Post by Thunder on May 9, 2009 0:35:10 GMT -5
crap blows up.
Matthew Werner: Good evening and welcome to Battleground! We have quite the show which will cap off with a crazy main event.
Matt Steel: It’ll be a cluster
.Werner glares at him.
Matt Steel: Hey, at least I’m honest.
Matthew Werner: It’s time for our opening match.
The opening match (which never got written *ahem*) was indeed a back-and-forth competitive match, although in the end ICU was able to pick up the victory over Jon Odeeves.
Bennett: ...sounds good.
Bennett extends his hand out to a man around the corner, and the two men shake the others hand. The camera view changes to the ring as Polyamorous by Breaking Benjamin blares over the PA system as Drake Legend enter through the curtain. Drake slowly walks down the ramp. "So... Just when you think that you're alright, I'm calling out from the inside, I never heard anyone, I never listen at all." Drake raises both fists and two fireworks shoot up from behind him. Drake keeps walking down the entrance giving the crowd dirty looks and slapping hand out of the way. "They've come to get me again, The cloud is over my head, My polyamorous friend, Got me in a mess of trouble again." Drake smirks at the crowd as he climbs up the steel steps and proceeds to enter the ring. Drake goes to the top rope and raises his fists and lowers his heads as the fans happily boo him.
Across 26 Winters plays and Ace Bennett slowly makes his way down the ring. He high fives all the people who have their hands extended. Bennett rolls under the ropes, stands up and raises his arms in the air.
The ref calls for the bell, and the two men start circling the ring, trying to size each other up. They touch hands a few times, then Bennett outstretches his arms, asking for a test of strength. Legend accepts the challenge, and the two lock hands above their head. Bennett gets the upper hand, getting Drake to a knee. Drake's body then locks momentarily, then he gets a second wind per se and works his way back to his feet. He pulls the hands down, bends Bennett's wrists backwards, and manages to get him off of his feet. He then drops him, and Bennett lands on his knees. Legend then lifts his foot swiftly and kicks Bennett dead in the face. Bennett falls backwards on his knees, clutching his face. Legend goes to work, stomping all over Bennett. He bounces off of the ropes and drops a knee right into Bennett's temple. Legend picks up Bennett and starts throwing knees to his chest and face. Bennett's head jerks back, and Legend proceeds to chop Bennett's chest raw. Bennett falls into the turnbuckle, and Legend Irish Whips Bennett into the opposite turnbuckle. Legend charges, but crashes into the turnbuckle as Bennett has flipped out of the ring onto the apron. Outside the ropes, Bennett grabs Legend's head and starts bashing it on the turnbuckle until the ref gets to a four count. Legend falls backwards, as Bennett ascends the turnbuckle. He leaps off and drops a beautiful leg drop on Legend. He rolls on top of Legend and hooks both legs.
1...2…
Legend gets a shoulder up at 2! Bennett sits Legend up and goes behind him and puts him in a headlock. It lasts just seconds, as Bennett rakes Drake's eyes and releases the hold. Bennett gets to his feet and wipes his hands together. He gets into a fighting stance as Legend uses the ropes to get up. Legend puts his fists up too, and throws the first punch and connects to Bennett's face. Bennett then throws a duke and catches Legend right below the eye. Then Legend connects. Then Bennett. Then Legend. Bennett throws another punch, but Legend blocks it and nails Bennett with a hard punch. The same thing happens again, but this time, Bennett staggers and Legend takes advantage, hitting a jump side kick to the chest of Ace, sending him crashing to the mat. Legend puts his hand around his neck, still recovering from that leg drop. He gets over it fast though as he sees Bennett rolling around. Bennett pulls himself up in the corner of the ring. Legend charges, but Bennett jumps up onto the turnbuckle and leaps off, Legend missing him and crashing into the turnbuckle.
Bennett takes advantage and gets Legend to the top rope backwards. Bennett gets to the top rope with him, puts his hands together like he is praying, and then hits the Syracuse Bomb on Legend, knocking him out cold. Bennett cockily covers Legend.
1...2...3
Keri Thames: Here is your winner....ACE BENNETT!
Matthew Werner: Big win for Bennett there.
Matt Steel: But what was that handshake about?
Matthew Werner: No clue.
"LET ME ENLIGHTEN YOU...THIS IS THE WAY I PRAY..."
With those words, the chorus of "Prayer" by Disturbed fills the arena, and the crowd turns their attention to the entrance. Moving quickly through the curtains, Aaron Ashton moves onto the stage, looking through his sunglasses at the cheering crowd. Pausing briefly at the top of the ramp, he smiles, hands on his hips. Moving down the ramp, he slaps hands with fans on either side of the aisle. Reaching the ring, he slides under the bottom rope, moving toward the turnbuckle. As he climbs to the middle rope, he looks at the crowd, removing his sunglasses. Smiling, he steps down into the ring, backing into a corner, handing the timekeeper his glasses.
