Post by Revvie® on Dec 30, 2013 7:39:32 GMT -5
“I still don’t know why he had to do that to ya head though,” the fattest of the three mice, Robbie, spoke with naïve navigation; a dullard.
Mike turned his headless bones towards his brother, “Really Robbie, I already told you I don’t know.”
The third mouse stood on hind legs, with mouth gaped. Gary wore a small pair of glasses, and would have been the thinnest. You know, if not to for the fact his cousin was a talking skeleton; with no head. This was probably the correct reaction, or one of many possible choices.
“I still don’t get it,” Robbie was still steeped in his own oblivion, but Mike noticed Cousin Gary finally blinked.
“You ok?” Mikes bones echoed the question, but Gary was left a little at a loss.
He stammered around in his head, but the doe eyed mannequin quickened back to reality. “I mean; clearly this; or maybe. Honestly I haven't the slightest intuition why you exist as you do now.”
“It's a fair question, but like Robbie; I am afraid I don’t have any damn idea.” Mike huffed, and staggered back and forth; back and forth. “The weird thing is, I have these dreams now.”
Gary interjected out of reflex, “You require sleep?”
“That is what I call it, but it isn’t the kind I remember. I just sort of forget myself; I guess would be the best description.”
“Ah, watchu dreamin about?” Robbie scuttled up to his fallen brother, and sniffed fervently.
Mike knocked him backwards, but his sibling didn’t seem to mind. Robbie just zoned into the top of the cage; smiling. With a roll of his eyes, the skeleton mouse ‘glared’ back at Gary. “Anyways, my dreams are about the kid who killed me.”
“That is interesting,” Gary shook, but was settling into the new arrangement.
“The interesting thing is, it is like this on going story. It doesn’t stop, it just all this bullcrap. Like a tv show, that I can’t escape. Like for instance, the last dream I had…..”
Part 1(of2)
By, Revvie
*PAST*
The floor was white.
The walls were white.
The pen, the Doctor clicked incessantly, was white.
Jason curled up against the wall; head dangled between his fetaled legs. This was what he found at the end of the black out. His new home; his new hell. The endless array of people spoke with disgust, concern, and confusion about his acts.
Years had passed, and he felt nothing towards the situation; still couldn’t remember. The only thing he felt was irritation; for the doctor, and every click of that damn pen. “They tell me that you claim to still not remember incident?”
The Doctor paused, but no response emerged.
“Alright, well let’s move on then,” The white coat scuffled, and the paper ruffled. Jason listened and imagined rain pattering in puddles. His mind caressed the image, but the noise of the doctor’s voice killed his reverie, “Aha, here it is, this paper states that you may be a danger to others. Do you feel you are a danger?”
Jason finally muttered, “Don’t know; don’t care.”
A guffaw came before the Doc spoke, “Though it comes with a bit of sarcasm, I don’t feel like you are a danger; at least not to anyone else. So, after I leave, you will be released to the recreation area. If anything, it would be a nice breather for you. Being in one room for such a duration would drive anybody insane.”
The doctor got a good laugh from the misplaced humor, but Jason didn’t care. Though; time to stretch his legs, and have some noise other than his thoughts, would be nice. He couldn’t deny himself the pleasure, but Jason was still too frustrated to play their games.
---------------
Mental hospitals were never as he imagined; no dribbling fools, no absent-minded child-like teens, but still some appeared as outliers. One boy patted at his arm, while talking to someone who couldn’t be seen. A girl growled as he walked by her; baring her canines. He worried, when she first bit at him, but as long as you kept out of her territory she paid you little mind.
Jadoa took the path of least resistance, and maneuvered round the game tables and lounging chairs. His socks drug across, and each step became a composition. It was one of solemn relief, because at the very best he was worlds above these crazies, and at worst; Well, he was still miles from such a mentality. It was naïve, but he needed to think in those terms.
The Doctor opened his world again, but Jason never left the shell. Then came a tap at his shoulder. Jadoa turned to find a younger boy gazing at the ground; stick in hand. “I-I-I saw you.”
Jason’s face contorted, and his muscles contracted; annoyance and inconvenience.
“I-I-I saw you…”
“Yes, yes I know, what is your point?”
“I-I s-s-saw you in-in my dream,” The boy wore a pair of thick glasses, red hair that was a wild mess, and Jadoa quietly wondered if he was a biter as well.
However, he didn’t bother to voice concern; only irritation. “I don’t have time for nonsense,” and Jason turned away.
The kid interrupted Jadoa again, but this time the jammed stick in Jason's back. Jadoa turned on the child, and eyes sat on his prey. This was quickly deflected by the next statement, “I kn-know that y-y-you t-think me a stupid, but I-I am far from it.”
“Your name?”
“Jedidiah, or-W-What-Whatley; some ca-ca-call me Whaty.”
Jason eased his presentation. He didn’t like Whaty, but felt compelled to give him the conversation. Jason commanded with simple syllables, “Continue.”
“R-r-right, I saw y-you in my-my dream last n-n-nigh-t.”
“You must have been mistaken, as I don’t know you, and quiver to think of what pervy
ing dreams console you.”
The red hair child insisted further, “No-no, it-t isn’t l-like that. I know y-you Jason, and I-I-I know about T-Tommy.”
Jason eyes glazed, and a glare took him by surprise In that moment he could see Tommy again, and the tears that flushed out his love. Tommy’s head lay at Jason’s feet where a he felt the lump, but dared not look.
But the lump rolled up to his eyes, and they reeled back to white fire. Jadoa approached Whaty, with possessed movements. He couldn’t rationalize, couldn’t reason, and could define reality; something snapped.
That snap was a slap to this cheek, and it reddened the boy back to the real world. A girl of equal size and stature to him stood with venom. “What in the do you think you are doing, he is a ing kid you bunghole!
“To top it the off; do you want to be locked up in your ing room your entire life; because losing your crap like that will get you there.”
Jason couldn’t remember. A pattern he was beginning to hate, if only because it always ended badly.
