Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Dec 2, 2013 23:32:20 GMT -5
I have a rule, if Im taking you out (to dinner or wherever) and you get on your cell phone and start texting your friends...You're payin for your meal and Im taking mine to go. Luckily its only happened twice. I don't see how a woman could think that it isn't a signal for 'I'm not interested in you' to be on their phone while on a date. I'm with you. If you're a couple & it's someone who they need to have a quick conversation with that can't wait, it's understandable. If you're not a couple & it happens, why would the other person think there was any chance of a future?
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Post by BrIaNMeRcY on Dec 3, 2013 1:12:55 GMT -5
I have a rule, if Im taking you out (to dinner or wherever) and you get on your cell phone and start texting your friends...You're payin for your meal and Im taking mine to go. Luckily its only happened twice. If this happened to me, I'll take away her phone and throw it on to the subway tracks. She can either leave it of become a darwin award winner. The phone isn't going anywhere. Why bother keep on checking your stuff? If something important happened, it can wait. I mean, damn, I have never been on a date. At times, it feels like I am just meant to be single. Speaking of women, I remember this woman in high school. Suffice to say, with all the makeup she applied everyday, she looked like a clown. Seriously, a clown. As I grew older, I'm glad I didn't waste my time with her. I'm glad my former school mates doesn't even attempt to look for me. Let alone any of my former female classmates. Thanks for social media, their true colors came out and it turned out that their indeed 100% fake. These days, I have severe trust issues. When I want to be left alone, just let me be. Honestly, I wished men & women gave their reasons why they reject somebody out of a relationship. If I am put into a position where I know I'll be in the "friend zone," I'll just delete her number off of my phone and never talk to her again. In this ever so tech savvy, mobile world, relationships can be a total sham. What happened to the days when men and women just dated based on their personality and whatnot? Its sad it was probably easier to date in the not-so technologically advanced 1950's. Social media is taking away a stigma that is so important to a given relationship. In this day and age and the way women are, I guess I'll be a bitter single for years to come.
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That 80s Guy
Main Eventer
Gnarly!
Joined on: Nov 6, 2010 14:29:43 GMT -5
Posts: 1,546
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Post by That 80s Guy on Dec 3, 2013 2:55:23 GMT -5
-- Looks have a TON to do with it, in the eyes of a girl. I was actually looking up something interesting, last week in a search engine: what kind of body types do girls prefer... I came across an actual question of this, made about 7yrs ago on Yahoo! Answers and the most common response was: Skinny But Toned. I don't like to think girls are that shallow, but speaking from personal experience of being shot down time and time again... As a pretty decent guy who grew up with good morals, I happen to have a "stocky" build (not skinny, not fat, not muscular, just bigger than the average guy) and I really do believe that's what a lot of girls do NOT want in a guy - they want the underwear model type with cut abs...
And it could just be in my part of the country, but I think race has a lot to do with a girl's decision on whether to accept a date from a guy or not. Most girls will say they're not racist, and out-goingly, they probably aren't. However, internally, I also believe they dictate if a guy isn't of their race, they'll keep'em in the "friend zone", sorta speak, without any possibility of advancement. Take for example, several years back, I reconnected with an old classmate of mine on FB and I lost track at how many times I've offered to take her out, whether it was to just hang at a bar or out to grab a bite - she wouldn't accept. I even won tickets to UFC 129 from TapouT and asked her to go to Toronto with me, so she can see her favorite fighter GSP in action, and she STILL didn't accept! Fast forward, I recently found out she had eloped and I got a look at the guy and it was some guy who looked like he could be related to her... to me, it didn't take an Einstein theory to figure out she probably rejected all of my invites, because I'm mostly native, have the dark features, and have the stocky build (that most girls aren't into anyways).
So whenever a girl says "looks don't matter" - I have yet to come across one who's honest enough to admit that they really do!