The guitar riff hits, the lights dim, and the crowd grows still. Over and Under by Egypt Central finally hits and a single bright white spotlight resonates from the rafters as The High Horror comes out from behind the curtain and throws both arms out to his side like a razor as red, white, and blue fireworks erupt from the stage and light up the arena, the fans now screaming loudly and cheering on Horror. The lights come back on, still dim, as Horror makes his way down the ramp, slapping hands with a few of the fans. He walks over to the side of the ring with the announce table and climbs onto the apron and stares out into space for a moment. He then directs his attention to the announce table, points at Matt Steel and pulls his hand back, making a quick cut throat motion and shines a crooked smile, and then steps over the ropes and into the ring. Horror runs the ropes a few times then throws his arms out like a razor again, but in the same motion, raises his right arm like he was preparing a chokeslam, and the crowd goes crazy again.
Matthew Werner: Here we go...no rules!
Matt Steel: Ya, ya. I just hope Horror falls off of something high and horrible. Hehe....get it?
Matthew Werner:
Horror and Ashton tie up immediately at the bell. Horror easily takes over and puts Aaron in a DDT like facelock and cranks on the hold tighter. Ashton punches at Horror’s gut and ribs with his free hand in an attempt to break Horror’s hold on him. Horror releases the hold to stop the punching. Horror quickly attempts an open-palm uppercut on Ashton, but Ashton gets his elbow up high enough and wacks Horror right in the jaw…hard enough to
send the big man staggering. Ashton then delivers a perfect dropkick to Horror’s stomach, Horror folding and falling through the ropes and out to the padded floor below.
Matthew Werner: And so it begins.
Matt Steel: It began to minutes ago you idiot.
Matthew Werner: Ya but they…..oh never mind.
By this time Horror has managed to pull himself to his feet. Ashton grips the ropes tightly, then hurls himself over the ropes sideways, crashing into Horror. However, Horror manages to catch Ashton with some struggle and then plows ahead, smashing Ashton between him and the ring apron, Ashton grimaced in pain. Horror gets his head under Ashton’s arm and lifts him up, twirls around, and plants Ashton onto the floor. Horror goes 360 on Ashton, stomping on every visible part possible. “The King of Dread” then walks over to the announcer’s table and starts ripping all the stuff off of it. Matt Steel tries to get in Dread’s way, but is shoved back into his seat, Horror waging his finger at him.
Matthew Werner: BURN!!!
Matt Steel: Haha, you!
Matthew Werner: I don’t think you can say on this show, Matt.
Matt Steel: I can say whatever the I want. I own this place.
Matthew Werner: Ya…that’s why you are one of the lowly commentators.
Matt Steel: Touché.
Horror turns around and is clocked with a monitor he threw off the table.
Matt Steel: Haha, that’s what you get you er.
Horror falls backwards onto the table and Ashton pounds on Horror’s chest until the monitor breaks. Ashton then gets onto the table with Horror and gingerly lifts him up. Ashton locks Horror in that DDT facelock thing, but this time, hooks Horror’s arm up over his head. With much power, Ashton manages to get the big man up in suplex position, but then drops Horror forward with a sitdown-facebuster, the table breaking under them. Ashton rolls out and gets to his feet. Ashton picks the big man up and rolls him into the ring, then gets into the ring himself and covers him.
1….2…
Kick out at two! Ashton hooks Horror’s right leg up over his head, grips tightly and stands, bending and stretching Horror’s leg in an uncomfortable direction. Ashton then drops Horrors leg, causing Horror to thud on the mat. Aaron then drops a fist smack dab in the middle of Horror’s face. Ashton picks Horror up as quickly as he can, but Horror lifts his leg high and hard, sending his boot into the “mint section” of Ashton, both of them falling over in pain. Ashton is in the fetal position, rocking back and forth while Horror is sitting up and trying to get his head back on straight. Moments later, Horror rolls backwards and gets to his feet, ready to fight. Horror looks at Ashton, seeing he is still down and gets a hearty laugh at his expense. Horror then bends over and wraps Ashton up tightly, then stands up straight and launches Ashton up and over his head, planting him with a German Suplex. Horror released him in mid air though, and had enough force behind it and Ashton flipped in the air, so when he crashed down, it was face first. Horror runs his fingers through his long, straggly hair, then drops on his back and rolls out of the ring, and checks under the apron. He pulls out a table and a garbage can with lid. He sets up the table and then rolls back into the ring with the can. By this time, Ashton has gotten to his knees. Horror takes that can and drives it into Ashton’s skull. Ashton falls forward, the can still formed and attached around his skull. Horror then rolls out of the ring and pulls out a twenty foot solid steel ladder and slides it under the ropes and into the ring. Dread then peeks under the ring again and comes up with a steel chair. He takes that chair and rolls into the ring. He then stands up and holds the chair up high, screaming, and the crowd getting behind him. Horror swings the chair down and hits Ashton in the back of the head with the chair.