“Get out of here Jed, I will deal with this.” Whaty didn’t wait to see what transpired, he was only glad he didn’t suffer a similar fate as Tommy, or his pet mouse.
“I didn’t mean too,” Jason stuttered for explanation, but was cut off.
“Save iter; Jed is a friend of mine, and if I catch you going all crazy and crap or whatever the was going on with you; I will put your ass down. Do you ing hear me?”
Whoever she was, he was partly enamored, and mostly confused. She spewed profanity like an expert, and her gait was of no great stature. That didn’t change the sting that he suffered. “I don’t know what happened…I am sorry.”
Jadoa swiveled round and slumped back towards the other side of the room. He found an empty lounge chair and dropped hard. His body hurt, and his mind fogged. Then he was interrupted once again; The chair next to him squealed, but he didn’t care enough to peek.
“So you say you can’t remember eh?”
Eyelids parted and Jason spotted the girl who had greeted him with slap to the cheek, “What the hell do you want now. You having dreams about me too?”
“Huh?”
“Nothing, just, yea I don’t remember. Sorry. I already apologized, so go away.”
She giggled, “My name is Kara.”
“What is funny?”
“You’re neurotic, aren’t you?”
Jason gawked at her, and couldn't gather the sense to speak. Kara, however, just smiled.
“Anyways…You know if you put that energy to good use, it will help. Ya know, focus it.”
Jason scoffed, “And why should I trust your opinion, or care?”
Kara didn’t break her bright stride, and left him wondering if the girl who threatened him had been her twin. Her voice still perked, “I guess ya don’t have to, but I might suggest that this place can be awful lonely with no one to talk to. From what I've heard, you don’t get much time out of your cage. I mean if you want to be an animal; have at it.”
“And what do you suggest would focus me?”
“I don’t know for sure, but you definitely got some anger issues. Or, whatever the hell that was that happened back there with Jed.” Kara talked truth, but Jadoa was having trouble translating. Everyone kept talking about all these things he was. The doctors, and now the patients, knew what was best, but they never bothered to ask HIS opinion.
“ you,” his words were heat.
Kara just glared at him, and Jason felt cold beneath it. She saw something, and he didn’t like how it felt on his skin.
“Look at me however the you want, you’re still a bitch for saying that crap. You don’t know all about my life, and even if you did. By some great feat you mastered the task; I still wouldn’t give two goddamn craps.”
Jason’s profanity infused rant caused her to grin again, and now the only thing he could find in the way of feeling; a smidge of a self-doubt. Kara had reduced him to a joke, and he wasn’t amused.
“Why is this soing funny; seriously, you are ing crazy aren’t you?”
Kara laughed, “As are you.”
Jason just didn’t see what she could be thinking, but as her eyes softened it became clear. It wasn’t a laugh at him, so much as in awe of him. She liked him? No, that couldn’t be it; Jason put it from his head.
“Come on, can’t we just get along; talk a little? I mean really, what do you have to lose?”
“My sanity?”
Kara smirked with snide, “Irony.”
Jadoa then gave his own grin in return.
“Awesome, we see eye to eye then. Come come,” Kara gripped his arm and drug him along. This caused Jason to wonder whether they were all areas legal to the patients. Though the nurse key she stole should have tipped him.
Many halls passed, and doors opened; they weaved through time and space. Maybe that was a little strong, but Jadoa felt like they were, and would have been lost there forever if he had his way.
The two reached a door that clearly should have been shut by the size of it, but it was wide open. “My slice of heaven.”
Jadoa looked on awkwardly, “Where are we?”
“Suicide wing,” Kara seemed careless with the words, or as far as Jason concerned himself, “Keep’em locked up here to stay safe, and honestly they are the most comfortable rooms in the place.”
“Why are we here?”
She look dumbfounded, “I said it had the most comfortable rooms, that and the company you find here is fantastic; mostly because they are all really lonely. But you know, beggars, choosers, and what not.
“Actually, I have someone I want you to meet.” Before Jason could protest, the door came open. Kara jerked him into the room where a boy sat with his legs crossed; meditating. “This is Master David.”
Jason’s face gave way to doubt about the character that sat on the floor, and it didn’t help they were in the suicide area. Scraggily brown dreads hung from all sides, and deep stillness held him in place.
“David!” Kara boomed, breaking his concentration, and sending him back on his ass.
The meditating teen fell backwards, “What the, you know better than that Kara! Let me down easy; down just drop that voice in like a bomb, man.”
Kara gave in to her usual giggle, but Jason still felt off about this guy. He couldn’t tell if he was just defensive, or this pseudo saint was a charlatan leading a charge. Either way, he was a skeptic, “Kara called you Master, but master of what exactly?”
“Master of Nothingness.”
“Sounds like bullcrap,” Jason’s words pierced Kara’s hear, and color drained from her face. David didn’t surprise easy, and he just smiled; nodded.
“It might be bullcrap, but then again I don’t think anyone in this building reeks of much else.” David spoke with a precision Jason never once encountered before, or again in another soul. He could calm the waves of the universe, and distill an incoming hurricane. “Leave us and lock us away for a time Kara, I think it may be wise to take our dear friend straight to the belly of the beast.”
She didn’t give an emotion, but only nodded. She wandered out of the tiny room and door sealed with the sound of suction. Jadoa attempted and air of surety, but the sweat on his forehead betrayed him.
“Why don’t you sit with me, talk, and see if we cannot find you?” Master David still spoke with un-welcomed authority, but Jason didn’t force the issue. Might as well try to understand the reason.
“Find me?”
“Ah yes, find you, why else would we search the nothingness, but to absolve it of our presence?” David spoke in riddles, and Jadoa only wanted the point.
Jason struck with blunt direction, “Are you thising crazy; really?”
The Master said nothing, but his pupils did widen with intent, “Speak to me how you wish, but questions of that nature will be put down with force if they continue.” David’s words swarmed Jason’s nervous system, and his every ending stood with fervor; he was afraid.
