Ramos
Main Eventer
Joined on: Sept 19, 2007 13:58:31 GMT -5
Posts: 2,264
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Post by Ramos on Mar 22, 2007 14:17:18 GMT -5
The camera gradually lights up and we here Moby Dick by Led Zeppelin playing.We see 'The Showstoppa' Ruairidh Gauld is in the middle of a gym. He is punching a punchbag. He takes one big swing and nails it with a big left haymaker. The bag falls and there[ is a big thud as the bag hits the ground. He turns around to face the camera and begins to talk.
Gauld: Robbie Jay, you come back to WFWF thinking you are all high ad mighty. But you see I have also been here on WFWF but I quit because I got given a **** gimmick and a **** tag team partner. So at House Show 22 you better be ready for the beating of your life.
He flares his nostrils and then starts to talk again.
I will show you and the rest of WFWF why I am called the Showstoppa. I will prove that I am the best damn wrestler in the world. I will school you in the world of wrestling. And when I have you on that top rope you just better say your last prayer to God Almighty and hope that you survive the match that will stop the show. You will regret stepping into the ring with me and I will prove that I am that Damn good.
Gauld walks out of the gym and we hear Moby Dick fade out and the camera turns to black.
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Ramos
Main Eventer
Joined on: Sept 19, 2007 13:58:31 GMT -5
Posts: 2,264
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Post by Ramos on Mar 22, 2007 14:19:28 GMT -5
OOC: The stuff I said about being with a crap partner and having a crap character was just a little thing to fuel my character's anger.
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Yukio Blaze
Main Eventer
WFWF Record: 58-54-03-02
Joined on: Dec 15, 2004 21:50:34 GMT -5
Posts: 4,515
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Post by Yukio Blaze on Mar 22, 2007 14:36:45 GMT -5
Alright, you have the potential of being a top guy within the HS league and a FDS superstar.
All you need to remember is never mention the camera in rps. Its a un-written no-no rule in the WFWF. You need to expand in description and speech. You can do that by looking at others rp for inspiration towards future rps from you. Another no-no is the cussing since your a face. You gotta be what is good and pure. You can use a few curse words, but just kinda tone them down only when needed.
While this was good for starting out, you will expand as you move along
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Ramos
Main Eventer
Joined on: Sept 19, 2007 13:58:31 GMT -5
Posts: 2,264
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Post by Ramos on Mar 22, 2007 14:42:09 GMT -5
Thanks for the feedback Yukio I will try to Improve. Thanks for the feedback.
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Post by cureforthesickness on Mar 23, 2007 2:23:44 GMT -5
It's okay, for a base roleplay. Instead of just promo'ing, tell a story. Have something going on and make the match relate to that. Instead of just saying "you're my opponent so I hate you and I'm gonna beat you up" make it mean something. Show exactly why you are better, what your beef with your opponent is, and how you're going to settle it.
This may sound odd, but you're a wrestling charecter. Rely less on wrestling and more on charecter. Anyone can say "I'm a wrestler, I'm gonna beat you up" and there's always going to be someone who can do it better than you. What you need to do is expand beyond that.
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Calvin
Main Eventer
visit my myspace and listen to my music
Joined on: Dec 18, 2001 15:13:21 GMT -5
Posts: 3,791
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Post by Calvin on Mar 27, 2007 0:28:06 GMT -5
I think I counted three different wwe catch phrases in this rp. nothing really important...but it kinda annoys me to see someone using something like that. But that's just my opinion.
A gym is extremely generic. Think creative....and think relative to your character. And those are the settings to use. Be specific too with your description. I also kinda find it a little unreal to break the punching bag right off the string.
Speech is well, not too great. I'll be honest. All I got out of this was grrrr I'm mad I'm gonna beat you up but re phrased with wwe catch phrases. Try to make up your own phrases if that's what you're gonna go with. I don't really use one, because they get old fast. You gotta go into depth and like....expand on what you're trying to prove to us. Make a point and prove it. Make a theme. That's what rps are about. Dont' just say I'mma gonna beat you up! because that just sounds too like....general and generic. Anyone can say that. Anyone can do that. Think out of the box. Think creative. And that's where good rps come from.
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