Post by thecrapper on Dec 19, 2008 22:18:05 GMT -5
Sunday Night Crap
Damian Demento vs Gilberg
Winner: Demento in 10:24 with a choke slam
Repo man vs Test
Winner: Test in 8:44 with the pump handle slam
Waylon Mercy vs Snitsky
Winner: Waylon Mercy in 22:09 with a sleeper hold
Show #156
Shockmaster vs Ludvig Borga(c) for the WTF title
Winner: Shockmaster in 15:49 with a big splash
Ken Patera vs Tugboat
Winner: Tugboat in 14:46 with a big splash
Ken Patera is shown driving around on Christmas eve. He is looking for a place to eat and every place is closed. He gets pissed gets out of his car in front of a McDonalds and picks up a boulder to throw threw the window, just as he is about to throw the boulder, he looks over and says OOOOH!!!!! Waffle House is open. Patera says awesome and drop the boulder and it lands on his foot as he screams in pain. Next shot we see him walking in to the Waffle House limping. They give him a seat and is told the waitress will be with you in a second. A time lapse thing pops up saying 60-min later. Patera is shown sitting there pissed he asks the hostess where the waitress is he has been sitting there for over an hour and nobody has even gotten him a drink yet. The waitress say Oh god, Fine what do you want? Patera says screw this and picks up a table and throws it threw a window. He then climbs through the broken window and leaves.Ken Patera is about to get in his car when he sees a homeless man eating a sandwich, Patera walks up punches the homeless man in the face and steals his food. Patera looks in to the camera ands says What? I'm Hungry, Hungry Ken Patera.
Heidenreich vs Nailz
Winner: Heidenreich in 12:24 with a shoulder breaker
Kamala and Akeem vs Lord Hugo/Zeus(c) for the Tag Titles
Winner: Kamala and Akeem in 19:44 when Kamala pinned Zeus after stomping on his face
A shot of a near buy Shopping mall is shown with Frosty the Snowman playing, Snitsky is shown entering the line to meet Santa Clause with Heidenreich, Snitsky is so excited. While Heidenreich is embarrassed to be seen in a line with a bunch of kids and snitsky. Snitsky is wearing his tights and a Santa hat and a really awful Christmas sweater. Snitsky is telling Heidenreich what he is going to ask for he says a football, a wii, a new pair of shoes, his job back with WWE (Heidenreich says me too) and the High School Musical DVD's. Heidenreich looks at him confused. Snitsky says What. I love musicals. Heidenreich says screw this, I'm going to the Hot Topic to hit on some fat Gothic chicks. Snitsky says OK, on the way back pick me up a Pretzel. Heidenreich says no and walks off. Some kid pees on Santa's lap and makes Santa leave for a few minute to change pants. Snitsky gets impatient, just then the kid behind him sneezes on him. Snitsky turns around and gives the kid the big boot. The kids parents says why did you do that, Snitsky says because its flu season dammit and your kid is spreading germs.Just as Santa's comes back Snitsky is next in line, the mall cops show up and arrest Snitsky for kicking a kid. Snitsky says it wasn't my fault he sneezed on me. Snitsky starts battling with the mall cops, all of a sudden on the cops walkies talkie an announcement is made that someone is shoplifting from the gap and its Nailz, Nailz runs by wearing another awful Christmas sweater with the jeans in his hand that he's stolen. The cop all chase Nailz. Santa tries to restrain Snitsky while the cops are busy, Snitsky gives Santa the pump handle slam. All the kids in line scream that he hurt Santa, and they all run and attack snitsky they are kicking the crap out of him, at that point Heidenreich walks up sees Snitsky getting his ass kicked by 20 little kids and does a face palm, and curls up in the fetal position sucking his thumb.
