WFWF Supreme Gauntlet '17 Night Three: Brain Damage

January 4th 2017

In hindsight, after the events of the last month or so, it'll sound quite silly. It'll make me sound a little naïve.

But you know, I really was excited when I found out a spot in the Supreme Gauntlet wasn't going to be selected from the WFWF roster. That the opportunity was going to be there for anyone who wanted to, to come down and prove that they deserve a spot on the WFWF roster. That they deserve a chance to become the World Champion of what we're constantly told, is the home of professional wrestling. The greatest sports body in the world.

I'm not a huge fan of the battle royal as a means of finding the strongest competitor, because I'm not always sure it does that. But you can't win it without having something about you – or so I thought – and that was huge. That meant that we were surely about to see the finest athletes in the world descend upon this promotion and one of them, not necessarily the best, but one incredible talent, was about to arrive. About to challenge for our World Championship. I was even more ecstatic when I found out they were in my section of the draw.

Knowing they were about to push me to up my game that little bit more, because I'd have to.

And having spent a year touring the greatest wrestling promotions in the world, it's fair to say I was ready to go on the recruitment drive of all recruitment drives. That just about every number in my phone was getting a call and a...

Joe Bishop: Man you've got to get in on this battle royal.

I was so ready to recruit the best and the brightest talents from around the world to make sure they got in on this opportunity to earn not just a place on the WFWF roster, but potentially the 'biggest' prize in professional wrestling. And, even though I'm dissatisfied with the way things have been going, I really didn't think it'd be too difficult to convince people. So you can imagine my disappointment, when time after time I got the same response...

Martyn Howard: Why?

It should have been self explanatory really. It should have sold itself. But this promotion doesn't do that any more. No serious competitor looks at the WFWF and thinks 'that's the place to be', they look at it and they think 'what a f***ing circus'. And you know what, I agree with them.

So maybe I wasn't the best person to sell it. Maybe my response didn't come with quite enough conviction to win people over.

Joe Bishop: It's a huge chance... you win this and you'll be the World Champion of our sport.

Martyn Howard: You've spent a year telling us it's a joke.

Joe Bishop: I know but...

Martyn Howard: And you weren't wrong. It is.

Joe Bishop: We can change it.

Of that I was convinced, but I seem to be having a real hard time convincing anybody else.

Martyn Howard: No. We can't. Either I lose and make no impact, or I win and Michael Kyzer puts a sword in me, or Philip Schneider puts a shard of glass in me or, well you get the idea.

I wish I'd had a convincing counter-argument I really do. But I was hit with every reason not to enter that battle royal, 'I won't be taken seriously', 'I'm in a promotion that actually promotes wrestling, f*** that', 'the place is full of lunatics' and all I had in response, was an emotional plea.

Joe Bishop: Please, if I can't get a proper wrestler in on this tournament, then who knows what we'll end up with...

If hindsight can tell us anything, it's that my concerns were justified.

Martyn Howard: It's just not worth it, sorry Joe.

On the one hand, it was incredibly frustrating trying to convince people, and hitting a brick wall every single time. It's especially frustrating when you know who we ended up with.

On the other I suppose it was a nice reminder that I'm not the only one disillusioned with the WFWF. Attracting one, ONE, joke, I think speaks volumes. It speaks volumes about what professional wrestlers, by and large, make of this promotion. What the rest of the world thinks of us.

We're a joke.

This place, it's a s***hole. And I take no glee in saying that, it's just... the truth.

I so wish I had it in me to convince my fellow athletes verbally. I really do. It'd be much quicker. But I've never really been much of a diplomat. I've never been much of a salesman either.

Try as I might - and God knows I'm trying, futile as it is I'll keep trying – I can't convince people like this. I can't make enough inroads to topple the tidal wave of s*** that's flowing through this sport.

The only hope I have of convincing people, the only method I've ever had a talent for, is inside that twenty foot by twenty foot squared circle.

---

January 20th 2017

Andy Yates: Hugh Jass.

I completely shared the disbelief in his voice.

Andy Yates: Hugh Jass is challenging for the World Championship.

Joe Bishop: Pass me the sick bucket when you're done with it.

Andy Yates: I'm not sure I'll ever be done.

