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Post by Swarm on Jul 2, 2022 17:58:06 GMT -5
We fade in from black to a hot Summer night in Baltimore, Maryland. The Chesapeake Employers Insurance Arena is dimly lit filled to... near... capacity? ... Let's call it an INTIMATE setting. The fans in attendance are buzzing. Not literally. Maybe some of them actually. There is a palpable vibe in the room; A room that smells recognizably of Old Bay seasoning. After several moments, the arena lights turn on prompting an enthusiastic response from the crowd! A few strategically angled crowd shots are seen before we cut to the hard camera angle where Alecia Matthews, Matthew Werner, and WFWF Legend Kurt Burton are standing in the ring. Matthews and Werner (boy that's gonna be fun to work with moving forward... maybe we should have brought Matt Steel back...) are standing front and center each holding microphones while Kurt Burton lumbers from ring side to ring side playing to the fans! An uninitiated viewer might think these folks got lost on the way to M&T Bank Stadium but people in Maryland actually just sort of dress this way. Alas, they are being riled up by Burton who is in turn feeding off of their energy! It's a feeding frenzy in Mobtown! I DON'T KNOW HOW WE'RE GONNA SETTLE THESE FOLKS! In his excitement Kurt Burton decides to TEAR HIS SHIRT OFF!! The crowd is aghast, and these people remember when Kyle Boller was the starting quarterback for the Ravens. Burton, as notorious for his inability to read a room as his love for Red Vines cups his hand to the ear for the crowd's approval! ... That about settled things down. That and the looming sleepiness from the amount of crab pretzels consumed this afternoon. Alas, Alecia Matthews reads the situation and begins her introductions.Alecia Matthews: Hello Baltimore! Yayyyy!Alecia Matthews: Thank you all so much for being here with us as well as everybody watching live at home! Matthew, this is quite the crowd isn't it? One of the tarps begins coming loose on the upper deck prompting the hard camera operator to pan downward a little.Matthew Werner: For sure, Alecia! I haven't seen this much energy in this town since Ray Lewis was acquitted for murder! The crowd kind of cheers but in that "yeah maybe he did kill those guys but the rings tho" kind of way.Alecia Matthews: ... Thanks... Matthew... Of course we do have some bad news for you guys tonight. Unfortunately, due to travel issues both the Daughters of Kaos and Reverend Shadow were unable to make it here tonight. Booooooo!Matthew Werner: It's true. The Daughters of Kaos' flight from Arizona was cancelled last minute and since Reverend Shadow is, from what we understand, from the sunken city R'lyeh deep beneath the South Pacific... Suffice it to say we're not entirely sure of the situation there but it could possibly involve the emergence of some sort of cosmic being emerging from the black depths of the Pacific which, if true, will most certainly be heading toward us to doom us all to a thousand years of unspeakable horror and darkness. I mean real talk that might be an improvement at this point. Suffice it to say I for one welcome our new dark overlord and would be... Oh hey, Kurt Burton just grabbed Werner's microphone!Kurt Burton: ENOUGH OF THIS DEPRESSING CRAP! HIT THE BRICKS MATTHEW WIENER! Matthew Werner: Kurt Burton: Turning to Alecia Matthews. YOU TOO! BYE ALECIA! Alecia Matthews: ... Sigh. The joke is Bye Felicia but... He fist pumps. Like he does that a lot anyway so maybe I don't need to point it out but... Anyway, Burton turns his attention to the crowd.Alecia Matthews: Ooohhhhhh kay.... With that, Alecia Matthews and Matthew Werner exit the ring leaving Kurt Burton to hold court for the fans attendance.Kurt Burton: YOU ALL EXCITED FOR TONIGHT'S SHOW?! Sure yeah I think it's gonna be...Kurt Burton: COME AWN BAY-BAY! ARE YOU GUYS EXCITED OR WHAT BALTIMORE!? Yeah you know what yeah! I...Kurt Burton: LET ME HEAR YAA SHOOUUUT CHARM CITY! YESS! LET'S DO THIS! AAARRRGGGHHH!Kurt Burton: J'YEAH! Breathing heavily... still... maybe he needs help... okay he's pulling it together. LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, WELCOME TO WFWF ASCENSION! And with that, the live shot fades to black as an image of the WFWF logo appears. After a few moments the opening synth to Ame Bibabi's.... hit.... song.... "Chin Up High" begins to swell!The drums kick in with a rolling fill matched by the WFWF logo strobing in alternation with the music video for the song. The beat kicks in and we see the Dutch dynamo herself! The baddest mamacita in Haarlem wastes no time busting out her sick rhymes as we get an assortment of shots of what appears to be just some person's apartment complex.With my chin up high f*** 'em all, f*** 'em by You think I'm ugly? I don't care You think I'm dumb? I don't care You think I'm scum? I don't care B****, I make my moneyAs she drops the hook to this absolute banger clips of the WFWF begin to alternate with clips from the video.P-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-party 'til I die With my chin up high F*** 'em all, f*** 'em by T-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-twerk Like it's my last day on this earth Let that dollar make her work, workWe cut to a quick succession of clips of many of the WFWF's contemporary stars. Trace Demon. Shuggy. WFWF Vanguard Champion Johnny Mason. WFWF World Heavyweight Champion Josh Dean. These images are followed by Ame twerking like last it's her last day on this earth. POISON delivering the POISON Bomb to a prone Chris Priceless. Reverend Shadow planting an opponent with his patented Implant DDT the Alpha with a hastily applied red X over the footage. Still more twerking. People always hate me But the more they hate, the more I work Everybody say they're lit, but all they do is showing sh** In my street, like they're slaves, b****es always kiss my feet Stay out of my way, you b****, I can't deal with your fake-ass meatDAVID HANDLECATCH! losing to some of the biggest stars in WFWF history; A look in their eyes revealing the extent of their relief for narrowing avoiding his devastating KIMURA! Ame continues showing the extent of her gangsta lifestyle assuredly involving dealing with many, many haters. They thought that I had stopped, it was over, I had dropped B****, I had my plans out here, I'm only just at my start You will have to kill me to make me f***ing stop I was already dead again, you can't hurt me, only God"The Princess of Wrestling" Scarlett Quinn appears, similarly obscured by a giant red X, delivering her flying Super Kick the Drive-By Kiss. We then cut to footage of a man in a spacesuit bopping around on the moon; One assumes due to the lack of available footage of the Undisputed Crab Nebula Interstellar Champion TITUS! This is followed by Ame Bibabi firing what appears to be some sort of confetti gun. P-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-party 'til I die With my chin up high F*** 'em all, f*** 'em by T-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-twerk Like it's my last day on this earth Let that dollar make her work, work P-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-party 'til I die With my chin up high F*** 'em all, f*** 'em by T-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-twerk Like it's my last day on this earth Let that dollar make her work, workWe see WFWF fan favorite M̷͇͙̱̏͜͝ͅ3̵̈̐͘̚͜͝S̵̡̝̺̖̑H̸͙̊͋̂ delivering her front flip piledriver the Raze followed by a clip of Penny Shannon landing the Liberty Cap; As you would expect covered by a large red X. Cut back to Ame doing that bouncy little elbow dance she does. I ain't scared of death, but I fear them is dead as breath All the drugs in your face, I am blessed with the smartest brain I remember your laugh when I was at my worst Let me tell you, piece of scum, I'm supported from above Your man in my DM's, while you talking sh** behind my back All the sh** you said made you look like a little b**** like that Your opinion, b****, f*** that, what do I think of you? How I laugh in your face? B****, if you only knew Ha-ha-ha, ha-ha-ha, ha, ha-ha-haCut to an assortment of clips of Alex Sean, predominantly from his last run in the XWA. Sean Lariats a concerningly overweight Derrick Jedi. Anybody check to see if that dude's okay lately? Anyway, this is followed by more clips concluding with Sean choking Trace Demon out with his Anaconda Choke the Quoth the Ravens. This image begins to alternate with Ame Bibabi as she ha-ha-ha's in the faces of her foes. P-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-party 'til I die With my chin up high F*** 'em all, f*** 'em by T-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-twerk Like it's my last day on this earth Let that dollar make her work, work Sh-sh-sh-sh-sh-sh-sh-sh-shake that moneymaker In my face, it's a favour Ooh, I love your misbehaviourAme repeats this final triplet of p's, t's, and sh's. The song begins to fade out as we see an image of EBR standing front and center from the WFWF Ascension Tour 2022 Press Conference. Cut back to Ame as she appears to be phasing out of reality then bounces some more as cartoon money rains from the sky. As the song finishes fading out we cut back live to the Chesapeake Employers Insurance Arena where Ame Bibabi's anthem in honor of twerking switches to "Groundbreaker" by Mohamed Ragab blasting through the speakers and causing a surge within the crowd as the minimalist beat builds to that bass drop.... There it is.Alecia Matthews: Gentlemen our first match here tonight at the fourth vicennial Ascension is to determine the new No. 1 Contender for the Vanguard Championship. Johnny Mason, if our viewers recall left SuperBrawl XI without his advocate or his championship belt so you can bet that he’s paying very close attention to this match! Kurt Burton: OH YOU BET YOUR BOTTOM DOLLAR HE IS! J'YEAH! One can only assume he fist pumped. WHAT A DECISION TO START THIS SHOW OFF WITH THIS MATCH! Matthew Werner: Well as of now there are only two matches officially scheduled so... Kurt Burton: CRAM IT, MATTHEW WIENER! Matthew Werner: Sigh. ... So that's just... gonna be a thing now isn't it.... The stage is illuminated with rainbow lights followed by a strobe light of flashing, white lights that mimic the beat of the song. The audience claps in an attempt at rhythm harmony however both their lack of rhythm along with their meaty forearms smacking against another off-time with the beat... Look they're trying their best. Still, this electronic, upbeat, pulsating music that oozes energy could only mean one person. Once that wah-wah and distortion of the bass pounds the speakers, from the behind the curtain, she makes her appearance and the crowd goes wiiiillllldddd! Daehyun Moon: The following contest is scheduled for one fall! Introducing first! From Los Angeles, Californiaaaaahhhh..... MmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmESHhhhhhhh! The Mesh from old is back! From the ashes of what occurred to her at SuperBrawl, she emerges, dancing to the beat of her new entrance music. The kandi bracelets are back. Atop her now platinum hair are bunny ears. The tutu is back, only now there is a small blue bunny tail behind it. The furry boots are back.Alecia Matthews: Good to see the year of inactivity did wonders for Mesh! She looks more like herself than the last time we saw her. Kurt Burton: So this is the world famous Mesh I keep hearing about? Looking forward to see if she’s still able to ROCK AND ROLL BAY-BAY! She dances her way down the entrance ramp, high-fiving and hugging her loyal members of The Good Vibe Tribe who have waited over a year to see her back to her former self. One fan in particular, a young girl is seen crying in the shoulders of her mother as Mesh pats her on the head, giving the young fan one of her kandi bracelets. Mesh climbs inside the ring and stands on top of the turnbuckle, taking in the overwhelming response from the fans. She smiles and blows kisses to all of them.Matthew Werner: She certainly appears to be in good spirits however one does have to wonder, once that bell rings, whether she truly has recovered from the damage she endured prior to the WFWF's hiatus. "Stairway to Heaven" then begins to play through the speakers of the arena. Mesh’s expression, while perched on the turnbuckle, changes. POISON makes his way through the curtain, holding a chair that has "ASCEND" spraypainted on it.Daehyun Moon: And her opponent! Weighing in at two hundred and nine pounds... POISONnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn! Alecia Matthews: POISON, as I'm sure you can fill us in on Matthew, was having quite the run of success prior to the... as you put it... hiatus. The ghost of air quotes hang thick in the air.Matthew Werner: Uh... Well... Sound of papers shuffling. ... As we know... He is... Alecia Matthews: ... He debuted at Survival of the Fittest 2020... Matthew Werner: Yes! And uh... give me just one moment here...Alecia Matthews: ... Of course it took two men to eliminate him from that. He also had just gotten an impressive victory over Chris Priceless at The Coming. Matthew Werner: Uh... Yes. And you know, what's clear is... um... POISON is a rising star. This new WFWF... well.. it's a hotbed for competition and... ambition. It's time for these guys and gals to be doing what they've been doing and that time... is... now. Kurt Burton: Beautiful, Matthew! Matthew Werner: Modestly. Thank you, Kurt. Alecia Matthews:  ... Yeah... Thanks, Matthew... POISON walks to the ring not acknowledging any of the fans asking for a high five. POISON slides the chair into the ring, and hops onto the apron. POISON slings himself onto the ring and rolls out to his feet. The piercing eyes of POISON follow Mesh around the ring. Like a shark, his eyes remain fixated on his opponent. The music fades to silence then, at long last, the first match of the new WFWF is underway as the bell rings thrice! The two combatants circle the ring, waiting for the right opportunity to make the first move. The Baltimore crowd is feverishly roaring for Mesh as they chant her name, louder and louder each time.Alecia Matthews: I’ve heard these crowds go absolutely NUTS for Mesh many times before, but you never get used to that reaction! Kurt Burton: What was that? I CAN'T HEAR YOU! AH-HA! Alecia Matthews: I said you never get... Kurt Burton: No I was... doing a thing... Alecia Matthews: Oh right, sorry. The crowd reaction seems to be energizing Mesh as she shakes his fists with each pass around POISON whose sight remains glued on his opponent. After much anticipation, they lock up. POISON towers over Mesh but her fight and resilience are much bigger as she tries to gain the advantage early on in the match. It appears like Mesh is going to strike first but suddenly, POISON twists his body to the left and causes Mesh to fall onto her feet, followed by a loud roar! His eyes widening and veins bulging on the side of his neck. She looks on, startled.Matthew Werner: A lot of intensity shown by POISON here. Alecia Matthews: You speak to the guys in the mail room? He's an interesting guy... Let's leave it at that. Mesh lifts herself off the mat and circles around