Devilkiller
Main Eventer
WFWF. Go see about it.
Joined on: Mar 17, 2012 16:49:19 GMT -5
Posts: 1,869
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Post by Devilkiller on Jan 27, 2015 22:56:18 GMT -5
The motion carries! The people demand answers! Yeah. If by people you mean one person that's on the lower end of the totem pole. Then yes, I, the people, want answers. |
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Devilkiller
Main Eventer
WFWF. Go see about it.
Joined on: Mar 17, 2012 16:49:19 GMT -5
Posts: 1,869
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Post by Devilkiller on Jan 27, 2015 22:05:58 GMT -5
Waitwaitwaitwaitwait...wait...wait!!!! What the actual f*ck ever happened with that e-fed Hot or Not site that was going to read and review Superbrawl and get us all up on their rating system or whatever? I second this. |
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Devilkiller
Main Eventer
WFWF. Go see about it.
Joined on: Mar 17, 2012 16:49:19 GMT -5
Posts: 1,869
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Post by Devilkiller on Jan 27, 2015 21:32:04 GMT -5
I accept my award for Manliest Wrestler of 2014. Push. Push. Push. Push. |
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Devilkiller
Main Eventer
WFWF. Go see about it.
Joined on: Mar 17, 2012 16:49:19 GMT -5
Posts: 1,869
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Post by Devilkiller on Jan 27, 2015 21:28:11 GMT -5
Working on the SUMMIT PRO Tag Team Grand Prix First Stage; along with a special announcement. Could be a while before it drops though. This is quite ambitious; a lot of effort has gone into it and I'm still three matches away from completion...really hoping to finalise it soon... Dude, I've had 4 matches left for like, 3 months now.. Plus I'm with WFWF, I'm trying to split my time up. |
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Devilkiller
Main Eventer
WFWF. Go see about it.
Joined on: Mar 17, 2012 16:49:19 GMT -5
Posts: 1,869
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Post by Devilkiller on Jan 26, 2015 19:52:16 GMT -5
I'm gonna be so pissed if Cena doesn't come out in a classic military jeep with Tony at Wrestlemania Which game was that? 09? |
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Devilkiller
Main Eventer
WFWF. Go see about it.
Joined on: Mar 17, 2012 16:49:19 GMT -5
Posts: 1,869
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Post by Devilkiller on Jan 26, 2015 16:42:03 GMT -5
I'll write mine if Whitner doesn't want too.
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Devilkiller
Main Eventer
WFWF. Go see about it.
Joined on: Mar 17, 2012 16:49:19 GMT -5
Posts: 1,869
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Post by Devilkiller on Jan 26, 2015 15:49:11 GMT -5
I'm a Stan McMann mark now. Push this man to the moon. This man deserves a title match. Make it a triple threat! #HijackWFWF |
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Devilkiller
Main Eventer
WFWF. Go see about it.
Joined on: Mar 17, 2012 16:49:19 GMT -5
Posts: 1,869
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Post by Devilkiller on Jan 26, 2015 15:43:29 GMT -5
I don't take credit for the match, I let Thornstowe write it. Give him the recognition.
Good job to everyone. Great show and I'm psyched for the next one.
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Devilkiller
Main Eventer
WFWF. Go see about it.
Joined on: Mar 17, 2012 16:49:19 GMT -5
Posts: 1,869
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Post by Devilkiller on Jan 25, 2015 9:20:54 GMT -5
Finally about to get that mustang in the coming weeks. So excited. I went out and bought a Pioneer CD player with USB and Aux ports, bought one of those "car lover" packs to clean it up nice and good when I get it. First thing I'm doing is saving up to paint it Candy Apple Red.
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Devilkiller
Main Eventer
WFWF. Go see about it.
Joined on: Mar 17, 2012 16:49:19 GMT -5
Posts: 1,869
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Post by Devilkiller on Jan 20, 2015 17:30:10 GMT -5
Bastille without the T...  -  Damn you and your cleverness.... Its a very ethnic Greek name for anyone who give a fudge......... Greek/Jew...I dare you to make to make a joke out of that... Don't challenge him. |
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Devilkiller
Main Eventer
WFWF. Go see about it.
Joined on: Mar 17, 2012 16:49:19 GMT -5
Posts: 1,869
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Post by Devilkiller on Jan 20, 2015 15:35:36 GMT -5
Any drummers in the house? Need some help.
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Devilkiller
Main Eventer
WFWF. Go see about it.
Joined on: Mar 17, 2012 16:49:19 GMT -5
Posts: 1,869
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Post by Devilkiller on Jan 18, 2015 17:12:15 GMT -5
It's gonna be a miracle if I find the time to sit down and finish my RP. It's a giant turd right now. How is that any different from the rest of your roleplays? Ah, Schneider. I can always count on you to make a good comeback. |
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Devilkiller
Main Eventer
WFWF. Go see about it.
Joined on: Mar 17, 2012 16:49:19 GMT -5
Posts: 1,869
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Post by Devilkiller on Jan 18, 2015 10:04:48 GMT -5
Go ahead man
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Devilkiller
Main Eventer
WFWF. Go see about it.
