Previously on WCWA:
The last two weeks of Synthetic took place at the Vans Warped Tour. During the eight on eight total elimination Torneo Cibernetico, it was Claudio Castagnoli outlasting every other participant, finally finishing Tommy End after nearly two and a half hours of competition. The former champion made his intentions clear that he thinks this victory puts him the next in line for a shot at reclaiming the Heavyweight Championship of the World. However, Claudio isn't the only person gunning for the World Heavyweight Championship. World Junior Heavyweight champion Pac has stated that he sees himself as not just the best Junior Heavyweight in the company, but the best wrestler. And World Death Match champion The Necro Butcher's handler Joey Eastman called out Tommy End by name following Necro's absolute destruction of Spyder Nate Webb.
Absolute destruction was the calling card for last week's Synthetic, as Jolly Roger debuted in WCWA... and was immediately overshadowed by the debut of multi time former WWF & WCW Heavyweight Champion Psycho Sid Vicious. Led by Robby Mireno, Sid stormed the ring and immediately destroyed Jolly Roger and Ryan Cruz with chokeslams and powerbombs.
Mireno distancing himself from the BLK Out comes at a time when his BLK Out colleges are all imploding. Michael Facade defeated Jack Evans to advance in the International title tournament, but not before Eddie Kingston got involved. The vendetta between Evans and Kingston seems to escalate by the week.
The Cult Fiction team of Johnny Kashmere and Thirteen scored their first point for tag title qualification with a victory over The Ring Crew Express of Dunn and Marcos. The victory wasn't without controversy however, as the newest member of Cult Fiction, Homeless Jimmy, appeared on the scene and allowed the distraction for Cult Fiction to pick up the victory.
However. Cult Fiction weren't finished at the Vans Warped Tour. Special guest Andrew W.K. was in ring greeting the fans when he was interrupted and nearly mauled by Cult Fiction, until The Messiah made the save. Unfortunately for Messiah, he was the victim of the gang beat down from Cult Fiction instead of Andrew W.K., including a splash from a brand new yet unnamed member of Cult Fiction, tipping the scales at well over four hundred pounds.
And now, WCWA Synthetic.
We cut LIVE to the arena. Pan over the crowd as Ben Jordan and Allison Danger welcome us to the show. “Synthetic” by Spineshank plays in the background as the camera gets a close up on one particular row of fans.
Ben Jordan: Welcome ladies and gentlemen to another edition of WCWA Synthetic on HBO. We are coming to you live from the Idaho Center in Nampa, Idaho. WCWA makes it's Idaho debut tonight.
Allison Danger: Idaho, you da ho, we all da ho, Ben.
Ben Jordan: Are you well rested after your week's vacation from live shows, Allison? Because we've got a big show lined up tonight. Three title matches, but it don't get none bigger than the main event. World Heavyweight title on the line as Tommy End defends against Cult Fiction's own Delirious.
Allison Danger: Delirious has always been a little unpredictable but since the broken arm and the new found guidance from “Halfbreed” Billy Gram he's downright dangerous. He's on a mission to destroy the man who wronged him, Chris Hero.. but that path has led him to the World Heavyweight title tonight.
Ben Jordan: World Death Match title on the line as Joey Eastman Presents Joey Eastman Worldwide, The Necro Butcher with Joey Eastman, defending against Michael Facade.
Allison Danger: No folks, Ben didn't just have a series of small strokes. The notes have it written that way and we were threatened legal ramifications if we didn't read it that way.
Ben Jordan: Necro versus Facade, Allison..
Allison Danger: Michael Facade is a tough individual, but I don't know if he's ready to step in there in the realm of pain with the master of that world. But tonight, the title's on the line.
Ben Jordan: World Junior Heavyweight title on the line as “Tremendous” Emil Sitoci challenges “The Man that Gravity Forgot” Pac.
Allison Danger: Sitoci is a two time former champion, looking to become a three time champion. But standing in his way is arguably the best Junior Heavyweight this company has ever seen, “The Man that Gravity Forgot” Pac. This one is going to be one for the record books.
Ben Jordan: All that, plus two International title tournament matches, which we're starting out with, so without further ado, we send it up to Pedro DeLuca for the introductions!
Cut to the ring, where Pedro DeLuca stands center ring with a microphone in hand, dressed to the nines in a nice suit, joined in the ring by referee Bryce Remsburg.
Pedro DeLuca: Our opening contest for Synthetic is a second round match in the International title tournament, scheduled for one fall with a twenty minute time limit. Your referee is mister Bryce Remsburg.
Remsburg salutes the crowd. The lights dim and at the entrance way begin to flash in a strobe as “Money” by Pink Floyd echos through the arena, the sound of cash registers chinging and coins dropping filling the building. Ares makes his way through the curtain, a smug smirk on his face as he adjusts his neck tie. He carries a steel briefcase to the ring with him. Following a few paces behind is his tag team partner, Marc Roudin.
Pedro DeLuca: Introducing first, being accompanied to the ring by his tag team partner, Marc Roudin, from Zurich, Switzerland, weighing in tonight at two hundred and sixteen pounds, one half of Swiss Money Holding, “The Permanently Profit Producing Person” Ares!
Ares and Roudin make their way to the ring, careful to walk down the middle of the aisle to avoid being touched by any fans. Roudin hops to the apron, parting the ropes for Ares to enter.
Ben Jordan: Ares advanced to this point in the tournament with what could be considered an upset win over Delirious in the first round.
Allison Danger: Ares is a stud, Ben. Undefeated in both singles and tag team competition right now. But there's another undefeated wrestler in this tournament, American Joshi champion Sara Del Ray.
Ben Jordan: I believe now officially, she's the Television champion.
Allison Danger: Yeah yeah.. she beat me to become a champion and she beat me for the American Joshi championship.