Meat and Big Dick Johnson vs Black Scorpion and Papa Shango
Winner: Scorpion and Shango in 15:32 when Scorpion pinned BDJ with a small package
A montage is shown of the wrestlers giving each other gifts. Arquette gets Shatner a full replica captains chair from star trek. Shatner says oh goody!! now I have enough of these chairs to replace every chair in my house three times over. Papa Shango gives black Scorpion a wand, Scorpion says a wand? what am I going to do with this, stick it in my ass. Shango says fine if that's how your going to be then you might as well stick it there. Shango storms off, Black Scorpin stares at the wand and then at his ass and nods. Akeem get Kamala the new Kanye West album and Kamala not knowing what it is tries to eat it. Russo gives Patera a get out of jail free from the monopoly game, patera gets mad and throws Eugene threw a window. Lenny and Johnny B Badd exchange hehs for Christmas, Lenny says every year the same thing and it never gets old. Skinner gets outback jack chewing tabbaco and Outback Jack gets skinner Aussie beer. They look at the gifts sad, and they trade gifts back to each other and smile.Lobsterman and Super Porky exchange gift cards for places to eat. Porky gets a BBQ place and Lobsterman get red lobster. Snitsky get heidenreich a big book filled with poetry, and Heidenreich gets Snitsky the High School Musical DVDs he wanted so bad. Snitsky smiles. Mae Young is shown saying to the camera I got Russo my Puppies for Christmas. she runs into his office shuts the door behind her and you can hear her yelling Merry Christmas Vince Russo, Here's your gift my puppies, Vince Russo is Heard screaming for help. Lord Hugo walks by stops looks at the camera shrugs and walks off.
King Booger and Jay Leno vs David Arquette and William Shatner
Winner: Booger and Leno in 20:20 when booger pinned arquette after hitting a huge lariat
TNCW#X
Start of show
We start with a Great Khali Christmas Special. The intro music is "Carol of the Bells" done by a Punjabi sitar band. Khali introduces his guests, but no one in the production truck can understand him so the just show pictures of black silhouettes with question marks. As they show each one, Khali looks strangely satisfied. The first segment is Khali skiing down a mountain when Chuck Norris skies up next to him. They talk about their favorite Christmas carols. Chuck Norris just smiles awkwardly and nods at everything Khali says until Khali crashes into a tree and Norris keeps going. Next we see Khali going caroling with Roseanne. Khali sings gibberish and Roseanne sound like a dying whale so people run in terror wherever they go. They come up to Sid's house. Sid throws Gary Coleman at them. Khali gives Coleman the chop. Next we see them at Bob Saget's house. Saget calls the cops. Khali throws a snowball so big at Saget's front door that it knocks the door down. Saget yells "Jesse, Joey! ...Michelle?" Next Khali is interviewing guests in a fireplace set. Out comes that guy who played Donkey Lips on Salute Your Shorts. Our production crew was too lazy to look up his real name and since he hasn't done anything in like ten years, no one would care. Khali looks at the director all pissed off and gives Donkey Lips the chop and yells "Next!" Next comes the guy who did the voice for Big John Studd on one episode of "Hulk Hogan's Rock n' Wrestling," Chuck Licini. Khali looks at the director, obviously confused and frustrated. Khali tells Mantaur, who is wearing reindeer horns, to bite the director.
Flairs Little Ponies(c) vs The Large Lovers(Viscera and Mark Henry) for the tag titles
Winner: The Large Lovers in 12:35 when Viscera made mongo tap with the cobra clutch
Lodi vs Karl Malone
Winner: Karl Malone in 9:13 with an elbow drop
Chris Masters vs Psycosis
Winner: Psycosis in 14:57 with a hurcarana
Ice Train is depressed backstage, all of a sudden of a sudden a big light appears and standing there is Ice Trains Guardian Angel who ends up being The Dark Patriot, he asks Ice Train what the problem is, Ice Train replies my life and Career is going nowhere. The Patriots replies that's true, you do suck. I'm going to take you back in time to show you what WCW would have been like if you were never born. They go back to WCW Nitro around the mid to late 90s. He sees the nights card and he notices The Armstrongs vs Fire and Ice, Ice train says hold on im still on the card i was in Fire and Ice, The Dark Patriot says not quite he points and we see the new fire and ice, Glacier and Scott Norton, Ice Train asks if Glacier took my spot in the team, who took his spot? Patriot shows him and its Terra Ryzing, Ice Train shocked says Triple H!!!!!! Patriot replies yeah, without you, there never was a Triple H, he never made it to WWE. Instead Savio Vega is a 12-time world champion. Ice Train says Savio Vega?? dear god, what have I done? I want to Job, I want to Job!!!! Patriot takes him back to reality, Sid walks up and says your not on the card tonight, so heres a tooth brush, ice train asks what is that for, sid replies clean every bathroom in the arena all 40 of them, and be careful around the 300 seats Mantaur took a massive dump and missed the toilet for about 85% of it. Ice Train says maybe Savio Vega as champion isn't bad after all, sid replies says Savio Vega!!! I hate that guy and power bombs Ice Train, Ice Train who is half out of it says Dark Patriot I want to go back, Sid says I hate the patriot, both of them and powerbombs Ice Trains Guardian angel.
