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Post by Midnight-Metal-Master on Feb 14, 2014 2:32:12 GMT -5
Ok so my gf and I have been dating for about 2 months now. She's 22. I'm 25 we both just got out of a bad relationship mine was 5 yrs her's was 7. we both have one child by our past partner. I won't go into detail about everything except what I think has become a huge problem! I really need some advice on this one! Ok about 3weeks ago maybe I started to notice that she's been acting different....like A lot different. Seems like she hardly wants to make any physical contact with me and if I approach her with it seems like she just really don't want me to?! I usually make plans for Friday night when I get off work at 7:30pm. She doesn't work Fridays but still manages to show up at my house at like 9 or 10pm. She got super pissed when I picked up and looked at her phone she even went as far as adding a pass code with she didn't have before. She gets frustrated or mad when I ask her if I can go somewhere with her. Ex sample tomorrow she has to go meet her land lord and pick up her laptop from her cousins house I asked to go and it was like she got pissed and just flat out said "NO I won't be gone that long so no" She texts and talks on her phone a lot! She insists on paying for her own stuff (I still pay for her anytime we go out to eat or movies or just anything and she kinda gives me crap about it?!?!) The other night we were having sex and she stopped me in the middle of intercourse and said she really had to pee when she came back she just laid down and I was like wtf?!? She tried to make me feel guilty for getting pissed and that I asked to be "finished off" so you could say  Iv approached her with some of these and a few others I didn't mention. I have no problem telling her what I feel about her or the relationship but when I do she kinda just turns the casual talking into a fight and says "it's always something, everyday blah blah crap" also like I said one Friday she turned up at 11pm and said something came up and gave me some ridiculous excuse and when I got mad about it I didn't show in anger I just showed in a different way by saying to myself maybe I'm not gonna care as much? When I did that I became less affection with her and she noticed after 2 days and cried about it and seemed like she was making an excuse to break up with me then! |
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Post by Lorenzo Alcazar on Feb 14, 2014 2:43:18 GMT -5
Not to be whatever, but she just sounds like a lot of drama. Drama is never good, and if you've only been dating for 2 months and it's already like this, it's only going to get worse. People usually go through a pretty decent "new car" phase of relationships where everything is awesome before it starts to get routine or the weirdness and drama starts to come out.
Unless you think you see yourself marrying this girl, honestly, I'd bail. It's not worth your time or the stress for something that's going nowhere.
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Post by hbkbigdaddycool on Feb 14, 2014 3:34:35 GMT -5
The same thing happened to me with an ex girlfriend once... and well... it wasn't good. She was into another guy, and I was either dumb or blind - or just pretended to not see the obvious - but once we broke up, she got with the new guy so fast, it makes me believe she was being with him while her and I were together.
I am not telling you what to do, but just keep your eyes open. Follow your head, not your heart. If you get a gut feeling that she's cheating, or something is up, then it's probably so.
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Post by Darkhawk on Feb 14, 2014 3:42:46 GMT -5
First of all relationships shouldn't be this way in the first 2 months people usually don't have problems until later throughout the relationship, because the first few months you two should of been full of love and happiness and problem free. If you're having problems already and it's only been 2 months that's a major problem. Also if she's on birth control there's a side effect that makes women get disgusted by their bf/husband regardless it's a fact and it's something most to all people don't know about which is why girls act different all of a sudden. Now from what I read she's not worth it and will most likely soon cheat on you, I would just save yourself the trouble and break it off now, because think about it if you stay you're going to go through tons of crap and drama from her and eventually you'll break up and in the end you'll feel like you wasted your time.
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Post by Ian from 616Entertainment. on Feb 14, 2014 4:03:47 GMT -5
You don't need this sh*t in your life.
Just get out. 2 months? You know from experience that's nothing. Release this girl and wish her the best in her future endeavors.
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Deleted
Joined on: May 5, 2024 10:03:37 GMT -5
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Post by Deleted on Feb 14, 2014 4:27:13 GMT -5
The fact that you're coming here to decide should tell you that you probably don't want to be with her, and that's what matters. We, the collection of jackasses on a wrestling toy forum, shouldn't be the ones deciding for you.
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Post by DgenerationX092 on Feb 14, 2014 4:40:20 GMT -5
Bail.
Based alone off of what you said, it sounds like she just wants the comfort and security of having someone at her disposal. She wants a boyfriend, but doesnt seem to give a sh*t until she felt she was losing you. You're her safety net, her security blanket. You're her tool.
She has trouble letting you in as per her blocking out your attempts to spend more time with her. You should be in the Honeymoon Phase, she shoulnt be able to get enough of you right now. So that right off the bat sounds weird; sounds like you guys are far along to where shes comfortable and lazy with you. Which brings me back to the Safety Net. Once she had you reeled in she let her guard down and may do as she pleases, cuz she has her guy at home. You're a pet to her. Once you tried taking yourself out of the equation leaving her alone, she suddenly has emotion? Forget that.
Everything points to you simply being a leg for her to stand on. Kick it out and she falls. But until then she wont respect you and will continue taking you for granted. She wants you to shut up, know your place and like it.