the ring again, creating some distance between them until they lock-up again. With such ease, POISON is able to toss Mesh aside again!Matthew Werner: The ring rust is definitely showing here. Mesh better be careful to not make a mistake. Alecia Matthews: POISON is not a gimme match for her. Mesh is certainly the odds-on favorite... Kurt Burton: Yeah I got a few hundred bucks on her. Alecia Matthews: I'm pretty sure in your position that is illegal or, at very least, deeply unethical. Kurt Burton: Oh... I said... pucks... on her. Matthew Werner: You have a few... pucks... on her? Kurt Burton: YEAH BAY-BAY! I GOT PUCKS FOR DAYS ON THIS TUTU LADY! YOU DON'T KNOW NOTHIN' ABOUT NOTHIN'... WIENER! They lock up again and POISON tosses Mesh aside but this time, he approaches her in the corner! Mesh is too quick, and she avoids being hit by the 209-pound runaway train that is POISON. He’s not even fazed as he immediately follows up on the offense. With Mesh sprawled in the corner, POISON screams as he charges towards her with a running tomahawk chop! Okay yeah fair enough, we're gonna need a new name for that one. Mesh ducks and rolls in between the legs of POISON before drilling him with a leaping forearm – but POISON remains unfazed. Mesh looks on startled as her opponent slowly turns around to face her. POISON turns to grab her, but she ducks again and starts kicking at his legs, like an ax to a tree. Her speed is too much, and she manages to avoid POISON while chipping away at his legs, using her kicks to slowly do damage over time. "The New Plague" shoves Mesh but she follows up with another leaping forearm, drilling her opponent in the head. She follows up with a stiff-looking clubbing blow to the gut, keeping the offense consistent. Mesh goes for another forearm, but POISON grabs her arm. Mesh goes for another forearm, but POISON grabs that arm, completely trapping her. She tries kicking him but, in that position, they don’t register. POISON lets out another scream before headbutting her chest repeatedly!Matthew Werner: Well that's gonna definitely end up getting screenshotted... Werner feels the look from both Burton and Alecia. ... For... gifs... on Twitter... of course... Mesh clasps at her chest before being shoved into the ropes again for a clothesline but she manages to duck and brings her opponent down with a drop toe hold, which prompts the crowd to lose it Enraged, he goes after Mesh but is sent to the outside after she pulls down the top rope! The crowd goes banana! Before POISON can recover, Mesh is already bouncing off the ropes and slides under the bottom rope, sending POSION crashing into the announce table with a baseball slide.Kurt Burton: AHHH MY ANKLES! STUPID JERK-BRONIS! Rather than jump over the rope like she used to, Mesh exits the ring and stands on the apron. POISON recovers. Referee Erik Everhard begins the countdown. As he approaches her, she follows up with a running kick to the face! POISON doesn’t let up though and he instantly grabs her feet and sweeps her off the apron and in one, fluid motion he shoves her into the steel ring post, causing her shoulder to crash into the metal. POISON charges at her and delivers a big boot to her shoulder, crushing it against the steel. Mesh flails in pain!Kurt Burton: THIS GUY IS SICK! I LIKE IT! J'YEAH! Alecia Matthews: No doubt POISON has one heck of a mean streak. She rests against the barricades, creating more distance between her and her opponent but POISON is relentless. He runs towards her, his big hand extended behind him, going for another tomahawk chop to the bullseye that is her head but Mesh scurries away and he chops the barricade instead! Mesh charges towards POISON and hits a running dropkick right to the heart of "The New Plague"! The referee orders the two wrestlers to take the fight back inside the squared circle. Mesh heeds the orders from the official but POISON walks by the timekeeper’s area to grab his customized instrument of destruction. POISON lets out a blood-curdling scream that echo throughout the Chesapeake Employers Insurance Arena!Matthew Werner: Looks like POISON is wanting to do some serious damage here Glad to know we have an official like Erik Everhard who will maintain control of the ring! The referee tries to stop POISON but he knows better. He orders the monster to put the chair back but POISON walks past the referee and brings the chair with him onto the apron.Matthew Werner: Okay well... nevermind then. Suddenly, Mesh slides underneath POISON’s leg and pulls his legs off the apron, sending the monster headfirst against the ring apron – the hardest part of the squared circle. The count is restarted. POISON is quick to recuperate though and shoves Mesh back against the barricades. "The New Plague" grabs the chair again and opens it, sitting it in front of the commentary team.Kurt Burton: Looks like we’re getting the action live and direct...ly in front of us. That was a KRS-One reference, by the way! Alecia Matthews: I think more concerning is Erik Everhard's complete abdication of duty here! Matthew Werner: Ya know I wasn't gonna just straight up say it... Alecia Matthews: These are human beings! Matthew Werner: Certainly Mesh is! I mean we don't know, maybe POISON is some sort of... Island of Dr. Moreaux hybrid thing under there but... still... he's clearly mostly humanoid. And ya know even if he wasn't... that's okay. Because... hey... ya know... who cares, at the end of the day, right? Like so what if... Alecia Matthews: ... You were talking about the chair... how they're humans... allowing the weapon is bad... Matthew Werner: Ah yes, yes. Thank you. Yeah, I'm against it. Really and truly. POISON grabs Mesh and sits her on the chair. He then climbs onto the apron again.Alecia Matthews: In all seriousness, what is POISON doing?? He lets out another scream before leaping off the apron – and stops himself from hitting the chair as Mesh managed to scurry out of harm’s way! POISON goes for a lariat, but Mesh immediately hits him with a drop toehold onto the chair! It’s Mesh’s turn to climb onto the apron. The crowd is now in a frenzy! Mesh leaps off and the apron and – CRASH!Alecia Matthews: OH MY GOD! Mushroom Stomp through the chair! For the first time in this match, POISON is down. His arm lay sprawled away from him.Matthew Werner: Wow! Whattamaneuver! It's at this point we check in with Erik Everhard who, while doing absolutely nothing to prevent the flagrant use of a weapon, is at 15, the halfway mark before the count out!Kurt Burton: Mesh better get back in that ring BAY-BAY! With the crowd chanting her name, she grabs POISON’s mask to pick him up, but she struggles to pick up the fallen monster. She’s 122 pounds and POISON is 209 pounds. She manages to get his back against the apron and the referee is at 17! 18!Kurt Burton: FORGET THAT! GET BACK IN THAT RING AND TAKE THE COUNT OUT! AUGH! WHAT A JERK-BRONI! Matthew Werner: Is that like... ya know what... sure. 19! Using all her might, she gets POISON into the ring, breaking the count at 19.9 seconds which causes the crowd to pop! Not wasting any more time, Mesh covers POISON! One... Two.... Three! Just after the count reaches three POISON manages to kick out! Perhaps a few seconds longer to recover, he would have continued to fight on. Alas, the bell rings; Mesh is the number one contender to the WFWF Vanguard Championship!Daehyun Moon: Here is your winner...... MmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmESHhhhhhhh! Alecia Matthews: She did it! Mesh is the new No. 1 Contender for the Vanguard Cahmpiobnship! Mesh/Mason II is happening! The crowd comes unglued as Mesh’s arm is raised as the victor, conquering the monster in her first match since 2021. She can’t help but smile.Matthew Werner: This is a great moment for Mesh! To endure what she did, have this year-long hiatus, come back in the first match of the new WFWF and win impressively, I'm sure she's feeling great! Suddenly... Choir voices echo through the arena speakers following a barrage of drums.Oh, I'll never kill myself to save my soul I was gone, but how was I to know? I didn't come this far to sink so low I'm finally holding on to letting goKurt Burton: UH-OH! Business is about to pick up! I'll never kill myself to save my soul I'm finally holding on to letting go I'm finally holding on to letting gooooooooooooooo!!!The banging of the drums is metallic, causing an audible bang through the arena like shotgun blasts and the guitar rips through the speakers causing the arena to tremble until from the behind the curtain...Matthew Werner: He’s here! The Vanguard Champion is here in Maryland! Johnny Mason has made his presence known at Ascension, making his way down to the ring.Alecia Matthews: The last time we saw Johnny Mason was at SuperBrawl XI where not only was Mason betrayed by his former advocate, Tyson Watts but he also had his Vanguard Championship belt stolen. He didn’t exactly have the greatest night. Matthew Werner: The certainly begs the question... what exactly is he here to do tonight? Alecia Matthews: There’s been some... discourse over the validity of Mason’s reign as Vanguard Champion since many seem to cite as Mesh being the reason Mason even won the match against Anna Ahriman at Survival of the Fittest, so he definitely has a chip on his shoulder. Kurt Burton: YOU TWO JERK-BRONIS ARE... Pauses, having already called them jerk-bronis. ... DUMB! Mesh just had a battle with POISON. I bet Johnny Mason's coming to FINISH THE JOB! OH YEAH! As Mason enters the ring, he immediately approaches Mesh and the two former rivals engage in a heated staredown. The crowd ooh and ahh in anticipation! Mason and Mesh don’t say a word. They lock eyes and not one of them shows any signs of backing down. All of a sudden, Mason extends his hand out. The crowd can’t contain themselves; they start chanting “SHAKE HIS HAND!”Matthew Werner: Aw! That's really nice you guys! The sold-out Chesapeake Employers Insurance Arena cheer on this moment but... Mesh shakes her head from side to side frantically. She begins mouthing "no" over and over in quick succession. She is very clearly shaken by... something. Mason's look of stern focus contorts into confusion then into a degree of offense as Mesh scurries out of the ring and up to the ramp.Kurt Burton: WHAT!? HE DOESN'T ATTACK HER? SHE RUNS AWAY? WHAT IS GOING ON HERE!? Alecia Matthews: I don't think... This is very clearly not like her at all. Mason stares at the fleeing Mesh as she continues muttering "no" and "I can't" over and over, periodically looking back at the ring at Mason as one would if fearful of being pursued. She disappears behind the curtain and we cut back to the Vanguard Champion. We fade to black on the confused and slighted look across Johnny Mason's face.
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Post by Swarm on Jul 2, 2022 17:58:19 GMT -5
We return to the steady kick drum thump of "Linchpin" by Fear Factory, likely familiar to long-time fans as Alex Sean's primary theme song during his early career.The tempo of the beat is matched precisely with clips of a young Alex Sean during his days as Alex Showtime in the XWA and Sean eX in the WFWF sporting his iconic early look of short, slicked-back, platinum blonde hair. ... Look the leather pants were "in" at the time, I dunno what to tell you. Early 2000s and all... It'll come back, just wait, you'll see. Snicker from your palace of being with "it" for now, soon you shall see how tenuous your grasp of "it" is! Anyway.... after two instrumental measures the song's defiant vocals scream out!Can't take me apart! Can't take me apart...The song's first verse begins and just as well a collection of video highlights from this period in Sean's career, many of which are available in their full form at Alex's e-fed archive forum!See the light a new day has arrived for us Genesis of our evolution A linchpin holds within a means to and end Can't you see that we are one?We see a young Alex Showtime battling some of the XWA's most noteworthy stars; J.Pain, The Falcon, The Dark Vampire, even his tag team partner DGX. Apparently as a vampire? How spooky! We very quickly move post that and highlight a little of his time as Sean eX in the WFWF: Vote federation which since none of that period is archived whatsoever I can tell you it was brilliant stuff that most certainly would not age incredibly poorly if ever discovered.Can't take me apart! Can't take me apart! Can't take me apart! Can't take me apart! No you can't!We soon move to Sean's run in 2003; Unquestionably his breakout year. We see clips of Sean's matches in the Ring of Honor tournament against the likes of Killer Instinct 2 and Total Apocalypse. From there clips from his feuds with The Shape, Slayer, and Raider. Just as the chorus kicks in, his first WFWF Championship victory over Travis Hardison is showcased.We see no end to the dream We will never see the end We will never be the end All of my life I felt discarded Never feeling a part of itWe move to clips from his first feud with EBR where the WFWF Championships were unified to form the short-lived Undisputed Championship. This is followed by his upset loser-leaves town defeat at the hands of Warning. At this point the music transitions from the first chorus right to the breakdown (Which occurs at 2:20 in the video!).No you... No you can't take! No you can't take! No you can't take! No you can't take! No you can't take! No you can't take me apart!The video transitions to clips from Sean's return to the XWA in mid-2004. His brief feuds with Rose and Angelus from the period are showcased followed by his transition from villainous Alex Showtime to... mostly... also... villainous... Alex Sean!... ... Okay mostly it involved him getting a haircut. We enter into the final chorus of the song as Sean's transition from cocky, high flyer who also has the F-5 on his movelist for some reason to proto-MMA bad-ass but mostly based on early 2000s Bryan Danielson is shown.We will never see the end We will never be the end All my life I felt discarded Never feeling a part of itWe see clips from his battles with Tempest, The MadDog, and perhaps most notably his classic bout with Lion Merteuil. This XWA run is briefly interrupted by his one-night-only return to the WFWF defeating HellRaizer in a Last Man Standing match as well as his return months later in the main event Hell in a Cell at SuperBrawl III. Finally we transition to the XWA World Title tournament just prior to its initial closure featuring Sean's bouts with Luthor Castle and, in the finals, Calvin Lee.You can't change me! You can't change me! You can't change me!The epic battle between protege and teacher is highlighted but, on that night, Calvin Lee was the better competitor and claimed victory in what would come to be the final bout of the original XWA.You can't change me! You can't change me! You can't change me now!Despite the defiant call, it was clear then as it is in the video that in these early years he had come to change dramatically. With the benefit of hindset, we know he would soon change the entire game. As we begin to fade out on Sean shaking Calvin Lee's hand, based on the look in his eyes, one could comfortably infer those plans were already in motion.