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Post by BrIaNMeRcY on Dec 3, 2013 11:01:06 GMT -5
That 80s Guy, I am a sucker for reading the personal experiences of others. I am one of those types of guys who refuses to be "friends" with a woman who would put me in the "friend zone." Just when I got rejected, I said to myself, I shouldn't be wasting my time on a jaded, unintelligent, woman. I sent her a blunt and honest text and I have not seen or spoken to her again. If her and I cross paths again, I'll just walk by like she doesn't matter to me and the world. I know she is living with deep regret and wishes she could have done something different. Afterwords, I cleaned my hands, shaved my head bald, and washed away any remaining BS that was attached to my body. Since April of 2012, I have lost my complete faith and trust in women. Two things I feel I won't ever get back.
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Revvie®
Main Eventer
Somewhere between Reality, and the Absurd
Joined on: Jun 29, 2005 1:04:26 GMT -5
Posts: 4,327
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Post by Revvie® on Dec 3, 2013 11:20:24 GMT -5
My simple opinion is dating is no harder, or easier. Media distraction has been there for years, and is choice for everyone; it has evolved but I don't feel like it has affected dating negatively entirely. Consider a number of people ( I will try to find the study later) that have been connected due to the use of the internet, cell phones, etc. Have also found relationships that are based on more than simple bar room convo, or odd pick up lines in publicly, and then trying to toil about the rest of them after.
Dating is evolving, but it isn't any better or any worse. We, just like to view the past as some better point in time for things (also in another study that I will try to find later).
Diff. Generation...same complaints.
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Deleted
Joined on: Sept 29, 2024 2:30:33 GMT -5
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Post by Deleted on Dec 3, 2013 12:24:13 GMT -5
That 80s Guy I don't know the whole story but it sounds like she may have had something going on with that other guy on the side more so than her rejecting you due to race. Overall though, I feel social media is a double edged sword in regards to dating. It provides more opportunities for communication but at the sametime can add unnecessary stress to a relationship. I'm not big on social media at all but I had a girlfriend who used to get so worked up that I never used Facebook or was in a "relationship" on it. People put too much stock in what the internet has to say, I don't need a website to tell me if we're together or not.
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Post by T R W on Dec 3, 2013 13:08:11 GMT -5
It isn't any harder than it used to be. I would say that in many ways, meeting someone with similar interests is much easier. While social media and texting has made some parts of relationships more complicated, it hasn't changed the core of it. A lot of you are in or fresh out of high school, which is either the worst or best time for dating, depending on the individual, but not usually much in the middle. You'll also find that dating women is a lot different than dating girls.
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Post by ICW on Dec 3, 2013 13:21:11 GMT -5
I'm pretty iffy on this one. My girlfriend and I have been dating for nearly 8 months and we met at a house of a mutual friend right after a night out at the bar. That night we talked briefly to each other but I didn't think she was interested in me. About a week later, I received a friend request from her on Facebook. We then had a little lunch date and the rest is history.
Before her, however, I found it incredibly difficult to date in college. I found it tiresome that girls would constantly say "I just want a really good, caring guy that won't treat me like crap" and then that guy presents himself to her and she "just wants to be friends" because he's not exactly what she's looking for in a guy physically.
Guys and girls are both shallow, no question about it.
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Post by BrIaNMeRcY on Dec 3, 2013 17:15:10 GMT -5
It isn't any harder than it used to be. I would say that in many ways, meeting someone with similar interests is much easier. While social media and texting has made some parts of relationships more complicated, it hasn't changed the core of it. A lot of you are in or fresh out of high school, which is either the worst or best time for dating, depending on the individual, but not usually much in the middle. You'll also find that dating women is a lot different than dating girls. If you and I were having this conversation in 2007, I would have been fresh out of high school. Now that it has been almost seven years removed since 2007, I am far from being fresh out of high school. I completely agree with your last statement. At the same token, both girls and women can be complicated. As are boys and men are concerned. I have been told to go to malls, bars/pubs, and give online dating a shot. I have seen some online dating profiles and gosh, most of those women expect way too much from a guy. I have such a disdain for online dating based on the "fake" profiles and women looking for too much in a guy. As it pertains to any relationship, its not about how a guy looks or act. Its all about the bond and chemistry the two have in any given relationship. I know I am more of an observer when it comes relationship. I have grown so used to being singe and being in a relationship would be totally outside of my comfort zone.