Joined on: Mar 17, 2012 16:49:19 GMT -5
Posts: 1,869
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Post by Devilkiller on Jan 18, 2015 5:12:52 GMT -5
Can anyone talk? Preferably text, someone that has my number or wants it. Feeling really down and out for no reason and just want someone there..
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Devilkiller
Main Eventer
WFWF. Go see about it.
Joined on: Mar 17, 2012 16:49:19 GMT -5
Posts: 1,869
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Post by Devilkiller on Jan 18, 2015 5:12:15 GMT -5
Writing matches for WFWF takes hella time bruh Yes it does. |
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Devilkiller
Main Eventer
WFWF. Go see about it.
Joined on: Mar 17, 2012 16:49:19 GMT -5
Posts: 1,869
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Post by Devilkiller on Jan 17, 2015 11:53:29 GMT -5
Alright, here's my thoughts:
You have some good strong points. I kind of like the whole pissed off attitude that Jayson is feeling. It gives it a nice, genuine feeling. If I were a wrestler, and I lost my title I would be mad and devastated. Here's one thing, maybe it's just me, but when Chase came to the door, you wouldn't want Jayson showing weakness. When he gave the courtesy wait at 9 and 10, that wouldn't have happened in real life. If something was ripped away from you and you think the reason it happened was standing in front of you, you would've slammed the door in his face earlier than 10.
I'm left confused with the Chase London angle at the end as well. Frustrates me. Arg. You. -.- anyway, the dialogue is "chalky" (using a Brennan word), it seems kind of, I don't know. It's like those independent movies without any emotion. That's how I read it. Work on fine tuning that.
The advice I have is read it. Re-read it atleast one, if not 2 or 3 times. I read mine 6 times, and I still had missteps. I half-heartedly cringed when I read "hear" instead of "here". But that's me and my nitpickyness.
It's a pretty decent RP mate, just read and keep fine tuning what you have and you'll be getting better at this, for sure.
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Devilkiller
Main Eventer
WFWF. Go see about it.
Joined on: Mar 17, 2012 16:49:19 GMT -5
Posts: 1,869
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Post by Devilkiller on Jan 17, 2015 11:37:38 GMT -5
This is a really good read. For those that have the time read this in it's entirety. I like the first scene, Dan seeing the Father and making it all a dream, it means somewhere deep inside of Dan he knows the answers to all the questions he has, he just has to dig down deep in his gut and get them. I also really enjoy how you make David focus on certain events, such as the New Epoch, and you make it mean so much to David to get a chance at Drakz. This RP is well-thought out for sure. Some GREAT stuff in here. Goodluck mate!
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Devilkiller
Main Eventer
WFWF. Go see about it.
Joined on: Mar 17, 2012 16:49:19 GMT -5
Posts: 1,869
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Post by Devilkiller on Jan 17, 2015 11:25:36 GMT -5
This was one hell of a piece. For my first time reading an RP, I was confused on if you accidentally posted an RP for an older show, but as I kept reading, oh my god man, you have skill. You have the drive and determination to write things like this and it's simply amazing. This RP was a nice display of what people should be writing after years of doing this, not a few months. I am impressed as hell, no wonder you're the National champion. You're going places. Believe you in me. I, much like Brennan (Bismo) can't wait to see what you pull out of your hat of tricks when better writers are thrown your way. Keep this up man.
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Devilkiller
Main Eventer
WFWF. Go see about it.
Joined on: Mar 17, 2012 16:49:19 GMT -5
Posts: 1,869
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Post by Devilkiller on Jan 17, 2015 11:20:52 GMT -5
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Devilkiller
Main Eventer
WFWF. Go see about it.
Joined on: Mar 17, 2012 16:49:19 GMT -5
Posts: 1,869
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Post by Devilkiller on Jan 16, 2015 21:41:31 GMT -5
So don't ask me why, but whenever anyone writes a shrink these days, I always hear Dominic West in my head from the opening skit on Eminem's "Relapse" album. Given the fact that I've trumped through five separate shrinks in my day, that doesn't make any sense because I actually have a realistic focal point for the scenario, but anyway... ...for a first shot back, this wasn't bad. If you press on, I think you'll get the hang of writing on a mobile - I do mine exclusively on my iPhone now. There's a few missteps here - some of the dialogue is kinda chalky, and I kinda cringed at "I just quit my pot addiction", but to get your Devilkiller feet wet again, this wasn't a total loss. If I could give you a piece advice, it would be to give yourself an end point - not in the fed, but in your own story. It makes it a lot easier to fill in the gaps and get from cover to cover. Also, where you're kinda trying out a down and out, troubled character, pick a couple of harsh flaws you want him have and really study them (DON'T live them - personal experience) to get a feel for how they'd affect his every day life. From there, it's gravy. Good luck. Welcome back. Thanks for the feedback man. I really appreciate it. I hope it ends up good. I'll definitely try to apply this to my next RP. Thanks again man! |
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