We return to the live feed via the hard camera where Daehyun Moon is standing front and center. Behind and slightly to his left is WFWF President Bobby Abadi; His slender frame mostly obscured by the large... handsome... like... just so great... frame of Moon.Alecia Matthews: Well it looks like we're getting right to our major announcement scheduled for this evening. Kurt Burton: AW YEAH! LET'S SEE WHAT BOBBO HAS TO SAY! Daehyun Moon responds with a super cool head nod, likely to a signal from someone at ringside. You can just tell they felt really seen, ya know?Daehyun Moon: Ladies and gentlemennnnn.... Please welcome W-F-W-F President... Bobby! AH-BAHHHHHHHHHHH-DEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE! The Baltimore crowd applauds politely for the new President of the WFWF who graciously accepts the microphone from Daehyun Moon and the center of the ring.Bobby Abadi: Thank you! How'severybodydoingtonight!? Aaggghh?! Yeah!Bobby Abadi: Ladies and gentlemen... Tonight I am going to make a huge announcement that will be so big for the WFWF! I... "AHHHH AHHHH HEMMM!!!" Bobby Abadi looks up to the stage area looking theatrically, performatively confused as a fairly large, portly gentleman in a white toga has toddled onto the stage. He is a man of great girth, all jowl’s but autocratic in his poise.Kurt Burton: OH MY GOD! I CAN'T BELIEVE HE'S BACK! Alecia Matthews: ... You know who that is? Matthew Werner: Yeah, really? Kurt Burton: ... Oh um... I didn't... I was just trying to put it over is all... Alecia Matthews: Ah. Kurt Burton: ... Ya know... figured you guys would fill in the deets. Alecia Matthews: Right. He holds a large old timey looking stone tablet in his left hand and the live mic in the other. He sports an impressive pair of pipes too, he just cut Bobby Abadi off but good!Crier: Fine citizens of Baltimore, your attention please: I will now speak! The crowd sort of boos because rude on the cut off but doesn’t quite know what to make of this oddly dressed fellow.Crier: I speak on the behalf of a true legend of our beloved industry! A patriot! A man whose accomplishments and resume are rivaled by none! LONG LIVE the Sovereign of WFWF... DGX! Crier: SAVIOR... of our industry! With this proclamation the Crier for the Sovereign lowers his microphone and stands respectfully aside as a choir of male voices slowly rise in timbre softly backed by horns as stepping onto the stage is the man who purports to be the savior of the industry. He is dressed impeccably as always in a finely tailored suit, appropriately white and gold in color scheme radiating an aura of regality with just a hint of divinity. His hair is immaculately groomed and combed back, as adorning his head is a small golden wreath in the stylings of ancient Rome.Matthew Werner: I think it's official: Living in the sticks has officially made him weird. Kurt Burton: SPEAK FOR YOURSELF, WIENER! Matthew Werner: Muttering. Of course... Kurt Burton: LOOK, I DONT LIKE DGX! I'M NOT FRIENDS WITH DGX! Long pause.Alecia Matthews: .... but? Kurt Burton: What? That was it. Matthew Werner: Oh. Alecia Matthews: Yeah, seemed like there was going to be a third thing there. Kurt Burton: Oh... yeah... Apparently I do that sometimes, ya know there's one thing people always tell me. ? ? ?Kurt Burton: What? Alecia Matthews: Ohhkay then. DGX walks to the ring and takes in the fans, some cheering and some booing, always a mixed bag for him but he’s satisfied with the reaction. He walks up the stairs and briefly beckons over Abadi who, to be clear, has been performatively surprised... like... this entire time. After a short exchange of words Abadi's performance ceases as he kind of cocks his head to the side questioningly. Ultimately the Sovereign’s implacable gaze leaves no room for question. He just as quickly nods his head in understanding then gleefully moves toward the ropes taking a seat on the middle and stretching the top upward opening the way to the kingdom of the Sovereign in a gesture of genuflection.Matthew Werner: What a nice guy. Alecia Matthews: I know, right? DGX gracefully with all poise enters the ring, his wreath perfectly in place. He gives a warm nod, the type of which only a true lord could bestow, toward WFWF President Bobby Abadi who is just... delighted. Abadi follows behind as DGX walks to the middle of the ring and raises a single hand to the denizens of Baltimore in acknowledgment. The music is deftly cut off at this gesture!Bobby Abadi: DGX! Welcome back to WFWF! Abadi attempts to strike a tone of legitimate surprise but... yeah... suffice it to say the audience respectfully applauds. A knowing nod of acknowledgement from the Sovereign.Bobby Abadi: I was about to make an announcement but... what brings YOU out here NOOWWW!? It's clear Abadi intends to continue this God bless the guy. Ever unflappable but clearly ready to move forward with the proceedings, DGX kindly gestures for Abadi to afford him the floor.DGX: It is exciting times in the WFWF, Bobby! The relaunch has proceeded smoothly to this point and as a company, as an industry we have an opportunity to return to a time of prosperity not seen since the Aughts! Crowd pop and applause because who doesn’t like prosperity?DGX: These last years, this return to the business, it came under unhappy circumstances. Circumstances I’m pleased to say are now no longer an issue. However, while it is fully within my power now to leave, I feel compelled to stay. For you see, as I have surveyed the landscape both of this company and indeed this industry, I’ve seen disturbing and alarming trends. When I left this industry a decade ago, I was big on legacy. I felt that my body of work spoke for itself, very few people no matter their personal disdain would be so disrespectful as to not at least give a nod to my accomplishments as both valid and impressive. Ultimately, I’ve learned legacy is down to time and people. And after ten years, looking around at you all today... I find myself gravely disappointed. Crowd boos because who likes to be told they’re disappointing?DGX: I had thought my legacy would be enough to stand the test of time and in the most practical sense it is. Statistically there are few arguments that can unseat me as the Greatest of All Time. I’m like Tom Brady after Superbowl LI, the mic is kind of dropped on folks having a more impressive resume than mine. But that doesn’t stop allot of you from trying. And what would be the best way to combat this? I could get social media and fight with you all for hours on end pointlessly. I could return to my life post-wrestling and not care as I didn’t before my return. Both of these are easy options but not terribly effective. If there’s one thing that I’ve shown in my time it’s that I’m effective in most anything I do. So, the way forward was quite clear honestly. DGX pauses for dramatic effect which, based on how much Abadi is visibly reacting to everything he's saying... is substantial.DGX: I believe the rebirth of WFWF is a platform, an opportunity to put my legacy on display, dust off some old bits, add some new ones, really seal out the idea that I’m the best to ever do it. And on this relaunch tour, my path to immortality is clear. It starts in Washington, DC at He’ll Kick You Apart, He’ll Kick You Apart. It starts with Trace Demon... The crowd cheers because that’s intriguing as matches go.DGX: For those who are not buffs of my time in WFWF, short but impactful though it was Trace Demon holds an important and impressive distinction. Trace Demon was the man who defeated me for the WFWF championship and most importantly he is the only man to defeat me that I have not gotten a win back on in one-on-one action. Now true, I did take my pound of flesh aiding Alex Sean in his dethroning of and stripping the mystique of Trace Demon in XWA but I find in my latter years a desire for more direct and plain conflict resolution. Ironically Trace, this match takes place where it all began with you and I for the WFWF title. In Washington you visited this black mark on my legacy and in Washington I will erase it. You claim WFWF is your kingdom, and you put yourself on Mount Rushmore of wrestling. You may indeed be impressive Trace but that’s the fundamental difference between you and I, you acknowledge contemporaries but when it comes to legacy and achievement... I stand alone! Theme call back y ‘all!DGX: But Trace Demon is merely the beginning of this journey. For you see, after He’ll Kick You Apart, He’ll Kick You Apart the tour will continue and so too will my path to greatness. We’ve been told this tour will culminate in a most auspicious return! The return of Scars and Stripes. But in addition to that... DGX looks over at Bobby and nods graciously; Abadi giddy af. ... This event will also feature the return of one of the most career defining matches in the industry... The WFWF Rumble! The fans gasp! Matthew Werner: The WFWF Rumble!? Alecia Matthews: That is one of our most cherished novennial traditions! Matthew Werner: ... How do you know what all of these are called? Alecia Matthews: Look I don't make the schedule Matthew I just... Matthew Werner: No you're right... that's fair... Alecia Matthews: Yeah. DGX: Every member of the roster... man, woman, young, old, brave enough to enter will have their chance for a shot at the WFWF World Heavyweight Championship. DGX pauses to get his wind as the crowd pops because he’s laying down some exciting stuff folks are really looking forward to watching! Though he holds himself above them, he really IS a man of the people!DGX: Here tonight, in Baltimore before you the audience of our newly revived WFWF I gift you my proclamation! I, DGX, will be the FIRST MAN to declare for the Scars and Stripes battle royal! Crowd pops BIG because that’s some star power to that match baby!DGX: That, however, is NOT all I am here to announce. In the WFWF Rumble, after the rules are explained usually an unlucky person comes to the ring to stare tepidly at the arduous task before them. But I am the greatest of all time, as I said I stand alone near peerless in this industry! I do not fear challenge I relish it which is why your Sovereign will stand alone in the ring as the NUMBER ONE ENTRY in the WFWF Rumble. Crowd is actually really getting hot for this. The cheers are rapturous. They’re really hungry to see someone take this thing over! Even a small chant of "D-G-X! D-G-X! D-G-X! D-G-X! D-G-X!" breaking out!Alecia Matthews: I don't recall anybody ever CHOOSING to enter the WFWF Rumble at number one! Matthew? Matthew Werner: ... Oh um... I probably have it down somewhere... Alecia Matthews: You know what don't stress yourself... Huff.DGX nods his head along to the chants feeling it himself for the first time in awhile before he holds his hand aloft to hush the crowd.DGX: On that night, I will go the distance in the WFWF Rumble and just as I start the match alone in the ring I will END the match alone in the ring, victorious and WFWF Championship bound. There... on the biggest stage, in the biggest spotlight, in the biggest spot in the industry I will complete my magnum opus. I will defeat either Josh Dean or EBR or whomever is WFWF champion and when I stand victorious in the ring there will be no more dispute! There will be no dissent! All credibility will be STRIPPED of any who utter another wrestler’s name when they talk about the greatest of all time other than mine! Your Sovereign will stand by himself at the very peak, the pinnacle of the history of our great industry’s pantheon! I am inevitable! It was ordained when the stars were young that all will fall before the Sovereign! Scars and Stripes, I go the distance! I write my own ticket to the WFWF Championship and leave perhaps my most indelible mark of any mark I’ve left on any company! Crowd is super into it! People just like winners I’ve noticed. The male voices in choir rise their call to the heavens with the accompaniment of horns! DGX stares intensely at the crowd before his posture shifts to a neutral decorum and he again waves regally to the appreciative public of Baltimore, including Bobby Abadi who stands beside him applauding! As DGX's music plays over the speakers, we cut to the announce desk with Alecia Matthews, Matthew Werner, and Kurt Burton!Alecia Matthews: I'm actually a little speechless, guys! There's so much to unpack there. Matthew Werner: DGX is unquestionably one of the greatest of all time but clearly that small qualifier, one of, is not good enough for him. Frankly, knowing him as long as I have, this isn't surprising. Alecia Matthews: With that said, you have to wonder whether he has bitten off a little more than he can chew? First and foremost, Trace Demon is no stepping stone and nobody to overlook. He is one of the most decorated competitors in the history of the WFWF and, as DGX made sure to point out, defeated DGX for the WFWF Championship. Matthew Werner: That's true. Plus even IF he defeats Trace Demon, entering the WFWF Rumble at number one? That's a tall order for anyone but I will say this; However intelligent, however clever, however strategic you think DGX is? You're under-estimating him. I don't know how DGX plans to accomplish all of this but I do know if he has decided this is what he wants to achieve, he's got a plan for it and it isn't just "try really hard and hope to win". Alecia Matthews: That's a good point, I guess we'll just have to wait and see. Well anyway... Kurt Burton: HOLD ON! THERE'S ONE THING I DON'T GET! Alecia Matthews: Yeah? Kurt Burton: WHAT WAS BOBBY ABADI'S ANNOUNCEMENT GOING TO BE!? Alecia Matthews sighs a long... so very deep sigh.Alecia Matthews: Well... anyway... over the past...
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Post by Swarm on Jul 2, 2022 17:58:31 GMT -5
The iconic opening drum beat of "Scentless Apprentice" by Nirvana plays us in from commercial as we begin another video highlight video.Right along the drums we are treated to several brief clips showcasing the formation of the original incarnation of The Anointed; Destroyer, Slayer, Zero, Sean Houston, and of course, it's founder; Alex Showtime. This original incarnation was as destructive as it was short-lived. I mean literally like altogether I think it lasted a month or so? We did have this banner. Good times. As the main guitar riff of the song kicks into gear we transition to a few clips of the even shorter-lived, less memorable combination of Alex Sean, EBR, and The Shape which mostly involved them doing a "we're gonna fight but ohhh actually we're friends tho" fake out on the also short-lived Alex Sean talk show segment the Superiority Complex. A lot... of ideas back then... Anyway, we transition just as quickly to a series of clips from the 2004 incarnation, this time in the XWA featuring Alex Sean, EBR, and Frost. Ultimately, this is all prologue and context clues would indicate that as just as the lyrics finally kick in, we switch to the first truly impactful incarnation of The Anointed from 2006... Alex Sean, EBR, and Calvin Lee.I lie in the soil and fertilize mushrooms Leaking out gas fumes are made into perfumeIt was the best of times, it was the blorst of times. The Drakz/Kyzer administration was underway, Thunder had not yet started writing murder-mystery dinner theater RPs, The Anointed vowed to save the WFWF from it's fall to entropy. We had superhero themed pic-bases! I'm not even sure what that tag line even means but it's provocative! Anyway we see clips of Sean, EBR, and Calvin Lee wreaking serious havoc. Folks are attacked, Sean and EBR win the Tag Team Titles (of which they never lost), Calvin Lee wins the International Championship. We see their victories over WFWF legends such as Kurt Burton, Total Apocalypse, Master of Destruction, and Reverend Shadow.You can't fire me because I quit Throw me in the fire and I won't throw a fitFrom there the music skips to the final chorus and we transition to December 29th, 2008. Aaron Ashton and Johnny Michaels are attacked by the final and most iconic form of The Anointed... Alex Sean, EBR, and DGX. Calvin eventually came back too. He's our boy, ya know? Footage follows of The Anointed once again kicking ass and taking names, making their own rules, generally running roughshod across the entire WFWF. We see Alex Sean and DGX win the tag team titles (which they had already won and never lost) again (of which they then also never lost).Hey! Go away, go away!All of these clips build to May 9th 2009: BattleGround. We see quick cutting clips along with the escalating drum beat of the song coordinated with each participant. Thunder. Trace Demon. Saku. nerO. Yukio Blaze. Kurt Burton. Wayne McGurk. Reverend Shadow. And of course The Anointed themselves; Alex Sean, EBR, DGX, and Calvin Lee.Go away, go away! Go away, go away!Kurt Cobain's frantic screams reach a frenzied pitch and the action of the footage matches in kind with quick cuts of action from this incredible bout. Calvin Lee flies off the top rope with a Missile Dropkick connecting with the chest of Wayne McGurk. DGX nails Wayne McGurk with a swift Running Enziguri. EBR drops an unsuspecting Kurt Burton with a flying Shoulder Block square on the jaw. Alex Sean hooks Kurt Burton, elevates, then just as suddenly drops him head first to the canvas with a Brainbuster. The Anointed work in unison with DGX kicking Reverend Shadow from behind right in the pills leaving him prone to a combination Chop-Block from EBR and Left-Arm Lariat from Alex Sean. Calvin Lee levels Saku with a Steel Chair across the face! EBR obliterates Thunder with a devastating George Atkinson Lariat to the back of the head. Alex Sean hits Reverend Shadow with another Left-Arm Lariat sending both of them over the top rope to the floor. DGX nails Saku with a climactic Breakdown following up with the pin and securing the victory that night for The Anointed.Go away!As Cobain's fraying vocals fade and the guitars warp from feedback, The Anointed exit up the ramp; EBR worse-for-wear being carried by Alex Sean and Calvin Lee, and DGX pantomiming a belt shape around his waist. This would prove to be their final ride as a unit in the WFWF but regardless, on this night, The Anointed cemented themselves as likely the most formidable faction in WFWF history.
