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Jokes
Aug 29, 2008 9:44:36 GMT -5
Post by rando on Aug 29, 2008 9:44:36 GMT -5
My favorite joke: Werner Heisenberg was driving down the road and a cop pulled him over. The cop asked "Do you know how fast you were going?" Heisenberg replied "No, but I know where I am."
ha, quantum mechanics are hilarious.
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Jokes
Aug 29, 2008 10:32:59 GMT -5
Post by Sleeping Like An Angel on Aug 29, 2008 10:32:59 GMT -5
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Jokes
Aug 29, 2008 11:04:59 GMT -5
Post by Deadshot on Aug 29, 2008 11:04:59 GMT -5
I was kiddingggg...when you give me that look, it means I was kidding...lol
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Jokes
Aug 29, 2008 16:23:33 GMT -5
Post by chumped on Aug 29, 2008 16:23:33 GMT -5
A dyslexic man walks into a bra I lol'd
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Jokes
Aug 29, 2008 17:05:33 GMT -5
Post by catsarefunny on Aug 29, 2008 17:05:33 GMT -5
A dyslexic man walks into a bra I lol'd That one tickled me the most.
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The Mountain King
Main Eventer
the artist formerly known as FL<O>
Joined on: Feb 19, 2008 17:51:45 GMT -5
Posts: 3,222
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Jokes
Aug 29, 2008 21:26:17 GMT -5
Post by The Mountain King on Aug 29, 2008 21:26:17 GMT -5
so a blonde calls her boyfriend " i need you to come over here and help me with this puzzle" the boyfriend says "ok i'll be right over" when he gets there he takes one look at the peices and says "what is it supposed to be?" and she says "its a rooster" so he looks at it again, then looks at her and says "ok well, lets just go sit down, have a little talk, then we'll come back here and put the cornflakes back in the box"
ZING!
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Jokes
Aug 29, 2008 22:14:52 GMT -5
Post by Kody on Aug 29, 2008 22:14:52 GMT -5
A dyslexic man walks into a bra ..... go on.....
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Jokes
Aug 29, 2008 22:35:07 GMT -5
Post by Phantom on Aug 29, 2008 22:35:07 GMT -5
Knock, Knock. Whose There? Ketchup. ketchup Who? ketchup and find out!
heres another
A blonde goes into a nearby store and asks a clerk if she can buy the TV in the corner. The clerk looks at her and says that he doesn't serve blondes, so she goes back home and dyes her hair black. The next day she returns to the store and asks the same thing, and again, the clerk said he doesn't serve blondes. Frustrated, the blonde goes home and dyes her hair yet again, to a shade of red. Sure that a clerk would sell her the TV this time, she returns and asks a different clerk this time. To her astonishment, this clerk also says that she doesn't serve blondes. The blonde asks the clerk, "How in the world do you know I am a blonde?" The clerk looks at her disgustedly and says,"That's not a TV -- it's a microwave!" and one more
Just then, the dog noticed some bones laying on the ground close by. The dog immediately settles down to chew on the bones with his back to the approaching leopard. Just as the jungle cat is about to leap, the dog loudly says, “My, that was one delicious leopard! I wonder if there are any more around here?”
Hearing this, the leopard slinks away. “That was too close,” thought the leopard, “that dog nearly had me.”
Meanwhile, a mischevious monkey had observed the entire scene, and decided to cause trouble for the dog, while getting on the good side of the leopard as well. The monkey dashed off after the leopard, to tell him what truly happened.
The dog saw the monkey dash off, and suspiciously tailed him from behind. He overhears the monkey spilling the beans, and quickly decides on a course of action, racing back to the pile of bones.
At the same time, the leopard has decided to take care of the dog once and for all. The monkey hops on the leopard’s back, to watch the demise of the doomed dog. As the leopard approaches, he can hear the dog talking to himself: “Where’s that lazy monkey? I sent him off half an hour ago for another leopard, and he’s still not back!”
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Jokes
Aug 29, 2008 23:35:37 GMT -5
Post by Focalin on Aug 29, 2008 23:35:37 GMT -5
3 Irish guys walk of out a bar....
...hey..it COULD happen!
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Jokes
Aug 29, 2008 23:40:43 GMT -5
Post by dms on Aug 29, 2008 23:40:43 GMT -5
A dyslexic man walks into a bra That's one of my favorites. I told it the other day and no one got it. Idiots.
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Jokes
Aug 29, 2008 23:45:16 GMT -5
Post by Slay on Aug 29, 2008 23:45:16 GMT -5
Women's rights....has been done already... .....uhm.....abortion...haha.....I don't know....