Matt Steel: Night night.
1….2…..
Ashton somehow kicks out at two! Dread gets to his knees and looks at Ashton, and then gives a quick clap to Aaron for being able to get out of that. Horror pulls Ashton up and positions him for a scoop slam, but Ashton wriggles backwards and rakes the eyes of High Horror. Ashton then falls, twists, and low-blows Horror swiftly, both men falling to the mat again.
Matthew Werner: Dirty move that was.
Matt Steel: Turnabout is fair play.
Matthew Werner: Matt, I think that is the most intelligent thing I have ever heard you say.
Matt Steel: What can I say? I’m the philosostofical type.
Matthew Werner: “…”
Horror is the first one to his feet as he steadies himself and sets up that ladder next to the ropes. He then rolls Ashton out of the ring. Hen they are out of the ring, Ashton charges at Horror, but Horror falls and hits a perfect drop-toe hold and Ashton’s face ricochets off of the steel steps. Horror picks him up and sets him up against the table and cracks him in the head with the garbage can lid. Ashton, lights out, falls onto the table. Dread smiles as he sees he has drawn blood on Ashton. He then rolls into the ring
and slowly begins to ascend the twenty foot ladder. Dread gets to the top and then gingerly turns around, raising his arms in the air.
Matthew Werner: What the hell is he thinking?
Matt Steel: I know exactly what he is thinking. But even Horror is not THAT stupid.
Matthew Werner: Are you sure about that?
Matt Steel: I really don’t know…
Horror stares at Steel, almost as if he were assuring him that he IS that stupid. Dread crouches, and launches himself full on backwards and hits a beautiful moonsault onto Ashton outside of the ring, Ashton going through the table. The crowd and the announcers are in a stunned silence at either Horror’s bravery or stupidity, though all are on their feet. Dread, broken, lies on top of a shattered Aaron Ashton, who lies upon the broken bits of a table that seems to have remnants throughout the arena. The ref rolls out of the ring to check on the two men, and calls for the medics and any other help. The medics and a few other refs come to aid the downed superstars. Everyone looks concerned, but then the ref does remind them that this match IS still going on, but the medics ignore him and examine the two. Dread tries to shake them off, but he is too weak to, and Ashton simply isn’t moving. The medics carefully help Horror to his feet, THEN he shakes them off, and walks over to Ashton, lifts him up lightly and rolls him into the ring. The ref shrugs and climbs back in himself. Horror lies across Ashton.
1…2…
Ashton gets a shoulder up at two! Every single person in the arena, including Horror and the ref gasp at Ashton’s resiliency. Dread, clutching his ribs when he can, wanting to just end this, picks up Ashton and wraps both of his hands around the throat of Ashton. He hoists Ashton up in attempt of the Dreadful Acts, but Ashton manages to pull his feet up and nail a sloppy but effective Frankensteiner on The High Horror. Ashton grabs onto
the ladder and pulls it down, it crashing on Horror. Then, really only running on fumes and bleeding profusely, Ashton picks up Horror and Irish Whips him onto the turnbuckle backwards. He then steps out of the ring, up onto the turnbuckle, bends over and wraps his arms around Horror’s waist. He then leaps forward in a front flip, stealing one of The High Horror’s old signature moves, the Concussion. He luckily lands on top of Horror for the cover.
1….2….
The High Horror muscles out at two! Ashton pounds on the canvas and seems to have tears welling up inside of his eyes, probably wishing Horror would just drop over dead already.
Matthew Werner: Man…Ashton is just not giving up in there. He gets beat down, and keeps on coming, and evident with that last move, harder and harder.
Matt Steel: Ya…and as much as it kills me, I gotta give it up for Horror too. That stupid bastard would die before give up.
Matthew Werner: Matt….did you just say something somewhat nice about High Horror?
Matt Steel: Momentary slip. Won’t happen again.
Ashton sits Horror up and puts him in a very weak headlock. However, Horror is so drained, he is almost unable to break that hold.
Ashton rolls and picks up the dented garbage can and rolls back, setting it in the middle of the ring. He uses hat strength he has left to open it back up again. He then sets it on top of the downed ladder. He goes over to Horror and picks him up and leans him against the turnbuckle momentarily as he turns around to put the finishing touches on his bloody masterpiece. He turns around to put an end to Horror when Horror nails Aaron Ashton square in the chin with the most beautiful and flawless Savate Kicks you will ever see. Ashton floats backwards and falls down hard on the ladder and trash can, his shoulders on the mat. Horror falls on top of Ashton.
1…2…3
Keri Thames: Here is your winner….The High Horror!
Afterwards, both men shake hands in a show of respect.