“Money” cuts off, replaced fairly quickly by “Four Words to Choke Upon” by Bullet for my Valentine, a new song to WCWA. The reason for the new song quickly becomes clear, as Jimmy Jacobs makes his way out onto the stage in a long flowing black peacoat, carrying his signature walking stick in hand.
Pedro DeLuca: And his opponent, from Revolution Avenue in Detroit, Michigan, weighing in tonight at one hundred and forty nine pounds, Jimmy Jacobs!.
Ben Jordan: Jimmy Jacobs was the first person to advance in the International title tournament, defeating Spyder Nate Webb in that insane Key to Lacey's Heart, Boiler Room Brawl Pole Match back at Helter Skelter.
Allison Danger: Probably the most violent match in the tournament, at least he did advance in the tournament because he got nothing to show for it from Lacey. Not even a handy.
Ben Jordan: Jesus Allison, you can't say that on TV!
Allison Danger: ANYWHO, new music for Jimmy Jacobs. He's very over Lacey. Even unfriended her on Myspace.
Ben Jordan: GASP, NO!
Allison Danger: YEAH, I KNOW RIGHT?
Jimmy points to the crowd with his walking stick before making his way towards the ring. He discards of his jacket and walking stick and immediately slides into the ring. Jimmy to his feet quickly. Ares takes a swing with the briefcase at his head. Jimmy ducks under it. Ares spins around for another swipe. Jimmy boots him in the gut. Three fourth's chancery from Jimmy Jacobs. He runs up the corner. He's going for the Contra Code.
Allison Danger: Up Up Down Down Left Right Left Right A B Select Start!
Jimmy runs up the buckles and swings around, but Ares continues to rotate him, planting him on his feet. Ares wisely bails.
Ben Jordan: Exciting start here on Synthetic, I haven't heard an opening bell.
Allison Danger: How could you, over Jimmy's screamo entrance music?
Jimmy is about ready to dive onto Roudin and Ares on the floor, but is stopped by referee Bryce Remsburg. Remsburg backs Jacobs into a corner as Ares slowly makes his way into the ring. Remsburg makes a check for foreign objects on Jacobs then calls for the opening bell. Bell sounds and this match is under way and immediately Ares attacks Jacobs with a running forearm in the corner.
Allison Danger: The politically incorrect Gorilla Monsoon would've called that a Pearl Habor, but I have more broadcast integrity than that.
Ben Jordan: You made a reference to handjobs no more than ninety seconds ago..
Ares drags Jacobs to the center of the ring with a handful of hair. Fireman's carry from Ares into a bodyslam attempt, but Jimmy Jacobs lands on his feet, immediately darting into the ropes. Jimmy rebounds and comes at Ares. Big boot from Ares is ducked and rolled under by Jacobs. School boy from Jacobs. Ares rolls all the way through and back to his feet. Ares tries to drop an elbow but Jacobs rolls out of the way. Back senton from Jacobs but Ares gets the knees up. Jacobs bounces off the knees and back to his feet. Ares scrambles up. Sleeper hold from Ares. Jacobs runs into the ropes, springboarding to second rope, bouncing backwards and slamming Ares' shoulders to the mat. Referee down for the count, 1....2.... kick out at two from Ares.
Ben Jordan: Near fall from Jimmy Jacobs.
Allison Danger: Both men are going hard here, looking for a quick fall and an advancement to the next round to the International title tournament.
Both men back to their feet. Jimmy Jacobs runs at Ares. Ares punches him right between the eyes and Jacobs stumbles backwards. Jacobs stumbles into the ropes. Ares charges forwards looking for a clothesline over the top rope and to the floor. Jacobs drops down, pulling the top rope down as he drops. Ares stumbles over the top rope sideways and to the floor.
Allison Danger: Cactus clothesline and he catches none of it except the steel ring apron.
Ben Jordan: And the cold unforgiving concrete floor.
Jacobs looks down at the slowly recovering Ares. Jacobs takes a few steps back as Ares gets to his feet. Jacobs charges forwards, diving between the second and top rope like a missile towards Ares. Ares has enough wear-withal to side step slightly, directing Jacobs head first into the steel guardrail, which swings several inches backwards into the front row fans, one side coming loose. Ares grabs the other side of the rail, violently jerking it off and then slamming it down on Jacobs.
Allison Danger: Those ringside rails are about twenty pounds of steel. No give whatsoever.
Ben Jordan: Jacobs went crashing into the rail, then gets the rail smashed back onto him.
Ares pulls Jacobs out of the wreckage and rolls him back into the ring. With Jacobs laying slightly over the ring apron, Ares drives an elbow into the chest of Jacobs. Jacobs rolls away coughing and sputtering. Ares climbs back into the ring. Ares pulls Jacobs back to his feet and whips him into the ropes. Jacobs rebounds. Ares ducks for a back body drop. Sunset flip into a pin attempt from Jimmy Jacobs. Referee Bryce Remsburg down for the count, 1...2... kick out at two from Ares.
Ben Jordan: Near fall off of the sunset flip.
Allison Danger: In a federation where a vertebreaker onto cinder blocks covered in razors and light tubes is only a near fall, how much of a mind
would a fall off a sunset flip be?
Both men back to their feet. Jacobs charges at Ares. Ares cuts him off with a knee to the gut. Scoop from Ares into a delayed scoop slam, throwing Jacobs across the ring. Jacobs rolls over to his stomach in agony. Ares quickly mounts him. Camel clutch from Ares, he's got the chin locked with one hand and is driving his elbow into Jacobs' face with the other arm.
Allison Danger: Pretty brutal camel clutch. He's driving the bone of his elbow into Jacobs' face and scraping the bone of his forearm across in the over throw.
Ben Jordan: Ares and Roudin are both great athletes, no one's taking that away from them. They're just so smug about it that no one wants to talk at length about them doing good things.
