scars and stripes the age of fear is upon us

Thanks for the welcome rev. I did read over some and I know I probably didn't separate it right but I just didn't want to offend anyone or anything. Just was trying to do something different I guess.

You know what, I actually liked this. I am curious as to why you picked out Ace out of everyone in this entire place, but you know, not bad.

The grammar here was atrocious. I cannot even sugar coat that. When you write RPs, write them in Word, where you have spell check. If you do not have word, then at least write them on here and use WFs spell check feature. It will go a long way in making this look a ton better right out of the gate.

You clearly understand the promo aspect, and I imagine that comes from your being a fan of wrestling. Good start. What I would like to know (like when you asked me exactly what we looked for in RPs) was more background on Dixon. Introduce us to him, his life, all of that. Hell, just have him taking a walk outside the arena and just talking his history would have been good. Just, needed something.

I completely agree with everyone else that you should check out the S&S RPs as they go up. These are arguably the best pieces our guys can write, because we are all fighting for a title match, something only maybe 5-6 people will get in the following year cycle. It is a big deal so everyone wants it.

You do that, you will understand what I mean about telling a story. You are brand new to RPing as a whole, so I was not expecting much. You showed, which is more than most new guys do so that is awesome. You follow our advice and if you actually stick around though, you could become really good and have some fun here.

Very nice to see a new person around as always. However, I must ask why Ace? Just curious I suppose, haha. Also, to add on to your comment about typing this from your phone; if you have any way to type something out on the computer rather than your phone, you should definitely do that. If not, I'd consider learning some of the basic coding of the board (bolding, italics, colors, etc.) to make your RPs look a little nicer. The way you have it now, it kind just looks like a block of regular text.

Also, another tip to build off of everyone else. I'd definitely consider writing these in more than one sitting. Length isn't the most important thing, but you're definitely going to want to write more than a few sentences.

That and pretty much what everyone else has said with an emphasis on reading some other guy's stuff. That will help you get a better idea of the style that is typical around here. Good luck and hope to see you stick around!