The arena goes dark. Suddenly, Oasis' "Fu*kin' in the Bushes" begins to take over the PA System. As soon as the heavy guitar and drums start, the lights in the arena begin to flash quckly, blue and white. The words "We put this festival on, you bastards!...With a lot of love.... We waited one year for you fu*king pigs....And you want to break our walls down? Or fu*king destroy us?........Well, you go to hell!" shoot through the arena. Davey Sanchez then busts through the curtain and makes his way down the ramp, ignoring the fans' cheers, boos and "welcome backs". He slowly approaches the apron and pauses. He looks over to both sides and slowly takes off his trench coat. He then rolls into the ring and crawls to a nearby corner. He turns around and sits in the corner, waiting for the match to begin.
The arena lights fall as shades of red fill the entrance way, as the sound of "Hold Me, Thrill Me, Kiss Me, Kill Me" breaks the silence of the arena. Vanessa quickly motions out of the entrance curtain and quickly makes her way to the ring. Vanessa leaps onto apron and jumps over the ropes and leaps into the ring.
Vanessa enters the ring and Sanchez wastes no time and begins an assualt. Sanchez sends Vanessa into the ropes, but Vanessa comes flying back with a high-legged clothesline sending Sanchez into the mat. Quickly removing her entrance coat, Vanessa follows with a leg drop; hooking Sanchez' leg, Vanessa covers.
1...
2... Sanchez kicks out. Vanessa reels him by the hair, but Sanchez picks Vanessa up and spears her into the corner. Sanchez pummels Vanessa with forearm shots across the jaw. Sanchez sends Vanessa to the opposite corner, Vanessa bounces back hard, and Sanchez follows with a snap suplex and bridges for the cover.
1...
2... Vanessa kicks out. Sanchez picks Vanessa, but Vanessa pushes Sanchez off and hits him with a dragon kick. Holding him by the hair, Vanessa hits him with a step-over shining wizard. Sancez motions to the outside and Vanessa leaps into the ropes and takes air with a seated senton, but Sanchez catches her and sets her up for a powerbomb over the guard rail, but Vanessa pummels shots across Sanchez face and sends him over the security rail with a hurricanrana. Slightly dazed, Sanchez reaches for a chair, but Vanessa hits him with another dragon kick, before motioning back inside the ring.
The referee begins the ten count for Sanchez.
1...
2...
3...
4... Vanessa picks her spot, bounces off the ropes, and charges towards the referee, the referee ducks, Vanessa leaps off his back into the top rope and takes air into the first couple rows with a springboard 450 spalsh right into Davey Sanchez.
Both Vanessa and Sanchez are out. The referee begins the count.
1...
2...
3...
4...
5...
6...
7...
8...
9...
10...
No Contest by Count Out
Medics and officials open the barrier and rush to Vanessa and Sanchez. Vanessa's husband, Wayne McGurk, makes his way to his wife's side as the medics take her backstage.
Next month . . .
All those who have never held the WFWF Title will get a chance at it.
But first they must be the one only to survive . . .
SURVIVAL OF THE FITTEST
Keri Thames: The following contest is the War Games Match. The rules are as follows. Two men will start the match and after that a new man will enter every two minutes. The match can end by pinfall or submission, but only after all twelve men have entered the ring. The man who scores the winning fall will receive a WFWF title shot. If Thunder does so, he gets to choose who gets the shot.
Matthew Werner: Got all that?
Matt Steel: My head hurts.
“Cult of Personality” by Living Colour begins to play.
Keri Thames: Introducing first, participant number one. He is from New York City and is the current WFWF World Heavyweight Champion, THUNDER!!!
Thunder, looking very angry, works his way down to the ring. There is no arrogance or taunting, making his entrance even more generic than usual.
Matthew Werner: There’s someone who’s not happy.
Matt Steel: What do you expect? Would you want to go in there number one and have to go through eleven other guys?
Matthew Werner: No, but I’m not a wrestler.
Matt Steel: What you meant to say was “No, because I’m a ****.”
Matthew Werner: Quit putting words in my mouth.
Matt Steel: You mean like how you like penises in your mouth?
Matthew Werner: Wow. Just, wow.
Kari Thames: And now, participant number—
Wayne McGurk runs at full speed into the cage, where he hits Thunder with a series of right hands before sending him into the corner. He bounces off hard, right back into the hands of McGurk, who sends him face-first into the cage.
Matt Steel: Wow. He really got screwed with the order of the participants.
Matthew Werner: You think?
Matt Steel: You don’t have to get all bitchy about it.
Thunder is already bleeding, but that’s not the end of his punishment. Now McGurk takes his face and rakes in back and forth across the steel until he is screaming in pain, all the while opening his cut up even more. He then throws Thunder into the cage one more time and gives him a spinebuster after he bounces off.