Jacobs begins the crawl towards the ropes. Ares realizes he doesn't have the hold locked on tight and stands up, driving his butt into Jacobs' lower back. Ares back to his feet, hooking Jacobs by the head and neck. Front face lock pulls Jacobs to a vertical base. He hooks Jacobs' leg too, lifting him up, spinning him with a fisherman's buster into the canvas. Ares goes down for a cover, Bryce Remsburg making the count, 1.....2.... kick out at two from Jacobs.
Allison Danger: If nothing else, Jimmy Jacobs is resilent. He's been involved in some of the most violent matches in this company's history, and that says something..
Ben Jordan: He's one of the few men who can say they've stepped into no rope barbed wire in WCWA and lives to tell the story. Jimmy is tough and it's gonna take a lot to keep him down.
Ares to his feet. He's waiting for Jacobs to get back up. Jacobs slow back to his feet. He's got his back turned to Ares. Ares charges in as Jacobs turns. Jacobs catches him and flips him over with a belly to belly suplex. Quick transition from Jacobs. He's immediately going for the guillotine choke, but Ares scrambles across the ring, getting his foot over the bottom rope. Jimmy goes ahead and sinks the choke in. Referee Bryce Remsburg tells him to break the hold. He warns of a disqualification, then starts a count, 1.....2......3.......4...... and at just before five, Jacobs breaks free, rolling completely away from Ares.
Allison Danger: It's not breaking the rules, it's bending them.
Ben Jordan: And yeah, Ares made it to the ropes, but he still got choked for a solid six seconds. It takes nine seconds with that choke to choke someone to unconsciousness.
Allison Danger: And Jimmy knows that. If he could've choked him out in the ropes, all he'd have to do is drag him to the center of the ring and pin him.
Down the aisle way walks Lacey, taking Jacobs attention away from the match. As Jacobs stares up the entrance way and she approaches closer, the attention of referee Bryce Remsburg is taken as well. With both Jacobs and Remsburg staring up the entrance way, Marc Roudin passes in the briefcase. Ares grabs it, charging at Jimmy Jacobs and driving the briefcase into Jacobs' back, throwing it out the side ropes before referee Remsburg ever knows what happened. Jacobs stumbles out of the ropes. Ares grabs the groggy Jacobs, sit down double under hook power bombing him into the center of the ring.
Ben Jordan: Come on! Briefcase shot from behind!
Allison Danger: Followed up by that Tiger Driver that we've seen him put away a few people with.
Ares with a cover. Jacobs is out of it. Referee Bryce Remsburg down for the count, 1....2....3! Bell sounds. Pedro DeLuca makes the announcement official.
Pedro DeLuca: Your winner of this match and advancing to the third round of the International title tournament, Ares!
“Money” by Pink Floyd hits over the P/A system, Marc Roudin rolling into the ring to join Ares in a brief celebration. The camera cuts back to Lacey, who parts with a smile on her face.
Cut outside, near the dumpsters on the loading dock. Homeless Jimmy is sat near the dumpsters and the massive man who showed up last week is with him. But in the foreground is “Halfbreed” Billy Gram, nestling Delirious like a baby.
Halfbreed Billy Gram: The message is very clear to me. I've seen the message. I understand the message...Tonight I'm gonna do the absolutely most dangerous thing I can do to lead my troops. Nothing. I am going to sit back and watch like the rest of you sheep out there. I might even go to the concession stand, get me one of those big ol soda pops in the souvenir cup with Tommy End holding that pretty title belt. Cause that's gonna be worth a lot of money after tonight, cause they ain't gonna be making no more of those. And money's a good thing, right? Everyone likes money. Billy likes money. Tonight I ain't gonna do nothing and I'm just gonna let my war child do what he does best. No control. No filter. You gonna follow me? You don't got a choice but to follow me. Homeless Jimmy, he follows me..Tank, he follows me.
Billy points left to Jimmy, right to the large man known as Tank.
Halfbreed Billy Gram: You people don't understand me. You don't understand my mission. But you know what? I don't understand you either. I don't understand any of you. But I don't spend my whole life trying to push the blame on you because my cigarette didn't light or my car didn't start so why do you push the blame on me? Why do you blame Cult Fiction for all of your woes in the world? Why do you think old Billy G does all this bad in the world? I'm just an old burn out Indian medicine man who wants to smoke a little grass and sing a song. And you think I'm this evil man? You know what's evil? Power. Power is evil. And after tonight... I'll have all the power.
Billy slaps Delirious on the chest a few times. For the first time in the entire tirade, Delirious looks up, looking directly into the camera with a glazed over dead look in his eyes. And on that shot, we cut away.
Cut to the backstage area, near the gorilla position. Darin Corbin, Ryan Cruz, Joey Eastman, and The Necro Butcher stand by. Necro has the World Death Match championship belt thrown over his shoulder.
Joey Eastman: CAMERA MAN, ZOOM!
On request, the camera zooms in on Joey Eastman's face as usual.
Joey Eastman: No, not on me. Camera man, zoom in on that belt. That World Death Match title. The ten pounds of gold that says Joey Eastman represents the BADDEST MAN ON THE PLANET! Neon Ninja, you think you're big and bad enough to take the belt from the Butcher? You've been huffing paint fumes for too long and you've killed too many brain cells. Luckily for you, Necro Butcher is going to beat you down and kill off the rest of your brain cells. And no one can do anything about it. Not Eddie Kingston, not Jack Evans, not Ruckus, not that decrepit old fossil Terry Funk. You think Terry Funk cares about you, Facade? He ran off to New York for the pay window. One night stands are more important than on running affairs.
Darin Corbin in the background starts to chant.
Darin Corbin: Forever.... forever.... forever...
Joey Eastman: Tommy End.. And heck, Delirious.. I want you to both pull up a seat near a monitor. And I want you both to watch what happens. Because whoever between you two comes away with the title tonight.. You're gonna be stepping in with the Butcher at Guilty by Association. And the Butcher don't care who it is, be it Facade, Tommy End, Delirious, Claudio, Pac... he's only got one thing on his mind..
