Post by sonstuds on Oct 15, 2010 15:25:00 GMT -5
"Eminence Front" by The Who (official theme wut wut wut) plays as a really well done opening video package plays. I'll be up front; I'm just too lazy to write one. And do you really want to read something that sucks but is written like it's actually good? So thus ... here we are ...
[/color]Matthew Werner:[/color] ... Live, from Denver Colorado!
Yeah![/color]
The arena goes dark. "Gimme Shelter" by The Rolling Stones begins to take over the PA System. As soon as the heavy guitar and drums start, the lights in the arena begin to slowly flicker, gold and black. Davey Sanchez then slowly walks through the curtain and makes his way down the ramp.
Keri Thames:[/color] The following match is scheduled for one fall! First, from the city of Lost Angels, he is Davey Sanchez!
Sanchez slowly approaches the ring apron and pauses. He looks over to both sides and slowly takes off his trench coat. He then climbs up the apron and goes to the turnbuckle on his right. He climbs up and salutes to the crowd. He then hops over the top rope into the ring and waits in the corner for his opponent.
"Hunt You Down" by Saliva plays and Chris Jackal makes his way out from behind the curtain. He wears a MMA T-Shirt to the ring as well. He stops on the stage and gets on one knee. He pounds his chest and extends his arms out. Blue and Red pyro blasts off. He gets up and high fives some fans.
Keri Thames:[/color] And the opponent, from Buffalo, New York, he is Chris Jackal!
Before getting into the ring, Jackal makes a fist and kisses his index knuckle. He then climbs the top turn buckle and then pounds on his chest before extending his arms out. He decends from the turnbuckle and looks at his seasoned opponent. The ref calls for the bell.
Ding! Ding! Ding!
The two men, the same size and similar style, tie up. Sanchez takes over with a quick headlock, but is quickly shoved off by Jackal, who counters with a headlock of his own. Jackal releases and swings Sanchez up and over for a snapmare and locks him into another headlock. Sanchez flops around a bit, trying to get out of the hold. He is able to twist himself so he has enough leverage to pick up Jackal and drop him down right on his spine.
Matthew Werner:[/color] Davey Sanchez with some serious veteran instinct right there.
Sanchez pulls Jackal up to his feet. He attempts a suplex, but Jackal blocks and hits a snap suplex on Sanchez. Jackal bounces off of the opposite ropes and drops the now reaction-standing Sanchez with a bulldog. Sanchez once more flops to his knees this time, and Jackal hits a beautiful shining wizard on Sanchez. Jackal goes for the cover.
Matthew Werner:[/color] It must be over!
… 1 …
… 2 …
Kickout at two! Jackal senses that Sanchez is injured though He pounds on Sanchez a bit and then hits a standing moonsault. Cover.
… 1 …
Sanchez kicks out and somehow twists Jackal so his shoulders are now on the mat in a very weird looking roll-up crucifix-like pin.
… 1 …
… 2 …
Jackal rolls out of it backwards and gets to his feet with Sanchez still on his shoulders. He runs forward and hits a standing Pearl River Plunge. Sanchez is out. Jackal hears the fans cheering his name and points up in the air, calling for the end. He climbs the turnbuckle and the fans cheer as he leaps off, executing a perfect Shooting Star Press.
… 1 …
… 2 …
… 3 …
Ding! Ding! Ding!
Keri Thames:[/color] Here is your winner, Chris Jackal!
Matthew Werner:[/color] Impressive win there by Jackal.
Matt Steel:[/color] Ho-hum. It was nice I suppose.
Matthew Werner:[/color] What's your beef? And did you just say “ho-hum” ...?
Matt Steel:[/color] Alex Sean, DGX and EBR are all on the card later tonight. I'm just trying to contain my excitement until then!
Matthew Werner:[/color] Fair enough.
Matt Steel:[/color] XWA representin'.
Following the match, WFWF Wrestler Cameron Stone is seen exiting the Locker Room. Stone is already in his wrestling gear as he has a huge opportunity tonight to win the WFWF Tag Team Championships. He doesn‘t get far before “The Black Dahlia” Tabitha Owens approaches him. She smiles and he nods to greet her.
Tabitha Owens: Say, don‘t you have a really big match tonight?