The previous video package ends and we return to the live broadcast and more specifically, the broadcast desk with our announce team.Alecia Matthews: Welcome back, everyone! We want to apologize about that... disturbance... in the feed. Frankly we're not entirely sure how that even happened. Matthew Werner: Yeah like are we broadcasting in UHF? What's the deal? Alecia Matthews: Nevertheless as I'm sure you've noticed we have been treated to some great highlight video packages so far involving your longtime associate Matthew; Alex Sean! Kurt Burton: Associate or meal ticket, amiright? Alecia Matthews: Got 'im! Matthews and Burton high five which, since Werner is positioned between them, involves them high fiving directly in front of his face.Alecia Matthews: Ah ha... ha... But Ahem. Back to the matter at hand, also featured substantially was another of Alex Sean's longtime... I mean... associates? Rivals? You name it, they've done it together. Kurt Burton: I always had my suspicions. Alecia Matthews: I didn't mean it that way, Kurt! She pauses, tilting her head and raising her eyebrows inquisitively. ... I mean now that you mention it... Matthews shakes her head. ... Anyway, EBR is also of course the number one contender to the WFWF World Heavyweight Champion Josh Dean and.... Suddenly the lights in the building drop save a lone spotlight facing the ceiling centered on a massive spaceship resembling the Starship Enterprise. As it begins to lower the opening section of "Mr. Roboto" by Styx plays.Alecia Matthews: Alecia Matthews audibly drops her format sheet on the desk. Ooohhhkay then... I guess this is as good a time as any to thank our first sponsor for the new WFWF... Dr. Starship! Matthew Werner: Yes, available at all local grocers... in the... Southeastern... United States. Alecia Matthews: Yes, while competitors may have upwards of twenty three flavors, Dr. Starship has actual stardust mixed in it so you can take a ride across the stars! Matthew Werner: Is that... you know... safe? Alecia Matthews: Well, until they settle their ongoing class-action lawsuit with the Boys and Girls Club of Florida... Yes? Kurt Burton: Wait a second, we can't even get a first class soda sponsorship, yet we can afford... Staring up at the lowering Spaceship. ... THAT!? Stopping just above the stage, the hatch opens with all the smoke and lights you see in cheesy 60's and 70's Sci Fi shows as a large man appears on the exit route of the ship's hatch.Domo arigato misuta Robotto!TITUS! WALKS! down the ramp onto the entrance ramp, as fans look to fist bump the behemoth.Matthew Werner: Would you all look at the size of this guy? Kurt Burton: I know the wardrobe can affect performance, Werner. He's got to be burning up in that space suit! As he climbs the ringside stairs, he steps over the top rope and into the ring. He raises his fist above his head as purple pyro shoots up from behind him.Kurt Burton: HE GETS PYRO!? Alecia Matthews: I think the more pressing question is what exactly is our... insterstellar traveler doing... here... right now? Matthew Werner: I suppose they must have already paid for the spaceship and all that... Kind of a waste not to use it. From inside the ring, TITUS! appears to be yelling in a frantic state however due to it being in a pitch inaudible to human ears his words come out as complete silence. Except for cats. They're picking up what he's throwing down. Matthew Werner: So are we just gonna... watch the guy in the spacesuit yell silently in the ring... or...? Alecia Matthews: Hold on... I'm getting word that... okay... someone... DAVID HANDLECATCH apparently... in the back knows someone who can hear his dialect and... he would like to be interviewed. Matthew Werner: DAVID HANDLECATCH! wants to be interviewed? Alecia Matthews: No, Matthew. DAVID HANDLECATCH! says that someone told him that TITUS! is telling us... that he, as in TITUS!, would like to be interviewed. Matthew Werner: Oh... Well Kurt, time to pop your interviewing cherry I guess! Alecia Matthews: Jesus Matthew. Kurt Burton: Yeah man. Alecia Matthews: What is wrong with you? Kurt Burton: Yuck! Matthew Werner: Sorry... I... That was uh... It's been a while since my sensitivity training. Alecia Matthews: And here I thought the perverted references left with Maxwell Dachs. Alas, the sound of a headset being laid down on the announce desk is heard as Kurt gets up from his position. TITUS! paces around, waiting for Kurt Burton.... and waiting.... and waiting... Kurt moving so very slowly lumbering his way up the stairs... Finally he enters the ring and approaches TITUS! who towers over the former International and Tag Team Champion.Kurt Burton: AALLRRIIGGGHHTT, I'm being joined at this time by TITUS! TITUS!: THAT'S TIHT-UHS!, EARTHLING! Kurt Burton: MY BAD, PAL! I'm being joined by, to my knowledge, the first intergalactic competitor in WFWF history, big TITUS! COM'AWN BAY-BAY! It's ok to laugh, pervs. Let these two fine citizens show you. Kurt Burton: So TITUS! Clearly you've got something on your mind, what's goin' AWN, BIG MAN!? I imagine you're disappointed that your scheduled opponent here tonight, Reverend Shadow, couldn't be here due to travel issues. TITUS!: TRAVEL ISSUES?! TITUS! chuckles, his high-pitched frequencies sending all manner of canine, feline, bovine... just a litany of "ines" into a mania. Some say his high pitched chuckles, if ever to reach peak smarminess, could cause a poor canine's head to explode! Eww, puppy brains!TITUS!: TRAVEL ISSUES ARE ANOTHER TERM FOR FEAR, KURT BURTON!! AS SOON AS REVEREND SHAADOOW SAW THE TRANSMISSION, he knew that it was inevitable. The pain that I would inflict WOULD CHANGE THE VERY FABRIC OF HIS BEING!!! Kurt Burton: I DOUBT THAT! Reverend Shadow is as about as.... TITUS!: COWARDLY AS YOU CAN FIND! AND I DID NOT COME ALL THIS WAY TO NOT DO BATTLE! So... Reverend Shadow and I will have our day. And he will find out why I AM THE MASTER!!! AND CONQUEROR!!! of the universe. TITUS! chuckles once again. It's an absolute calamity in animal shelters across these here United States.Kurt Burton: I don't know if you're in any position to compete, CHIEF! You might wanna take off that space suit. You're looking kinda flush and sweaty. TITUS!: THAT IS NOT SWEAT, YOU IGNORANT EARTHLING! THAT IS ADRENALINE! BEINGS FROM URANUS! Ok, these jokes will probably get old pretty fast.TITUS!: BEINGS FROM URANUS USE ADRENALINE AS PERSPIRATION! AND MY ADRENALINE IS SO MUCH THAT IT CAN NOT BE CONTAINED, because I was promised a battle. I DEMAND COMBAT! IF ANY MORTAL IN THIS ARENA HAS THE BALLS TO DO COMBAT, BRING THEM TO ME! But their balls will not be enough, for beings on my planet have EIGHT BALLS! Kurt Burton: Ok, that was waaayy too much information, big man. TITUS!: YOU EARTHLINGS NEED TO UNDERSTAND THAT YOU ARE DEALING WITH!!! Suddenly, TITUS!'S attention to a young, portly, neckbearded man sitting in the front row wearing a novelty, long-sleeve Star Trek the next generation shirt that is modeled to resemble Captain Picard's burgundy uniform. TITUS! clenches his teeth and chuckles before pointing at him.TITUS!: I'VE SEEN YOU! I KNOW YOU FEDERATION TYPES! I'VE SEEN THE DOCUMENT FILES! BRING HIM TO ME! The Star Trek fan is delighted, looking over to a nearby friend to soak in this opportunity of a lifetime! His scrawny friend lifts his replica championship title high in the air with one hand pointing to it with the other then pointing to his companion. Eventually, security escorts the Trekkie from his seat toward the ring.Matthew Werner: Somebody should probably make sure he signs the death waiver. Alecia Matthews: Wait, are supposed to have death waivers? Matthew Werner: Sighs. ... Well I guess I could always go back to college... The "lucky" fan steps into the ring with TITUS!, feeling pretty good about himself as he plays to the crowd. Kurt just shakes his head, for he knows what's about to happen, and, with a pat on the fan's shoulder, exits the ring clearing the way for...TITUS!: I KNOW IT WAS NOT YOUR CALL TO MAKE, EARTHLING! BUT YOU CAN THANK YOUR CAPTAIN FOR VIOLATING THE PRIME DIRECTIVE! Trekkie:  ... That... to happen.Matthew Werner: Gaht Dang! I think he just got sent to a galaxy far, far away amiright? Alecia Matthews: I could probably bust your chops on account on that being a Star Wars reference but yeah he might legitimately be astral projecting after that. TITUS! pulls his neckbearded victim up and points to the heavens before stuffing him between his very long legs. The crowd goes wild as TITUS! easily hoists the poor lad up and plants him with the folding powerbomb he calls SUPERNOVA! TITUS! drops to his knees and plants a single open palm on the chest for the one, the two, and the three to win this... lopsided... affair.Daehyun Moon: Yoooooouuuurrrr wwiinnneerrrr.... TIIIIHHHHHHHHHHHHH-TTTUUUUUUUHHHHHHHSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS! TITUS! Looks out into the crowd and shouts "WHO'S THE MAN!" as "Mr. Roboto hits". He stands up and WALKS! out of the ring toward his space ship. It's about this time we hear Kurt Burton rustling his headset and returning to his place at the booth.Kurt Burton: Uh, yeah... give it up for TITUS! Matthew Werner: A win's a win I guess... We focus in on the neckbearded fan who is folded up like a greasy mess in the middle of the ring.Matthew Werner: I mean... the preceding events do not reflect the values of... Werner Industries... Alecia Matthews: Scoffing. Werner Industries? Kurt Burton: YEAH WHAT INDUSTRY ARE YOU IN, MATTHEW!? Matthew Werner: Well actually I... Alecia Matthews: I bet it's Wieners! Kurt Burton: AW YEAH! GOT 'IM! They once again high five in front of Werner's face. We have fun here. Well, except for ya know... the fan who just got destroyed who is being wheeled out of the ring on a stretcher as his belt-guy friend follows behind.Alecia Matthews: Ah ha ha... yeah... We might need to write some resumes... Kurt Burton: ... Yeah... Here's hoping for some UNEMPLOYMENT BAY-BAY! Up in the rafters we see TITUS! sitting at the controls of his spaceship as it is raised by wires toward the ceiling. A blue sky beam glows down from the ceiling, TITUS!'s ship rising toward its source.Kurt Burton: ... I mean also I'm gonna have a talk with ol' BOBBO about my paycheck if we can afford these kinds of special effects! I have a FAVORED NATIONS CLAUSE DAMMIT! Alecia Matthews: Well in any event as I was... saying... before... that... Alecia pauses, waiting for another unscheduled interruption. ... We spoke, well... specifically... Katherine Fabiani spoke to the number one contender... She pauses again... waiting... ... EBR... You can hear the crinkling of her jacket as she looks from side to side. ... About his life, his legacy, his incredibly talented, celebrity wife and perhaps most importantly, his upcoming match at Scars and Stripes for the WFWF Championship!
We are greeted by the voice over work of Katherine Fabiani, as several clips of historic and memorable WFWF moments flash on screen. Could I have been more specific? Yes I could. But you could also use your imagination, so ultimately we’re both to blame for this very lackluster intro..The WFWF ... at one time one of the largest professional wrestling companies in the world. For twenty years, home to some of the greatest athletes and fierce competitors from across the globe. Until ... it wasn’t.Suddenly stock footage of a vulture in the desert plays. With rumors swirling regarding the WFWF’s lack of financial capital and emerging insolvency issues, the WFWF’s day-to-day operations and scheduled events were cancelled as they entered an indefinite hiatus. For all intents and purposes ... the WFWF ... was dead.Nooo!Until ... it wasn’t.Yay!Various screenshots and brief news footage clips flash across the screen, reminding us of the AGE’s still relatively recent purchase of the WFWF.After one year of inactivity, the wrestling community was abuzz when word broke that Abadi Global Enterprises would be acquiring the WFWF. During their inaugural press conference, new WFWF President & CEO Bobby Abadi not only announced the WFWF would resume events in July, but that their first tour would culminate with the return of Scars & Stripes - one of the marquee events of the WFWF calendar despite not occurring since 2014. It was at this time that Bobby Abadi proudly announced the main event of that show - Josh Dean ...Shots of Josh Dean, obviously.... defending the World Heavyweight Championship against EBR.They show a shot of sheep at a local petting zoo. Just kidding, they show EBR! In anticipation of this highly coveted, first time affair, I was asked to conduct a sit-down interview with the challenger. It was a change up from my usual duties of operating solely as a backstage interviewer, a role in which I generally hold a microphone in front of other people as they proceed to cut a promo while simultaneously disregarding my actual presence. It was an assignment I eagerly accepted, for I feel my talents have yet to be properly showcased ... We cut to EBR and Katherine Fabiani sitting across from one another, having a muted conversation as Fabiani’s narration concludes.... I graduated from Syracuse with a degree in broadcast journalism.Katherine Fabiani: First off, I’d like to thank you for taking the time to sit down with me today. I know how busy you’ve been. EBR: Oh of course I’d make the time. We go way back, Kay ... well, okay ... guess we’ve only known each other for like 18 months ... it seemed longer in my mind. Katherine Fabiani: Also, if it’s all the same, I prefer to go by “Katherine”. EBR: Absolutely, my apologies. Fabiani’s voiceover narrates.We were, in fact, not very close.Katherine Fabiani: Obviously, this is the first WFWF show in almost a year; what have you been up to in that time? EBR: Yeah you know ... it’s been a different year for sure. I’ve gotten so used to wrestling over the past 20 years that it’s made for a difficult adjustment, but in retrospect a much needed one ... you know, just some time to get my body rested, my mind right, stuff like that. As for what I’ve been up to ... just trying to better myself, really. Enrolled in some cooking classes, started my own fitness channel on YouTube, doing work with my program for at-risk youth, tried picking up oil painting again ... it’s been fun and rewarding, but at the end of the day I'm a wrestler and I’m just excited to get back into it. There’s a slow nod of his head.Katherine Fabiani: Of course, the elephant in the room would be your wife and her absolutely incredible - almost unprecedented - meteoric rise to superstardom over the past year. I, as we all know, am talking about the critically and commercially acclaimed Shelia Helena Espindola. There’s various shots of her performing concerts and walking red carpets, swarmed by press and screamings fans as EBR accompanies her from behind.EBR: Yeah ... yeah ... there’s also been ... that ... Katherine Fabiani: And how has that been? That certainly must be something, seeing such acclamation and adoration so up close and personal. EBR: ... Yeah I mean ... it’s been cool ... it’s been great cause she works super hard so I’m super happy and proud for her ... but that’s more her thing and I’m not really, like ... a part of it ... Katherine Fabiani: The reception online when I announced I would be conducting this interview was unlike anything I’ve ever seen. My phone was blowing up with messages from people I hadn’t seen in years, just wondering if I’d be able to get in touch with the great Shelia Helena Espindola. Awkwardly EBR nods his head slowly, waiting for a follow up which never comes.EBR: ... That wasn’t a question so I don’t really know what to say ... so I dunno, thanks? Katherine Fabiani: Playfully If I didn’t know any better I’d think most people would rather I be interviewing her. She laughs, EBR responding with a few polite chuckles afterwards.Katherine Fabiani: I’m just kidding with you. EBR: Haha ... yeah ... yeah ... Katherine Fabiani: Over the past month you’ve made multiple public appearances and engaged in several promotional events in an attempt to help promote the WFWF’s resurgence ... On cue, there are several shots of EBR on local morning news programs, wrestling related podcasts, and even a few college radio programs.Katherine Fabiani: Now, before the WFWF’s recent ... hiatus, so to speak ... you were uncharacteristically reserved and tended to shy away from the spotlight, opting to put most of your focus solely on in-ring competition. What’s changed? EBR: To be perfectly honest with you Katherine, I still have that mindset and philosophy, but the unfortunate truth is that the WFWF’s previous ... uh ... financial instability ... has left this company behind the eight ball. To be perfectly blunt ... we need eyes on the company. A year of inactivity is a long time for any company, especially in this landscape, what with the Tik Toks, the Instagrams, Netflixes, porngraphy is still very popular ... we have a lot to compete with, and we have to get the word out that we’re still here. Bobby comes up to me and tells me he needs my help to do that ... that’s what I gotta do. We all gotta make some sacrifices sometimes. Katherine Fabiani: How does that feel, being the quote un-quote she does the finger quotes which seems excessive “face of the company”? EBR: Uh ... well ... Uncomfortably, he shrugs.EBR: I don’t really consider myself ... that. To me, it’s not any one guy or girl that’s the face of the company, as much as it’s our collective talents combined and what we can create by using all of our strengths pooled together. I think the success of the WFWF is dependent not on any one person, but all of us working together and pulling our weight and effort equally to make it the best WFWF it can be. Singularly, we’re all just one person, but together ... we’re like Voltron. Katherine Fabiani: But you see yourself as the head? EBR: ... Well ... I mean I guess in the sense that someone has to be ... or you know what? What if like ... we’re all the heads? And it’s like ... a Voltron ... but made out of heads - okay the metaphor may not work anymore but the sentiment remains. Katherine Fabiani: You’ve spoken highly about Bobby Abadi; what’s your relationship like? EBR: To my understanding - and without trying to speak for him - I think just mutual respect. What you have to understand is ... most of my bosses here were pretty ... trying to think of the word here ... There’s a long pause.EBR: I’m sorry, I’m really trying to be diplomatic ... but I guess ... sketchy, would be the best word I can use? I mean, if I didn’t have guys like Rupert Jee, Higher Authority, Trace Demon, Kyzer, & Drakz running things while they’re active competitors and creating a very clear, borderline litigious conflict of interest situation, I had guys like Johnathan Parker - arrested for illegal dog fighting ... King Kraig - corrupt ... Xavier Pierce - the pink slipper ... it was never a very good work environment, and that’s just the stuff I was here for. I don't even know what the Shadow Conglomerate's deal was. Were they a business? Secret organization? An illuminati-themed ice cream operation? It was all very unclear....there was also Lila Sleater ... Katherine Fabiani: Did you two have a history? EBR: No, no that’s the thing. She seemed alright when I dealt with her during my contract negotiations in 2020 ... friendly, very pleasant interactions ... but everyone I talked to dogged her and told me she was a shrill, and bossy, and bitchy, and a ballbuster ... so who knows. There’s a brief, reflective pause as he thinks it over.EBR: ... Damn, sounds like they were just intimidated by a successful woman in a position of power. It’s a real shame about the gender inequality, double standards, and obstacles women have to overcome. Katherine Fabiani silently nods.Seriously; I graduated top of my class.EBR: Anyways, point is ... it says a lot about the GMs and CEOs I’ve dealt with when Kris Kash could be described as a borderline immoral businessman, yet is somehow still less shady than most of these other cats. But that’s where Bobby breaks the mold. Bobby isn’t just in it for himself, Bobby’s in it because he loves the WFWF. He wants the WFWF to succeed, not for personal glory or to increase his bank account, but because he wants the company to reach the heights it used to tower at. He respects the history of the WFWF, he respects the wrestlers who helped make it, and he respects the wrestlers who are going to help rebuild it. That’s the kind of guy I want to wrestle for, and frankly, I’m very glad to have the opportunity to do so. He’s also a very nice guy. He’s offered me Roughriders tickets if I’m ever in Saskatchewan during the season. There’s a pause.EBR: I mean ... I won’t be. But I appreciate the gesture. Katherine Fabiani: What do you say to people who claim Bobby Abadi is showing favoritism towards you? EBR: I think people are just so conditioned to seeing CEOs acting in their own self interests that they think if one of them is friendly or kind to anyone, there must be ulterior motives at play. That’s the sad precedent that’s been set in the WFWF for the past twenty years. It doesn’t have to be that way, and it isn’t that way. Bobby is the WFWF CEO. I’m a WFWF wrestler. I like, and get along with Bobby in the same way I got along with Hiroshi Majima when I wrestled in Japan. That’s one of the many things I learned from my time there; it is possible to run a wrestling company honorably, and it is possible to wrestle under someone you respect. I hope that Bobby takes his cues from him, because that’s the type of man the wrestling industry needs more of. He was a beautiful person ... just a beautiful, beautiful person - okay I dunno why I’m speaking in the past tense, he’s still alive.Cordiality does not equal partiality, is what I’m trying to say. Katherine Fabiani: Right, though there are some people who are questioning why you’re the number one contender without earning it. EBR: How have I not earned it, though? That’s not even speaking rhetorically, I’m actually asking anyone who claims the contrary - who has earned a title shot more than me? I’m willing to listen to anyone’s reasoning, but at the end of the day all they have are opinions while I got facts, and the facts are pretty definitive - since I returned to the WFWF in 2020, I have the most wins. He leans back in the chair, satisfied with his spitting of the truth.Katherine Fabiani: While that is true, do you not feel it’s a little misleading when that total is only three? EBR: ... I mean ... that says more about the WFWF’s inability to run shows consistently then it does me. Those are problems with management and scheduling, and God willing, Bobby’s gonna fix that. But I could only play the cards I was dealt, and while I’ll give you I may only have three wins, you know who that’s more than? He cocks his head and looks at Katherine, waiting for a response.Katherine Fabiani: ... Everyone else? EBR: Stats don’t lie. Katherine Fabiani: Well just to play devil’s advocate; couldn’t someone make the argument that with such a large gap between WFWF shows, all records should be reset? And then in that case, there could be a perception that you were given a title shot that - and these are not my words - “you’ve done nothing to earn”? EBR: Whose perception? You mean Joe Bishop’s? Katherine Fabiani: I wasn’t trying to be specific. EBR: I get that, but Joe brought it up, not me So again, I ask sincerely - what more do I have to do to “earn” a title shot? I’m very curious. I’d like to be enlightened. Who’s standing in an imaginary line that I’m cutting in front of? He brought me up without being asked, so it’s obvious he’s got no problem name dropping ... yet when the time comes to name who’s earned a title shot, or who isn’t getting opportunity because the WFWF values “profit over ability” ... suddenly names don’t leave his lips anymore. So ... He shrugs. Just like that.EBR: It’s ... whatever. I beat everyone in front of me, was undeniably next-in-line, and then the WFWF seized operations for a year. Now some people demand I do it again, and for what? So I can continue to jump through imaginary hoops? The people who say I didn’t earn a title shot yesterday are gonna be the same ones who refute when I earn one tomorrow. So ... I don’t have the energy or space in my life for other people’s negativity. Unless those same people are gonna advocate for vacating all the titles, the win/loss record carries over. That’s my mindset, anyway. Joe’s entitled to his opinion and I respect that ... but man ... He chuckles, before taking a sip of water from the nearby table ... Joe’s out here acting like I just stole the belt and wouldn’t give it back until I got a match or something ... Katherine Fabiani: I guess that brings us to your opponent ... Josh Dean. EBR: Great wrestler. Katherine Fabiani: But it’s clear you don’t agree with some of his ... methods, in the past couple of years. EBR: It’s ... unbecoming, to talk about someone else’s situation when you’re not involved and you weren’t there for the events that started it. Katherine Fabiani: Fair enough, but you were there when Josh Dean stole the Heavyweight Title and essentially strong-armed the WFWF into giving him a title match at SuperBrawl. EBR: That’s true. Katherine Fabiani: So .... opinions? Was that the right way for Josh to handle the situation? EBR: Whatever led Josh to act like he did ... I don’t think it’s really my place to judge on things I’m not privy to, you know? But if you’re asking me ... would I want to get a title shot that way ... no. That’s not how I would go about it, no. Kay looks to ask another question, but is interrupted before she can do so.EBR: But like ... I get it. He had to call his shot somehow and do what he felt he had to do to guarantee he’d get his match with Drakz. He felt the best way to do that was to hold the belt and subsequent title picture hostage. Like ... regardless what my opinion on the matter is, I can’t knock the hustle ... and it worked, so it got results too. Josh had to look out for Josh, and just looking at it through his perspective; he got screwed before, why wouldn’t he get screwed again? It was a strong decision in hindsight, really ... especially since I was coming in, and to give some credence to Joe Bishop, with Kris Kash running the joint? I probably could have walked into his office and demanded a title shot then and there, and I probably would have gotten it, too. Katherine Fabiani: But you didn’t want to do that. EBR: No, no I didn’t ... but let’s be fair; Josh had no way of knowing that, so he had to do what he had to do and physically keep the belt in his possession ... pause ... ‘ya know, it’s possible they might have just said “screw it” and made a newer, shinier one for Drakz and to fight over, in that case. Katherine Fabiani: Speaking of you facing Drakz .... The last time you were seen in the WFWF - the last image of the WFWF, period - was the announcement that you two would be facing one another in the main event of “Blood Money” in Saudi Arabia. What happened there? EBR: The WFWF shut down for a year. Katherine Fabiani: Yes, but it has been documented that both you and Drakz went to Saudi Arabia for a joint press conference as a promotional event. It seemed like the match was set and all but finalized. EBR: Yeah I mean ... it just didn’t work out. That’s the thing about contracts and contract negotiations; sometimes they just fall apart. It’s disappointing but everything happens for a reason, and because of it we’re now moving forward with the Ascension tour as we head towards Scars & Stripes. Can’t wait. Katherine Fabiani: Let’s talk about Scars & Stripes and your upcoming match for the World Heavyweight Championship. You’ve won the belt three times previously. How much would this fourth one mean to you? EBR: It would mean everything. This is why I came back to the WFWF two years ago, for this opportunity to finally cement my legacy. To finally have that accomplishment and defining moment I can be proud of. You brought up the previous three Championship wins ... and they’re empty accolades. They’re “yeah ... buts”. I don’t look back fondly on any of them. I don’t want them to be what’s brought up when my name gets mentioned ten, twenty years in the future. Katherine Fabiani: And why is that? EBR: Because I prided myself on being the greatest wrestler in the history of the WFWF, and none of them represent that. Just look at them. In 2003 ... man, I just wasn’t ready. I lost it one week later like some flash in the pan. Alright, fine. It wasn’t my time yet, but I figured I’d have another chance to correct that. And then I did, and it was 2008 ... that should have been my career achievement. I won the Scars & Stripes Battle Royal and I walked into SuperBrawl and won the World Heavyweight Championship in front of my hometown. I told myself “this is your moment. This is your career. This is you”, and I was going to have one of the greatest reigns in WFWF history and become one of the greatest champions this industry had ever seen. There’s a somber, lengthy pause.EBR: I didn’t do any of that. As it turned out, I couldn’t handle the pressure and I let the expectations live rent free in my head until all I was doing was making poor decision after poor decision, until six months after winning the Heavyweight Championship in what should have been the defining moment of my career, I’m suspended for a DUI and stripped of the title. That’s how my greatest achievement ends. There’s another pause.EBR: And then 2011 ... that’s a legend that’s been pretty well documented by this point. He grits his teeth and shakes his head slowly in a mixture of disgust, shame, and embarrassed amusement.EBR: It says a lot that testing positive for performance enhancing drug tests is only 4th or 5th on the list of scummy things I did. That’s what I made of my career and every opportunity I was given, and I can’t blame anyone but myself. It’s a creation of my own doing. I had every opportunity to be something respectable and admired in this industry and I squandered it every single time. Yet ironically ... as the years pass the WFWF places me on a podium and my name has some mythical connotation attached and I’m heralded as one of the greatest this company has ever seen. All my sins and flaws forgotten, fading away with the passage of time. For the first time, the look on EBR’s face changes from the casual and “matter-of-fact” disposition that’s been prevalent throughout the interview to that of a ... let’s call it “intense” nature.EBR: But I didn’t forget. That stain that still smudges my legacy and that blotch that resides on the face of my Hall of Fame bust - I can still see them. This is my chance to change that. This is my chance to correct those wrongs - however possible it may be - and make a new defining moment. I can’t change my history, but I can change the narrative surrounding it. When my name gets brought up, I want Scars & Stripes 2022 to ruminate through people’s memories. I want this to be the EBR everyone remembers. I’m sick of living in infamy. He deeply stares.EBR: I want greatness. Actual, legitimate ... meaningful greatness. Josh Dean ... I respect the hell out of him. He’s an incredible athlete and an even better wrestler. He’s the best wrestler in the WFWF today. He is the mountain I need to scale, and I’m well aware of the difficulty involved. If defeating Josh Dean is what it takes, if that’s how much work it’ll take ... well pardon my language, but I got my f*cking Timberlands on. I’ve been waiting for this day for eight years. This has been my life for eight years, just waiting for this opportunity to do it the right way. This is why I went to Japan, this is why I came back to the WFWF, this is why I waited for the phone to ring for a whole year, just waiting for the WFWF to resume ... for this moment. So if anyone - anyone - thinks they’ve seen the best that EBR has to offer ... After a dramatic pause, he lets out a slight chuckle.EBR: ... They ain’t seen sh**. He leans back in his chair, letting several moments pass before he returns to his previously calmer demeanour.EBR: Sorry for cussing. He looks into the camera.EBR: ... Go Roughriders. And with that, we fade to black for a commercial break.
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Post by Swarm on Jul 2, 2022 17:58:43 GMT -5
The swirling opening synth of "Points of Authority" by Linkin Park is met in kind by a succession of clips of Alex Sean throughout his career. Stylistically, these clips are showcased by fading in and out from black.
We see Alex Sean as Alex Showtime once more. A couple of years later after dropping the Showtime name and truly beginning to come into his own. Shortly thereafter in 2006 during The Anointed's run in the WFWF. His return to the WFWF in 2008 teaming with DGX for the first time in six years. Returning once more with The Anointed culminating in their victory at Battleground.
If you havin' girl problems I feel bad for you son I got 99 problems, but a b**** ain't one - hit me!
Finally we fade in from black however this time, as opposed to a result of editing, it is as it occurred live in the building on December 2nd, 2009 where the lights came up to reveal Alex Sean appearing behind an unsuspecting Trace Demon. The King of Demons turns around just in time for a Left-Arm Lariat which connects right as the beat drops! The first few barres before the beginning of the verse center on Sean's feud with Trace Demon. We see clips of their numerous verbal altercations juxtaposed with DGX delivering the Breakdown to Thunder as Sean Left-Arm Lariats Trace Demon out of the ring to the floor. DGX pins Thunder and once again Sean and he stand tall as WFWF Tag Team Champions (Of which they also... never lost...). Finally, just before the verse begins, we see a quick succession of highlights of Sean's match at SuperBrawl VI with Trace Demon culminating in his victory for the WFWF World Heavyweight Championship.
Got 'em Mike He's got the Rap Patrol on the gat patrol Foes that wanna make sure his casket's closed Rap critics that say he's "Money, Cash, Hoes" He's from the hood stupid, what type of facts are those?
Along with the verse we begin a series of clips highlighting King Kraig's escalating resentments of Sean. Clips of Kraig exasperated upon Sean's absence are juxtaposed with brief clips of Sean competing in the XWA at the very same time.
If you grew up with holes in your zapatos You'd celebrate the minute you was havin' dough So f*** critics, you can kiss the whole a**hole If you don't like the lyrics, you can press fast forward
We see Sean lose the title to Wayne McGurk at Consequences Will Never Be the Same then, in a bout with a championship rematch on the line, be cost the victory by a returning Reverend Shadow serving as Kraig's hired gun.
Got beef with radio if we don't play they show They don't play our hits, we don't give a s***, so! All these mags try and use our ass So advertisers can give 'em more cash for ads, f***ers!
The highlights follow the trajectory of the story; Alex Sean and Reverend Shadow staring each other down at multiple points. Sean defeats Trace Demon for the number one contendership and as Shadow launches an attack, EBR and DGX rush in to make the save.
I don't know what you take us as Or understand the intelligence that Jay-Z has From, rags to riches, we ain't dumb We got 99 problems, but a b**** ain't one - hit me!
We see Sean in yet another confrontation with King Kraig that turns out to be a set-up for an assault by XWA superstar Angelus that leaves Sean with injured ribs. This leads into Indiana Jones V where Sean takes on Thunder (Again, right? I mean seriously.) Sean and Thunder engage in a thrilling encounter concluding with Sean regaining the WFWF Championship once again!
99 problems, but a b**** ain't one If you havin' girl problems I feel bad for you son I got 99 problems, but a b**** ain't one - hit me!
At this point the video skips the second verse and, as the beat transitions from "Points of Authority" to "One Step Closer", King Kraig walks out on the stage to announce Sean will be defending the title again that very night... against EBR.
99 problems, but a b**** ain't one If you havin' girl problems I feel bad for you son I got 99 problems, but a b**** ain't one - hit me!
The bout is merely a formality. EBR delivers a Yakuza Kick and a Folding Powerbomb, defeating the weakened Sean in moments. The beat drops as EBR stands triumphantly raising his prize for betraying his longtime ally and friend.
Now once upon a time, not too long ago A ***** like myself had to strong arm a ho This is not a ho in the sense of havin' a p**** But a p**** havin' no God damn sense, try an' push me
From there the pace quickens. A gloating King Kraig standing beside Reverend Shadow is met by an enraged Alex Sean hopping the barricade and getting himself thrown in the clink. We cut to Sean confronting Shadow only to be betrayed by another longtime ally, his protege Calvin Lee. The two leave Sean laying in a heap after a brutal asssault.
I try to ignore him, talk to the Lord Pray for him, but some fools just love to perform You know the type, loud as a motorbike But wouldn't bust a grape in a fruit fight
This leads to highlights from Alex Sean and DGX facing EBR and Reverend Shadow for the WFWF Tag Team Championship which was in the possession of EBR and DGX at the time. The teams battle one another culminating in Sean and Shadow brawling outside of the ring while, as EBR hoists DGX up for a Powerbomb, DGX clobbers him with his cast-encased arm securing the victory and once again the WFWF Tag Team Championships for he and Alex Sean (I cannot stress how much they never lost those titles. I mean I guess you could also argue EBR and Sean never lost them either but... still...)