-----------------------------
*PRESENT*
Trist’s breath broke the Reverend's meditation, “So I am glad that rat is finally gone; looked at me funny.”
Shadow peeked from beneath nothingness, and saw Trist watching. He didn’t like being disturbed during his meditations, and liked it even less when it was his dumbass roommate. “It was necessary, and is not now.”
“Yea yea, whatever, the only thing I care about is that the vermin doesn’ting take up space,”
“And yet, some vermin still do.”
Trist’s frustration glowed, but he tried to laugh off the attack. “ off, least I didn’t go around at some young ing age banging chicks, and then leaving kids behind; did I?”
That did it, the Reverend came to his feet and pressed Trist against the wall with his forearm lodged in the annoying crap’s mouth, “Listen up, I tolerate your mouth out of some sort of pity; don’t press past that sensibility with me.”
“ man, whatever, I am just saying that it is a little ing weird that you would just suddenly have a damn daughter!”
Shadow dropped Trist to the floor, “What do you mean?”
“I’m justing saying dude, it could be bullcrap; ya know lying to ya and crap. What, you couldn’t ing see that possibility. Ha, I thought you were the brainy one.”
Thoughts rolled in, and out, and the simple nature of Trist’s inquiry remained sturdy. Reverend couldn’t see motive though, or what was to gain; but maybe it was a means to an end game. A motive beyond trivial humanity.
His thoughts were complex, but Trist’s words were not. “Yea, I didn’ting think so. You would skip over that.”
“What about my dreams?”
“Hey man,” Trist snickered, “I have fantasy’s about Penny; doesn’t mean she is suddenly straight, and we areing.”
Reverend didn’t pay mine to the crude narrative, but Trist had a point. Is it possible he just saw what he wanted? He did ask her, and she had only confirmed it. Could it have been just a play, a game? No, no the feeling was too strong; a bond that has to within their genetics. Shadow could feel the truth, but it still dwelled in murky waters.
“Hey are you going to think about it all damn day, or are you going to do the right thing and figure out what her ass is up to?” As the latter half of his sentence left his mouth, Lauren came through the door.
“Good morning, good morning. I see you are deep in thought today, care for some brain food.” Lauren carried in a dozen Krispy Kreme donuts and Shadow couldn’t help but cave to the treat. He walked over and snatched up them out of her hands, and gestured for her to take a seat at the table. “So I see you have been meditating this morning as well, is there something bothering you…Dad.”
The word drew him in, but Rev. internally cringed as it pounded through. Lauren’s voice was sincere, but his doubt still dwelled. “Just trying to remember things, and sometimes it helps.”
“Well, ya know, you have been avoiding the question you asked me? I am just wondering what role it plays in this?”
“Drop it.”
Lauren obliged, “Well then, have you given any thought about the McGurk situation, wanna talk about that?”
“No.”
“Fine, well what about you kidnapping a rat?”
“No.”
Lauren finally took a command, “Well then, how about your match.”
Shadow knew he had to divulge something, and she pressed hard with her presence. Truth was, he hadn’t given much thought to the match.
“I am waiting…”
“I hadn’t, but it may do some good.” He tried to sound sincere, but his tone deceived on himself. Rev. knew he couldn’t hide behind the mask around her.
Trist didn’t wait to interject, “Yea, cause you know, arrogance gets your ass nothing.”
Shadow didn’t ling on his words, and instead drifted with his daughters. Lauren ran through him, “Well, I know that you should be aware of this guy’s mental stability.”
Rev. cocked his head; perplexed, “Why do you say that.”
“Well, I can’t be sure, and I mean I am still early on in my studies,” then the uncertainty shifted to expertise, “But from what I have heard about him from the other wrestlers, and other means, well he has either tried to commit suicide, or is suicidal. Take that into account with some other rumors. Basically; it is a cause for concern.”
Suicide was an area that frolicked in his past, but nothing so recent. The Nothingness, the need to focus, and a host of other ideas shrilled through his veins, “What do you think of my mental state?”
Lauren took on a crunch of a confusion, “Why do you ask? And are we going to have another episode like last time?”
“No no, I have found my focus now; I promise you this.”
“Sure his ass has, and I am faire from the land of the fae people,” Trist kept poking but his stick came too short, and made not dent in either Rev. or Lauren.
She then gave in to his will, “I think you are of sound mind, but not so much of heart. After the attack on your best friend, from which you still have no viable answer to give me, I can only assume your reasoning is a heavy one.”
“Already said I didn’t wannaing talk about that…”
Lauren shut him down, “Yes, and you also wanted my thoughts. I mean, I have no idea what game you are playing here, but you are going to lose if you don’t get your head out of whatever the hell is going on. You don’t have time for it.”
She was right though, and Shadow felt it course through him. The vigor took him by surprise, but in his mind everything was clear. He could see his pieces before him, the moves he had made, and those he would make. Lauren, McGurk, Crow, Penny, Scarlett…Scarlett.
“Hey, are you alright?” Lauren got a good look, and concern took, “Hey, Jason, are you in there…Dad?”
Rev. snapped back, “I have something I have to attend to.”
“Right now?”
“Yes,” Shadow started to gather up his jacket, and a few items.
“So that it is, we aren’t going to talk about your match, your mood, or this?”
He gazed back before exiting, and smiled. “You are correct.”
“Goddamnit!” Lauren shouted, but Rev was gone. She knew that this situation could end badly for her, and had already dodged several phone calls today from her boss. If Shadow didn’t get done what they needed, it was her ass.
The phone vibrated.
“Of course he woulding call when a thought of him.”
---------------------
Scarlett didn't catch the name of the bar when she walked in, nor did she happen to catch the name of the town or city she was in. She frankly just didn't care, as far as the girl was concerned, if life was going to shut her off and beat her, then it was just no use fighting and Scarlett felt compelled to allow the world to guide her towards her next-up.
Scarlett had herself several beers over the course of that morning and if she wasn't careful, it wasn't long before she'd be out of cigs.
