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Post by Jimmy on Mar 5, 2010 2:05:54 GMT -5
Marge: Have you noticed any change in Bart? Homer: New glasses? Marge: No...he looks like something might be disturbing him. Homer: Probably misses his old glasses. Marge: I guess we could get more involved in Bart's activities but then I'd be afraid of smothering him. Homer: Yeah, and then we'd get the chair. Marge: That's not what I meant. Homer: It was, Marge, admit it.
Carl: Hey, I heard we're goin' to Ape Island. Lenny: Yeah, to capture a giant ape. Carl: I wished we were going to Candy Apple Island. Charlie: Candy Apple Island? What do they got there? Carl: Apes. But they're not so big.
Kirk: You're letting me go?! Boss: Kirk, crackers are a family food. Happy families. Maybe single people eat crackers, we don't know. Frankly, we don't want to know. It's a market we can do without. Kirk: So that's it, after twenty years: "So long, good luck"? Boss: I don't recall saying "good luck."
Homer: Huh? Golf course? Did I dream that whole thing? Maybe the desert was just this sand trap. Oh, and I bet that crazy pyramid was just the pro shop. And that talking coyote was really just a talking dog. Dog: Hi, Homer. Find your soulmate. Homer: Hey, wait a minute! There's no such thing as a talking dog! Dog: [barks] Homer: Damn straight!
DENNAL PLAN
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Post by Bartman on Mar 5, 2010 2:15:01 GMT -5
took this off imdb, cause I was too lazy to type it out. But one of my favourite Simpsons quotes everrrr....
FBI man 1: Tell you what, Mr. Simpson, from now on your name is Homer Thompson,at Terror Lake.Let's just practice a bit, hmmmm? So when I say hello Mr. Thompson, you say hi. Homer: Check!
FBI man 1: Hello, Mr. Thompson.
[Homer stares blankly]
FBI man 1: [pause]
FBI man 1: Now, remember, your name is Homer Thompson.
Homer: I gotcha!
FBI man 1: Hello, Mr. Thompson.
[again Homer stares blankly]
FBI man 1: [FBI men stare at each other]
[hours pass by]
FBI man 1: [frustrated] Argh... Now when I say "Hello Mr. Thompson" and press down on your foot, you smile and nod.
Homer: No problem.
[stepping hard on Homer's foot]
FBI man 1: Hello, Mr. Thompson.
[Homer stares blankly again for a few seconds]
Homer: [whispering to the FBI man next to him] I think he's talking to you.
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Post by slappy on Mar 5, 2010 2:17:06 GMT -5
Lisa: I before E except after C and in the cases of neighbor and weigh. Marge: How about Jim Nabors is way cool? Lisa: When will that ever come up? Marge: It's on the apron.
It goes something like that, quite amazing to be honest.
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WFK
Main Eventer
Leave The Memories Alone
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Posts: 4,632
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Post by WFK on Mar 5, 2010 2:26:17 GMT -5
Lisa: I before E except after C and in the cases of neighbor and weigh. Marge: How about Jim Nabors is way cool? Lisa: When will that ever come up? Marge: It's on the apron. It goes something like that, quite amazing to be honest.That's because Jim Nabors is way cool.
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Thunder
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WF 10 Year Member
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Post by Thunder on Mar 5, 2010 2:39:00 GMT -5
Ralph: Me fail English? That's unpossible!
Chalmers: Skinner, what's that going on in your kitchen? Skinner: Auroa borealis. Chalmers: Auroa borealis? At this time of year? In this part of the country? Located exclusively in your kitchen? Skinner: Yes. Chalmers: Can I see it? Skinner: No. Skinner's Mother: Seymour, the house is on fire! Skinner: No, mother. That's just the Northern Lights.
Really, that whole Skinner/Chalmers steamed clams scene is classic.
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Post by hbkjason on Mar 5, 2010 3:32:18 GMT -5
HOMER: Marge it takes 2 to lie, one to lie and one to listen
These 2 are from the same episode
HOMER: Kids theres 3 ways to do things, te right way, the wrong way and the Max Power BART: Isn't that the wrong way? HOMER: Yeah but faster.
MARGE: I fell in love with Homer SImpson I don't want to snuggle with Max Power. HOMER: No one snuggles with Max Power you strap on and feel the Gs.
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TTF4eva
Main Eventer
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Posts: 4,016
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Post by TTF4eva on Mar 5, 2010 3:35:06 GMT -5
I've always loved Moes lie detector's test: (couldnt be bothered typing it up.)
Eddie: Do you hold a grudge against Mr. Burns? Moe: No! (buzz) Moe: Okay, maybe I did, but I didn't shoot him! (ding) Eddie: Checks out. Okay, sir, you're free to go. Moe: Good, cause I've got a hot date tonight! (buzz) A date. (buzz) Dinner with friends. (buzz) Dinner alone. (buzz) Watching TV alone. (buzz) Alright! I'm going to sit at home and ogle the ladies in the Victoria's Secret catalog! (buzz) Sears catalog. (ding) Now, would you unhook this already, please?! I don't deserve this kind of shabby treatment! (buzz)
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Deja Voodoo
Superstar
Yup, it's Mike Haggar piledriving a Shark!!
Joined on: Oct 23, 2009 10:30:25 GMT -5
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Post by Deja Voodoo on Mar 5, 2010 5:56:44 GMT -5
Marge to Homer " Kids can be so cruel" Bart " We can? Thanks Mom." takes off down the hall Lisa yells "ouch" from down the hall
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Mar 5, 2010 6:37:01 GMT -5
"You tried your best and failed miserably. The lesson is never try."
