Wrestling Memories: Survivor Series 1994

You’re not but I’m a bit of an attention hound sometimes,

WWE Survivor Series 1994




The Teamsters(Diesel, Shawn Michaels, Jeff Jarrett, Owen Hart, Jim Neidhart) vs. The Bad Guys(Razor Ramon, 123 Kid, British Bulldog, Sionne, Fatu)- So obliviously just about every match will be a elimination tag match so need to write it out. The irony in a team of wrestlers being called the Teamsters is one thing it’s even worse that it’s the heel team. Louder Vince I can’t hear you over the implications.

Technically speaking there’s not much wrong with the action, despite a few hiccups, but the way the match is laid out is strange. It follows the pattern of stall-sequence-small-sequence for most of the match and the match doesn’t get into second gear until its time for the finish. Diesel finally tags in after sitting the whole match out and in rapid succession eliminates Kid, Sionne, Fatu, and Bulldog. Continuing tensions between HBK and Big Sexy boil over and Razor scores a couple of near falls but is still no match for Diesel. It all goes tits up for the Teamsters going into the finish with HBK nailing Diesel with an errant Sweet Chin Music (the third time it’s happened according to Vince). After HBShizzle gives out to Nash he snaps and goes after Shawn. His team follows trying to retain order and all five ended up getting counted out. Meh match, meh finish, felt like there was something better here given the talent.

The Royal Family(Jerry Lawler, Queasy, Sleazy, Cheesy) vs. Clowns R’ Us(Doink, Dink, Pink, Wink)- The titantron labels them as Clowns Are Us. In a moment of Vince being Vince, he actually says with no hint of sarcasm that all little people look a like. As for this match, I’m pretty sure it’s held as one of the worst in the events history. I’m sure in the long run over the 25 or so years the events been around this is probably near the bottom but it’s not terrible. Obviously it’s a lot more comedic in tone but also given a pretty decent length (or so it felt). The comedy didn’t always hit and Dink actually proved to be not that bad of a worker. He wasn’t Mascarita Sagrada or anything but better then I was expecting. Filler but it’s accomplishes what it was advertised to be.

WWF Title Submission Match
Bob Backlund w/ Owen Hart vs. Bret Hart (c) w/ British Bulldog- Oh boy... unlike traditional Submission Matches this match can only end when either Owen or Davey Boy throw in the towel because that’s how Backlund dropped the belt to the Iron Sheik in ‘83, which is played on the tron as Backlund walks to the ring. Was this better then the rematch at WM 11? I don’t know it’s been 4 years since I’ve watched it (and you can’t make me watch it again) but this match is better just for a lack of Piper yelling into the mic for 20 minutes.

We’ve been through this. It’s a lot of mat work and holds and you know that’s not for me. I appreciate the skills but this wasn’t for me. Things only got worse towards the finish. I tend not to spoil finishes unless I review tournaments or it plays into a storyline later in the show (or the match just blows). But this, this needs to be addressed.

Owen manages to get Bulldog fired up and a chase ensues which leads to Bulldog running head first into the stairs, just as Backlund slaps on the Crossfacr Chickensing. With Bret refusing to quit and no signs of Davey Boy coming to, reality hits Owen hard, spoiler he stays heel after the match and it was a ruse to get Bret to lose, yay storytelling... it.

Owen begins to cry as Bret is in the hold and tries to revive Davey or plead with the ref. He eventually starts pleading with his parents sitting ringside...for 5 plus minutes. Yes the crowd that paid to get into this show watched Bret and Backlund roll around a Chickenwing for five actual ing minutes after at least twenty minutes or more of a match while a ing soap opera plays out at ringside. Jesus Christ, Owen finally convinces (more like forces) his parents to step in. Stu is reluctant but Helen gives in and finally, FINALLY throws the towel in. . This. Ending. Props to the crowd for staying hot for Bret Hart though...it wasn’t worth it. I’m actually ing annoyed. And props to Davey committing to the spot because he doesn’t move an inch, probably took a nap and crapI would’ve too. I’d come out it shades so I could doze off mid-match like Mr. Hughes.

Leave it to Junior to follow up an ending where I want to see a man drag his elderly mother over the guardrail with King Kong Bundy.

The Million Dollar Team (King Kong Bundy, Tatanka, Bam Bam Bigelow Jimmy Del Ray and Tom Prichard) w/ Ted Dibiase vs. Guts and Glory(Lex Luger, Mabel, Billy Gunn, Bart Gunn, Adam Bomb) w/ Oscar- Here’s a sentence you never thought you’d read and I never thought I’d type, a match involving Mabel and Bundy was better then one involving HBK. This match format is actually perfect for those two. They can come one, do their surf and go back out. Plus Mabel isn’t in the match for too long and towards the end Bigelow and Tatanka do a majority of the work. While nothing spectacular the action was consistent and simple, which works for a majority of the men involved in this match. It hit a lull going towards the final stretch and the finish was pretty anticlimactic but good match overall. Oh and if you’re wondering a USA broke out for “Made in America” Lex twice. Once against Bam Bam and the second against the Native ing American Tatanka. Damn Texans (no offense Ryan).

Casket Match
Yokozuna w/ Mr. Fuji and James E. Cornette vs. The Undertaker w/ Paul Bearer- This match has a special enforcer, Chuck Norris. A rematch from the Royal Rumble that same year. I might be in the minority here but I really enjoyed this. It’s simplistic and not overly technical but it doesn’t need to be. The two brawl throughout (as quickly as poor Yoko can) and the crowd is really hot for Taker. The heels provide some over the top moments and reactions but in a good way like Scooby Doo. There’s some well booked interference as well. It’s not a wrestling masterpiece but it’s an easy watch and hecking enjoyable. Sometimes overbooked brawls like this can be just as good as Hart/Perfect...ok maybe not that far but you get what I’m going for.



Overall: This was not a strong show. When a comedic midgets match that goes too long is among the best of the card there might be a few red flags. The opening match is good but disappointing given some of the talent involved. The mixed sizes match is goofy but has some fun moments and Undertaker/Yoko and Luger and Co. vs. The Million Dollar Corporation were both really enjoyable in my opinion. Then there’s Bret/Backlund but let’s keep this positive. Not a great show, not a terrible one, it was alright.