And only thing that's gon' happen is I'mma get to clappin' and He and his boys gon' be yappin' to the Captain And there I go, trapped in the Kit-Kat again Back through the system with the riff-raff again
From there we quickly move through more highlights of Sean and Reverend Shadow leading to their violent Dog Collar Match at Attack! of the Little Green Men 2. They engage in an absolute war that concludes with Sean delivering his Bolt of Blazing Gold finisher and pinning Reverend Shadow to settle this longstanding rivalry once and for all. We then see EBR defeat DGX to retain his championship setting the stage for SuperBrawl VII.
Fiends on the floor, scratchin' again Paparazzis with they cameras, snappin' them D.A. try to give a ***** shaft again Half a mill' for bail cause I'm African
We move to the final leg of this rivalry beginning with Alex Sean defeating The High Horror (RIP) who was Kraig's hand-picked opponent. We see Kraig announce EBR will be facing Alex's original tag team partner, long-retired and by then very much out of shape, Adam Chartbuster. The ensuing bout is a spectacle of brutality as EBR devastates the defenseless buster of charts. The champion finishes the bout with an extra brutal George Atkinson Lariat to the back of Adam's neck rendering him completely unresponsive. As he is stretchered out, Sean is practically responseless.
All because this fool was harassin' them Tryin' to play the boy like he's saccharin But ain't nuttin' sweet bout how I hold my gun I got 99 problems bein' a b**** ain't one - hit me!
We see a succession of clips involving EBR trying to smoke out an absent Alex Sean including bringing Sean's ex-wife Rebecca Marie out to disparage him. Sean finally responds with a video. He grew a beard. Things were escalating rapidly. A match with Calvin Lee turns into a chaotic brawl that leads a bloody and wounded EBR to, in a fit of petulant rage, stab Sean square in the mid-section with a spearhead.
99 problems, but a b**** ain't one If you havin' girl problems I feel bad for you son I got 99 problems, but a b**** ain't one - hit me!
Sean is flocked by paramedics and rushed out of the building as a dead-eyed EBR stands gazing at the puddle of blood where Sean was bleeding out.
99 problems, but a b**** ain't one If you havin' girl problems I feel bad for you son I got 99 problems, but a b**** ain't one - hit me!
The lyrics momentarily cease, the music building energy toward it's climax (lol). We see a brief clip of Sean and EBR staring one another down at the final event before SuperBrawl VII, then footage of their respective walkouts in New Orleans. Just as the match gets underway, the furious shoutings of the late Chester Bennington break out and the beat drops once again.
Shut up when I'm talkin' to you! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up when I'm talkin' to you! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! I'm about to break!
The two battle back and forth in a thrilling encounter, exchanging big moves. Kicking out of them. That sort of thing.
Everything you say to me (I got 99 problems, but a b**** ain't one - hit me!) I need a little room to breathe (I got 99 problems, but a b**** ain't one - hit me!)
The match escalates with both men delivering some of their highest impact moves and either kicking out or making it to the ropes. The match finally draws to its close, a bout years in the making, with EBR delivering a Back Drop Driver onto the buckles to Sean then following it up with a George Atkinson Lariat. He covers, and he is victorious.
Everything you say to me (I got 99 problems, but a b**** ain't one - hit me!)
Both men recover enough to mobilize. As Alex Sean prepares to exit the ring a defeated man, he and EBR share a brief staredown but it is not one of intensity, a silent vow that this is not over, or even a look of mutual respect. It is only a look of a truly and thoroughly defeated individual staring down the engine of his defeat.
I need a little room to breathe (I got 99 problems)
Sean exits the ring and makes his way up the ramp. He stares at an appreciative crowd in New Orleans, an audience that clearly sees, whether victorious or not, that from the very beginnings of Kraig's war against him and despite every dirty trick, Sean fought honorably and that is a victory unto itself.
And I'm about to, break!
Sean stares at them, and he does not agree.
We cut back to the live feed once again to the announce booth where our commentary team awaits their cue.
Alecia Matthews: Well viewers, it’s been a huge night for the WFWF so far, more on all of that in a moment. More pressing is the announcement of the return of the WFWF Rumble, it's first entrant being DGX who will be entering at number one, and of course our main event for next week by DGX which will aim to establish himself as the undisputed greatest of all time starting with defeating Trace Demon.
Matthew Werner: That's about the long and short of it.
Alecia Matthews: So with that said, I’ve just received word that we have the man himself standing by backstage with a response to both of those events, so let’s catch up with the "King of Demons" Trace Demon!
The feed cuts backstage where Trace Demon paces around the set usually used for interviews. Right now it is only Trace, a microphone in hand, and a building sense of tense anxiety.
Trace Demon: The WFWF is back, and already the same old mistakes are being made.
He comes to a stop, turning to stare down the camera.
Trace Demon: Let’s be honest here, how do you run a big return show and headline it with Alex Sean against Danny Candlebatch? Is that his name? Doesn’t matter, I don’t care. The only thing I care about is that yet again the WFWF fails to utilise their talent properly, but that’s what you get when you let people who don’t have a clue book your shows. Here we are, night one of WFWF’s big return, and the one man you want on your show doesn’t even have a match booked. Pathetic.
He spits the last word out, vitriol bubbling with his every word.
Trace Demon: But have no fear, the universe finds a way, if you believe in that rubbish. Because there I am, minding my own business, and who do I hear laying down the challenge of the century? None other than DGX. The same DGX that I beat to win my first WFWF World Championship might I add. Seems like all these years later that’s still eating away at him, sad really. I’ve had so many other star-making moments since then that I’d all but forgotten which has-been I’d taken the title off, because let’s be honest here, the loser doesn’t matter, and that’s what you were, wasn’t it D? A loser. But thanks for reminding me, always nice to know when you’ve got some rent-free space to live in in someones head.
What a mean fellow. Seriously.
Trace Demon: But don’t you worry D, if you want to take another loss to the King of Demons I’ll happily oblige, at least nobody can say I don’t do my bit for charity. So sure, I’m officially accepting the challenge, next week, Trace Demon vs. DGX, one-on-one for the first time in... well, I’m sure you remember better than I do D, to me it was just another day at the office. At least it’ll give me a little warm up for the real business of the day, Scars & Stripes. Yes ladies and gentleman the WFWF Rumble is back, which means you get a few weeks of people declaring for a match they can’t possibly hope to win, because as always the winner has already been decided.
He pauses.
Trace Demon: Me.
Trace Demon pauses to nod once more as the crowd audibly reacts to now the second entrant in the WFWF Rumble!
Trace Demon: And you see usually competing in a match like this, full of people who don’t really deserve to be in the ring with me... well that’d be beneath me, but the fact that I wasn’t even booked tonight, the fact that my match next week is only happening because of a challenge and not the recognition that I am the WFWF, that I am the be all and end all, the alpha and the omega, the unbeatable final boss of this company and this industry, well you can say I’m a little pissed off! Which is why I’m entering that rumble with the sole intention of tearing every single person in my way apart, leaving their mangled remains in my wake and reminding you all why you should worship at the damn altar of Trace fu...
He trails off mid-sentence as his attention is drawn away by Shuggy walking into frame from the left hand side of the camera, headphones in, paying no attention to what’s going on. Suddenly Trace, with an incredulous expression, snatches the headphones, yanking them right out of his ears and glaring a hole right through his head.
Shuggy: Awright mate, what’s yer problem?
Shuggy spots the camera, and the microphone.
Shuggy: Oh you’re doin' a thing right now, aren’t ya? My bad mate, didnae mean to intrude or nothing, just wasnae paying attention, you get right back to what you were doing and I’ll shoot.
Trace Demon: Are you being serious?
Trace stares at Shuggy, who seems confused.
Trace Demon: First the press conference, now this?
Shuggy: Not sure I follow but-
Trace Demon: I mean you, showing me nothing but disrespect. You, a nobody, having the nerve to-
Shuggy: Well now hold on, there’s nae need to be throwing names about. Ya dinnae even know me.
Trace Demon: Exactly! I dinnae know you, nobody knows you, you’re nothing, an afterthought, not even fit to be in the same company as me, let alone the same ring, who the hell do you think you are coming in here and not showing the proper respect to you betters?
Shuggy: Well firstly mate, I think you mean ma elder, which you certainly are. Better though? You havnae proved that. Funny you mention me being an afterthought though, at least I was actually booked for a match next week, didnae need some challenge to get maself on the card. Aye, I heard you werenae even gonna be on the show next week before DGX laid out that wee challenge. And two, you think I dinnae belong in the same ring as ya? Let me ask you summin, you gonna be in tha’ big rumble at Scars & Stripes?
Trace Demon: If you’d been paying attention instead of walking about listening to whatever it is you listen to, you’d already know that I am.
Shuggy: Well surprise! So am I, so I guess I’ll see you in the ring after all, won’t I? That’s, if you’re in there long enough. Oh, and good luck against DGX mate, not everyday you getta fight a legend, good for you pal.
Shuggy pops his headphones back in and walks off singing to himself ♫space travel’s in ma blood♫, leaving Trace Demon seeing red, a vein in his head just asking to explode out of the side of it in anger.
Trace Demon: This god damned place!
He lobs his microphone at the floor, shattering it into pieces and storming off in frustration, fury and the very real feeling that somebody is going to pay for this. With that, we return to the booth and our crack broadcast team. Not the drug, they're just doing a great job is all I'm saying. Alecia Matthews: Well guys, this has been quite the evening!
Kurt Burton: YOU AIN'T KIDDING! J'YEAH!
Alecia Matthews: Of course as we just discussed, DGX hit us with a triple threat between announcing the WFWF Rumble on behalf of Bobby Abadi, his decision to enter the Rumble at number one, and of course our main event for He'll Kick You Apart, He'll Kick You Apart... DGX vs. Trace Demon.
Matthew Werner: That's true but let's not forget what we just heard, right Kurt?
Kurt Burton: Oh you guys are on your own with that one I didn't understand a damn thing either of those JERK-BRONIS said!
Matthew Werner: Right... Well, what they said was now we know that both Trace Demon AND Shuggy will be in the WFWF Rumble as well!
Alecia Matthews: Plus that won't be the only time Shuggy and Trace Demon will be in action on the same night as he will be in action on our next event as well!
Matthew Werner: That's huge. We also will be sitting down, just as we did this past week with EBR, with the WFWF World Heavyweight Champion Josh Dean to get his thoughts on the state of things and of course his upcoming match with EBR at Scars and Stripes!
Alecia Matthews: I've also been informed that... Muttering ... Barring any future travel issues... The Daughters of Kaos will be in action and, furthermore, the WFWF Vanguard Champion Johnny Mason will be competing as well!
Matthew Werner: Wow! What a terrific lineup!
Kurt Burton: You JERK-BRONI! She didn't even announce any new matches!
Matthew Werner: Oh... yeah that's a... good point... actually.
Alecia Matthews: Well one might imagine the current status of who is precisely booked against who is in a somewhat mercurial state as when one thing changes it changes everything else which changes everything else and... Suffice it to say Bobby Abadi has his work cut out for him.
Matthew Werner: I'm sure whatever the right track is, he'll sniff it out.
Kurt Burton: That's not the only thing he's been...
Alecia Matthews: Ohhhhhhhhh kay..... Let's roll the pre-tape, yeah? Alecia gestures in a rolling motion with her right hand to the production crew who very quickly oblige.