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Deleted
Joined on: Sept 29, 2024 2:30:33 GMT -5
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Post by Deleted on Dec 3, 2013 20:37:52 GMT -5
I'm pretty iffy on this one. My girlfriend and I have been dating for nearly 8 months and we met at a house of a mutual friend right after a night out at the bar. That night we talked briefly to each other but I didn't think she was interested in me. About a week later, I received a friend request from her on Facebook. We then had a little lunch date and the rest is history. This is definitely one of the better aspects of social media in terms of relationship development. It may sound dumb but a friend request can lead to a wall post to a message to making plans and so on. So I do believe Facebook, particularly, is a suitable medium to just open up communication with someone you may not necessarily see all that often.
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jason1980s
Main Eventer
Joined on: Sept 30, 2009 14:58:56 GMT -5
Posts: 2,333
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Post by jason1980s on Dec 3, 2013 20:43:33 GMT -5
I have a rule, if Im taking you out (to dinner or wherever) and you get on your cell phone and start texting your friends...You're payin for your meal and Im taking mine to go. Luckily its only happened twice. wow, I like this idea!
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Post by BrIaNMeRcY on Dec 5, 2013 1:01:53 GMT -5
I'm pretty iffy on this one. My girlfriend and I have been dating for nearly 8 months and we met at a house of a mutual friend right after a night out at the bar. That night we talked briefly to each other but I didn't think she was interested in me. About a week later, I received a friend request from her on Facebook. We then had a little lunch date and the rest is history. This is definitely one of the better aspects of social media in terms of relationship development. It may sound dumb but a friend request can lead to a wall post to a message to making plans and so on. So I do believe Facebook, particularly, is a suitable medium to just open up communication with someone you may not necessarily see all that often. You do make a valid point there. Social media can have its fair share of benefits. Granted, I don't know too many people who met their significant others via social media. When I did have my Facebook page, all the women I had on there were just acquaintances of mine. They did not view me as being one of those boyfriend types. I have no real bond with any woman I met in the past. Hell, when I was in a a short lived relationship, I have virtually nothing in common with my ex. The chemistry just wasn't there. I gave her a chance and the rest is history. Currently, after being rejected once, I think its better for me to remain single. In the last seven years, I have completely forgotten how it feels to be in a relationship. One can only hope my Irish woman of my dreams is out there somewhere...
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mrassbillygunn
Main Eventer
WF 10+ Year Member
Joined on: Jul 23, 2011 19:35:48 GMT -5
Posts: 4,293
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Post by mrassbillygunn on Dec 5, 2013 2:06:18 GMT -5
I have absolutely zero desire for dating or human companionship for that matter which i dont knows healthy. I have my hobbies to keep me busy and a dog that i walk for company. Perfectly happy so i guess thats all that matters. I only want girls for sex, after that i stop answering calls and dispose of them like garbage as they have no other use for me.
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Deleted
Joined on: Sept 29, 2024 2:30:34 GMT -5
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Post by Deleted on Dec 8, 2013 17:59:18 GMT -5
Yes, when you bring a woman home to a large wrestling/ninja turtle figure collection it can be a little hard.
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Post by attitudesback on Dec 8, 2013 18:13:59 GMT -5
Let's say you liked a girl for 2+ years and she knew 2 years ago. The interest seemingly dies out until recently when a friend lets it slip you still like her. Because it's been brought to the front of your mind you finally tell her exactly how you feel, and she says (via text) she'd rather be friends. But you later find out she didn't write that text, she got a friend to do it whilst apparently laughing about it and seeing it as a little bit of a joke. Would you trash the girl and forget about her, or try and talk to her about why she treated you in that way? I didn't want to make a new thread and because some of this is internet based, I think it kind of fits in here.
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