Necro Butcher steps forwards, growling at the camera.
Necro Butcher: CHOOSE DEATH!
As he says that, “Boom Boom Boom Boom” by the Vengaboys begins to play.
Joey Eastman: Mr. Butcher, if you'll excuse us, these boys got a match to take care of.
Cut back to the arena, to the entrance way, and Joey Eastman takes the two steps forwards from his previous position to emerge through the curtain. Behind him is first Darin Corbin, who points to his electronic belt which reads “GUMP FICTION”. Ryan Cruz closes the tail, though he's walking a lot more gingerly than the other two and seems injured.
Pedro DeLuca: The following match is a tag team match, set for one fall, with a fifteen minute time limit. Your referee is Derek Sabato. Introducing first, being accompanied to the ring by Joey Eastman and representing Joey Eastman Worldwide, first, from Minneapolis, Minnesota, weighing in tonight at one hundred and ninety three pounds, “Delicious” Darin Corbin! And his tag team partner, also from Minneapolis, Minnesota, weighing in tonight at one hundred and seventy five pounds, “Ravishing” Ryan Cruz, together they are the North Star Express!
The North Star Express make their way to the ring, Corbin dancing very animated. Joey Eastman gets very close to the roving floor camera, screaming into the camera.
Joey Eastman: ONE POINT TONIGHT, ONE POINT TOWARDS TITLE CONTENTION, ONE OF THREE!
The North Stars make their way into the ring. Cruz continues to hold his mid section and is reluctant to even pose. They climb into the ring. Referee Sabato gives them each a quick check for foreign objects as their music cuts off. It's replaced by “Big Bad John” by Jimmy Dean. Thirteen comes running through the curtain like an absolute maniac. He's wearing the dog collar and chain, but no one is holding the other end of the chain, causing him to just swing it around like a tiny Bruiser Brody.
Pedro DeLuca: And their opponents, from the Cult Fiction Compound, first, weighing in tonight at one hundred and fifty four pounds, Thirteen! And his tag team partner, weighing in at three hundred and three pounds, “Big” John Heidenreich! Together, they are CULT FICTION!
John Heidenreich is much more direct than Thirteen, marching straight to the ring, climbing to the ring apron and stepping over the top rope. Joey Eastman scrambles out of the ring as Heidenreich enters. Thirteen climbs in, swinging his chain around at anyone within reach. Referee Derek Sabato carefully approaches, trying to get Thirteen to relinquish the chain.
Allison Danger: Billy Gram calls Thirteen his little dog.. and he certainly acts like one.
Ben Jordan: Billy Gram not out here with his men because as we heard him say earlier, tonight, he's going to do absolutely nothing..
Allison Danger: That could be really bad, Ben. We've seen Heidenreich go nuts and throw people towards the crowd before. What's to stop him from really doing it tonight?
Promo: Joey Eastman w/ Necro Butcher. Trash Facade, call out Tommy End, mention Terry Funk
__________________________
Darin Corbin & Ryan Cruz (0) vs. Heidenreich & Thirteen (0) - after Cult Fiction win, Eastman publicly berates Cruz and Corbin, but places the blame solely on Cruz, since Corbin has succeeded with Fountaine. Corbin turns on Cruz. Corbin, Fountaine, Necro, & Eastman beat Cruz out of JEW
________________________________
Promo: Chris Hero. Delirious/Corino
_______________________________
Cut to a black, empty space. Ben Jordan steps into view, a single light illuminating him into view. He's dressed to the nines in a tuxedo, but not a formal tuxedo.. More like a funeral tuxedo.
Ben Jordan: Evil.. It's profoundly immoral and malevolent. I say evil is subjective. What is or isn't evil.. It's all subjective.
The background behind Ben lights up. It's a video wall. And playing behind him is the now infamous shot of Chuck Taylor and Chris Hero spike pile driving Allison Danger onto a steel chair is shown.
Ben Jordan: But regardless.. If you commit the evil yourself, or if you just stand by and watch it.. You're still guilty.. by association.
Ben bows his head and walks away as the aftermath from the attack plays through. The chorus from "Guilty by Association" by H2O takes over. "Guilty by association.. Judged by who I know.. Can't keep all my friends outta trouble when they got no place to go."
WCWA Guilty by Association, live on Pay Per View Saturday night, July twenty second two thousand six, from the Arrowhead Pond of Anaheim in Anaheim, California. Tickets are available now at ticketmaster.com, WCWAwrestling.com, or the arena box office.
Cut back to the commentary table. Allison Danger gives a sly smile to the camera as she realizes she's on.
Ben Jordan: Guilty by Association, just two weeks away.
Allison Danger: It's come on so quickly!
Ben Jordan: We know that the finals of the International title tournament will take place at Guilty by Association.. But who's the top contender for the World Heavyweight title? Pac called out Tommy End, Claudio Castagnoli called out Tommy End.. and at the close of the show last week, The Necro Butcher threw his name in the hat..
Cut back to the ring, where Pedro DeLuca stands by with former WCWA referee Harry Broadhurst.
Pedro DeLuca: The following is a special attraction MIDGETS MATCH, set for one fall with a fifteen minute time limit. It is sponsored by the WCWA Almanac, out now. Your referee for this contest is WCWA Hardcore Hall of Famer, Harry Broadhurst.
The returning referee gets applause for his gesture.
Ben Jordan: Returning Hall of Fame referee Harry Broadhurst, who was responsible for a lot of the book keeping in compiling the WCWA Almanac.
Allison Danger: Yeah, let's hope he keeps his hands to himself tonight..
“The Show Must Go On” by Three Dogs Night hits over the P/A system and a familiar face emerges through the curtain, Puppet!
Pedro DeLuca: Introducing first, from Chicago, Illinois, weighing in tonight at one hundred and fifty four pounds, standing four feet four inches, he is Puppet the Psycho Dwarf!