Matthew Werner: I think Thunder is regretting the things he did to Wayne’s family right now.
Matt Steel: Nah. He’s got this whole thing under control.
Matthew Werner: Doesn’t look like it.
Matt Steel: Don’t worry about it. He’s got this thing.
Reaching his feet, Thunder starts to climb the cage to get away. This is, of course, a poor idea seeing as there’s a top to it. McGurk simply grabs him as he climbs and hits a jackhammer.
Matt Steel: Okay, so maybe it’s not looking very good right now.
Matthew Werner: This, kids, is what happens when you mess with another man’s wife.
Matt Steel: And that’s why you mess with another man’s wife in private, not public.
Matthew Werner: Wow.
Matt Steel: Did I say that out loud?
The buzzer sounds, indicating the third participant is about to enter.
It’s Saku.
Matthew Werner: That’s awfully lucky for Thunder. He would have been wheeled out on a stretcher soon.
McGurk has no choice but to turn his attention to Saku. The two exchange lefts and rights before McGurk is able to block one. He sends Saku into the ropes and hits him with a big boot. Almost immediately after this, Thunder sneaks up behind McGurk and low blows him.
Matt Steel: See, I told you he’d recover.
Matthew Werner: With a low blow.
Matt Steel: Hey, all’s fair in love and war. See what I did there. Since it’s called a War Games Match I—
Matthew Werner: Yeah, I get it.
Thunder celebrates his attack on McGurk, but doesn’t waste too much time before going back to work on him. He hits him with a series of elbows in the corner before hitting him with a short-armed clothesline. Once again he climbs the turnbuckles to celebrate his new-found life.
Matt Steel: What a comeback. It’s a miracle.
Matthew Werner: Oh shut up.
Matt Steel: That’s not very professional of you.
By this time Saku has recovered and his back on his feet. This, obviously leads to some double teaming. Thunder calls the shots, getting Saku to climb to the top rope. Once there, the two execute a spike piledriver on McGurk. They then high-five each other, reveling in the destruction of McGurk.
Matthew Werner: The Regime sure is standing tall right now.
Matt Steel: Duh. They’re the only ones standing.
The buzzer sounds and Calvin Lee is the next entrant.
After entering he immediately focuses his attention on the hurt McGurk, who is just now reaching his feet. He hits him with an overhead belly-to-belly suplex. This is fine enough for Thunder and Saku, who stand in an opposite corner and watch the beating. Lee waits for McGurk to reach his feet, at which point he climbs the top rope and hits a missile dropkick.
Lee has looked impressive so far, but he has neglected the other two men in the ring. Saku and Thunder sneak up on him and hit him with a double superplex on Lee. And once again, they high-five each other and celebrate by climbing the turnbuckles.
Matthew Werner: Their arrogance is ridiculous.
Matt Steel: I find nothing wrong with it.
For the first time in the match, their arrogance does not pay off. By the time they are done congratulating themselves, Lee has reached his feet and hits them with a double clothesline after they turn around. Still, Lee is a little worse for wear.
Matthew Werner: Looks like they shouldn’t have been so arrogant after all.
Matt Steel: Well you don’t have to get all snarky about it.
The buzzer sounds once again and this time it’s Reverend Shadow.
Matthew Werner: Looks like it’s time for one of the feuds in here to come to a head.
Matt Steel: I have no idea what you’re referring to.
Matthew Werner: Don’t you watch the shows when we announce it?
Matt Steel: I catch bits and pieces of it.
Shadow immediately goes after the man that attacked him and the only man standing at the moment, Lee. They exchange right hands before it changes to a long chop battle going back and forth until both men collapse to the mat. Lee reaches his feet first and lays in wait for Shadow to reach his feet. Once he does, Lee hits him with a jawbreaker and sends him into the ropes. He ducks his head for a backdrop, but Shadow kicks him in the head and sends him into the cage. He rakes his face across into until Lee is bleeding.
Matt Steel: There’s more blood here than when my sister had her first period.
Matthew Werner: Wow.
Matt Steel: Did I say that out loud?
The buzzer sounds and Yukio Blaze makes his way to the ring.
Matthew Werner: You know, these guys are coming it awfully fast.
Matt Steel: Yeah, it’s definitely less than two minutes.
Matthew Werner: Oh well.
While Shadow and Lee continue to fight in one corner, Blaze turns his attention to the two members of The Regime in the ring. First he heads towards Saku, who he sends into the steel before hitting a Pele kick. When that only staggers Saku, he hits him right in the jaw with a superkick.
By this point, Thunder is backing off from Blaze, but backs right into McGurk, who is back on his feet. The two men grab a hold of Thunder and give him a double back body drop before executing a spike piledriver of their own.
Matthew Werner: Looks like Wayne and Yukio will have no problems getting along.
Matt Steel: Give it time. The wheels will fall off soon.