You've got to laugh really haven't you? If you don't you'll cry. The WFWF threw the gates open to the whole of the wrestling world, and this was the response. It would be f***ing hilarious if it wasn't so important.

Joe Bishop: It really does speak volumes.

He nods as I continue.

Joe Bishop: The 'greatest promotion in the world', offering a shot at the World Championship, and who turns up? Hugh Jass.

You really couldn't make it up.

Joe Bishop: Jesus Christ.

Andy Yates: If it's any consolation, there's no way they can spin this so it isn't incredibly embarassing.

Joe Bishop: Yeah... I'd still rather it hadn't happened.

Andy Yates: Of course, but if anything was going to prove your point it's this.

Not a huge consolation, but he's right. Nobody can claim this promotion is thriving and keep a straight face after failing to attract any serious talent for a spot in a tournament with as much on it as this.

Joe Bishop: I guess.

Andy Yates: Trust me, it might not end up being the worst thing in the world.

One can only hope he's right.

Joe Bishop: It's not exactly the challenge I was looking for though.

Andy Yates: You're just gonna have to make an example of him.

*Sigh*

You know, I thought I'd made enough examples already.


---

I don't think it'll surprise anyone to find out that I want to win this tournament. That I want to be the next WFWF World Champion.

And I think I want it, now more than I ever have before, for the right reasons. Because I think it can benefit everyone.

But more than anything, what I want from the Supreme Gauntlet, is to come out of it feeling like something's changed. And changed for the better.

This tournament, so far, really has been almost exactly what I wanted it to be. I'd have preferred a more serious opponent in this third fixture of course, but outside of that I'm feeling pretty positive. It's been characterized by solid wrestling matches, with clean finishes. The 'product' has never been better. Nowhere near perfect, of course, but better than the WFWF has ever been.

So it would be a crying shame, if the legacy of this competition isn't equally positive.

If we come out of this tournament, and let the Philip Schneider's and the Michael Kyzer's back into this sport with open arms. If we let people, like Austin, Hugh, Dex, carry on in spite of their woeful records in this tournament. In spite of the fact that there's athletes out there who treat it so much more seriously who aren't getting these opportunities.

It would be a crying shame if we come out of Ultimate Supremacy, with Trace Demon spearheading the same old s*** Drakz has been spearheading for two years. The same s*** Philip Schneider, Michael Kyzer, Drakz, Trace Demon, Alex Sean, EBR, every f***er I can remember has been serving up for years. Just in slightly different shades of brown.

I really am sick of it.

I'm sick of talking to serious professional wrestlers and feeling ashamed that I come from the WFWF.

Ashamed, that this is my home.

I'm sick of being associated with a company that split right down the middle, one side jokes, the other arrogant arseholes who make the President of the USA look modest.

If it's going to change for the better, then of course, there need to be grassroots changes.

Maybe some people see no harm in five minutes of Hugh, or Pepe Le Plucha, or Big McLargehuge, or Stan McMann. Maybe they think it's nice to have a built in toilet break.

But those five minutes here and there really do start to add up.

These people need to go. There can't be a place in the WFWF for people like that, because it undermines everything. It undermines any competitive element, and that really ought to be the focus.

But, more often than not, change is top down.

It's no coincidence that the likes of Jake Slash, Trace Demon, even the Hardcore Champion came out of Schneider's first reign as World Champion. That Drakz's reign has brought us nothing but people who don't take the competition seriously, because he didn't. Because he was quite happy to bend the rules to stay on top, so everyone else was.

The champion sets the standard. They set the tone for everything that happens in a promotion.

If this tournament ends with Trace Demon standing tall then, nothing's gonna change. Not really.

It is so, so important that we come out of this tournament with a World Champion who cares. A World Champion who is going to raise the bar.

Because ultimately, that's what the legacy of this tournament's gonna come down to. Is the man standing tall at the end of it someone who's going to set the tone for a better WFWF, or are they just going to be in the mould of every Champion that's come before? Stamp down on anyone who threatens them, and do nothing about the clowns who threaten our sport.

---

Andy Yates: Congrats.

There's no denying that Joe Bishop's been on a role of late. This tournament has been bringing the best out of him and so, I suppose, I should be feeling quite confident.