" it,” Scarlett hissed, chugging her head, "Just everything."
The bar door was taken for a swing, as soon as she spoke those words. Scarlett didn't bother to watch the incoming patron, but it wasn’t an ordinary occurrence. The good Reverend crept in slow and made his way over to the bar; spotting Scarlett. He had looked for her since the Scars and Stripes.
Revelation compelled him down into a stool, but she didn't even look up. "Excuse me miss, think it may be a little early for a drink?"
Scarlett turned to the patron and scoffed, "You're one to talk."
Scarlett sipped her beer and took a deep breath as she turned away from the patron and just reeled in the nice, warm, glaze that came from the alcohol as it started to take its toll on her.
For now, the world was a lot more tolerable.
"Besides, a question like that is strictly societal. We're wrestlers, as long as we're out of the ring, 'real' time doesn't quite apply to people like us."
"Apply or not, it seems as though time is taking quite the toll on you, and I do mean in 'real time.' The bar tender made way but Shadow cut him off before he could inquire.
"Just a water for me please," and then Rev turned his intent back on Scarlett, "So I have heard that Penny played a role in your downfall." His words were genuine, but his eyes spit venom.
The sound of Penny's name hit Scarlett's last nerve; a stabbing irritant that hurt more than Scarlett would have liked. She clenched her fist and took another deep breath as she sipped her beer.
"Should have seen that one coming, eh? It's my fault- I was too trusting."
"I suppose; but then no matter how vetted the wrestler, surprises exist."
"Like what you did to my dad during the show?" Scarlett rolled her eyes and scoffed. "Scars and Stripes was not a good night for my family."
Rev laughed, "Maybe not, but seeds of change start small. Sometimes we have to look at a turn of events not for what it is, but its probability of becoming.
Sometimes we even have to plant it ourselves."
"What does that mean?"
"Whatever you need it to mean?"
Shadow's words were pleasant, but he didn’t rely on it.
"Take for instance you in this bar right now. How exactly do you see this impacting your life, where is it you are going now?
"Nowhere, that's where!” Scarlett snapped, lighting up one of her last cigarettes now. "I swear to God, I don't know how you've actually managed to make it through your terrible existence and now, you come in on your high horse and try to teach a lesson I'm probably not going to get"
Scarlett sighed and took a nice, long drag.
"I don't get it. All anyone ever seems to want to do is other people over. And for what? You and my dad looked like you were going fine, maybe you two were a little pissy at each other, but you both seemed fine. I mean, what is it? You were too much of a **** to beat my dad the first time around that the only time you can get it done is now, when he's been retired for over a decade? If it isn't a match, its gold, if it isn't that is just some stupid idea of glory that no one, under these circumstances can ever reach... God."
Shadow smiled at Scarlett. He then stood and leaned into her ear; hand pressed on her shoulder, "One cannot see a human being, while standing at the edge of the universe, but life has purpose regardless.
I wouldn't dwell on where I stand too much, but would be wise to give more attention to one’s own placement; terrible as it all may be, but still is consumed with purpose."
Reverend then leaned out and walked out of the bar; leaving Scarlett to her thoughts and her beer.
---------------------------
“Mr. Slinn inquires as to why we have stopped treatment? He also had a few other concerns, one of which was your ability to take care of the patient.” The man wore a slick suit, and no discernible hair on his entire body.
Laura wasn’t fazed, “Tell you what; you tell Mr. Slinn to concern himself with projects that actually need help. I am fine.”
Her hiss did nothing to fade the man’s monotone, “He also feels that the incident involving the acid, was too convenient, given your earlier requests.”
“Are you accusing me something?” Laura’s eyes went dead and, like her dads, they looked right through whoever they found.
He kept this cool, “I accuse you of nothing, but your practices have brought many doubts down the chain of command; I am merely the messenger.”
“Is there something else I should know, or can we be done with this?”
“Actually,” he cleared his throat, “There is a matter of information he is seeking from you, and of that which you are giving.”
“Speak clearly, or move the on; I don’t have time for this. Jason has a match he needs to win.” Lauren attempted to quicken the conversation.
“You spoke of the truth of familial bond; that was an extreme that could result poorly in the results. Mr. Slinn believes this was unnecessary burden. Also, your obsession with his in ring situation has his troubled. It is not professional, and expresses possible alternative motives.”
“Ya know what, you tell Mr. Slinn he can carry his fat ass from his millions of dollars, and come talk to me hising self,” Lauren’s tone was tough, “And you can fall off the face of the planet, and if I have to see you again without Mr. Slinn, you’re gonna find out just how much of my dad I have in me.”
-----------------------------------
*Past*
Master David looked at Jason with a bit of confusion, “Are you well.”
Jadoa’s eyes deepened, and his face sunk into the bones. David had never had a pupil like Jason, and it scared him at how well he took to the Nothing. Something was right, but he knew that it was already in motion; he couldn’t stop what was never his to control.
“If you are well, then knock twice-pause-knock another 3 times. Kara will let you out, and I would suggest much rest over the never few days. Come back if you need further guidance.” David’s voice shook with uncertainty, but Jason only nodded in approval of the terms.
Jason knocked the proper way, and Kara released the door to the shell of boy she had brought to her special place. His pale face, and black eyes stood glaring into everything; piercing reality.
She led him through the corridors again, but there was no rush. Jason drug along, and Kara couldn’t help but feel responsible for his state. “What happened in there?”
“I was shown what I needed to do to be at peace.”
“Okay?” Skepticism laced her word, “And that is?”
“David was speaking the truth, you just have to let yourself go to the nothing. Everything will make sense then.”
Now Kara was concerned. No one had come out of David’s chamber like that. I mean some weren’t right in the head to begin with, but this was different; too different, but she couldn’t find the reason, or what it meant.
“Tomorrow, you will understand,” was the last thing he said to Kara that night.
Jason returned to his room, and shut the door behind; sealing him in. He sat down from his bed a slipped a small piece of jagged metal from under his sleeve.