Blaze waits for Thunder to reach his feet so he can hit him with a superkick. Just as he is about to do so, the lights go out.
Matthew Werner: The recession is hitting everybody hard, apparently.
When the lights come back on, nerO is standing behind Blaze with a chair in hand. He hits Blaze over the head and then does the same to McGurk. And although Lee and Shadow are aware of his presence, Saku and Thunder grab a hold of each of them so they can also be hit with the chair.
Once this is done, Thunder demands the door to the cage be opened and is given a microphone.
Thunder: Now I know the two minutes are not up yet, but seeing as we’ve laid out the competition and I know who’s next, bring out Trace Demon right now!
Trace Demon does indeed come down to the ring, at which point the four men raise their arms in victory. Still holding the microphone in hand, Thunder then knocks Blaze over the head with it several times before going back to his feet again.
Thunder: Ah, this is so much fun. But we need some guys asses’ to whip, so bring out number nine!
Instead of just one man coming out, both Alex Sean and DGX slowly and methodically make their way to the ring.
Thunder: What the hell is this? Both of you can’t come in now. Shut the door, dammit! Shut the door!
But since the referee is either deaf or mildly intellectually- disabled, he does nothing from stopping both Sean and DGX from entering the ring. At the same time, Lee is back on his feet and lays out Saku with the chair, leaving The Anointed and The Regime to engage in a three-on-three battle.
Matthew Werner: This should be interesting.
Matt Steel: One would hope.
Matthew Werner: Thanks, Debbie Downer.
The battle is even for a little bit, but soon enough that changes. Thunder puts Lee into the Million Dollar Dream, effectively eliminating him from the war for the time being, while Sean sends nerO face-first into the cage, knocking him out for the time being.
The buzzer sounds and seeing as we know EBR enters last, that means it’s going to be Kurt Burton. And it is.
The door opens but before Burton can get in the ring, Demon hits him with a plancha, sending both men crashing down onto the floor. Demon continues to attack Burton with a series of right hands, backing him further up the ramp. But when Burton starts to return the flurry of punches, Demon finds himself retreating by climbing up the outside of the cage.
Matthew Werner: This isn’t going to end well.
Matt Steel: Thanks for the brilliant observation, Hercule Poirot.
Matthew Werner: Who’s that?
Matt Steel: The detective from Agatha Christie’s books. You should read ‘em.
Matthew Werner: I’m more into—
Matt Steel: Romance novels.
Matthew Werner: I was actually going to say non-fiction.
Matt Steel: Oh.
Burton joins Demon at the roof of the cage (making it a cell, actually) where the two continue to exchange right hands. Demon ducks one and catches Burton with a DDT that although it does not break the roof, causes it to give quite a bit.
Matthew Werner: I’m not liking this at all, Matt. Do you know who easy it would be for that to break?
Matt Steel: And if it does, we’re looking at broken necks or worse.
Matthew Werner: What’s worse than a broken neck?
Matt Steel: A broken penis.
Matthew Werner: Wow.
Matt Steel: Did I say that out loud?
Demon drags Burton over to the other side of the cage, by the announce table. He then gets Burton in position for a powerbomb and yells for the announce table and anyone near it to clear away.
Matthew Werner: Don’t do it! He’s a human being!
Matt Steel: First off, he can’t hear you, and second off, I’m getting the hell away from this table.
Not satisfied with the quickness of the movements, Demon moves Burton aside and yells even louder. This gives Burton enough time to reach his feet and push Demon over the side and through the announce table.
Matthew Werner: Oh my God! He may be broken in half!
Matt Steel: We need some help out here. This is real bad.
Demon is lying motionless on top of what had, at another time, been an announce table while Burton smiles as he climbs down and enters the cage for the firs time.
Matthew Werner: For the love of God, get somebody out here. He may be an bunghole, but he’s still a human being. Who knows what kind of injuries he could have.
Finally, a team of paramedics wheel out a stretcher for Demon. Carefully, they place him on it and move him to the back.
The participants continue to fight as the buzzer sounds.
Matthew Werner: Well, we already know who the final participant is going to be.
Matt Steel: And via the process of elimination.
Matthew Werner: Don’t make me look like a fool, boy.
With the lights dimmed the familiar bells of “Going The Distance” by Bill Conti echo throughout the arena. Puff Daddy’s verse begins as the camera stays fixated on the stage, picking up the sounds, the boos and murmurs, which resonate from the crowd. It takes fifty seconds and a more aggressive beat before EBR finally appears, the distinctive voice of the Notorious BIG behind him.
Matthew Werner: EBR apparently a big fan of his own entrance.
EBR descends down the ramp, his sweat shirt hood over his head as his eyes stay focused on the ring. Loosening up he briefly jogs on the spot and cranks his neck, climbing the ring steps before entering the cage and through the second and third rope.
Matthew Werner: … Annnnnnnd we should finally be underway about now.