The Great Khali and Mantaur vs Dennis Rodman and Arnold S
Winner: Rodman and Arnold in 11:57 when arnold pinned mantaur with the terminator
Steve-O vs Double J Jeff Jarrett
Winner: Jeff Jarrett in 9:50 with the figure 4 leg lock
Triple B is at home, he is healing from last months beating,both of his legs are in casts as he's laying on his couch. Virgil is there to interview him about what he's going to do about his masked attacker? Triple B says I have something to deal with that and pulls out a hand gun from out of the couch cushions.Virgil is shocked he asks what he's going to do with it. Triple B says whatever it takes. Then outside of the home the masked man comes up holding a jar, waiting for him are a couple of Triple B friends who are easy to beat up. The masked man comes up to the front window where Triple B see's him. Triple B flips out and tries to shoot him, but the masked man moves and Triple B only shoots the window. The recoil from the gun makes triple b fly back and drops the gun, the masked man stands up sticks his arm threw the broken window and opens the jar. Out from the jar come dozens and dozens of bees, however instead of attacking Triple B, they go after the masked man as runs off screaming. Triple B who fell of the the couch, hit his head on the table and is bleeding, he looks up at virgil who is scared and pissed him self and its all over the carpet, Triple B says I got him, and oh your paying to clean my carpet.
The Karate Kommandos vs Johnny Polo and Adam Bomb
Winner: Karate Kommandos in 20:59 when Blackman pinned polo with a perfect plex
Boogeyman vs Kiss Demon
Winner: Kiss Demon in 11:38 with a powerbomb
K-fed vs Jason the Terrible(c) for the King of the Crap title
Winner: Jason the Terrible in 15:25 with a sitout powerbomb
Damian Demento vs Gilberg
Winner: Demento in 10:24 with a choke slam
Repo man vs Test
Winner: Test in 8:44 with the pump handle slam
Waylon Mercy vs Snitsky
Winner: Waylon Mercy in 22:09 with a sleeper hold
Show #156
Shockmaster vs Ludvig Borga(c) for the WTF title
Winner: Shockmaster in 15:49 with a big splash
Ken Patera vs Tugboat
Winner: Tugboat in 14:46 with a big splash
Ken Patera is shown driving around on Christmas eve. He is looking for a place to eat and every place is closed. He gets pissed gets out of his car in front of a McDonalds and picks up a boulder to throw threw the window, just as he is about to throw the boulder, he looks over and says OOOOH!!!!! Waffle House is open. Patera says awesome and drop the boulder and it lands on his foot as he screams in pain. Next shot we see him walking in to the Waffle House limping. They give him a seat and is told the waitress will be with you in a second. A time lapse thing pops up saying 60-min later. Patera is shown sitting there pissed he asks the hostess where the waitress is he has been sitting there for over an hour and nobody has even gotten him a drink yet. The waitress say Oh god, Fine what do you want? Patera says screw this and picks up a table and throws it threw a window. He then climbs through the broken window and leaves.Ken Patera is about to get in his car when he sees a homeless man eating a sandwich, Patera walks up punches the homeless man in the face and steals his food. Patera looks in to the camera ands says What? I'm Hungry, Hungry Ken Patera.