So if you have self respect for yourself, dont put yourself through this any longer and show her you dont need her as much as she needs you. And she doesnt even need YOU specifically. She'll take anyone. Let her go now she'll be wifed up again in two months.
Good luck bro.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Feb 14, 2014 7:04:43 GMT -5
if she can't handle the discussion of what you want out of a relationship///complaining about it always being something...is closed off & sneaking around hiding things, do what you gotta do
I'd hit the bricks
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Post by Midnight-Metal-Master on Feb 14, 2014 7:58:43 GMT -5
Thank you guys for helping understand this situation alittle better, every comment made perfect sense and I was almost thinking the exact same thing all of you said...I do think it's maybe gonna be hard to let her go...probably more for me than her because I really have fallen in love with her but I just don't feel it from her. I just have to do it
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Post by Scotty on Feb 14, 2014 8:10:21 GMT -5
I'd bring it up with her, its better than just cutting it off without knowing.
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Post by Jack on Feb 14, 2014 8:30:33 GMT -5
Just be honest to her, thats probs the best thing to do, also lets you find out the truth.
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Quazimoto
Superstar
Joined on: Feb 4, 2014 12:37:37 GMT -5
Posts: 993 
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Post by Quazimoto on Feb 14, 2014 10:07:22 GMT -5
Yeah, I've been through a similar situation myself and really have to echo the sentiments above. Sounds like you're way more invested in the relationship than she is and it might be best to break it off sooner rather than later. Maybe talk to her first though. There's a bundle of reasons why a person might be acting a bit shady that don't involve hooking up with someone else. But, at the end of the day, if you don't feel it with this girl, then that's probably all you need to know right there.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Feb 14, 2014 10:08:22 GMT -5
Tell her all this stuff.
Then get rid of her.
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Post by LeighD on Feb 14, 2014 10:16:39 GMT -5
Man all those points definitely raise red flags. It very well could be nothing, but it sounds like something is up or off. I don't necessarily meaning cheating, but something doesn't feel right.
One of the biggest it the whole cell phone thing. Suddenly putting something on like that its because a) she is hiding something or b) a bit of a privacy freak, which isn't good. I have a pass code on mine, my wife knows it too. I have always said she can look at my phone, email, etc whenever she wants as I have nothing to hide.
I would approach her and tell her all these things you have told us. If she brushes it off or tries to downplay it, ended. If this is a serious relationship with both of looking at this for a long-term thing, communication and honestly need to start first.
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Post by Halloween King on Feb 14, 2014 10:20:37 GMT -5
If she's acting different, and the biggest red flag to me is putting a pass code on her phone, then I'd say something is up. Ask her, be a man and directly ask her if you two are done.
I have no secrets between me and my wife. My wife is the 1 person in this world who I trust with everything. So if I put a pass code on my phone or vice versa that tells me you're trying to hide something.
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Post by Brad on Feb 14, 2014 11:19:30 GMT -5
Sure sounds like she's cheating.
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y2josh
Main Eventer
WF 10 Year Member
Gold Ranger Power.
Joined on: Dec 18, 2001 15:13:21 GMT -5
Posts: 3,237
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Post by y2josh on Feb 14, 2014 11:30:21 GMT -5
Dude, this broad is boffing someone else. It's time to get out. TRUST ME.
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StingerSplash
Main Eventer
Give em' the Scorpion Death Drop.
Joined on: Jun 6, 2009 11:30:40 GMT -5
Posts: 3,976
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Post by StingerSplash on Feb 14, 2014 13:22:40 GMT -5
I'll go ahead and get this out of the way: RKO her.
In reality, I'd get rid of her.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Feb 14, 2014 13:26:11 GMT -5
She would not need the pass code on her phone if you wouldn't try to read the messages we send each other.
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cioffdogg
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Post by cioffdogg on Feb 14, 2014 14:11:38 GMT -5
Run, man, run.
Two months in you both should still be in the "honeymoon" period where everything is blissful, you're learning about the other person. You should think the sun rises and sets on her ass, and she should think the same of you! There certainly shouldn't be so much drama this early on in the relationship, and if there is it should be sending up some major red flags in terms of your future with her.
Every relationship is different. I know some couples who seem to *thrive* on drama. It doesn't sound like you're a big fan of drama though. It sounds like she has a lot of unresolved issues that she needs to take care of. You need to learn how to love yourself before you can love someone else. That's a given. If you were 2 years into the relationship, I'd say work it out. 2 months man, cut your losses and move on. It's not going to get better and I doubt there's that much emotional investment really for either one of you.
I would also suggest maybe giving yourself some time as a single man before you jump right back into the dating pool. 5 years isn't a short amount of time to be together, and in my experience it often leads to jumping into a rebound relationship because you're trying to replace what you had with your previous flame. I was in a relationship for a year with this girl, we ended up splitting and within a few months I was dating someone else and it wasn't a good relationship overall. I wished I had given myself some more time being single before I jumped right back in, so I went a couple years after I had broken up with this second girl before even dating, much less seeking a relationship.
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