I use that all the time. It's probably going to be my yearbook quote too.
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Post by Mr. PerpetuaLynch Motion on Mar 5, 2010 6:39:13 GMT -5
Here's one of my favorite ones from a recent episode
Bart: So where to Skinrash? Principal Skinner: My name isn't Skinrash, it's Principal Skinner and you will address me as such. Bart: Sure thing Such. Skinner: I'll deal with your insubordinate wordplay later...
I'll come back with more. Haha.
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Post by Deleted on Mar 5, 2010 6:59:37 GMT -5
took this off imdb, cause I was too lazy to type it out. But one of my favourite Simpsons quotes everrrr.... FBI man 1: Tell you what, Mr. Simpson, from now on your name is Homer Thompson,at Terror Lake.Let's just practice a bit, hmmmm? So when I say hello Mr. Thompson, you say hi. Homer: Check! FBI man 1: Hello, Mr. Thompson. [Homer stares blankly] FBI man 1: [pause] FBI man 1: Now, remember, your name is Homer Thompson. Homer: I gotcha! FBI man 1: Hello, Mr. Thompson. [again Homer stares blankly] FBI man 1: [FBI men stare at each other] [hours pass by] FBI man 1: [frustrated] Argh... Now when I say "Hello Mr. Thompson" and press down on your foot, you smile and nod. Homer: No problem. [stepping hard on Homer's foot] FBI man 1: Hello, Mr. Thompson. [Homer stares blankly again for a few seconds] Homer: [whispering to the FBI man next to him] I think he's talking to you. was just talking about this last night in work!!brillaint episode!!
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Post by LtD73 on Mar 5, 2010 9:22:15 GMT -5
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Post by Jimmy on Mar 5, 2010 11:36:08 GMT -5
I call the big one 'Bitey'.
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Post by White Trash Lucha on Mar 5, 2010 11:53:13 GMT -5
STEAMED HAMS
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Post by gordon on Mar 5, 2010 11:55:18 GMT -5
Ned Flanders: I’ve done everything the Bible says — even the stuff that contradicts the other stuff!
Chief Wiggum: Uh, no, you got the wrong number. This is 9-1…2.
Milhouse: Remember the time he ate my goldfish? And you lied and said I never had goldfish. Then why did I have the bowl, Bart? *Why did I have the bowl?*
Lionel Hutz: Well, he’s kind of had it in for me ever since I accidentally ran over his dog. Actually, replace “accidentally” with “repeatedly” and replace “dog” with “son.”
Homer: I’m normally not a praying man, but if you’re up there, please save me, Superman.
Chief Wiggum: I hope this has taught you kids a lesson: kids never learn.
Homer: Every time I learn something new, it pushes some old stuff out of my brain. Remember when I took that home winemaking course, and I forgot how to drive?
Chief Wiggum: They only come out in the night. Or in this case, uh, the day.
Homer: He didn’t give you gay, did he? Did he?!
Homer: What’s the point of going out? We’re just going to wind up back here anyway.
Homer: How could you?! Haven’t you learned anything from that guy who gives those sermons at church? Captain Whatshisname?
Moe: Well, I'm better than dirt. Well, most kinds of dirt. I mean not that fancy store bought dirt. That stuffs loaded with nutrients. I... I can't compete with that stuff.
Homer: Hello… My name is Mr. Burns. I believe you have a letter for me. Clerk: Okay, Mr. Burns, uhh, what’s your first name? Homer: I don’t know…
Mr. Burns: Damn it, Smithers, this isn’t rocket science; it’s brain surgery!
Bart: Take him away, boys. Chief Wiggum: Hey, I’m the chief here! Bake him away, toys. Lou: What’d you say, Chief? Chief Wiggum: Do what the kid says.
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Post by bad guy™ on Mar 5, 2010 13:39:48 GMT -5
My friend told me about this a few weeks ago and this line has been like...awesome ever since. Homer (in England): "Yeah; well our Beatles are better than your Rolling Stones!" I must say...that is full of win.
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Thunder
Main Eventer
WF 10 Year Member
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Post by Thunder on Mar 5, 2010 14:09:41 GMT -5
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Post by Barrett on Mar 5, 2010 15:10:01 GMT -5
Anything from the "Hurricane Neddy" episode.
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Post by The Sexy Psychotic on Mar 5, 2010 15:30:41 GMT -5
Theres loads, but some that come to me are;
And, "Your Tomorrow Nights Dinner"
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Post by Weemanv1 on Mar 5, 2010 15:36:59 GMT -5
Homer: Ah! English side ruined! Must use French instructions! Le Grill?! What the hell is that?!
Mr. Burns: Hm, and this must be...Brat! Bart: It's Bart, sir. Homer: Don't correct the man, Brat.
Homer: Operator, get me the number to 911!
Tennis Coach: Homer, this is Andre. Homer: You mean the wrestler?
Bart: Stan Lee's still here? Comic Book Guy: Stan Lee never left...
Homer: Ooo, floor pie!
Barney: All I'm saying is that when we die there'll be a planet for us, a planet for the Chinese, and we'll all be happier that way. Lisa: Mr. Gumble, you're offending me. Barney: No I'm not.
I could probably think of more, but those are the first ones that come to mind.
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