Heidenreich vs Nailz
Winner: Heidenreich in 12:24 with a shoulder breaker
Kamala and Akeem vs Lord Hugo/Zeus(c) for the Tag Titles
Winner: Kamala and Akeem in 19:44 when Kamala pinned Zeus after stomping on his face
A shot of a near buy Shopping mall is shown with Frosty the Snowman playing, Snitsky is shown entering the line to meet Santa Clause with Heidenreich, Snitsky is so excited. While Heidenreich is embarrassed to be seen in a line with a bunch of kids and snitsky. Snitsky is wearing his tights and a Santa hat and a really awful Christmas sweater. Snitsky is telling Heidenreich what he is going to ask for he says a football, a wii, a new pair of shoes, his job back with WWE (Heidenreich says me too) and the High School Musical DVD's. Heidenreich looks at him confused. Snitsky says What. I love musicals. Heidenreich says screw this, I'm going to the Hot Topic to hit on some fat Gothic chicks. Snitsky says OK, on the way back pick me up a Pretzel. Heidenreich says no and walks off. Some kid pees on Santa's lap and makes Santa leave for a few minute to change pants. Snitsky gets impatient, just then the kid behind him sneezes on him. Snitsky turns around and gives the kid the big boot. The kids parents says why did you do that, Snitsky says because its flu season dammit and your kid is spreading germs.Just as Santa's comes back Snitsky is next in line, the mall cops show up and arrest Snitsky for kicking a kid. Snitsky says it wasn't my fault he sneezed on me. Snitsky starts battling with the mall cops, all of a sudden on the cops walkies talkie an announcement is made that someone is shoplifting from the gap and its Nailz, Nailz runs by wearing another awful Christmas sweater with the jeans in his hand that he's stolen. The cop all chase Nailz. Santa tries to restrain Snitsky while the cops are busy, Snitsky gives Santa the pump handle slam. All the kids in line scream that he hurt Santa, and they all run and attack snitsky they are kicking the crap out of him, at that point Heidenreich walks up sees Snitsky getting his ass kicked by 20 little kids and does a face palm, and curls up in the fetal position sucking his thumb.
Meat and Big Dick Johnson vs Black Scorpion and Papa Shango
Winner: Scorpion and Shango in 15:32 when Scorpion pinned BDJ with a small package
A montage is shown of the wrestlers giving each other gifts. Arquette gets Shatner a full replica captains chair from star trek. Shatner says oh goody!! now I have enough of these chairs to replace every chair in my house three times over. Papa Shango gives black Scorpion a wand, Scorpion says a wand? what am I going to do with this, stick it in my ass. Shango says fine if that's how your going to be then you might as well stick it there. Shango storms off, Black Scorpin stares at the wand and then at his ass and nods. Akeem get Kamala the new Kanye West album and Kamala not knowing what it is tries to eat it. Russo gives Patera a get out of jail free from the monopoly game, patera gets mad and throws Eugene threw a window. Lenny and Johnny B Badd exchange hehs for Christmas, Lenny says every year the same thing and it never gets old. Skinner gets outback jack chewing tabbaco and Outback Jack gets skinner Aussie beer. They look at the gifts sad, and they trade gifts back to each other and smile.Lobsterman and Super Porky exchange gift cards for places to eat. Porky gets a BBQ place and Lobsterman get red lobster. Snitsky get heidenreich a big book filled with poetry, and Heidenreich gets Snitsky the High School Musical DVDs he wanted so bad. Snitsky smiles. Mae Young is shown saying to the camera I got Russo my Puppies for Christmas. she runs into his office shuts the door behind her and you can hear her yelling Merry Christmas Vince Russo, Here's your gift my puppies, Vince Russo is Heard screaming for help. Lord Hugo walks by stops looks at the camera shrugs and walks off.
King Booger and Jay Leno vs David Arquette and William Shatner
Winner: Booger and Leno in 20:20 when booger pinned arquette after hitting a huge lariat
TNCW#X
Start of show
We start with a Great Khali Christmas Special. The intro music is "Carol of the Bells" done by a Punjabi sitar band. Khali introduces his guests, but no one in the production truck can understand him so the just show pictures of black silhouettes with question marks. As they show each one, Khali looks strangely satisfied. The first segment is Khali skiing down a mountain when Chuck Norris skies up next to him. They talk about their favorite Christmas carols. Chuck Norris just smiles awkwardly and nods at everything Khali says until Khali crashes into a tree and Norris keeps going. Next we see Khali going caroling with Roseanne. Khali sings gibberish and Roseanne sound like a dying whale so people run in terror wherever they go. They come up to Sid's house. Sid throws Gary Coleman at them. Khali gives Coleman the chop. Next we see them at Bob Saget's house. Saget calls the cops. Khali throws a snowball so big at Saget's front door that it knocks the door down. Saget yells "Jesse, Joey! ...Michelle?" Next Khali is interviewing guests in a fireplace set. Out comes that guy who played Donkey Lips on Salute Your Shorts. Our production crew was too lazy to look up his real name and since he hasn't done anything in like ten years, no one would care. Khali looks at the director all pissed off and gives Donkey Lips the chop and yells "Next!" Next comes the guy who did the voice for Big John Studd on one episode of "Hulk Hogan's Rock n' Wrestling," Chuck Licini. Khali looks at the director, obviously confused and frustrated. Khali tells Mantaur, who is wearing reindeer horns, to bite the director.