Cameron Stone: Sure do…fighting for the Tag Titles…
Tabitha Owens: With that Bible Thumper, Malakai, right? You know…I‘m pretty sure Braden and I should have been considered for those titles a very long time ago.
Before Cameron Stone has the chance to respond, Braden Munroe rushes him from behind with a Steel Chair in hand. He cracks the chair over the back of Stone‘s head, bringing him down to his knees. Tabitha gets a couple of kicks in before Braden brings the chair swiftly to the side of Cameron‘s head at least five times. As Stone goes down, completely disoriented, Munroe and Owens begin to kick away at him, stiffly, just humiliating him if he had any way of knowing what was going on. The pair hear the security guards coming so they drop the steel chair over Stone‘s head and run off.
We cut back to Matthew Werner and Matt Steel.
Matthew Werner:[/color] What the hell!? What possibly justifies that!?
Matt Steel:[/color] I dunno, but after doing commentary with them on the last episode of Loaded I can vouch that Braden Munroe and Tabitha Owens are cool cats, so I bet there's a very logical explanation. I give people the benefit of the doubt. It's one of my best qualities.
“Broken Dreams” by Shaman's Harvest echoes as fire shoots from the ramp. Lightning enters the stage as red and gold lights flicker in the arena. He stands at the ramp and raises his right fist in the air and puts his left hand over his heart. He walks down the ramp.
Keri Thames:[/color] The following match is a battle royal to determine the third and final participant in the WFWF National Championship match later tonight! First, Lightning!
Lightning steps into the ring. As he does, “Brackish” by Kittie plays over the PA System, Lightning smiling at his teammate coming out from behind the curtain. Johnny Albright raises his arms up in the air to little reaction from the fans.
Keri Thames:[/color] Second, Johnny Albright!
Albright makes it down the ramp and rolls into the ring. “Mess of Me” by Switchfoot resonates through the arena as the fans get on their feet, guys and girls for different reasons, as Valorie Evans comes out from behind the curtain, smiling and confident. She stands with her hands on her hips, looking out at the masses and the two men in the ring and points up in the air and makes her way down the ramp.
Keri Thames:[/color] Third, Valorie Evans!
Matthew Werner:[/color] Uhhhhhhhhhhhh...
Matthew Werner:[/color] Close your jaw, Steel.
Evans blows a guy in the crowd a kiss and pulls herself up onto the apron and into the ring. “Insomnia” by Periphery resonates through the arena as Lawrence Cage bursts through from out behind the curtain. Spreading his arms out to pose, light pyros go off behind him to form an “L.C.”
Keri Thames:[/color] Fourth, Lawrence Cage!
Cage makes it to the ring, slapping hands with a few fans. “Fire In My Soul” by Bonnie Tyler plays as Justin Tyger comes out from behind the curtain to the excitement of the fans.
Keri Thames:[/color] Fifth and finally, Justin Tyger.
The fans are going crazy for Tyger as he slaps hands with them and rolls into the ring. The ref calls for the bell.
Ding! Ding! Ding!
Tyger panders to the crowd, raising his arms, paying no mind to the other four wrestlers in the ring. Big mistake. The other four come up behind Tyger and dump him up and over the ropes immeadiately.
Keri Thames:[/color] Justin Tyger is eliminated!
Matthew Werner:[/color] Whoops.
Matthew Werner:[/color] Hey, and will you look at that? It's the Hardcore Horsemen against Cage and the light of my life.
Matthew Werner:[/color] **facepalm**
Evans begins to attempt some offense against Lightning while Cage is taking on Albright. Lightning catches one of Evans's punches and twists her arm and...
The screen goes black and in red letters, PSA appears. The emergency weather voice guy begins to speak:
“The WFWF does not in any way condone domestic violence, including but not limited to beating a bitch, smacking a hoe or anything of the sort. Domestic violence is not a laughing matter. If you feel you have been abused, please call your local police. Thank you.”
...punches her square in the face, knocking her right to the mat. Lightning gets a devious smile on his face and a bad idea in his mind when all of a sudden, he cringes and bends over as he's just been punches in the gonads. Evans uppercuts Lightning and dumps him over the ropes, accepting a round of applause from the crowd, the loudest being from Matt Steel.