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Jokes
Aug 29, 2008 23:54:46 GMT -5
Post by chumped on Aug 29, 2008 23:54:46 GMT -5
3 Irish guys walk of out a bar.... ...hey..it COULD happen! Well played.
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Jokes
Aug 30, 2008 8:39:53 GMT -5
Post by 51 on Aug 30, 2008 8:39:53 GMT -5
Knock, Knock. Whose There? Ketchup. ketchup Who? ketchup and find out! heres another A blonde goes into a nearby store and asks a clerk if she can buy the TV in the corner. The clerk looks at her and says that he doesn't serve blondes, so she goes back home and dyes her hair black. The next day she returns to the store and asks the same thing, and again, the clerk said he doesn't serve blondes. Frustrated, the blonde goes home and dyes her hair yet again, to a shade of red. Sure that a clerk would sell her the TV this time, she returns and asks a different clerk this time. To her astonishment, this clerk also says that she doesn't serve blondes. The blonde asks the clerk, "How in the world do you know I am a blonde?" The clerk looks at her disgustedly and says,"That's not a TV -- it's a microwave!" and one more Just then, the dog noticed some bones laying on the ground close by. The dog immediately settles down to chew on the bones with his back to the approaching leopard. Just as the jungle cat is about to leap, the dog loudly says, “My, that was one delicious leopard! I wonder if there are any more around here?” Hearing this, the leopard slinks away. “That was too close,” thought the leopard, “that dog nearly had me.” Meanwhile, a mischevious monkey had observed the entire scene, and decided to cause trouble for the dog, while getting on the good side of the leopard as well. The monkey dashed off after the leopard, to tell him what truly happened. The dog saw the monkey dash off, and suspiciously tailed him from behind. He overhears the monkey spilling the beans, and quickly decides on a course of action, racing back to the pile of bones. At the same time, the leopard has decided to take care of the dog once and for all. The monkey hops on the leopard’s back, to watch the demise of the doomed dog. As the leopard approaches, he can hear the dog talking to himself: “Where’s that lazy monkey? I sent him off half an hour ago for another leopard, and he’s still not back!” The last two are great, thanks.
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Jokes
Aug 30, 2008 9:36:15 GMT -5
Post by ericbischoff on Aug 30, 2008 9:36:15 GMT -5
I have tons of joke, and lots of people LOVED my joke, even they was laughed for hours and hours, but I ain't going to post the joke on here, because all of my joke is offensive jokes, such as dirty joke (Most of you're underage anyway), racist, gender, etc. I'd get warning bars or banned if I post one joke on here.
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Jokes
Aug 30, 2008 9:47:48 GMT -5
Post by Gene on Aug 30, 2008 9:47:48 GMT -5
The cat fell in the well and the rooster laughed. This goes to show you... ...a wet pussy makes a cock happy.
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Deleted
Joined on: Jun 1, 2024 6:42:05 GMT -5
Posts: 0
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Jokes
Aug 30, 2008 9:57:50 GMT -5
Post by Deleted on Aug 30, 2008 9:57:50 GMT -5
What's the difference between an Irish Wedding and a Irish Funerul?
One less drunk.
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Jokes
Aug 30, 2008 13:34:58 GMT -5
Post by dms on Aug 30, 2008 13:34:58 GMT -5
What's with all the Irish jokes? ;[
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Jokes
Aug 30, 2008 13:44:42 GMT -5
Post by Phantom on Aug 30, 2008 13:44:42 GMT -5
while im on a roll heres another one I know,
Two aliens landed in the Arizona desert near an abandoned gas station. They approached one of the gas pumps, and one of the aliens addressed it.
"Greetings, Earthling. We come in peace. Take us to your leader."
The gas pump of course, didn't respond. The alien repeated the greeting. Again there was no response. The alien, annoyed by what he perceived to be the gas pumps haughty attitude, drew his ray gun, and said impatiently, "Greetings earthling. We come in peace. How dare you ignore us in this way! Take us to your leader, or I'll fire!"
The other alien shouted to his comrade, "No, you don't want to make him mad, he looks like a bada$$" But before he finished his warning, the first alien fired.
There was a huge explosion that blew both of them 200 meters into the desert, where they landed in a heap rather abruptly. When they finally regained consciousness, the one who fired turned to the other one and said, "What a ferocious creature. It damn near killed us! How did you know he was such a bada$$?"
The other alien answered, "If there's one thing I've learned during my travels through the galaxy, when a guy can wrap his d*ck around his waist three times and stick it in his ear, hes a bada$$.
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Jokes
Aug 30, 2008 13:51:50 GMT -5
Post by jomoishollywood on Aug 30, 2008 13:51:50 GMT -5
I have tons of joke, and lots of people LOVED my joke, even they was laughed for hours and hours, but I ain't going to post the joke on here, because all of my joke is offensive jokes, such as dirty joke (Most of you're underage anyway), racist, gender, etc. I'd get warning bars or banned if I post one joke on here. Do you have any deaf jokes?
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Jokes
Aug 30, 2008 14:02:40 GMT -5
Post by ericbischoff on Aug 30, 2008 14:02:40 GMT -5
I have tons of joke, and lots of people LOVED my joke, even they was laughed for hours and hours, but I ain't going to post the joke on here, because all of my joke is offensive jokes, such as dirty joke (Most of you're underage anyway), racist, gender, etc. I'd get warning bars or banned if I post one joke on here. Do you have any deaf jokes? Yeah, I do. I got lots of jokes about 3 men (England, Scotland, And Irish)
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