The fans cheer for Puppet as he waddles towards the ring.
Ben Jordan: Allison Danger, did you know this isn't Puppet's first appearance in WCWA?
Allison Danger: I did.
Ben Jordan: And how'd you know that?
Allison Danger: Well Ben Jeezy, I picked up the WCWA Almanac, where I can see Puppet has a WCWA in ring record of 0-1, with no other matches. Comparable records are Virgil, Abdullah the Butcher, and Tito Santana. Did you know THOSE GUYS all appeared in WCWA??
Puppet climbs into the ring and gets the obligitory pre match check. His music cuts off, replaced by “Beautiful” by Christina Aguilera. And with that, a midget in a flowing red robe with a deeply receeding hairline emerges through the curtain.
Pedro DeLuca: And his opponent, from St. Louis, Missouri, weighing in tonight at one hundred and four pounds, standing four feet seven inches, he is “Beautiful” Bobby DEAN!
Beautiful Bobby makes his way to the ring with a certain midget swagger, drawing boos from the crowd.
Ben Jordan: First time we're seeing Beautiful Bobby in WCWA, not to be confused with Beautiful Bobby Eaton..
Allison Danger: How much would it have pissed off Jim Cornette if we would've had this guy come out to The Chase?
Beautiful Bobby slides into the ring, derobbing fairly quickly. Harry Broadhurst calls for the opening bell. Bell sounds and this one is under way. The two midgets circle the ring. Collar and elbow tie up. Break from Bobby and a clothesline takes Puppet to the mat.
Allison Danger: Short arm clothesline..
Ben Jordan: Already the puns?
Allison Danger: What? It might be a short match.
Ben Jordan: Groan..
Allison Danger: Sorry, that was low.
Ben Jordan: GROAN!
Beautiful Bobby pulls Puppet back to his feet. Scoop and a slam by Bobby. Bobby takes a moment to pose to the crowd, who are not having Bobby's antics.
Allison Danger: Hey Ben, why do midgets laugh when they run?
Ben Jordan: I'm afraid to ask, but why?
Allison Danger: Because the grass tickles their balls.
Ben Jordan: Oh for the love of God!
Allison Danger: A midget walks into a bar..
Ben Jordan: STOP!
Big elbow from Beautiful Bobby. He pulls Puppet to his feet and whips him into the buckles. Puppet hits the second buckle. Rush in from Bobby and Puppet swings up, throwing both feet into Bobby's face. Bobby rushes in again. Sunset flip from Puppet. Referee Harry Broadhurst down for a count, 1.... 2.... kick out from Bobby.
Allison Danger: Only a count of two and..
Ben Jordan: Just stop.
Allison Danger: I'm calling the match, Ben. I'm done with the midget jokes.
Ben Jordan: GOOD!
Allison Danger: I'm not that small.
Both men back to their feet. Single leg takedown from Puppet puts Bobby back to the mat. Cover from Puppet. Referee Harry Broadhurst down for a count again. 1....2... kick out from Bobby. Back on the cover from Puppet, 1....2.... kick out with authority this time from Bobby, pressing Puppet off and throwing him into the arms of Harry Broadhurst, who throws him back into a pin position, then counts. 1.....2... another kick out from Beautiful Bobby.
Ben Jordan: Fair and impartial, Harry Broadhurst, ladies and gentlemen.
Allison Danger: Who are you kidding? I'm the only girl watching this show and I ain't no lady.
Both men back to their feet. Beautiful Bobby confronting Harry Broadhurst about the throw. Push from Bobby. Push back from Harry and Bobby takes a bump. Bobby scrambles back to his feet. He begins a chase after Harry Broadhurst, but the lights cut out. There's an explosion on the stage.. and “Psycho Killer” by Talking Heads hits over the P/A system.
Ben Jordan: Oh God...
Allison Danger: GET OUT OF THERE! EVERYONE!
Just like last week, Robby Mireno emerges through the curtain, leading the massive Psycho Sid Vicious towards the ring. Sid is clad in only blue jeans and black boots and looks to have just got out of a shower. The two men make their way to the ring, Sid climbing into the ring over the top rope. The lights come back and the music cuts off. Beautiful Bobby, still feeling full of himself, immediately confronts Sid.
Ben Jordan: We're gonna have a murder..
Allison Danger: At least the splatter won't leave a big mess
Ben Jordan: STOP IT ALREADY!
Sid leans down, looking way down at Bobby... And grabs him by the neck! Bobby realizes he's in trouble, but doesn't realize how much until he's raised about six feet in the air and brought back down with a choke slam from hell.
Ben Jordan: FOR THE LOVE OF GOD! He's a little person!
Allison Danger: Midget. Dead midget. But midget none the less.
Sid immediately turns, staring down Harry Broadhurst, who's locked up like a deer in headlights. Sid boots the referee in the gut, doubling him over. Stuff from Sid and a lift, he powerbombs referee Harry Broadhurst into the mat!
Ben Jordan: Come on! He's not a trained athlete!
Allison Danger: He's barely trained!
Ben Jordan: STOP IT ALLISON!
With only one man left in the ring, Sid turns his attention to Puppet. Puppet tries to run away, but runs right into the waiting arms of Robby Mireno. Puppet is shaking wildly trying to get away. Mireno throws Puppet into Sid. Dead lift from Sid, not even a stuff, but he turns Puppet over and THROWS him to the mat, launching the Psycho Dwarf into the canvas with an insane powerbomb!
Allison Danger: Okay, even I think that's a little much.
Ben Jordan: Thank you!
Allison Danger: Get it? Little? Much?
Ben Jordan: You are a sick individual...
Robby Mireno demands the microphone. With little reluctance, Pedro DeLuca hands the house mic in to him.