Flairs Little Ponies(c) vs The Large Lovers(Viscera and Mark Henry) for the tag titles
Winner: The Large Lovers in 12:35 when Viscera made mongo tap with the cobra clutch
Lodi vs Karl Malone
Winner: Karl Malone in 9:13 with an elbow drop
Chris Masters vs Psycosis
Winner: Psycosis in 14:57 with a hurcarana
Ice Train is depressed backstage, all of a sudden of a sudden a big light appears and standing there is Ice Trains Guardian Angel who ends up being The Dark Patriot, he asks Ice Train what the problem is, Ice Train replies my life and Career is going nowhere. The Patriots replies that's true, you do suck. I'm going to take you back in time to show you what WCW would have been like if you were never born. They go back to WCW Nitro around the mid to late 90s. He sees the nights card and he notices The Armstrongs vs Fire and Ice, Ice train says hold on im still on the card i was in Fire and Ice, The Dark Patriot says not quite he points and we see the new fire and ice, Glacier and Scott Norton, Ice Train asks if Glacier took my spot in the team, who took his spot? Patriot shows him and its Terra Ryzing, Ice Train shocked says Triple H!!!!!! Patriot replies yeah, without you, there never was a Triple H, he never made it to WWE. Instead Savio Vega is a 12-time world champion. Ice Train says Savio Vega?? dear god, what have I done? I want to Job, I want to Job!!!! Patriot takes him back to reality, Sid walks up and says your not on the card tonight, so heres a tooth brush, ice train asks what is that for, sid replies clean every bathroom in the arena all 40 of them, and be careful around the 300 seats Mantaur took a massive dump and missed the toilet for about 85% of it. Ice Train says maybe Savio Vega as champion isn't bad after all, sid replies says Savio Vega!!! I hate that guy and power bombs Ice Train, Ice Train who is half out of it says Dark Patriot I want to go back, Sid says I hate the patriot, both of them and powerbombs Ice Trains Guardian angel.
The Great Khali and Mantaur vs Dennis Rodman and Arnold S
Winner: Rodman and Arnold in 11:57 when arnold pinned mantaur with the terminator
Steve-O vs Double J Jeff Jarrett
Winner: Jeff Jarrett in 9:50 with the figure 4 leg lock
Triple B is at home, he is healing from last months beating,both of his legs are in casts as he's laying on his couch. Virgil is there to interview him about what he's going to do about his masked attacker? Triple B says I have something to deal with that and pulls out a hand gun from out of the couch cushions.Virgil is shocked he asks what he's going to do with it. Triple B says whatever it takes. Then outside of the home the masked man comes up holding a jar, waiting for him are a couple of Triple B friends who are easy to beat up. The masked man comes up to the front window where Triple B see's him. Triple B flips out and tries to shoot him, but the masked man moves and Triple B only shoots the window. The recoil from the gun makes triple b fly back and drops the gun, the masked man stands up sticks his arm threw the broken window and opens the jar. Out from the jar come dozens and dozens of bees, however instead of attacking Triple B, they go after the masked man as runs off screaming. Triple B who fell of the the couch, hit his head on the table and is bleeding, he looks up at virgil who is scared and pissed him self and its all over the carpet, Triple B says I got him, and oh your paying to clean my carpet.
The Karate Kommandos vs Johnny Polo and Adam Bomb
Winner: Karate Kommandos in 20:59 when Blackman pinned polo with a perfect plex
Boogeyman vs Kiss Demon
Winner: Kiss Demon in 11:38 with a powerbomb
K-fed vs Jason the Terrible(c) for the King of the Crap title
Winner: Jason the Terrible in 15:25 with a sitout powerbomb