“Just have to focus.”
…..To be continued.
Mike turned his headless bones towards his brother, “Really Robbie, I already told you I don’t know.”
The third mouse stood on hind legs, with mouth gaped. Gary wore a small pair of glasses, and would have been the thinnest. You know, if not to for the fact his cousin was a talking skeleton; with no head. This was probably the correct reaction, or one of many possible choices.
“I still don’t get it,” Robbie was still steeped in his own oblivion, but Mike noticed Cousin Gary finally blinked.
“You ok?” Mikes bones echoed the question, but Gary was left a little at a loss.
He stammered around in his head, but the doe eyed mannequin quickened back to reality. “I mean; clearly this; or maybe. Honestly I haven't the slightest intuition why you exist as you do now.”
“It's a fair question, but like Robbie; I am afraid I don’t have any damn idea.” Mike huffed, and staggered back and forth; back and forth. “The weird thing is, I have these dreams now.”
Gary interjected out of reflex, “You require sleep?”
“That is what I call it, but it isn’t the kind I remember. I just sort of forget myself; I guess would be the best description.”
“Ah, watchu dreamin about?” Robbie scuttled up to his fallen brother, and sniffed fervently.
Mike knocked him backwards, but his sibling didn’t seem to mind. Robbie just zoned into the top of the cage; smiling. With a roll of his eyes, the skeleton mouse ‘glared’ back at Gary. “Anyways, my dreams are about the kid who killed me.”
“That is interesting,” Gary shook, but was settling into the new arrangement.
“The interesting thing is, it is like this on going story. It doesn’t stop, it just all this bullcrap. Like a tv show, that I can’t escape. Like for instance, the last dream I had…..”
Part 1(of2)
By, Revvie
*PAST*
The floor was white.
The walls were white.
The pen, the Doctor clicked incessantly, was white.
Jason curled up against the wall; head dangled between his fetaled legs. This was what he found at the end of the black out. His new home; his new hell. The endless array of people spoke with disgust, concern, and confusion about his acts.
Years had passed, and he felt nothing towards the situation; still couldn’t remember. The only thing he felt was irritation; for the doctor, and every click of that damn pen. “They tell me that you claim to still not remember incident?”
The Doctor paused, but no response emerged.
“Alright, well let’s move on then,” The white coat scuffled, and the paper ruffled. Jason listened and imagined rain pattering in puddles. His mind caressed the image, but the noise of the doctor’s voice killed his reverie, “Aha, here it is, this paper states that you may be a danger to others. Do you feel you are a danger?”
Jason finally muttered, “Don’t know; don’t care.”
A guffaw came before the Doc spoke, “Though it comes with a bit of sarcasm, I don’t feel like you are a danger; at least not to anyone else. So, after I leave, you will be released to the recreation area. If anything, it would be a nice breather for you. Being in one room for such a duration would drive anybody insane.”
The doctor got a good laugh from the misplaced humor, but Jason didn’t care. Though; time to stretch his legs, and have some noise other than his thoughts, would be nice. He couldn’t deny himself the pleasure, but Jason was still too frustrated to play their games.
---------------
Mental hospitals were never as he imagined; no dribbling fools, no absent-minded child-like teens, but still some appeared as outliers. One boy patted at his arm, while talking to someone who couldn’t be seen. A girl growled as he walked by her; baring her canines. He worried, when she first bit at him, but as long as you kept out of her territory she paid you little mind.
Jadoa took the path of least resistance, and maneuvered round the game tables and lounging chairs. His socks drug across, and each step became a composition. It was one of solemn relief, because at the very best he was worlds above these crazies, and at worst; Well, he was still miles from such a mentality. It was naïve, but he needed to think in those terms.
The Doctor opened his world again, but Jason never left the shell. Then came a tap at his shoulder. Jadoa turned to find a younger boy gazing at the ground; stick in hand. “I-I-I saw you.”
Jason’s face contorted, and his muscles contracted; annoyance and inconvenience.
“I-I-I saw you…”
“Yes, yes I know, what is your point?”
“I-I s-s-saw you in-in my dream,” The boy wore a pair of thick glasses, red hair that was a wild mess, and Jadoa quietly wondered if he was a biter as well.
However, he didn’t bother to voice concern; only irritation. “I don’t have time for nonsense,” and Jason turned away.
The kid interrupted Jadoa again, but this time the jammed stick in Jason's back. Jadoa turned on the child, and eyes sat on his prey. This was quickly deflected by the next statement, “I kn-know that y-y-you t-think me a stupid, but I-I am far from it.”
“Your name?”
“Jedidiah, or-W-What-Whatley; some ca-ca-call me Whaty.”
Jason eased his presentation. He didn’t like Whaty, but felt compelled to give him the conversation. Jason commanded with simple syllables, “Continue.”
“R-r-right, I saw y-you in my-my dream last n-n-nigh-t.”
“You must have been mistaken, as I don’t know you, and quiver to think of what pervy
ing dreams console you.”The red hair child insisted further, “No-no, it-t isn’t l-like that. I know y-you Jason, and I-I-I know about T-Tommy.”
Jason eyes glazed, and a glare took him by surprise In that moment he could see Tommy again, and the tears that flushed out his love. Tommy’s head lay at Jason’s feet where a he felt the lump, but dared not look.
But the lump rolled up to his eyes, and they reeled back to white fire. Jadoa approached Whaty, with possessed movements. He couldn’t rationalize, couldn’t reason, and could define reality; something snapped.
That snap was a slap to this cheek, and it reddened the boy back to the real world. A girl of equal size and stature to him stood with venom. “What in the
do you think you are doing, he is a ing kid you bunghole!“To top it the
off; do you want to be locked up in your ing room your entire life; because losing your crap like that will get you there.”Jason couldn’t remember. A pattern he was beginning to hate, if only because it always ended badly.
“Get out of here Jed, I will deal with this.” Whaty didn’t wait to see what transpired, he was only glad he didn’t suffer a similar fate as Tommy, or his pet mouse.