Robby Mireno: DID YOU DUMB MOTHER
ERS THINK LAST WEEK WAS THE END? You think this human wrecking ball was going to stop with just two casualties? This is only the beginning. And any time I see fit, I'm gonna unleash my monster. I'll unleash the mobile killing machine whenever I see fit, on whoever I see fit! You
ed with Robby for too long and you done
ed up. You think this is all a game? It's chess. And I call checkmate. Sid, get the fat one again!
Sid grabs a handful of Beautiful Bobby's stringy blonde mullet. He uses it to drags Bobby up enough that he can dead lift him under the arms. It becomes more of a release gut wrench powerbomb, but Sid swings Beautiful Bobby up and throws him to the canvas.
Ben Jordan: For the love of God!
Allison Danger: Well, at least it was a short beating.
As Beautiful Bobby spikes into the canvas, Sid begins to scream incomprehensibly. Sid's screaming is made even harder to understand when “Psycho Killer” hits over the P/A system again, the guys in the truck doing their best to usher out the carnage. Sid gets in close to the apron camera.
Sid: I AM THE MASTER! I AM THE RULER OF THE UNIVERSE! I AM THE DESTRUCTOR!
Mireno takes a passing cheap kick to the still downed referee Harry Broadhurst before the two men exit the ring, leaving a trail of bodies behind them.
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Promo: Shane Douglas
________________________
Cut to the backstage area, where Pac stands by. He's standing near a white block wall with the WCWA World Junior Heavyweight championship thrown over his shoulder.
Pac: The World Junior Heavyweight Championship means a lot to me, but I'm looking forward to capturing the World Heavyweight Championship. There's never been a triple crown champion in WCWA history. No one has held the World Tag Team and World Junior Heavyweight or World Heavyweight titles. I've already made history as the first man to hold two and at Guilty by Association, I will become the first man to capture the WCWA Triple Crown.. …..and I will be the first man to hold the World Junior Heavyweight and World Heavyweight titles simultaneously. You see I..
Pac stops mid sentence and puts up his guard. Marc Roudin has made his way into the shot. And without saying a word, Roudin SPITS in Pac's face. Pac wipes the spit away and lunges for Roudin, who takes off running. Roudin rounds a corner in the backstage area, Pac follows him and WHAM! Tommy End is caught in the face by a Halliburton briefcase from Ares.
Pac goes down to the ground. Ares takes another shot with the briefcase, this time to the back of The Man That Gravity Forgot. Roudin grabs the Junior Heavyweight championship belt and smashes it into the back of Pac's head. Pac is to his knees and he's busted WIDE open. And from behind, more Kings of Wrestling attack. It's Claudio Castagnoli nailing Pac with a running boot to the back that sends Pac back to the ground. Hero and Chuck Taylor are next to join the fray, both taking a few pot shot kicks. Castagnoli grabs a handful of hair, dragging the bloody Pac to his feet.
Claudio Castagnoli: You are not in my league. YOU! ARE! NOT! IN! MY! LEAGUE!
Castagnoli throws Pac backwards, slamming him against a metal sliding garage door. Pac leaves a blood splatter upon impact. But he barely has time to crumble to the ground. Emil Sitoci is into the scene. He grabs Pac's bloody hand and SLAMS it into the cold hard concrete, bouncing Pac's head like a basketball off the ground. Chuck Taylor comes running from out of no where, launching a full coffee urn into Pac's chest, the scalding hot coffee exploding everywhere.
Claudio drags Pac to his feet and locks him in a full nelson. Emil Sitoci tees off on his stomach with punches while he's restrained. Chris Hero slams his World Tag Team title belt into Pac's face, hitting him with such force that Claudio almost drops him. Hero is directing traffic now. He points to a closed garage door about twenty feet in the distance.
Chris Hero: Get that door open! Get it open now!
Roudin and Ares run like henchmen, both grabbing at the bottom of the door and raising it up. Pac is kicking at Hero still. Sitoci grabs the steel briefcase and slams it into Pac's bludgeoned face. Pac leaves a smear of crimson vital fluids across the surface of the briefcase as it drags across his face. Claudio pulls Pac's pretty much limp body towards the open garage door. It's still day light, the July sun shining in through the opening. Claudio flings Pac down to the painted concrete floor. Pac is trying desperately to crawl to his feet, the crimson mask flowing down his face and pooling underneath him. Emil Sitoci charges forwards and boots him in the face again.
Sitoci pulls Pac back a little bit, putting him ever so slightly outside. And without much hesitation, Ares and Roudin bring the metal garage door CRASHING down onto Pac's stomach. Pac lets out a primal scream in agony, trying to sit up but trapped underneath the door. Hero stands back, shouting orders from a distance.
Chris Hero: DO IT AGAIN! Hit him where it counts this time!
Ares pulls the door up. Roudin is on top of Pac, pulling him back inside by his arms. Pac spits a giant wad of blood, either run off from his face or internal injuries. Sitoci climbs underneath the slightly opened door, grabbing ahold of Pac's feet and pinning them down. And once more, the garage door comes SLAMMING down, this time slamming down onto both of Pac's shins. Pac sits up, screaming in agony as he's trapped underneath the door. Claudio boots him in the face once more. A door opens at the side of the garage door. Sitoci makes his way back inside the building. He's down in Pac's face on his hands and knees.
Emil Sitoci: The show must go on, mate. I'll see you out there...
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Second Round Match in International Title Tournament: Shane Douglas vs. Sara Del Ray
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Promo: Ryan Cruz
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We cut away to a special video package. Music plays in the background, “Change” by Tracy Chapman. And characters begin to flow on the screen. One after another, the key characters from each of HBO's shows flow on the screen. Rome, The Sopranos, Deadwood, The Wire, Curb Your Enthusiasm, Extra, Entourage.. The signature of this montage is that super-imposed imagry has added the name of each show within the scene, so that the characters are walking near larger than life letters.. And the purpose of the montage becomes clear. Tommy End, from the end of Helter Skelter comes on the screen, holding the WCWA World Heavyweight title proudly. Cut to Chris Hero, a smug, arrogant smirk on his face. Cut to Jimmy Jacobs, running his hands through his hair and looking like a maniac. Then cut to Eddie Kingston. He throws a vicious Back Fist to the Future to the face of Bobby Eaton, and as Kingston's hand swoops through the air, in the same bold letters as every other show in the montage, “WCWA Synthetic” appears on the screen.