Everything he said he'd do, he's done. Everything he's doing in preperation, is working. At least, it is right now.

Joe Bishop: Thanks man, better start getting ready for Hugh.

It's just difficult, when somebody sows that seed of doubt, not to worry. Not to think that maybe, just maybe, you've missed something.

Andy Yates: Absolutely.

I don't know.

Poppy sees more of Joe than anyone else, she follows him round with a pen and a pad of paper all day every day. Practically anyway. Maybe she's right.

Maybe he's going too far and maybe it's gonna blow up in his face. In everybodies face.

Andy Yates: How you feeling?

Or maybe it's Poppy I should be worrying about.

She's finally starting to make some positive steps in terms of her career, and I guess I thought I could stop worrying quite so much. That she was fine.

But maybe it's her, maybe this is just in her head. Joe Bishop's fine, and she's the one obsessing.

Joe Bishop: A bit frustrated to be honest.

I'm supposed to be the guy with all the answers. The guy who tells them both how it is. What they've got to do to make everything alright.

Right now, I've got a lot more questions than I have answers.

I don't like that one bit.

Andy Yates: Yeah?

Joe Bishop: I've beaten The Future, I've beaten Austin Hayes. I feel like I've really made my point, you can't just be here for fun. And now, Hugh Jass, I mean, this isn't the match I wanted.

Andy Yates: It's the match you've got.

And now his unenthusiastic nod's got me turning 180, far from overworking, it's looking like his problem might be motivating himself for this one.

Andy Yates: Don't f*** it up feeling sorry for yourself. You knew you weren't gonna change it over night. So it's Groundhog Day again, so f***ing what? Make sure you're ready to go out there and do it again, because you don't want to come out of this looking weak.

Really didn't think I'd find myself giving this speech.

Joe Bishop: I guess.

Andy Yates: Seriously, now is not the time to start worrying about it. Get back to work, and make sure you're ready for the match you've got, not the one you want.

He potters over to the treadmill, one can only hope his head will be in the right place by the time his match comes around, because messing up here would be a really bad idea.

Guess I should take my own advice and stop worrying about it really, he's doing fine for himself. Poppy's doing fine for herself. Even if they are at each others throats.

It's just difficult to resist the temptation, to try and work out what on earth's going on here.

---

Poppy Yates: Oh for f*** sake.

Hugh Jass. Hugh f***ing Jass, and he's treating him like he's the best wrestler in the world.

Poppy Yates: Seriously? That apology really didn't mean much did it?

Joe Bishop: Do we have to do this?

Poppy Yates: No.

What's the point of trying to help him when he's too stubborn to even consider the possibility that he might not be right. He might be killing himself preparing for Hugh Jass, and that's going to take so much energy that he's all out of gas when the serious opponents come knocking. He won't even entertain the idea.

Poppy Yates: We don't have to. You want to keep working yourself into the ground then you go for it. I'm f***ing through trying to look out for you.

Joe Bishop: I really was sorry.

Poppy Yates: Well you've got a funny way of showing it.

Joe Bishop: I'm sorry that you don't get it. I'm sorry don't think it's worth it. I'm sorry if it's hurting you. But I'm not sorry that I'm doing it, I have to.

Poppy Yates: You don't though. I've known you've been overdoing it for weeks, but it's obvious to anyone just from looking at you now. Those bags under your eyes give it away. That f***ing bumfluff on your chin gives it away. And the daily painkillers might not show, but you don't have to be a genius to work out that you're struggling. It's not healthy.

And yet he's clearly not even the tiniest bit ashamed.

Poppy Yates: And for what? Hugh Jass? You really think you can't beat him if you don't give up hours of sleep, every night, constantly rewatching his one serious competitive match?

Joe Bishop: Obviously not.

Poppy Yates: So why the f*** are you doing it?

Joe Bishop: Because it's not just about beating him.

Poppy Yates: What is it about then? This isn't gonna help you beat Trace.

Joe Bishop: IT'S NOT ABOUT TRACE!

Yeah, of course it's not.

Joe Bishop: It's about changing this place.

So he keeps saying.