“Victory” begins to fade out as EBR removes his sweat shirt and the lighting resumes to normal. Every participant in the match is lying on the mat with the exception of Calvin Lee and the recently entered EBR. Calvin looks at EBR.[/color]
Calvin Lee: … Dude … that was my moment …
EBR shrugs.
Saku begins to rise to his feet, only for EBR to take him down with a hard forearm to the face. Reverend Shadow follows up, taken down by a Calvin Lee Drop-Kick. At this time DGX and Alex Sean rise to their feet, and as all four Anointed members nod at one another. Kurt Burton and Wayne McGurk ascend, only to be taken down with an Alex Sean Brainbuster and a DGX Running Enziguri, respectively.[/color]
Matt Steel: And the Anointed stand tall. Of course, they’re also the only men currently standing.
Matthew Werner: It’s a numbers game at this point. With Trace, nerO, and Yukio Blaze taken out the Anointed are the only team at full strength.
EBR, Calvin, Alex, and DGX take turns stomping on their downed opponents, until all four simultaneously stop and begin to chuckle.[/color]
Matthew Werner: This is looking like a match that’s all but over.
Matt Steel: That’s what happens when you have team unity, Matty.
Matthew Werner: And of course, the aforementioned numbers advantage.
Matt Steel: Well yeah, that was a given.
The Anointed begin to small talk in the middle of the ring.[/color]
EBR: Doing this Mike Tyson style, you know, before the Buster Douglas fight.
Calvin Lee: The Anointed rides again!
Alex Sean: Right.
EBR: … Anyone else kinda bored?
Alex Sean: Sorta. This is almost as boring as when my Ravens beat the Dolphins in the playoffs. Oh wait, isn’t that your team?
EBR: … The hell did you just say?
Alex Sean: It was a jo-
EBR: No one’s laughing. Calvin, are you laughing?
Calvin Lee: Not again …
EBR: D, you laughing?
DGX: Don’t care.
EBR: Right, so as I see it, we have one guy telling a joke that no one finds funny.
Alex Sean: I find it kind of funny.
EBR: Apologize.
Alex Sean: No.
EBR: Do it.
Alex Sean: No.
EBR: Well, at least I don’t have AIDs.
Alex Sean: The f*ck?
Calvin Lee: … You have AIDs?
Calvin inches away.[/color]
Alex Sean: Man, I don’t have AIDs.
EBR: What?
Alex Sean: Don’t have AIDs.
EBR: … So you lied to me?
At this moment, every opponent has made it to their feet and at the same time pounce on each Anointed member.[/color]
Matthew Werner: In a way, you could almost see that coming.
Saku and Thunder get DGX into the corner, stomping on him as Reverend Shadow Irish whips Calvin into the ropes and slams him into the canvas with a Spinebuster on the rebound. Meanwhile, Burton and McGurk pound on EBR and Alex Sean with right hands. With the Anointed downed, almost instinctively Burton turns his attention towards his former partner, and as Thunder turns his attention to the opposite side of the ring, he’s taken down by a Kurt Burton a Spear before Burton attacks him with more right hands.[/color]
Matthew Werner: This match has been turned up on it’s axis!
Matt Steel: How long did it take you to think of that?
Matthew Werner: Five minutes before the match. I wrote it down so I wouldn’t forget it. *point* See?
Reverend Shadow disposes of Saku by throwing him face first into the cage before he and McGurk simply stand guard, watching as Burton continues to mess with Thunder’s face. Before either can join in, Reverend is caught from behind with a kick to his testicles, courtesy of DGX. As Shadow’s shrill scream distracts McGurk, he turns towards this, only to be immediately hit with an Alex Sean Left Arm Lariat as EBR gets him from behind with a Chop Block![/color]
Matt Steel: Do you have any one liner for that?
Matthew Werner: Of course not, Matt. It only just happened. You know, you can be condescending at times. *rolls eyes*
Kurt Burton quickly gets off Thunder and stares at the Anointed, before he’s quickly handed a lead pipe through the holes in cage from Kat Hamilton.[/color]
Matt Steel: … Is that actually legal?
Matthew Werner: I don’t believe these matches actually have rules.
Matt Steel: So theoretically anyone could have ran out and entered the cage?
Matthew Werner: Well that’s yeah uh … a … kind of good point …
Matt Steel: Kurt Burton is running the sportsmanship of this two ringed, steel caged, supposed to be twelve man match!
EBR and Alex Sean stare at Burton as Kurt goes to town with the pipe, hitting Calvin, DGX, Saku, and the downed Thunder. As they watch this, both Alex Sean and EBR turn to other downed opponents as Burton nods and returns to Thunder.[/color]
Matthew Werner: That was formal.
Despite just being hit in the ribs with a pipe, Thunder’s able to desperately punch Burton in the balls.[/color]
Matthew Werner: That’s the second low blow we’ve seen in as a many minutes.