It's not TV. It's HBO.
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Matt Jackson & Nick Jackson (2) vs. Jack Evans & Ruckus (0) – involvement from Eddie Kingston leads to Ruckus taking the fall. Evans/Kingston face to face. Facade grabs Jack. Kingston destroys Ruckus
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Post Match, after all the mayhem, Lacey promo about 3 points
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Promo: Jolly Roger. Lots of pirate puns.
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Beef Wellington vs. Kamala w/ Joel Gertner & Kimchee – post match, Kimchee unmasks as Jimmy Jacobs, his cane a sword.
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Cut to the loading docks, where Jack Evans stands by.
Jack Evans: They say that when you're fighting monsters, you gotta be careful that you don't become a monster yourself. Eddie Kingston, you think you're the monster? You think you're this bad dude, test my gangsta.. Eddie, I know what's underneath that tough exterior homie. You ain't foolin me, man. I know who Eddie Kingston really is. He's scared. You're scared that your walls are gonna be broken down. You're scared that people gonna expose you. And that's exactly what I'm gonna do, Eddie. You think I'm scared of you? I ain't scared homie. I ain't scared of you. I ain't scared of what you're gonna do. You gonna hurt me? I been hurt before.. Look bro, you're playing playing politics here. And we on the same side, homie. But you wanna settle this? One of us stays. One of us goes.
Jack Evans peels off his BLK Out shirt, holding it up for the camera.
Jack Evans: This what it about homie? The BLK Out colors? You wanna tear down everything we built? Tell you what.. Guilty by Association. Me and you. Winner takes all. You want the BLK Out? It's your's. I'm gone. It's gone. Never again. No more catchphrases, no more test my gangsta. BLK Out is your's to do what you want with... But Eddie, when I beat you.. you gonna knock this bullcrap off and step the
back. You gonna go back to your roots homie, you are BLK Out. And at Guilty by Association, I'm gonna show you once and for all... THAT YOU ALWAYS BET ON BLACK... AND YOU KNOW THIS, MAN!
Promo:
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Second Round Match in International Title Tournament: Chuck Taylor vs. Johnny Kashmere
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Cut to the backstage area. A still blood-spattered Beef Wellington stands by.
Beef Wellington: Jimmy Jacobs... Jimmy JACOBS... JIMMY
ING JACOBS! Why... won't... you... go... AWAY? Out of my life, you miserable piece of crap? Every time I turn around you're right there. Every move I make, you're right there. Jimmy, no rope barbed wire was supposed to end this with you. No rope barbed wire was supposed to be the climax of it all.. But you still come back around. You're like
ing herpes. I can't get rid of you. Every time I think you're gone, you show back up and ruin everything! Tonight was supposed to be a crowning achievement for me. I was going to end that unfunny comedy act with Kamala once and for all. Hahahahaha, he sings, soooo funny. NO, BULLcrap!
Kamala and
his singing! Tonight was supposed to be the END of Kamala.. Tonight was going to be the end of that fat slob Gertner and the end of Kamala.. but here comes Jimmy Jacobs! He's such a good guy now, everyone loves Jimmy!
Beef Wellington: Jimmy, I know you. I know exactly who you are under this charade you're putting up. I know you beneath this BULLcrap! I don't CARE if Lacey broke your heart, you aren't changed. You're still the piece of crap that's been lingering around this company for way too long. But Jimmy... we're gonna end this. This time, we're gonna end it for sure..
Beef steps back, pulling a black cloth away from behind him.. and he's now standing in front of a shining metal casket.
Beef Wellington: Jimmy, I'm going to bury this rivalry once and for all.
As we cut back to the arena, “Whisper in the Chaos” by Lullacry hits. The lights dim and the entrance begins to flash with white lights. And through the lights emerges LuFisto.
Ben Jordan: New entrance song for LuFisto. She's made a lot of threats for tonight.
Allison Danger: I don't think they're so much threats as promises.
LuFisto isn't in ring gear, instead wearing tight ripped jeans and a pink and black t-shirt. She makes her way to the ring quickly, rolling in under the bottom rope. LuFisto gets to her feet and requests the microphone. Pedro DeLuca is nice enough to hand one in from ringside.
LuFisto: Cut the music.
Abruptly, LuFisto's new entrance music comes to a close.
LuFisto: You think it's all fun and games to throw LuFisto around and beat me up but the time is up for that. The time is up for the fun and games. You want a war? Vous voulez une guerre? Je vais vous apporter une guerre, et ceci est une guerre où il n'y aura pas de survivants! Cela ne va pas être une guerre, ça va être un bain de sang! Ladies and gentlemen, introducing.. VIKING!
“L'âge de bière” by Mononc' Serge hits over the P/A system. Through the curtain emerges a small stocky individual with a crew cut dyed blue. He's got eyeliner smeared over his face and several lip rings. He's donning his best ripped up cut off army shorts and sleeveless cut up t-shirt for his big TV appearance. Cut back to LuFisto, who seems very happy to see him.
Allison Danger: I didn't catch all of LuFisto's promo because my French is merde at best..
Ben Jordan: That's a swear..
Allison Danger: But I know a few words she said and a lot were violent. And Viking, she said his name was?
Viking hits the ring. He gets to his feet and walks across the ring. And immediately slaps LuFisto with a VICIOUS slap! The crowd can't believe it. The music cuts off. Viking grabs LuFisto by the head, slamming skull to skull with a headbutt. Viking stuffs LuFisto's head under his arm, hooking her leg and lifting her into the air, driving her head first into the mat with a vicious brainbuster.