How putting your body through the wringer night after night is going to change anything I don't know. It hasn't exactly made much of a difference yet.

Poppy Yates: Whatever, I'm really not interested anymore. Do what you want.

Joe Bishop: Thank you merciful God.

He said under his breath, but quite deliberately loud enough for me to hear. How dare I try to help him.

Poppy Yates: I feel like I'm banging my head against a brick wall.

Joe Bishop: Yeah? Me too.

---

You know, people talk a lot about complacency. Heck, it's been a central part of the way I've prepared for this tournament. I have given Austin Hayes and Anna Ahriman the respect they've deserved and because of that, I've beaten them. I could have slipped up, in fact I'm pretty sure I would have slipped up, if I hadn't taken them seriously.

But you Hugh?

I've got to be honest. I'm pretty sure I could afford to be complacent. That I could step into that ring without thinking even for a second about you, or about what I need to do to win, and still come out victorious.

I don't mean that to sound arrogant, I wouldn't even dream of thinking it about a serious opponent... but you just aren't that. You're not a competitor, full stop. You're a Simpsons joke. You are, in traditional WFWF style, a completely unfunny comedy act.

You don't belong in this ring with me, and again that's not arrogance. You didn't belong in that ring with Trace Demon either, and you won't deserve to share a ring with Anna Ahriman.

So why am I spending so much time and effort preparing for this match? Why bother if I'm that confident that I can just turn up and beat you?

I look at this match, and I can't help but want more than just a win. More than just another point on the way to the World Championship.

Andy's right, I need to make an example of you. I need to make sure you and people like you don't step foot back in this ring. I feel like I'm saying that a lot, and it's depressing, but I can't help who they put in front of me. They keep lining up jokes and I keep knocking them down and desperately, desperately hoping it'll make a difference. That it'll change this place.

That it'll rid the WFWF of wrestlers who are here to have fun, and free up space for athletes who actually want to compete.

You're not the first opponent I've had since coming back to this place that I've wanted to get rid of. But I think you probably are, credit to you, the one I've most wanted to eliminate. The opponent who best sums up what is wrong with this promotion.

And for that, I'm sorry, but you've got to go.

Not the way Josh Dean's gone. I'm not going to go out there to hurt you. That's just not who I am. I don't need, nor do I want, to be excessively violent. I don't want to injure you to get rid of you.

But I do want to make this match so humiliating for you, that you've got no choice but to get out of my promotion. I want it to be painfully obvious to everybody, that you're out of your depth here and I want you to leave this show thinking 'I can't step foot in a WFWF ring again, not after that'.

I have been doing everything in my power to make sure I give you that kind of defeat. To make sure that there's literally no area where I can't completely outclass you.

That's exactly what I'm going to do.

And I'm aware that, you probably do know how to cope with a pretty high level of embarrassment.

But I'm backing myself to make this one shameful enough, that you just have no choice but to throw in the towel for good.

There are so many wrestlers out there, who are just completely disillusioned with this sport. With what the WFWF has become. It's a result of that discontent, coupled with Trace's inability to put you out of action, that means you and I are going to go toe to toe. You are here because of this promotion's failings, and unless I can send you on your way, you'll continue to contribute to the downward spiral.

I owe it to those wrestlers, to the fans of this sport, and to myself, to win this match and to do so comfortably. And I owe it to those people, to do absolutely everything in my power to win this tournament. To do it all, without needing to cheat, and without needing to throw an opponent onto a barricade, or go out to hurt them.

Winning this tournament, for me, means giving the WFWF a World Champion who will take on any and all challengers. A Champion who won't ever resort to cheating to keep hold of their belt. And a Champion, who can make this promotion serious again. Who can help lift it to new heights. Who can rebuild the tattered reputation of a sports body that's forgotten the rules of its sport.

So that hopefully, the next time the WFWF invites wrestlers from around the world to compete for a shot at the World Championship, we don't have to settle for a Hugh Jass.

OOC: I'm definitely glad there's a break coming to recharge because I was really beginning to feel it this show. I've struggled with this and it's a shame because I felt like I was on a nice little role. Anyway I'm very excited for the match with Trace, and the chance to start moving things along a little bit more, hopefully this at least kept peoples interest for that.