“I didn’t mean too,” Jason stuttered for explanation, but was cut off.
“Save it
er; Jed is a friend of mine, and if I catch you going all crazy and crap or whatever the was going on with you; I will put your ass down. Do you ing hear me?”Whoever she was, he was partly enamored, and mostly confused. She spewed profanity like an expert, and her gait was of no great stature. That didn’t change the sting that he suffered. “I don’t know what happened…I am sorry.”
Jadoa swiveled round and slumped back towards the other side of the room. He found an empty lounge chair and dropped hard. His body hurt, and his mind fogged. Then he was interrupted once again; The chair next to him squealed, but he didn’t care enough to peek.
“So you say you can’t remember eh?”
Eyelids parted and Jason spotted the girl who had greeted him with slap to the cheek, “What the hell do you want now. You having dreams about me too?”
“Huh?”
“Nothing, just, yea I don’t remember. Sorry. I already apologized, so go away.”
She giggled, “My name is Kara.”
“What is funny?”
“You’re neurotic, aren’t you?”
Jason gawked at her, and couldn't gather the sense to speak. Kara, however, just smiled.
“Anyways…You know if you put that energy to good use, it will help. Ya know, focus it.”
Jason scoffed, “And why should I trust your opinion, or care?”
Kara didn’t break her bright stride, and left him wondering if the girl who threatened him had been her twin. Her voice still perked, “I guess ya don’t have to, but I might suggest that this place can be awful lonely with no one to talk to. From what I've heard, you don’t get much time out of your cage. I mean if you want to be an animal; have at it.”
“And what do you suggest would focus me?”
“I don’t know for sure, but you definitely got some anger issues. Or, whatever the hell that was that happened back there with Jed.” Kara talked truth, but Jadoa was having trouble translating. Everyone kept talking about all these things he was. The doctors, and now the patients, knew what was best, but they never bothered to ask HIS opinion.
“
you,” his words were heat.Kara just glared at him, and Jason felt cold beneath it. She saw something, and he didn’t like how it felt on his skin.
“Look at me however the
you want, you’re still a bitch for saying that crap. You don’t know all about my life, and even if you did. By some great feat you mastered the task; I still wouldn’t give two goddamn craps.”Jason’s profanity infused rant caused her to grin again, and now the only thing he could find in the way of feeling; a smidge of a self-doubt. Kara had reduced him to a joke, and he wasn’t amused.
“Why is this so
ing funny; seriously, you are ing crazy aren’t you?”Kara laughed, “As are you.”
Jason just didn’t see what she could be thinking, but as her eyes softened it became clear. It wasn’t a laugh at him, so much as in awe of him. She liked him? No, that couldn’t be it; Jason put it from his head.
“Come on, can’t we just get along; talk a little? I mean really, what do you have to lose?”
“My sanity?”
Kara smirked with snide, “Irony.”
Jadoa then gave his own grin in return.
“Awesome, we see eye to eye then. Come come,” Kara gripped his arm and drug him along. This caused Jason to wonder whether they were all areas legal to the patients. Though the nurse key she stole should have tipped him.
Many halls passed, and doors opened; they weaved through time and space. Maybe that was a little strong, but Jadoa felt like they were, and would have been lost there forever if he had his way.
The two reached a door that clearly should have been shut by the size of it, but it was wide open. “My slice of heaven.”
Jadoa looked on awkwardly, “Where are we?”
“Suicide wing,” Kara seemed careless with the words, or as far as Jason concerned himself, “Keep’em locked up here to stay safe, and honestly they are the most comfortable rooms in the place.”
“Why are we here?”
She look dumbfounded, “I said it had the most comfortable rooms, that and the company you find here is fantastic; mostly because they are all really lonely. But you know, beggars, choosers, and what not.
“Actually, I have someone I want you to meet.” Before Jason could protest, the door came open. Kara jerked him into the room where a boy sat with his legs crossed; meditating. “This is Master David.”
Jason’s face gave way to doubt about the character that sat on the floor, and it didn’t help they were in the suicide area. Scraggily brown dreads hung from all sides, and deep stillness held him in place.
“David!” Kara boomed, breaking his concentration, and sending him back on his ass.
The meditating teen fell backwards, “What the
, you know better than that Kara! Let me down easy; down just drop that voice in like a bomb, man.”Kara gave in to her usual giggle, but Jason still felt off about this guy. He couldn’t tell if he was just defensive, or this pseudo saint was a charlatan leading a charge. Either way, he was a skeptic, “Kara called you Master, but master of what exactly?”
“Master of Nothingness.”
“Sounds like bullcrap,” Jason’s words pierced Kara’s hear, and color drained from her face. David didn’t surprise easy, and he just smiled; nodded.
“It might be bullcrap, but then again I don’t think anyone in this building reeks of much else.” David spoke with a precision Jason never once encountered before, or again in another soul. He could calm the waves of the universe, and distill an incoming hurricane. “Leave us and lock us away for a time Kara, I think it may be wise to take our dear friend straight to the belly of the beast.”
She didn’t give an emotion, but only nodded. She wandered out of the tiny room and door sealed with the sound of suction. Jadoa attempted and air of surety, but the sweat on his forehead betrayed him.
“Why don’t you sit with me, talk, and see if we cannot find you?” Master David still spoke with un-welcomed authority, but Jason didn’t force the issue. Might as well try to understand the reason.
“Find me?”
“Ah yes, find you, why else would we search the nothingness, but to absolve it of our presence?” David spoke in riddles, and Jadoa only wanted the point.
Jason struck with blunt direction, “Are you this
ing crazy; really?”The Master said nothing, but his pupils did widen with intent, “Speak to me how you wish, but questions of that nature will be put down with force if they continue.” David’s words swarmed Jason’s nervous system, and his every ending stood with fervor; he was afraid.
-----------------------------
*PRESENT*
Trist’s breath broke the Reverend's meditation, “So I am glad that rat is finally gone; looked at me funny.”
