New Dawn RP: Jon Gotch

The Masked Superstar
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New Dawn RP: Jon Gotch May 26, 2015 17:04:42 GMT -5

Post by The Masked Superstar on May 26, 2015 17:04:42 GMT -5

*Jon Gotch stands by a Odin's Hammer Painted on a wall by his house*

May thou be feasting and drinking

In Valhalla for a full night

Before the Kristjan God

Knows that thou art dead.

May thou livest to be a hundred and ten.

And may mine be the last voice

That thou hearest.

Give me power against my opponent.

Or may I feast with the gods, in Valhalla.

*Gotch touches the Painting and then walks into the dark. Gotch could be only found two days later in a cabin in the woods*

My soul is about to face

what is a unholy disgrace

Which I'll hail the New Dawn

against Samael Ahriman

*Gotch notices the camera, and shuts it off in embarrassment. Gotch appeared two days again, but this time looking sickly.*

For my fasting, which won't be long lasting.

I'm doing this to be close to Valhalla.

To see what it is like to feast with the gods.

Because at the New Dawn, I either win or I die and go to the feast of the brave.

*Gotch then starts to write in his journal.*

At the New Dawn I go into a battle with someone I've never met. I've never heard of Samael Ahriman, no matter what I shall train my hardest. I shall go into the woods for the weeks leading up to New Dawn and train, and train like I've never trained before, train to near death. I know I won't die, Odin will protect me. I have prayed to my gods.I have vowed to my gods, that I will win this contest.

*June 2nd Gotch turns on the camera revealing he's a little more buff, and his beard is longer.*

I'm ready to face Samael Ahriman.

I'm doing this for all my fans, if I have any.

To all my fans, I love all you.

I'll win this battle for you and the gods.

It's nearing the time for the New Dawn, I won't be ill-prepared. I'll fight as hard as my viking ancestors did in the old days.

(A little rushed, but my internet is about to go out and I don't know how long.)

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CM Poor
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New Dawn RP: Jon Gotch May 26, 2015 20:04:17 GMT -5 via mobile

Post by CM Poor on May 26, 2015 20:04:17 GMT -5

It feels weird to be replying to an rp before I've even really got the wheels turning on my own, but here we are.

First thing's first - I admire your honest preparedness. You took one on the chin to get something quick out early, not knowing where you'll be closer to deadline time, and that does a helluva lot more service to your opponent than just no-showing, so good on you there.

This is quite the swerve from your last piece, and quite frankly, for however short it is, I liked it just fine. I like that rather than just the whole "rah, look at how tough I am,
I'ma beatchu sucka" thing that so many newcomers fall back on, you're delving into your character's heritage and his past, and if you keep running with it, you're gonna have yourself a nice foundation upon which you can build a rather unique character upon. Hopefully next time you'll be a bit less pressed for time and resource and you'll be able to deliver a bit more substance.

Looking forward to seeing where you go from here.

The Final Boss

I dont know good luck

jdfranchise
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New Dawn RP: Jon Gotch May 26, 2015 22:04:59 GMT -5 via mobile

Post by jdfranchise on May 26, 2015 22:04:59 GMT -5

Completely agree with Brennan here. Going with the heritage route is a nice change up from the bravado we see with a lot of new guys. You are putting some pretty solid pieces together for a good character foundation, and even though it's a short piece due to circumstances it's still pretty well written.

Definitely want to see what you do with your character when you have the time and resources available.

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New Dawn RP: Jon Gotch May 29, 2015 19:46:44 GMT -5

Post by Deleted on May 29, 2015 19:46:44 GMT -5

Even pressed for time, this was well done. Delving into Gotch's background was/is a really good idea to help set you apart from what it usually seen. It's a good idea where if you can build off it, it'll be really well done. Hope your internet comes back up quickly mate.

The Gangsta
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New Dawn RP: Jon Gotch May 29, 2015 20:58:41 GMT -5

Post by The Gangsta on May 29, 2015 20:58:41 GMT -5

For a rushed piece, this was great man. The Norse mythology was a great touch to it and fit very well with the direction Jon Gotch is heading towards. The fact that he is physically devoting himself to the Viking lifestyle adds another nice touch to it. Keep this Norse thing going. It's pretty damn cool. Great job on the RP man.

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The Masked Superstar Mid-Carder Joined on: Jul 11, 2013 0:57:51 GMT -5 Posts: 342	New Dawn RP: Jon Gotch May 29, 2015 21:00:40 GMT -5 The Gangsta likes this Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Back to Top Post by The Masked Superstar on May 29, 2015 21:00:40 GMT -5 I got it fixed last night. I thank everyone for advice on my rushed piece.
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New Dawn RP: Jon Gotch Jun 5, 2015 1:49:09 GMT -5

Post by Mr. PerpetuaLynch Motion on Jun 5, 2015 1:49:09 GMT -5

I like this one just fine, it's a solid piece as far as showing your desires and I really dug the Norse mythology bits and pieces of it (a lot of mythology being thrown around in the writings this week. Haha). The only bits I didn't like, and it's not your fault at all as you were pressed for time, was the jumps in time. But in a weird way it worked too because it was almost like a montage of where Gotch went mentally and physically in his preperation for this match. Overall it was pretty alright. Good luck sir.

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New Dawn RP: Jon Gotch Jun 5, 2015 15:29:48 GMT -5

Post by Rated R on Jun 5, 2015 15:29:48 GMT -5

I think the most impressive thing for me is that when pressed for time you didn't rush out some generic piece, you did something shorter but vastly different to what I was expecting from you. I love it when a new guy goes out of their way to try something different even if it could backfire. This could obviously of been a bit more developed but I liked it and I think it shows that you've got a lot of promise.