his back and screaming. He used the ropes to get back up and tried to run into the opposing ones, but Cage simply grabbed him by the pants and stopped him from going anywhere. Evans started yelling at him to stop, to which Cage responded with "okay, sure", pulled Jack back and hit him with a German Suplex, turning him inside out. Cage continued to toy with Evans, throwing him around like a ragdoll. Jack ran into the ropes later on in the match and hit Cage with a dropsault, but the big man didn't even move. Evans tried another, but the same thing happened. On the third attempt, Jack surprised Cage by going low and hitting him in the knees, and this time hit a successful dropsault followed by a roundhouse, finally getting Cage down. Evans hit a split-legged corkscrew moonsault, but only got a one count as Cage threw him off like he was nothing. Evans ran at Cage, but Brian dropped him with a stiff lariat. Evans, stumbling, walked towards Cage, and Brian hit Weapon X to put him away. Brian Cage def. Jack Evans via Weapon X (6:59)
Adam Cole vs Mike Bailey From the very beginning, it was evident that Cole wasn't taking Bailey very seriously at all, consistently mocking him throughout the early goings, but his perception was drastically changed after a spin kick from Bailey knocked him for a loop. Mike began the match with high energy, hitting Cole with rapid fire kicks, and finishing it off with a Crane Kick, dropping Cole. "Speedball" then hit the standing cancun tornado, but instead of going for a cover, he bowed to the crowd, a mistake, as Cole was able to get back up, hit Mike with a superkick, and take the match into his own grasps. Cole focused his attack on the legs, and kept Bailey at bay for a good chunk of the match, dropping knees on the leg, stomping it, using a number of submissions and grapevining him to prevent him from using any more kicks, all while working the crowd into a frenzy with his antics. Cole constantly yelled "ADAM COLE BAYBAY!", "SUCK MY DICK SPEEDBALL!", and more. Adam continued to dismantle the underdog, mechanically working over the legs to cut off the striking game. The fire of young Bailey was strong, however, as he began to get up and hit a number of kicks followed by a reverse rana, spiking "The Panama City Playboy" right on the top of his head. Cole got right back up, seemingly due to adrenaline, but all he got was a soulbutt, folding him in half. Bailey climbed to the top and went for the shooting star knees, but Cole was able to move out of the way and go for the brainbuster on the knee. Adam tried, but failed, as Speedball broke free and went for a kick. Cole ducked that and went for the Florida Key, but Speedball went behind over the top of him, booted Cole in the spine and went for another crane kick, but Cole caught the leg and tried a capture belly to belly, but Bailey landed on the ropes. Before he could pull anything off, however, Cole ripped him off, climbed to the top himself and managed to hit the Panama Sunrise for the victory. Adam Cole def. Mike Bailey via Panama Sunrise (16:04)
Akira Tozawa vs Zack Sabre Jr Returning to PWG for the first time since July of last year, Tozawa was bathed in cheers by the faithful in Reseda, but Sabre, a regular, was equally as popular. The two men shook hands in a show of respect prior to the bell, and things got underway, as they tied up with the Greco-Roman knuckle lock, and Tozawa, the more muscular, took the early advantage, draping Zack over his knee and bringing him into a bridge. The flexible Sabre however climbed back up and took a grip of Tozawa's single arm, twisting around and wrenching on it. Tozawa then lifted his leg over the top of Sabre's and his own arms, and we got a clean break. They then danced around each other for a little while, both attempting to make moves but not fully committing, until Zack took Tozawa down with a single leg and started to try and cut out the lower extremities to prevent Tozawa from flying. Sabre used his unique offensive style to tie Akira's legs in knots with a series of innovative holds. Tozawa finally broke free, however, and the pace started to pick up when he threw Sabre over with a Saito Suplex and immediately followed it with a senton, but Zack wisely rolled to the outside before Tozawa could attempt a cover. Tozawa took exception, however, and came crashing down onto Sabre with a senton bomb from the apron, maintaining control and following it up by yelling "too easy!". Back in the ring later on, Sabre had taken control of the match and had Tozawa in the Octopus Hold, but the strength of the Dragon Gate representative was on show when he countered it into a Death Valley Driver in the corner, dropping Sabre on his neck and following it with a Hesitation Dropkick. Tozawa kept the fast pace up, lifting Sabre to the top rope and hitting him with a bicycle kick before attempting a superplex, but Zack hooked his legs around the turnbuckle and prevented it from happening. Sabre Jr started to fight back with elbows to the arm of Tozawa. Zack then grabbed ahold of Akira's hand/arm, and jumped off of the top rope, still holding onto the hand and immediately locked in a Kimura. Tozawa immediately started to try and move to the ropes, but all that did was expend energy, as he started to appear to be fading away. Tozawa made it to the ropes finally, however, and he and Sabre began to take a little while to get back up to get their breath back. They then met in the middle of the ring and started to exchange forearms, as Tozawa showed tremendous fighting spirit and folded Zack in half with a discus elbow. Tozawa went for the package German after he got his breath back again, but before he could pull it off, Sabre countered it and went for a dragon suplex. Tozawa countered that and ran into the ropes looking for a high knee, but Sabre moved, and then successfully hit the dragon suplex followed by the PK for the win. Zack Sabre Jr. def Akira Tozawa via PK (17:35)