Keri Thames:[/color] Lightning has been eliminated!
Albright tosses Cage across the ring. He charges and drops him again with a violent clothesline. He then sets his sights on Evans, who wisely rolls out of the ring under the bottom rope. Albright, in a frenzy, goes over the top and tries to smoosh Evans, who simply sidesteps the flying man. He did fly over the top rope though so...
Keri Thames:[/color] Johnny Albright has been eliminated!
Evans rolls into the ring and stands over the downed Cage and is able to get him to his feet. She drives him into the corner and begins driving her boot into his gut and chest repeatedly. She takes a step back and leaps up in the air, turning and catching him right in the chest with a jump side kick. Cage invoulentarily comes off of the turnbuckle and Evans hits a rather sloppy but effective Japanese Arm Drag. She panders to the crowd a bit and Cage pulls himself to his feet. Cage stalks behind her. She turns around and he hurls her up and over the ropes.
Matthew Werner:[/color] NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!
She skins the cat though, unbeknownst to Cage. She gets back into the ring and gets behind Cage and dumps him up and over the ropes and to the floor below.
Matthew Werner:[/color] YEEEESSSSSS! YEEEESSSSSS! YEEEEEEEEEEESSSSSSSSS!
Matthew Werner:[/color] You ok there, Matt?
Matthew Werner:[/color] Ahem. Yes. I apologize.
Ding! Ding! Ding!
Keri Thames:[/color] Here is your winner, Valorie Evans!
Valorie sits on her knees and claps her hands, the fans and Matt Steel applauding joining her. Her victory is short lived though, as “Smells Like Teen Spirit” by Nirvana plays as McCarthy comes out from the back and, no nonsense, makes his way to the ring.
Keri Thames:[/color] The following match is scheduled for one fall and it is a triple threat match for the WFWF National Championship! First, in the ring, she is Valorie Evans! Second, on his way to the ring, he is Luke McCarthy!
McCarthy climbs the steps and gets into the ring and ascends the turnbuckle, with pyro going off over on the stage.
Matthew Werner:[/color] Delayed reaction much?
Matthew Werner:[/color] Well...that's what his entrance says anyways.
Matthew Werner:[/color] Whoops.
McCarthy starts yelling at Evans, calling her a bunch of names not suitable for the censors.
Matthew Werner:[/color] What the is he ing saying to her?
Matthew Werner:[/color] I have no clue what the he is ing saying to her. It's the ing censors man.
Matthew Werner:[/color] The ing man ing holding us ing down man. ing dispicable.
Matthew Werner:[/color] ing agreed.
[/endtourettesoutburst]
“Here Comes the Boom” by P.O.D. echoes through the arena as the WFWF National Champion makes his way out from behind the curtain.
Keri Thames:[/color] And finally, he is the WFWF National Champion. He is Jon O'Deeves!
O'Deeves makes his way to the ring and gives the title to the ref after he kisses it. Valorie gets to her feet and each participant stands in their respective corner as the ref calls for the bell.
Ding! Ding! Ding!
The two men look at each other and then at Evans, who is still looking out at the crowd. They charge at her and she ducks out of the way. They both turn around and she jumps up for a split kick, sending McCarthy over the ropes and leaving O'Deeves up and staggering. He sort of stumbles off of the ropes and she wraps her legs around his neck and twists her body around his arm, thus strangling him with the Christo. McCarthy rolls into the ring to try to break the hold, but it's too late. O'Deeves's tapped.
Ding! Ding! Ding!
Keri Thames:[/color] Here is your winner and the new WFWF National Champion...VALORIE EVANS!
Matthew Werner:[/color] WOOO!
Luke McCarthy smacks the mat in anger as the ref raises Evans hand in victory. He gives her the title and she kisses the main plate of the title and falls to her knees, holding the title tight.
Matthew Werner:[/color] Big win for Valorie Evans, for sure.
At that point, Matt Steel walks up to the announce booth.[/color]
Matt Steel:[/color] Sorry, I wanted to make sure I locked my car.
Matthew Werner:[/color] Wait ... but if you're here ... who did I just do commentary with ... ?
They both look at the camera.[/color][/center]