The growling opening line of "Monster" by Kanye West is accompanied by the visual of EBR, DGX, Bullseye, and Alex Sean rushing toward the ring from the crowd on May 24th, 2013... XWA Legends.I shoot the lights out!The image appears just as the first line is roared, then, upon it's conclusion we cut to black.Hide 'til it's bright outWe then see EBR grab a poor security guard by the neck as they near the barricade and drive the man face-first into the steel. As the quartet hop the rail the second line concludes and we cut to black once more.Oh, just another lonely nightWe're then treated to a succession of shots of the group laying waste to Trace Demon and Rose following their grueling main event battle with the assistance of baseball bats then, as before, cut to black.Are you willing to sacrifice your life?Next a succession of shots of the group brutalizing a helpless Trace Demon leaving the striking visual of his crimson face leaking onto a dented XWA World Heavyweight Championship. Then, cut to black.Ahh!The shrieking scream of terror leads us into Rick Ross' weak opening verse and the video takes somewhat of a retroactive step to tell it's tale. The video jumps all the way back to 2008 in the WFWF highlighting the reunion of Alex Sean and DGX as a tag team. Despite years as virtual enemies, that chemistry as a unit still exists and is showcased with a quick succession of clips of their victories as a unit en route to defeating The Revolution for the WFWF Tag Team Championship. From there we see a very quick collage briefly showcasing their 2009 WFWF Tag Team victories once more and their victory over Drama and Tempest at the XWA revival's first event bringing us to XWA in 2010.B****, I'm a monster no-good blood sucker Fat motherf***er, now look who's in trouble As you run through my jungles, all you hear is rumbles Kanye Wests sample, here's one for exampleWe see a collage of clips of Alex Sean's return to the XWA in 2010 showcasing his bouts with Jack Sabbath, Angelus... there were probably others... Just as Rick Ross' verse nears its conclusion the reformation of Rated X in late 2010 is highlighted. Alex Sean, DGX, Hutton Brown, Dan Bennett, Satine X, and others. A lineup of killers. Sean and DGX's tag team accolades are showcased as we begin to cycle between their collective victories in the XWA, WFWF, and PRW.Gossip, gossip, n****, just stop it Everybody know (I'm a motherf***in' monster) I'ma need to see your f***in' hands at the concert I'ma need to see your f***in' hands at the concertIn quick succession brief clips are shown of their wins across all three promotions, ultimately each reel concluding with the moments of them winning the companies' respective Tag Team Championships until we conclude with the image of Sean and DGX holding all three titles at the same time. Just as well, Sean's feud with Angelus and Rated X's general devious exploits are shown altogether serving as the prologue for the final incarnation of Sean's persona... The Monster.Profit, profit, n****, I got it Everybody know I'm a motherf***in' monster I'ma need to see your f***in' hands at the concert I'ma need to see your f***in' handsWe skip right over Kanye's entertaining but meandering verse and right to Jay-Z's. As HOV himself fixates on a series of famous monsters, we see a quick collage of Sean's monster-themed entrances. He knocks out a man in a Godzilla costume who is rampaging over a knee-high model Tokyo. Sean stakes The Count from Sesame Street then punts him into a ravenous PRW audience. Wearing a CRUSH DAVIS jersey, Sean hits a home run sending a baseball flying into a giant, inflatable Stay Puft Marshmellow man. The Monster spears a multi-person Ogopogo with an American flag sending it careening into a pond off the side of the stage. Alex Sean vanquishes a kettle of Toronto Raptors, knocks out a Drake impersonator, then dunks a basketball! (That one is admittedly highly contextual.)Sasquatch, Godzilla, King Kong, Lochness Goblin, ghoul, a zombie with no conscience Question, what do these things all have in common? Everybody knows I'm a motherf***in' monsterAnd thus we catch up with our flashforward to the XWA in 2013. We see a quick reminder of Rated X's devastation to Trace Demon and Rose at Legends. This is followed by a series of clips of their many attacks on the roster. Drake Dysfunction, Ace Andrews, Eddie Kirkham, Satine X... Trace Demon again (This poor guy), and others. Each clip following the same basic pattern of sneak attacks with larger numbers involving weapons that leave their victims in a heap. All of this placing a very cold and calculated ultimatum at the feet of the XWA: Sign us on our terms or we will make everyone's life a living hell.Conquer, stomp ya, stop your silly nonsense Nonsense, none of you n****s know where the swamp is None of you n****s have seen the carnage that I've seen I still here fiends scream in my dreamsThis culminates as Rated X face Trace Demon, Derrick Jedi, and Dan Bennett in an unsanctioned cage match at Lord of the Ring on August 2nd, 2013. Dan Bennett reveals his true colors, betraying his XWA allies and rejoining Rated X. Inside the cage is a scene of brutality that resulted in all those mofos catching a case.Murder, murder in black convertibles I kill a block I murder avenues, ah r*** and pillage a village, women and children Everybody wanna know what my Achilles heel isClearly their extortion of the company worked as we highlight Sean's return match against Derrick Jedi of which virtually nobody read but, primarily, involved Sean uncharacteristically utilizing Bullseye at ringside to help him cheat to win. One could go back and read it now and probably draw the conclusion his opponent was portrayed in a far more respectable light than deserved... ... Anyway... Highlights of Sean's equally sketchy victory over Drake Dysfunction are seen as well and the pattern is clear; Sean is neither the physical being he once was nor is he of the same principles.Love, I don't get enough of it All I get is these vampires and blood suckers All I see is these n****s I made millionaires Millin' about, spillin' they feelings in the airThis leads us to Alex Sean and Trace Demon at XWA Doomsday. Trace Demon is clearly the better athlete of the two on this night outmaneuvering an aging Sean. He appears to have the match in the bag but is thwarted thanks to timely interference by Bullseye leading to a Suicide Dive aimed at Sean eating nothing but a steel folding chair.All I see is these fake f***s with no fangs Tryna draw blood from my ice-cold veins I smell a massacre Seems to be the only way to back you bastards upSean goes on the attack, viciously targeting Demon's now-damaged arm. Eventually Demon turns the tide. They trade moves back and forth. Sean delivers his ultimate finisher The Bolt of Blazing Gold but, for the first and only time ever, it is kicked out of by the "King of Demons"! Sean stares at his nemesis in complete shock and disbelief. Before he can capitalize he recieves a serving of Red Mist by the always-sly Trace Demon.Gossip, gossip, n****, just stop it Everybody know (I'm a motherf***in' monster) I'ma need to see your f***in' hands at the concert I'ma need to see your f***in' hands at the concertThey exchange high impact offense but ultimately, Trace Demon ends up behind Sean and locks him in the Rear-Naked Choke. It is clear this match has been decided but that righteous outcome is thwarted due to a masked fan hopping the barricade and pulling the ref from the ring. After a brief chase the individual is revealed to be none other than King Kraig!Profit, profit, n****, I got it Everybody know I'm a motherf***in' monster I'ma need to see your f***in' hands at the concert I'ma need to see your f***in' handsWith the conclusion of the chorus we jump past Nicki Minaj's supremely whack verse (Ya know in retrospect there is, admittedly, a lot of whack going on in this... Anyway...) and, after a brief instrumental section, begin Bon Iver's mournful finale. Meanwhile, in the midst of all of the chaos, Sean manages to gather enough time and wits to launch a fireball in the face of Trace Demon. He follows up by locking in the Quoth the Ravens and, after Demon is found to be unconscious, declared the winner. Alex Sean wins the XWA World Heavyweight Championship for the first and only time.I, I crossed the limelight And I'll, I'll let God decide-cide And I, I wouldn't last these shows So I, I am headed home (headed home)Sean stands triumphant, raising the XWA World Heavyweight Championship standing alongside Bullseye and now King Kraig. This image is alternated with quick cuts to time's past as well as events to come. In the past we see clips of Sean's many confrontations with King Kraig, clips of all that was done to him by Kraig's associates. Likewise we see footage that shows the tenuous nature of Sean's grasp as the "King of the Ashes" in the XWA.I, I crossed the limelight And I'll, I'll let God decide-cide And I, I wouldn't last these shows So I, I am headed home (headed home)The image of him raising the title followed by images of the feud with EBR, the spearhead, SuperBrawl VII. Back to the championship, then forward in time to his final match in the XWA against Angelus where he is defeated, poetically, via a fireball.I, I crossed the limelight (no, the limelight) And I'll, I'll let God decide-cide And I, I wouldn't last these showsAnd thus the video reaches its conclusion of Sean reaching the highest pinnacle of his career for but a fleeting moment and the only price was everything else.So I, I am headed home (headed home)With these final words, we fade to black.
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Post by Swarm on Jul 2, 2022 17:58:54 GMT -5
The fourth ever WFWF Ascension returns live to the Chesapeake Employers Insurance Arena, the lights dimmed similarly to how the show began. Let's see that picture again! See how there's the logo on the apron and everything? Nevertheless, it is MAIN EVENT TIME and you can tell... because I told you it is... but also there are no other matches left other than that one so context clues but... EVEN IF YOU DIDN'T have that information you might gleam such insights as we cut to the center of the ring where the wonderful Daehyun Moon is standing glowing in what is either a spotlight or his transcendant, natural radiance.Daehyun Moon: Lllllllllladies and gentlemennnn.... THIS! ... Is our mmmmmain event offfffffffffffffff the eeeeevening! Innnnntroducing first! The infectious opening groove of "Ain't Nobody" by Chaka Khan plays over the soundspeakers as a warm, reddish-orange hue illuminates the building.Alecia Matthews: This is it, folks! After eleven years away from the WFWF, nine years away from the business entirely, we are just a few moments away from the return of Alex Sean! Kurt Burton: ALEX SEAN? HOW ABOUT THE MATTER AT HAND, ALECIA!? DAVID HANDLECATCH IS BACK! AW YEAH! Matthew Werner: He does make a point, we haven't seen HANDLECATCH! in many years and though he achieved... relative... little... success... he was surely seen as an excellent athlete with speed, agility, fleet-footed... As if summoned, DAVID HANDLECATCH!... lumbers... out... on the stage... Matthew Werner: Ooohh... Tsk sound. ... Well... Kurt Burton: Is anybody else feeling the icey pull of oblivion or is my Delta-8 edible finally kicking in? DAVID HANDLECATCH! moves... let's call it intentionally... down the ramp. Alecia Matthews: Well... remember guys, you can't judge... a book... by it's cover. Ya know what? In fact, I'ma say it: I'm hyped! I sincerely hope we see a new and improved DAVID HANDLECATCH! here tonight! Matthew Werner: Yeah and I seriously hope Bobby Abadi paid for insurance. HANDLECATCH! makes his way down the ramp, bringing his palms together and bowing at every person he identifies as ethnically east-Asian.Daehyun Moon: ENTERING THE RIINNNNGGGG.... Pllllllllease welcome.... DAAAAAAAAVIIIIDDDDDDDDD HAAAAAANNNNNNDDLLLLEEEEECAAAAAAAAATCH! Despite his idiosyncrasies, HANDLECATCH! is a well-respected and established martial artist with many admirers. He passes a group of Shaolin monks who place a a ceremonial necklace made from their most blind, most celibate brothers. He passes a group of children on a field trip from their local Tae-Kwon-Do gym who places a decorative wreath on his very large, increasingly sweaty head.Kurt Burton: YUCK! WHAT ARE THESE LIL JERK-BRONIS DOING HERE!? THIS AIN'T NO PLACE FAH'KIDS! DAVID HANDLECATCH! reaches the steps, his eyes widening as he stares up the heights he must traverse. With a deep breath, HANDLECATCH! gingerly ascends the stairs to such a degree as to receive some supportive applause from fans at ringside. DAVID enters the ring then brings his palms together and nods at Daehyun Moon who smiles back with a very add one to the class-action case kind of smile. Finally HANDLECATCH! takes the center awaiting his opponent as the music fades.Alecia Matthews: Here we go! For a few moments the arena is filled with the sound of a buzzing audience chattering a way like a bunch of chatty Kathies. The audience is waiting with baited breath for the arrival of the legendary superstar until..."Ladies and gentlemen... If I could have ya'll's attention...." A gruff, East Baltimore accent spoken through gritted teeth speaks out over the soundspeakers. We cut to the stage as a much slimmer and noticeably aged Bullseye walks out behind the curtain. He's also going for this... Southern... Sheriff.. look. It's probably a phase. ... I mean he's not... not pulling it off...Alecia Matthews: Wow, folks! Longtime viewers of course would recognize that as Bullseye, Alex Sean's former hype man. Kurt Burton: HYPE MAN?! IN ROCK N ROLL WE DON'T NEEEEED HYPE MAN! WE ARE... our.... hype... man... um... J'YEAH! Matthew Werner: ... Well regardless I'm sure we are all in for an electrifying introduction! The artist formerly known as Bullseye pauses, nodding graciously to the few fans in attendance who recognize him as well as some of his previous customers. Let's leave it at that.Lamont Carter: My name... is Lamont Carter... and I am here to introduce you all to my main mans... His calm, laid-back demeanor washes over the audience who have settled down as much. ... I'ma tell ya'll right here this guy? This man is... the singular greatest. No question. He's got the kind of fire that only a... damned... demon... made in the cauldron of bad intentions by the fallen one his very got-damn self... Yakub... could ever obtain! Lamont chuckles wryly. ... ha ha... Yes, he was as brilliant as he was a damned dirty villain. Lamont Carter: Nodding his head solemnly. ... Well Yakub's wicked intentions to subjugate his black brothers and sisters is about to come back on you... HANDLECATCH! ... I don't think that's really ironic but it's messed up. Please welcome... Yakub's most wicked creation.... the Mmmmaaahhhhnnnnster... his got'damn self... My man... Alex... Sean! And finally... mercifully... the opening line of "Monster" by Kanye West breaks out over the PA system!I shoot the lights out!As these words are spoken, the lights in the building cut out. Like they're being SHOT OUT. Eh?Hide 'til it's bright out Oh, just another lonely night Are you willing to sacrifice your life? Ahh!Upon the shrill scream a pulsating light strobes in unison with the chaotic drums of Rick Ross' introductory verse.B****, I'm a monster no-good blood sucker Fat motherf***er, now look who's in trouble As you run through my jungles, all you hear is rumbles Kanye Wests sample, here's one for exampleMatthew Werner: You know doesn't it seem... kind of... redundant since we just had that video like.. five minutes ago.. Alecia Matthews: Look you gonna bust balls all night or just go with it? Matthew Werner: I guess when yo... Kurt Burton: OF COURSE HE'S GONNA BUST BALLS! HE'S MATTHEW WIENER! Matthew Werner: That doesn't even make sense! Burton and Matthews audibly high five once again.Matthew Werner: ... I'm just.. gonna do it.. I'm going back to college... I'll patch things up with my dad... Oh sorry I thought I muted myself. Click.The lights begin to raise up as the first chorus begins revealing a large, red, brick wall having been set up on the left side of the stage.Gossip, gossip, n****, just stop it Everybody know (I'm a motherf***in' monster) I'ma need to see your f***in' hands at the concert I'ma need to see your f***in' hands at the concertFinally, at long last, Alex Sean walks onto the stage to a mostly exuberant response with a smattering of boos from the very last of the official Trace Demon Babyface Bandwagon hold-outs and a larger number of people going through the cycle of not recognizing him, then recognizing him, then realizing the implications of his aged face, then momentarily reckoning with existential terror, then stuffing that the f*** down because who needs that, then cheering! Yay!Kurt Burton: THIS IS INCREDIBLE! I HAVEN'T SEEN A RESPONSE LIKE THIS IN YEARS! Alecia Matthews: How many WFWF shows have you watched anytime recently? Kurt Burton: JUST THIS ONE WE'RE ON BAY-BAY! WHOOO! Matthew Werner: Kind of a small sample size don't ya... Kurt Burton: YOU'RE A SMALL SAMPLE SIZE, JERK-BRONI! Matthew Werner: Alllirght... Alex Sean walks on to stage, a frustrated look on his face as he locks eyes with his longtime associate Lamont Carter. Carter goes in for the dap however Sean visibly mouths "You said you weren't going to talk about Yakub!" holding his arms out in befuddlement. He quickly shakes it off and reciprocates the dap though visibly insisting "We'll talk later." Sean turns his attention to the audience and seems genuinely touched by their enthusiastic response.Alecia Matthews: Listen to these fans! Alex Sean seems genuinely touched by their enthusiastic response! Before he can truly soak in the moment, he is distracted by Lamont Carter who cocks his head toward the giant wall to their left and, though we cannot hear him perfectly, seems to ask Sean "what's with them lil' white devils over there?" We, as well as Sean, peer over to find a couple of white kids who promptly cup their hands up to their mouth...White Kids: HEY KOOL-AID! Sean is justifiably perplexed until... The KOOL-AID MAN bursts through the giant brick wall in all of his red glory!KOOL-AID Man: OHHH YEEEAHHH! Sean's mouth is agape, only periodically broken up by mutterings to the effect of "The Kool-Aid Man?" and "Does that really count as a monster?".Kurt Burton: Kooooooooooooool... Aiiiiiiiidddd!!! AH-HA! THIS IS AWESOME! The audience begins to emphatically cheer "Kooooooool... Aiiiiiid" as the beverage kaiju navigates the stage toward Alex Sean; His pitcher body visibly filled with actual liquid that sloshes around with every step. With a shrug and a