Post by Kurt Burton: Script Doctor! on Feb 16, 2007 19:53:04 GMT -5
The pulse pounding hooks of Ac-Dc’s Highway to hell play in the bedroom of one Kurt Burton. His head wrapped in bandages, he sits at the foot of his bed, furiously playing WFWF Odium on his PS2. He pins his opponent, Justin Tyger, and the match is called. He smirks to himself, and quickly turns off the TV, and flops back into his bed. He sprawls his broken body across the bed. He relaxes as he sucks beer through a straw. The straw is incredibly long reaching from his lips all the way into the Budweiser sitting on his bedside table. He lets go, and looks to his posters. He laughs, a sick little laugh, as the drums pound and the chorus kicks in. He clears his throat, and calls out.
Kurt: Kat!
A moment passes, and Kat struts through the door.
Kat: Do you need something Kurt?
Kurt: I would like some soup please.
Kat: Of course my little warrior. We hae to get you strong for your match against Skyler Striker.
Kurt: Who?
Kat: Skyler Striker.
Kurt: Isn’t that the girl from Good Will Hunting?
Kat: No. He’s your opponent on Felo-de-Se.
Kurt: Is he some goddamn rookie?
Kat: No. You’ve fought him before.
Kurt: I have?
Kat: The guy with the ripped up clothes…
She waits, it doesn’t seem to register with Kurt. She sighs, and tries again.
Kat: The fury crusader.
Kurt: Ohh… the furry crusader. Crusading for the rights of all men who dress up as stuffed animals.
Kat stares back at him.
Kat: You did that just to set up that lame joke.
Kurt: Yeah. So can I get some soup please. I am in so much pain and agony after that match with Obo last week.
Kat: Sure thing. You just rest up.
She exits the room, pulling the door behind her. He waits for a moment, until her footsteps cease to echo in the hallway. He jumps up, and turns the TV back on. The screen glows with the digitzed image of Kurt standing, lead pipe held high in the air. He exits out of the screen, and sets up his next match. He scrolls through a list of create-a-wrestlers, until he finds the man he is looking for.
Kurt: Skyler Striker. The image isn’t quite that good, I suck at creating real people on this thing. But I think I got the gist. Torn clothing, and all. We meet again Skyler, this week on Felo De Se. This match is different than our other encounters. See Skyler, we’ve fought each other, in this organization and others, and everytime, pride or honor was on the line, titles were on the line, opportunities, but this time, nothing. There is nothing on the line here. This is a pointless match booked by people trying to build amatch that we already know the outcome to. Their trying to build up their match, at Ascension, their littl tag team title match. But we know the Revolution will walk out with those belts. Just like we know this week, I will make your hand slap against the mat. It’s enevitability Mr Furry Crusader.
The loading screen finishes as the match begins. The digital Kurt rushes his opponent as the bell rings. He clotheslines striker, and slaps on a submission hold. He quickly taps the buttons, and Striker taps.
Kurt: Man, that was fast, even for a computer match. But our match probably won’t last much longer. See Striker, I’m stronger, quicker, and smarter than you are. Look at me right now. I have Kat waiting on me, hand and foot, because I made her think I got my ass royally kicked by Obo. But he only got lucky. He didn’t injure me. To the contrary, I may have lost, and I may have a few bumps and bruises, but I have never felt better. My long last tag team title, the belt I never got a rematch for, is within my grasps once more. And you, Skyler, you’re just a pathetic little stepping stone on my path to glory. And there isn’t one person in this company, and especially not you Skyler, who can stop me.
The door swings open, and Kat steps into the room, with a bowl of soup in her hand. She sees Kurt sitting on the foot of the bed.
Kat: You know Kurt, for someone who is so smart, I would think you would have remembered the air vent from this room leads into the kitchen.
Kurt: Uh oh.
Kat walks over to Kurt and smiles.
Kat: Oh, I’m not mad. Here you go baby, your nice hot soup.
She dumps the contents of the bowl onto Kurt’s crotch. Kurt cries out in pain as Kat storms furiously through the door.
Kurt: Kat!
A moment passes, and Kat struts through the door.
Kat: Do you need something Kurt?
Kurt: I would like some soup please.
Kat: Of course my little warrior. We hae to get you strong for your match against Skyler Striker.
Kurt: Who?
Kat: Skyler Striker.
Kurt: Isn’t that the girl from Good Will Hunting?
Kat: No. He’s your opponent on Felo-de-Se.
Kurt: Is he some goddamn rookie?
Kat: No. You’ve fought him before.
Kurt: I have?
Kat: The guy with the ripped up clothes…
She waits, it doesn’t seem to register with Kurt. She sighs, and tries again.
Kat: The fury crusader.
Kurt: Ohh… the furry crusader. Crusading for the rights of all men who dress up as stuffed animals.
Kat stares back at him.
Kat: You did that just to set up that lame joke.
Kurt: Yeah. So can I get some soup please. I am in so much pain and agony after that match with Obo last week.
Kat: Sure thing. You just rest up.
She exits the room, pulling the door behind her. He waits for a moment, until her footsteps cease to echo in the hallway. He jumps up, and turns the TV back on. The screen glows with the digitzed image of Kurt standing, lead pipe held high in the air. He exits out of the screen, and sets up his next match. He scrolls through a list of create-a-wrestlers, until he finds the man he is looking for.
Kurt: Skyler Striker. The image isn’t quite that good, I suck at creating real people on this thing. But I think I got the gist. Torn clothing, and all. We meet again Skyler, this week on Felo De Se. This match is different than our other encounters. See Skyler, we’ve fought each other, in this organization and others, and everytime, pride or honor was on the line, titles were on the line, opportunities, but this time, nothing. There is nothing on the line here. This is a pointless match booked by people trying to build amatch that we already know the outcome to. Their trying to build up their match, at Ascension, their littl tag team title match. But we know the Revolution will walk out with those belts. Just like we know this week, I will make your hand slap against the mat. It’s enevitability Mr Furry Crusader.
The loading screen finishes as the match begins. The digital Kurt rushes his opponent as the bell rings. He clotheslines striker, and slaps on a submission hold. He quickly taps the buttons, and Striker taps.
Kurt: Man, that was fast, even for a computer match. But our match probably won’t last much longer. See Striker, I’m stronger, quicker, and smarter than you are. Look at me right now. I have Kat waiting on me, hand and foot, because I made her think I got my ass royally kicked by Obo. But he only got lucky. He didn’t injure me. To the contrary, I may have lost, and I may have a few bumps and bruises, but I have never felt better. My long last tag team title, the belt I never got a rematch for, is within my grasps once more. And you, Skyler, you’re just a pathetic little stepping stone on my path to glory. And there isn’t one person in this company, and especially not you Skyler, who can stop me.
The door swings open, and Kat steps into the room, with a bowl of soup in her hand. She sees Kurt sitting on the foot of the bed.
Kat: You know Kurt, for someone who is so smart, I would think you would have remembered the air vent from this room leads into the kitchen.
Kurt: Uh oh.
Kat walks over to Kurt and smiles.
Kat: Oh, I’m not mad. Here you go baby, your nice hot soup.
She dumps the contents of the bowl onto Kurt’s crotch. Kurt cries out in pain as Kat storms furiously through the door.