PWG World Championship Roderick Strong (c) vs Chris Hero "Chris Hero has been on the front line for PWG for months in the fight against Mount Rushmore 2.0, but tonight, can he finally dethrone Strong, who has held that PWG World Championship for over a year now?" said Excalibur, as Hero stood in the corner, elbowing the top turnbuckle while Angelo Trinidad gave the introductions. Wearing gear themed after the New York Giants, Hero looked primed, ready, and focused to beat Strong and take back PWG, but before he could, Roderick took the microphone and demanded that Rick Knox be sent out of the ring because he believes him to be "unfair, biased, and a bald piece of crap". Knox left, and out came none other than Adam Cole dressed in a referee shirt. Strong said that by order of Super Dragon, Adam Cole will be refereeing this match. Hero, now even angrier than he already was, wasted no more time, hitting a discus boot on Strong to get things underway. Hero started to go to town on Strong in the corner with a series of elbows, unrelenting in his assault. Adam Cole tried to pull him away, and as a result, Hero almost elbowed him, but just barely restrained himself as Cole pointed to his shirt to inform Hero that he was untouchable. This momentary distraction allowed Strong to get some shots in, but Hero pushed him away and smashed him with another elbow. Strong collapsed into the corner, and Hero grabbed him with a front chancery, then hit him with a series of knee lifts, then again threw him to the side, but this time began to stomp away on the champion in the corner, then used his boot to choke Roderick. Strong, still yet to remove his Mount Rushmore t-shirt, had it ripped open by an irate Hero, who then lit his chest up with chops, and followed it up with a series of palm thrusts. Strong fell down, and as Hero looked at him, Adam Cole span him around and began arguing with him. While this was going on, Strong snuck up behind Hero and hit him with a low blow. Cole, the official, did nothing, stating that he didn't see it. Strong then took advantage of the situation, mounting Hero and raining down rights and lefts to the face as Chris tried to protect himself. Strong got back up and started stomping on Hero all over his body, from his head to his arms to his torso to his legs. Roddy rolled to the outside and pulled Hero groin-first into the ring post, before smashing his knee against it. As Chris held his knee in agony, Strong gloated to the fans, calling them "a bunch of marks", and then went back to attacking Hero. Strong pulled Hero to the floor with him, and attempted the apron assisted backbreaker, but Hero seemed to be too heavy, when miraculously, Strong managed to hit the move, displaying the Freaky Roderick Strength. Hero fell to the floor, but he couldn't recover, as Strong grabbed him by the head and threw him into a section of chairs. Strong got back into the ring and started to relax, sitting on a steel chair and putting his feet up on the ropes. Cole finally started to count Hero out, questionably fast, however, but Chris made it back in at 12. Roderick ran at him, but Hero lifted Strong in the air with a boot to the gut, following it up with a Hero DDT and a standing moonsault. Hero covered him, and may well have got the win there and then, but Adam Cole's slow count made sure that wasn't happening. Hero continued to argue with Cole, getting in his face and backing him into the corner, but not putting his hands on him and risking a disqualification. Hero began to get methodical, slowing the pace down and starting to wrestle a much more technical match, primarily focusing his offence on Roderick's arms, to take most of his offence out of his arsenal and prevent him from using moves like the Gibson Driver, End Of Heartache, Death By Roderick, Strong Hold and more. A full nelson seemed to be Hero's favoured hold, as he went back to it a number of times during the middle section of the match. Chris hit a double underhook suplex halfway through with a beautiful bridge, but Cole refused to count, claiming that Strong's feet were under the bottom rope, despite the fact they were very clearly not. By this point, Hero was sick of arguing with Cole, and instead of falling into his trap, started to get serious about taking out Roderick Strong. Holding the Champion up by his hair, Chris started to slap him, and then hit a huge offensive sequence constituent of a rolling elbow, a Mafia Kick, a discus elbow, an elbow to the back of the head, a ripcord rolling elbow and a Hero's Welcome. "Excalibur, let's be frank here, Chris Hero has beat the living crap out of Roderick Strong, and if it wasn't for Adam Cole, he would be the Pro Wrestling Guerrilla World Champion right now", said Chuck Taylor, and Excalibur agreed. Hero covered Strong, but Cole's extremely slow count again prevented him from becoming Champion. Hero picked Strong up again, and set him up for a Gotch Style Piledriver, but Adam Cole then superkicked him, then dragged Roddy's almost lifeless body on top of him, and counted 3, allowing Strong to retain. Roderick Strong def. Chris Hero (14:42)
Cole, soon joined by The Young Bucks, lifted Strong's body up in the air and raised his arm's as he held the belt. Both Bucks lifted him up on their shoulders in celebration, as Hero slowly used the ropes to get up. Adam Cole saw him, and he and The Young Bucks began to assault Hero in the corner, stomping away on him numerous times and setting him up for a triple superkick, but before they could, Zack Sabre Jr, Sami Callihan and Mike Bailey hit the ring to try and get rid of Mount Rushmore. Callihan hit the Headlock Driver on Cole and then followed that with a bicycle kick in the corner, while Bailey and Sabre focused on the Bucks. Speedball sent Matt out of the ring with a crane kick, and Sabre got rid of Nick with the PK, leaving Strong as the sole member of Mount Rushmore left in the ring. Cole just barely managed to pull Strong out of the ring, as Chris Hero got up to his feet, and the show closed with a view of Mount Rushmore running from PWG's best.
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