Ben Jordan: What is THIS?? I thought he was supposed to be on LuFisto's side!
Allison Danger: Didn't you hear what Beef and SeXXXy Eddy said about this guy? He's nuts.
Viking rolls out of the ring. He grabs a chair from ringside and throws it into the ring. Then a second chair. LuFisto is slowly getting to her feet. Viking back into the ring. He grabs one of the chairs and smashes her over the back with it. LuFisto still gets to her feet but scrambles away from the chair brandishing Viking. Viking stalks after LuFisto and when she turns around he WRAPS the chair around her head with a vicious chair shot.
Allison Danger: She said this is her brother, Ben! What brought on this big upswing of violence?
Ben Jordan: I have no idea. I have to assume they were together a few minutes ago!
LuFisto crumbles into the ropes. She's split open from the chair shot and her face oozes the crimson vital fluids. Viking tosses the chair down and pulls LuFisto out of the ropes. Viking drags LuFisto to the center of the ring. Boot to the gut. LuFisto doubles over. Viking turns around, stuffing her head to his butt and hooking her arms. He turns her over, lifting her onto his back and dropping her head first again, this time planting her into the mat with a vertebreaker.
Allison Danger: Tueurs de Policiers!
Ben Jordan: Run that by me again?
Allison Danger: Cop killer, Ben!
Viking back to his feet. LuFisto is a broken mess. With an angry growl, Viking recovers the microphone and screams into it.
Viking: Salope stupide! Vous sale sans valeur putain putain, vous êtes seulement bon pour être utilisé pour une benne de foutre putain vous putain stupide, vous pensez que vous allez être un bon lutteur? Vous êtes seulement ici pour seins et le cul!
Allison Danger: I caught some of that and it's pushing our censors here...
Viking tosses the microphone down with a horrible thud. Viking pulls LuFisto back to her feet, quickly spinning her around, throwing her over his back, and dropping her with a second vertebreaker, this time onto a chair. Referees rush the ring, Viking bailing stage left and through the crowd.
Ben Jordan: What the hell did we just see??
_____________________________________
Promo: Claudio Castagnoli
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WCWA World Death Match Title Match: Necro Butcher vs. Michael Facade
In ring promo: Joey Eastman. Calling out Tommy End or Delirious.
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Cut to the backstage area. Near a catering table, SeXXXy Eddy stands by.
SeXXXy Eddy: You know it's been a long time since The Triple X Sex Express got to mix it up with a hot young lady... and it's been even longer since this waist was draped in gold. International title tournament didn't work out so well for Cock Hero, but I've made a few calls.. I've got a couple meetings.. and thanks to my buddy The Franchise, there's an opening for me. And you know, SeXXXy Eddy is never one to pass up an opening! So Guilty by Association, my dick's hard, and all night long.. I've been thinking about those sexy muscular biceps. Those beautiful thick thighs.. Pinning Sara Del Ray to the mat and stripping her.. ….of the World Television title.
Eddy makes a vulgar motion with his tongue towards the camera as we cut away.
__________________________________
Promo: Joey Eastman with Marion Fontaine & Darin Corbin. Confirms new North Star Express
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WCWA World Junior Heavyweight title match: Emil Sitoci vs. Pac © - a Hero/Delirious brawl costs Pac the match. Corino pops up to lay out Hero.
______________________________________
Promo:
___________________________________
WCWA World Heavyweight title match: Delirious vs. Tommy End © - Hero tries to get involved, stopped by Corino
Tommy End: Claudio Castagnoli.. you want a rematch with me for this belt? You got it. Me and you. Guilty by Association.
The crowd explodes in cheers.
Ben Jordan: There you have it! Guilty by Association, we're gonna have a rematch for the Heavyweight title!
Allison Danger: These two about killed each other in the first title match. I don't see how round two isn't the end of one of them.
Tommy End: Pac, you wanna set up? You want the Heavyweight title? Bring it on. Guilty by Association.
The crowd cheers again, though much less deafening and a mix of confusion too.
Ben Jordan: Wait, he just said he's giving the title shot to Claudio though?
Allison Danger: Maybe it'll be a double header? Mini tournament or something?
Tommy End: Oh Necro Butcher..
End makes air quotes.
Tommy End: “The Baddest Man on the Planet”. Don't think I forgot about you.. You think you're a tough guy cause you punch hard and can swing a bat wrapped in barbed wire? I kick hard. I don't need weapons. My body is my weapon. You think you're the Baddest Man on the Planet? Bring it on. Guilty by Association.
The crowd is utterly confused now and mostly talking among themselves.
Allison Danger: Is he just calling out everyone? Ben Jordan, you want some of him? Take him on at Guilty by Association!
Ben Jordan: I like not having my spleen kicked out through my throat, thanks.
Tommy End: Guilty by Association, we're going into deep waters. Tommy End, Claudio Castagnoli, Necro Butcher, Pac... World Heavyweight Championship.. WE ENTER THE SHARK TANK!
The crowd mostly is confused as Tommy End drops the microphone and exits the ring.
Ben Jordan: Allison Danger, our Guilty by Association main event is set.. a four way... shark tank match? What's a shark tank match?
Allison Danger: I have no idea.. But we're gonna have to see next week! They're yelling in my ear piece.
Ben Jordan: They're yelling in mine too. We're all out of time. For Allison Danger, I'm Ben Jordan, we'll see you next week on Synthetic.
Allison Danger: Peace!
“Iron Man” blares through the arena as Tommy End makes his way up the isle way. He raises the Heavyweight Championship belt over his head for all to see as we fade to black. A WCWA logo washes over the screen with the copyright information at the bottom before we cut to black entirely, an HBO static logo the final shot on the screen.
(c) 2006/2016, Half Life Media Inc. a division of Extreme Entertainment Inc.