Shadow peeked from beneath nothingness, and saw Trist watching. He didn’t like being disturbed during his meditations, and liked it even less when it was his dumbass roommate. “It was necessary, and is not now.”
“Yea yea, whatever, the only thing I care about is that the vermin doesn’t
ing take up space,”“And yet, some vermin still do.”
Trist’s frustration glowed, but he tried to laugh off the attack. “
off, least I didn’t go around at some young ing age banging chicks, and then leaving kids behind; did I?”That did it, the Reverend came to his feet and pressed Trist against the wall with his forearm lodged in the annoying crap’s mouth, “Listen up, I tolerate your mouth out of some sort of pity; don’t press past that sensibility with me.”
“
man, whatever, I am just saying that it is a little ing weird that you would just suddenly have a damn daughter!” Shadow dropped Trist to the floor, “What do you mean?”
“I’m just
ing saying dude, it could be bullcrap; ya know lying to ya and crap. What, you couldn’t ing see that possibility. Ha, I thought you were the brainy one.”Thoughts rolled in, and out, and the simple nature of Trist’s inquiry remained sturdy. Reverend couldn’t see motive though, or what was to gain; but maybe it was a means to an end game. A motive beyond trivial humanity.
His thoughts were complex, but Trist’s words were not. “Yea, I didn’t
ing think so. You would skip over that.”“What about my dreams?”
“Hey man,” Trist snickered, “I have fantasy’s about Penny; doesn’t mean she is suddenly straight, and we are
ing.”Reverend didn’t pay mine to the crude narrative, but Trist had a point. Is it possible he just saw what he wanted? He did ask her, and she had only confirmed it. Could it have been just a play, a game? No, no the feeling was too strong; a bond that has to within their genetics. Shadow could feel the truth, but it still dwelled in murky waters.
“Hey are you going to think about it all damn day, or are you going to do the right thing and figure out what her ass is up to?” As the latter half of his sentence left his mouth, Lauren came through the door.
“Good morning, good morning. I see you are deep in thought today, care for some brain food.” Lauren carried in a dozen Krispy Kreme donuts and Shadow couldn’t help but cave to the treat. He walked over and snatched up them out of her hands, and gestured for her to take a seat at the table. “So I see you have been meditating this morning as well, is there something bothering you…Dad.”
The word drew him in, but Rev. internally cringed as it pounded through. Lauren’s voice was sincere, but his doubt still dwelled. “Just trying to remember things, and sometimes it helps.”
“Well, ya know, you have been avoiding the question you asked me? I am just wondering what role it plays in this?”
“Drop it.”
Lauren obliged, “Well then, have you given any thought about the McGurk situation, wanna talk about that?”
“No.”
“Fine, well what about you kidnapping a rat?”
“No.”
Lauren finally took a command, “Well then, how about your match.”
Shadow knew he had to divulge something, and she pressed hard with her presence. Truth was, he hadn’t given much thought to the match.
“I am waiting…”
“I hadn’t, but it may do some good.” He tried to sound sincere, but his tone deceived on himself. Rev. knew he couldn’t hide behind the mask around her.
Trist didn’t wait to interject, “Yea, cause you know, arrogance gets your ass nothing.”
Shadow didn’t ling on his words, and instead drifted with his daughters. Lauren ran through him, “Well, I know that you should be aware of this guy’s mental stability.”
Rev. cocked his head; perplexed, “Why do you say that.”
“Well, I can’t be sure, and I mean I am still early on in my studies,” then the uncertainty shifted to expertise, “But from what I have heard about him from the other wrestlers, and other means, well he has either tried to commit suicide, or is suicidal. Take that into account with some other rumors. Basically; it is a cause for concern.”
Suicide was an area that frolicked in his past, but nothing so recent. The Nothingness, the need to focus, and a host of other ideas shrilled through his veins, “What do you think of my mental state?”
Lauren took on a crunch of a confusion, “Why do you ask? And are we going to have another episode like last time?”
“No no, I have found my focus now; I promise you this.”
“Sure his ass has, and I am faire from the land of the fae people,” Trist kept poking but his stick came too short, and made not dent in either Rev. or Lauren.
She then gave in to his will, “I think you are of sound mind, but not so much of heart. After the attack on your best friend, from which you still have no viable answer to give me, I can only assume your reasoning is a heavy one.”
“Already said I didn’t wanna
ing talk about that…”Lauren shut him down, “Yes, and you also wanted my thoughts. I mean, I have no idea what game you are playing here, but you are going to lose if you don’t get your head out of whatever the hell is going on. You don’t have time for it.”
She was right though, and Shadow felt it course through him. The vigor took him by surprise, but in his mind everything was clear. He could see his pieces before him, the moves he had made, and those he would make. Lauren, McGurk, Crow, Penny, Scarlett…Scarlett.
“Hey, are you alright?” Lauren got a good look, and concern took, “Hey, Jason, are you in there…Dad?”
Rev. snapped back, “I have something I have to attend to.”
“Right now?”
“Yes,” Shadow started to gather up his jacket, and a few items.
“So that it is, we aren’t going to talk about your match, your mood, or this?”
He gazed back before exiting, and smiled. “You are correct.”
“Goddamnit!” Lauren shouted, but Rev was gone. She knew that this situation could end badly for her, and had already dodged several phone calls today from her boss. If Shadow didn’t get done what they needed, it was her ass.
The phone vibrated.
“Of course he would
ing call when a thought of him.”---------------------
Scarlett didn't catch the name of the bar when she walked in, nor did she happen to catch the name of the town or city she was in. She frankly just didn't care, as far as the girl was concerned, if life was going to shut her off and beat her, then it was just no use fighting and Scarlett felt compelled to allow the world to guide her towards her next
-up.Scarlett had herself several beers over the course of that morning and if she wasn't careful, it wasn't long before she'd be out of cigs.