look toward Lamont, Sean makes his way toward his destined foe, pausing for a moment to play to the audience.Alecia Matthews: These fans in Baltimore are loving this! Matthew Werner: I mean who doesn't like Kool-Aid? With a spring in his step, Alex Sean cleans The KOOL-AID Man's clock with a theatrical right hand sending him careening over the side of the ramp and his sugary innards splashing outward over the first several rows of fans! Having bested his powder-packet adversary, Alex Sean gives a sort of "I got this" nod to Lamont Carter who obliges and exits to the backstage as the "Monster" makes his way down the ramp.Alecia Matthews: It has been a long time coming, I can't wait to see what Alex Sean has in store for us. It's clear the audience's enthusiasm has him hyped as he wastes no time, walking at a brisk pace down the ramp and just as quickly sprinting up the steps. He pauses for a moment... catching his breath... giving the fans a "I'm too old for this sh**t" kind of look, before ascending the ropes from the outside and standing with one foot on the middle rope and one foot on the top buckle. We pan to a wide shot of Sean perched on the ropes staring out at his hometown crowd.Matthew Werner: I've known Alex for a really long time and this is genuinely one of the best moments of his career, I hope he feels the same way. Kurt Burton: OH YEAH! I'm sure he's probably been thinkin', worrying whether fans had forgotten him. It's obvious that at least here in MOBTOWN, he's still just as much a legend to them as he ever was! Sean clutches a firm grasp on the top rope then, after a deep breath, springs his legs over and lands on his feet. The music begins to fade, Sean removes his entrance jacket, and the arena lights begin to raise. No doubt about it: It's Showtime! For the first time this evening, Sean takes a look at his foe; The much admired DAVID HANDLECATCH!. They meet in the center, staring one another down. No words are spoken, unless they are communicating psychically. Which would be unlikely. With these two stars of yesteryear standing dead center in the ring looking eye to eye, the referee calls for the bell and our main event is officially underway!Kurt Burton: LET'S DO THIS! J'YEAH! The fans roar in excitement! For the first time since SuperBrawl VII in 2011, Alex Sean is competing inside of a WFWF ring! This spike in audience response draws the attention of both men, Sean nodding in excitement while HANDLECATCH! displays a much slower, wise masterly nod. This in turn amplifies the crowd even more, which amplifies both men even more, it's pandemonium in here!Kurt Burton: THESE PEOPLE ARE GONNA BRING THE ROOF DOWN! Alecia Matthews: Oh please for the love of God we cannot afford for that to... She pauses. ... Oh you were just... Kurt Burton: Yeah... Alecia Matthews: Sorry it's uh... it's been a long few years around here... The crowd, Sean, even HANDLECATCH! are all hyped up; HANDLECATCH! still noticeably more muted by based on his increasing perspiration levels... he hype. Sean begins alternating his attention between riling the fans and his opponent. He begins gesturing and talking to HANDLECATCH!. Though we cannot hear what he's saying, it appears based on his body language he is challenging HANDLECATCH! to go toe-to-toe with him in the middle of the ring for the pleasure of these great fans!Matthew Werner: Sean is hyped! I have to say I'm surprised how much he seems to want to give this crowd a good show! Alecia Matthews: No doubt! After visibly ruminating on the possibility, HANDLECATCH! nods in approval, slapping his own kimono clad chest and daring Sean to throw the first strike!Kurt Burton: WOW! THIS IS CRAZY! THESE GUYS ARE ABOUT TO GO TOE-TO-TOE! FIST-FOR-FIST! AW'YEAH! Alecia Matthews: The fans love these stand-off exchanges and I can only imagine what kind of thrilling, back-and-forth battle we're about to witness between the martial arts master DAVID HANDLECATCH! and the legendary striker Alex Sean! The two meet dead center in the ring for this epic face off, DAVID HANDLECATCH! still inviting Sean to take the first shot. After playing to the crowd a bit more, Sean plants his feet and throws what would surely have been a devastating overhand right. While it is impossible to say whether the culprit Sean's smooth, leather gloves, HANDLECATCH!'s increasing perspiration, or Sean's decreasing coordination with age... most likely a combination of all three conspire toward the unfortunate outcome of Sean's attempt at an overhand right punch to slip off of HANDLECATCH!'s cheek and make direct contact with the center of his throat. HANDLECATCH!, unsurprisingly, reacts like he just got hit with a trademark Denzel Washington throat chop. ... It's bad, ya'll.Matthew Werner: Oh my. Alecia Matthews: Audibly throwing papers in a trash bin. Anybody here know how to write a good cover letter? HANDLECATCH! gags and chokes, clutching his throat. Sean reaches a hand out for support but is waved off by HANDLECATCH! who appears to maintain some semblance of warrior spirit. He begins nodding assuringly, indicating he just needs a moment before coughing and gagging more and falling to one knee. The audience's enthusiasm has seized up as much as HANDLECATCH!'s windpipe and Alex Sean is left wincing, looking around apologetically at the fans in attendance.Matthew Werner: I don't think this was how anybody wanted this to go... certainly least of all DAVID HANDLECATCH! but also... for Sean... this is no way to make a return. Alecia Matthews: For sure. Accidents do happen in the ring, it's a contact sport. A combat sport, for that matter. But the timing here is just dreadful. Kurt Burton: HAVE YOU TWO JERK-BRONIS LOST YOUR FRICK'IN MINDS!? Burton pauses, allowing them to indicate whether in fact these two jerk-bronis have lost their frick'in minds. ... HE CLEEEEAAAAAARRRRLLLYYYY... DID THAT ON PURPOSE! Matthew Werner: What? Noooooo.... Nooo way... Contemplating it. ... Probably... not? Right? Alecia Matthews: I mean... we watched the highlight video... that did make a pretty compelling case that uh... I dunno, we probably shouldn't speculate... All parties in the ring are a little worse for wear; HANDLECATCH! still down to one knee clutching his throat, Sean showing his hands to the crowd apologetically, and the referee, once again Erik Everhard, who seems at a loss for what to do. He catches eyes with a confused Daehyun Moon and appears to communicate something to the chiseled mountain of muscle who's eyes crinkle in disapproval and visibly mouths "He punched him in the throat?" before shaking his head. The Baltimore crowd certainly loves their hometown guy but no doubt about it, the vibe is well and truly f***ed.Kurt Burton: Frankly... I APPROVE! Werner and Matthews audibly disapprove of his approval. ... CRAM IT JERK-BRONIS! WHY. ON EARTH. Would two people stand there and let each other hit each other... ON PURPOSE!? All I'm saying is... Alex Sean is a master manipulator. He goaded HANDLECATCH! into a stand off... which... HE ACCEPTED... LIKE... A JERK-BRONI... and Sean capitalized. To be honest I'm actually kind of impressed. It appears, at long last, that HANDLECATCH! has begun to catch his breath and recover, likely not suffering any significant damage. He begins to raise to his feet, his courage inspiring the Baltimore crowd!Alecia Matthews: Well whatever the case it looks like DAVID HANDLECATCH! is still in this fight, guys! HANDLECATCH! erects (lol) to a fully upright position and stares Sean down with a ferocity in his eyes. It appears, perhaps, Kurt Burton is not the only individual suspicious of Sean's motives. Sean, meanwhile, has been rendered almost entirely passive, apologizing meekly and offering to allow DAVID to get a free shot on him. DAVID HANDLECATCH! however TAKES. NO. FREE. SHOTS! He challenges Sean, dares him to come at him! If it's a fight Sean wants, HANDLECATCH! is ready to oblige!Kurt Burton: HELL YEAH! LET'S STOP WITH ALL THIS SILLY BUSINESS AND LET'S SEE TWO GUYS FRICK'IN FIGHT ALREADY! The crowd begins to amp back up, Sean getting back in the zone as well. Perhaps the route to this scenario was unexpected, but these two men are about to do battle! DAVID HANDLECATCH! brings his arms up, gesturing a "come on" pose like Neo in The Matrix to Sean and settling in to a fight pose. With his eye on the prize, Alex Sean springs away from HANDLECATCH toward the ring ropes. He makes contact and leaps off in a dash back toward his opponent.Matthew Werner: Alex Sean is on the move! Alecia Matthews: I wouldn't be so sure of this course of action! HANDLECATCH! has had minutes to recover, he could himself be luring Sean... Sean comes hurtling toward the waiting HANDLECATCH! ferociously. The look on Sean's eyes says he is waiting for what HANDLECATCH! may have up his light-weight, silken sleeve. Sean seems prepared for all possibilities as he closes the distance and... collides with DAVID HANDLECATCH! with a devastating Left-Arm Lariat meeting zero resistance and crumpling the martial arts master!Alecia Matthews: Hrm ... Okay well... nevermind... Alex Sean is as surprised as anyone, the wind being as much out of the fans' sails as DAVID HANDLECATCH!'s lungs. With a look of exasperation, Sean crawls over to the fallen DAVID HANDLECATCH! and hooks the leg. It is merely a formality as Erik Everhard counts the three and Alex Sean is declared the winner.Matthew Werner: What a weird f***ing night guys... Alecia Matthews: Yup... Sean rolls off of HANDLECATCH! and to a seated position, his eyes filled with a visible look of disappointment.Daehyun Moon: Heeeere is your winnnerrr..... ALLLLEEEEXXXXXXX SSSSSSSSSSSEEEEAAAAANNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN! There aren't zero fans excited about this outcome. Some came to see the wrestlers they know do the moves they remember them doing and, to some extent, they saw that. There is, however, a palpable sense of disappointment in the crowd. "Monster" by Kanye West begins to play over the PA system and, clearly prepared for a different sort of moment, large purple and gold balloons and confetti begin to drop from the ceiling while the digital banners in the building's rafters read "Welcome Home, Alex Sean!"Kurt Burton: Hey look... a win's a win, right? Alecia Matthews: I suppose Alex Sean could find some solace in that, right? The confetti and balloons falling from the ceiling litter the visible exit of easily hundreds of fans. Seated inside the ring, Alex Sean is littered in it as well looking like Navorro Bowman after Super Bowl XLVII. Alecia Matthews: ... Well there's always next time. Not reading the room entirely well, Bobby Abadi makes his way to the ring looking around with a kind of Hillary Clinton at the 2016 Democratic Convention feigned surprise at the ceremony. Matthew Werner: Well it's been... quite... the evening... Alecia Matthews: I'll tell you what though; We made it. Kurt Burton: Alecia, you want to send us off? Alecia Matthews: Gladly. For Alecia Matthews. Matthew Werner: Matthew Werner. Kurt Burton: THE ROCK STAAHHRR KURT BURTON! Alecia Matthews: This has been Ascension, folks. We'll see you all in two weeks in Washington, D.C.! And with that, as Bobby Abadi enters the ring consoling a visibly dejected Alex Sean, the show fades to black as the WFWF logo appears on-screen. We did it, guys! Albeit... 24+ hours late but... That's on me! I'm living and learning ya'll!
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Post by Swarm on Jul 2, 2022 17:59:04 GMT -5
Segment IndexSegment 1Cold Open Opening Video Package M̴̊͐E̴̓͘S̷͑͝H̶̾̐ vs. POISONSegment 2Alex Sean Highlight Video 01 Bobby Abadi Announcement for Scars & Stripes / DGX Promo VOID.Segment 3Alex Sean Highlight Video 02 TITUS! Speaks / TITUS! vs. Trekkie EBR Interview with Katherine FabianiSegment 4Alex Sean Highlight Video 03 Trace Demon Interview / Shuggy Promo Ascension Recap and Preview for He'll Kick You Apart, He'll Kick You Apart! Alex Sean Highlight Video 04Segment 5Alex Sean vs. DAVID HANDLECATCH!
Credits Cold Open Alex
Opening Video Package Alex
M̴̊͐E̴̓͘S̷͑͝H̶̾̐ vs. POISON M̴̊͐E̴̓͘S̷͑͝H̶̾̐
Alex Sean Highlight Video 01 Alex
Bobby Abadi Announcement for Scars & Stripes / DGX Promo DGX
VOID. VOID.
Alex Sean Highlight Video 02 Alex
TITUS! Speaks / TITUS! vs. Trekkie TITUS!
EBR Interview with Katherine Fabiani EBR
Alex Sean Highlight Video 03 Alex
Trace Demon Interview / Shuggy Promo Trace Demon & Shuggy
Ascension Recap and Preview for He'll Kick You Apart, He'll Kick You Apart! Alex
Alex Sean Highlight Video 04 Alex
Alex Sean vs. DAVID HANDLECATCH! Alex
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Post by jdfranchise on Jul 2, 2022 19:31:48 GMT -5
This is a sexuh set of results, Alex. Definitely worth the wait. From top to bottom, you wouldn't even know that we had some of the irl stuff we had come up.
A few thoughts:
I absolutely love DGX/Trace being the main event for the next show. I can't wait to read the work they put out for the match.
The Alex hype promos really made the story of Alex's disappointment to close the show even better. Nice way to build that up.
TITUS! might just be the greatest thing ever. That is all.
Loved EBR's sit down. Excited to do mine.
Shuggy just minding his own business. Trace just looking for a reason.
Kurt Burton and Werner dynamic is something I didn't realize I needed until I saw it in action.
Next card looks stacked. Can't wait!
Great job all around, guys!
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Post by sonstuds on Jul 3, 2022 10:29:53 GMT -5
Awesome job, man.
- It's very impressive when you consider this was a show that ultimately only had two matches and you were able to fill it out so effectively
- The dynamic between Matthews, Werner, and Burton is great and it was incredibly entertaining throughout
- Loved the .gifs, the recurring bits ("They never lost them", Matthews and Burton high fiving in Werner's face)
- The fact that you actually went through with the effort to write the opening video package and with Chin Up High cannot be overstated. lol at Rev and Penny/Scarlett having the X's over them
- The Mesh/POISON match was fun with Mason coming out at the end
- DGX having a crier
- TITUS! is the best
- That Void thing was interesting and well done on the graphics
- Shuggy walking though during the Trace promo ala the director of photography on that Terminator movie with Christian Bale was awesome and I love that feud
- The recurring highlight packages chronicling Sean's career were done very well, all so it can lead to an incredibly disappointing and uneventful match was even better
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Post by Markw on Jul 3, 2022 12:20:40 GMT -5
This was great. Has anyone ever lost the tag titles? Loving the continued attempts to revive VHS alongside the WFWF. Mesh's return to being bright and bubbly at the start, but then ultimately not shaking Johnny's hand has me very excited for their encounter. I would have liked the end to flatter POISON a little more (a pin after a 20 count?) but otherwise great stuff, and as I say, very excited to see where Mesh goes from here and for her title match with Mason. From EBR’s awesome interview, to the lack of wrestling, to the Kool-Aid Man this show made me wish I was running Bishop so much. Oh well Shuggy’s fun, right… right? As E said, the juxtaposition of all the hype of Alex's comeback and then the match being that was great. A 'bad' show done incredibly well. And an awful lot to be excited about for the next one.  pmsl
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Post by Drakz on Jul 5, 2022 13:34:17 GMT -5
Kurt Burton: LOOK, I DONT LIKE DGX! I'M NOT FRIENDS WITH DGX!
Long pause.
Alecia Matthews: .... but?
Kurt Burton: What? That was it.
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Joined on: Jun 5, 2023 4:44:50 GMT -5
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Post by Deleted on Jul 9, 2022 6:11:33 GMT -5
Okay so again, I am very late to the party. I love the usage of JIFS and the overall more humorous presentation of the WFWF. During my time at the helm, I definitely presented things in a more serious manner and looking back, I feel like the shows suffered as a result. "Opening - match #1 - segment - match #2 - segment - match #3 - closing". They were very formulaic. This new approach with using graphics and videos to enhance (there's that word again xDDD) the overall experience makes reading through such large walls of texts VERY entertaining so kudos to you for finding that balance where it's not just comedy, we can be serious too if needed and there were moments here like that. First thing I'll put over is the chemistry between Burton, Werner and Matthews. Drakz highlighted my favorite part as well xDDD it's a thing in wrestling (or sports for that matter, maybe) that having too many commentators is too much but I feel like with that kind of chemistry, it works perfectly. Another slight during my time at the helm - I feel like I moved Matthews and at the time, Knight and Dachs away from being the color commentators and made them more into the comedy relief. Matthews would call the action as it happened, Knight/Dachs would then retort with a witty one-liner or joke. I don't know about everyone else but that got old REALLY fast after a while. What was presented here was a balancing act where it was funny but it wasn't overdone. I'm not sure if I've ever mentioned this on here but I find myself saying, "F**king EBR" whenever reading anything he posts, whether it be on here on the Discord because aside from it being entertaining as hell, he is such a talented writer. He could make the most boring thing in the world amusing and entertaining. Tagging sonstuds so you can see this <3 I'm beyond hyped for Shuggy and Trace Demon. I didn't actually pick up on that during the press conference that Shugs was going to feud with Trace so it caught me off guard when I saw them interact here again. Typically Shuggy, oblivious to his surroundings and interrupts a promo with realizing it, hahahaha. Mark, the writer against Trace, the writer is why I'm so hooked. Yes, Markw - Shuggy is fun <3 As stated before, I LOVED the vignettes and hype around the main event....only for it it to "suck" xDDDDDDDD Can we all agree that the only disappointment from this show was DAVID HANDLECATCH not posting an RP? Another thing I really enjoyed was the table of contents and credits at the end of show. It wraps up the entire show as a team effort, which is what it should be and people get the credit that is due. It's the little things. All and all, things truly ascended at Ascension and things are only looking up from here *ba-dum-tskkkkkkkk*
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