Reverend Shadow dives, head butting Alex’s groin.[/color]
Matt Steel: … Hrm.
As Burton staggers around the ring Thunder pulls himself up with the ring ropes before grabbing him from behind and slamming his spine into his knees with a Back-Cracker! He again gets to his feet, this time running at Calvin Lee and smacking him in the face with a Polish Hammer. Reverend Shadow is next, who on his knees from exhaustion, is hit in the face with a Shining Wizard.[/color]
Matt Steel: Thunder is cleaning house. This would have been a great time to make a Mexican maid joke, but alas, I’m not ignorant.
Smirking, Thunder gets back to his feet as he walks backwards, only to walk into Wayne McGurk. Startled, Thunder turns around and again walks backwards, this time into Kurt Burton.[/color]
Matthew Werner: Uh oh …
For the third time Thunder backs away, the angle leaving him face-to-faces with McGurk and Burton. Suddenly, he’s hit from behind with the George Atkinson Lariat![/color]
Matthew Werner: Never saw it coming!
With a personal history with all three of them, McGurk, Burton and EBR both begin to stomp on the Heavyweight Champion! All three pull him up and hit him with a barrage of forearms and other strikes, until EBR runs off the ring ropes and dives, hitting him with a Yakuza Kick to the head. Thunder falls into McGurk, who readjusts him before lifting him in a Cross Powerbomb. At this time, Burton catches him with a Neckbreaker on the way down![/color]
Matthew Werner: The Chopping Block!
Matt Steel: Thunder is learning fist hand why it really doesn’t help to make multiple enemies, especially when they happen to be in the same match as you.
As Burton gets up to his feet he smiles at McGurk, before he turns around and is immediately met with a hard and stiff shoulder to the jaw by a launching EBR![/color]
Matt Steel: Oh!
Seeing this, McGurk immediately charges at EBR, Big Booting him in the face and sending him into the corner. McGurk responds with several boxer like jabs before he turns EBR and chest first into the corner, hitting elbows to his kidneys. He pulls him out in a Back Drop and connects with the Blister City Slam![/color]
Matthew Werner: Wayne McGurk is absolutely taking it to EBR right now!
On the other side of the ring, a drowsy Reverend Shadow gets to his feet, only to be taken out and over the top rope with another Alex Sean Left Arm Lariat. The force of which takes Alex over the ropes as well. Back to EBR and McGurk, McGurk grabs EBR in a Reverse DDT and drops him onto his knee, before turning it into a modified Dragon Sleeper![/color]
Matthew Werner: The Razorback! Wayne McGurk has the Razorback applied!
On a nearby turnbuckle, Saku has Calvin positioned for a Reverse STO off the top rope, dubbed the Helsinki Driver. Before he can connect Calvin desperately and masterfully is able to push him off, sending him crashing chest first into the canvas! Meanwhile, McGurk proceeds to elbow EBR in the sternum in an effort to either knock him out or force a submission, whichever were to happen first.[/color]
Matthew Werner: I think this match may be nearing an end soon. I don’t know how much longer EBR can withstand this hold.
Just as Saku begins to stir to his feet, DGX takes him out with the Breakdown![/color]
Matt Steel: Oh! Again!
Matthew Werner: Where the hell did DGX come from?
Briefly looking over at the near comatose EBR, DGX pins Saku.[/color]
… 1[/color] …
Matt Steel: Could have it!
… 2[/color] …
Matt Steel: Will have it!
… 3[/color] …
Matt Steel: Does have it! Mah-Ah-Ah!
Ding! Ding! Ding![/color]
Matthew Werner: DGX wins the match and gets the title shot!
Literally a second after the match is won McGurk releases the hold and drops EBR, who at this point can be concluded as knocked out.[/color]
Matthew Werner: Wayne McGurk was just a second too late.
Matt Steel: Probably should have opted to break up the pin attempt.
Matthew Werner: Well that was kind of hard, Matt, on account of his back being towards it.
Matt Steel: Already with the excuses.
Matthew Werner: His back was to it! It was just an unlucky break.
McGurk briefly stands with his hands on his hips as “Imperium” by Machine Head plays. Shaking his head in a slight frustration McGurk turns his attention towards helping the slowly staggering Burton to his feet as the cage is opened and the triumphant DGX exits, arms in the air celebration as EBR is pulled out of the ring and out of the cage, carried by Alex Sean and Calvin Lee.[/color]
Matt Steel: The Anointed stand together triumphant!
Matthew Werner: For Matt Steel, I’m Matthew Werner, good night and we hope you enjoyed Battleground!
Matt Steel: DGX did.
The WFWF logo flashes across the screen, as the last shot of the show is shown before fading to black; DGX, gesturing for the Heavyweight Title by running his hands across his waist.[/color]
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