"
it,” Scarlett hissed, chugging her head, "Just everything."The bar door was taken for a swing, as soon as she spoke those words. Scarlett didn't bother to watch the incoming patron, but it wasn’t an ordinary occurrence. The good Reverend crept in slow and made his way over to the bar; spotting Scarlett. He had looked for her since the Scars and Stripes.
Revelation compelled him down into a stool, but she didn't even look up. "Excuse me miss, think it may be a little early for a drink?"
Scarlett turned to the patron and scoffed, "You're one to talk."
Scarlett sipped her beer and took a deep breath as she turned away from the patron and just reeled in the nice, warm, glaze that came from the alcohol as it started to take its toll on her.
For now, the world was a lot more tolerable.
"Besides, a question like that is strictly societal. We're wrestlers, as long as we're out of the ring, 'real' time doesn't quite apply to people like us."
"Apply or not, it seems as though time is taking quite the toll on you, and I do mean in 'real time.' The bar tender made way but Shadow cut him off before he could inquire.
"Just a water for me please," and then Rev turned his intent back on Scarlett, "So I have heard that Penny played a role in your downfall." His words were genuine, but his eyes spit venom.
The sound of Penny's name hit Scarlett's last nerve; a stabbing irritant that hurt more than Scarlett would have liked. She clenched her fist and took another deep breath as she sipped her beer.
"Should have seen that one coming, eh? It's my fault- I was too trusting."
"I suppose; but then no matter how vetted the wrestler, surprises exist."
"Like what you did to my dad during the show?" Scarlett rolled her eyes and scoffed. "Scars and Stripes was not a good night for my family."
Rev laughed, "Maybe not, but seeds of change start small. Sometimes we have to look at a turn of events not for what it is, but its probability of becoming.
Sometimes we even have to plant it ourselves."
"What does that mean?"
"Whatever you need it to mean?"
Shadow's words were pleasant, but he didn’t rely on it.
"Take for instance you in this bar right now. How exactly do you see this impacting your life, where is it you are going now?
"Nowhere, that's where!” Scarlett snapped, lighting up one of her last cigarettes now. "I swear to God, I don't know how you've actually managed to make it through your terrible existence and now, you come in on your high horse and try to teach a lesson I'm probably not going to get"
Scarlett sighed and took a nice, long drag.
"I don't get it. All anyone ever seems to want to do is
other people over. And for what? You and my dad looked like you were going fine, maybe you two were a little pissy at each other, but you both seemed fine. I mean, what is it? You were too much of a **** to beat my dad the first time around that the only time you can get it done is now, when he's been retired for over a decade? If it isn't a match, its gold, if it isn't that is just some stupid idea of glory that no one, under these circumstances can ever reach... God."Shadow smiled at Scarlett. He then stood and leaned into her ear; hand pressed on her shoulder, "One cannot see a human being, while standing at the edge of the universe, but life has purpose regardless.
I wouldn't dwell on where I stand too much, but would be wise to give more attention to one’s own placement; terrible as it all may be, but still is consumed with purpose."
Reverend then leaned out and walked out of the bar; leaving Scarlett to her thoughts and her beer.
---------------------------
“Mr. Slinn inquires as to why we have stopped treatment? He also had a few other concerns, one of which was your ability to take care of the patient.” The man wore a slick suit, and no discernible hair on his entire body.
Laura wasn’t fazed, “Tell you what; you tell Mr. Slinn to concern himself with projects that actually need help. I am fine.”
Her hiss did nothing to fade the man’s monotone, “He also feels that the incident involving the acid, was too convenient, given your earlier requests.”
“Are you accusing me something?” Laura’s eyes went dead and, like her dads, they looked right through whoever they found.
He kept this cool, “I accuse you of nothing, but your practices have brought many doubts down the chain of command; I am merely the messenger.”
“Is there something else I should know, or can we be done with this?”
“Actually,” he cleared his throat, “There is a matter of information he is seeking from you, and of that which you are giving.”
“Speak clearly, or move the
on; I don’t have time for this. Jason has a match he needs to win.” Lauren attempted to quicken the conversation.“You spoke of the truth of familial bond; that was an extreme that could result poorly in the results. Mr. Slinn believes this was unnecessary burden. Also, your obsession with his in ring situation has his troubled. It is not professional, and expresses possible alternative motives.”
“Ya know what, you tell Mr. Slinn he can carry his fat ass from his millions of dollars, and come talk to me his
ing self,” Lauren’s tone was tough, “And you can fall off the face of the planet, and if I have to see you again without Mr. Slinn, you’re gonna find out just how much of my dad I have in me.”-----------------------------------
*Past*
Master David looked at Jason with a bit of confusion, “Are you well.”
Jadoa’s eyes deepened, and his face sunk into the bones. David had never had a pupil like Jason, and it scared him at how well he took to the Nothing. Something was right, but he knew that it was already in motion; he couldn’t stop what was never his to control.
“If you are well, then knock twice-pause-knock another 3 times. Kara will let you out, and I would suggest much rest over the never few days. Come back if you need further guidance.” David’s voice shook with uncertainty, but Jason only nodded in approval of the terms.
Jason knocked the proper way, and Kara released the door to the shell of boy she had brought to her special place. His pale face, and black eyes stood glaring into everything; piercing reality.
She led him through the corridors again, but there was no rush. Jason drug along, and Kara couldn’t help but feel responsible for his state. “What happened in there?”
“I was shown what I needed to do to be at peace.”
“Okay?” Skepticism laced her word, “And that is?”
“David was speaking the truth, you just have to let yourself go to the nothing. Everything will make sense then.”
Now Kara was concerned. No one had come out of David’s chamber like that. I mean some weren’t right in the head to begin with, but this was different; too different, but she couldn’t find the reason, or what it meant.
“Tomorrow, you will understand,” was the last thing he said to Kara that night.
Jason returned to his room, and shut the door behind; sealing him in. He sat down from his bed a slipped a small piece of jagged metal from under his sleeve.
“Just have to focus.”
…..To be continued.
